What have you got away with ?
Discussion
I was a ne'er do well youth, back in 2001. Myself and a couple of friends had just driven up to Edinburghs premier nightspot (Eros & Elite) on a cold early December evening, and purchased our tickets for their big NYE party. This was accompanied by 3 bottles of Miller, which at the time I felt was acceptable. I may or may not have also had a small bag of herbs in my pocket too...
We drove back to my hometown in my (very 'Max Power') mk2 Astra. We were buzzing, listening to terrible music, generally arsing about as young lads do. Being young lads, we were also blissfully unaware of how magnetic we were to cops. Unbeknownst to me, we were being followed by a panda car (too busy admiring my heavily-gelled spiky fringe in the mirrors no doubt).
Deciding to grab a chippy (deep-fried haggis supper, salt and sauce, 2 pickles please), I pulled over outside the shop and prepared to demonstrate my rather excellent parallel parking skills. Without so much as a glance in the rear view mirror, I whipped the old Astra back into the (just a second ago empty) space, only to hear a loud crunch.
Reversed right into the panda car. Not a great feeling.
Suddenly aware of the 3 beers in my belly and the Oregano in my pocket, I thought on my feet and decided that popping my glasses on would make me seem more studious/ bookish, and therefore make the coppers less likely to do stuff.
Talk about 'stuff you got away with'- I was breathalyzed and blew 'green'. The coppers felt no need to search/ sniff myself or my car. Given that neither car had any obvious damage, we were allowed to go on our way- after it was pointed out my taillight was out (why we were initially followed). I put it down to getting a wise old copper, a younger chap might have been more excitable. The specs clearly helped too. Always had the greatest respect for plod since.
Lessons learned:
-Dont touch Oregano, I blame a Uni friend for my brief flirtation
-Never exceed 2 bottles when driving, it probably does impair ones reactions/ awareness
-When parallel parking, even if you've seen the space is empty, always check that a panda car hasn't whipped in behind you
-If you do get pulled, put your specs on, glasses wearers are largely law abiding citizens
-Be respectful to cops, they will generally respect you back
We drove back to my hometown in my (very 'Max Power') mk2 Astra. We were buzzing, listening to terrible music, generally arsing about as young lads do. Being young lads, we were also blissfully unaware of how magnetic we were to cops. Unbeknownst to me, we were being followed by a panda car (too busy admiring my heavily-gelled spiky fringe in the mirrors no doubt).
Deciding to grab a chippy (deep-fried haggis supper, salt and sauce, 2 pickles please), I pulled over outside the shop and prepared to demonstrate my rather excellent parallel parking skills. Without so much as a glance in the rear view mirror, I whipped the old Astra back into the (just a second ago empty) space, only to hear a loud crunch.
Reversed right into the panda car. Not a great feeling.
Suddenly aware of the 3 beers in my belly and the Oregano in my pocket, I thought on my feet and decided that popping my glasses on would make me seem more studious/ bookish, and therefore make the coppers less likely to do stuff.
Talk about 'stuff you got away with'- I was breathalyzed and blew 'green'. The coppers felt no need to search/ sniff myself or my car. Given that neither car had any obvious damage, we were allowed to go on our way- after it was pointed out my taillight was out (why we were initially followed). I put it down to getting a wise old copper, a younger chap might have been more excitable. The specs clearly helped too. Always had the greatest respect for plod since.
Lessons learned:
-Dont touch Oregano, I blame a Uni friend for my brief flirtation
-Never exceed 2 bottles when driving, it probably does impair ones reactions/ awareness
-When parallel parking, even if you've seen the space is empty, always check that a panda car hasn't whipped in behind you
-If you do get pulled, put your specs on, glasses wearers are largely law abiding citizens
-Be respectful to cops, they will generally respect you back
Going down the A1 one Saturday afternoon to visit the now Mrs D I came up behind a police car near Chester le street. He pulled off down a slip road and I gunned it past him (GSXR 750). Unbeknown to me he went down the slip road and right back up onto the A1. Blue flashing lights and a telling off for an indicated speed of 94 mph. After telling me to slow down he sent me on my way.
I really really should have listened because I got caught on the way home on the Sunday. Not so lucky this time 6 points and £200.
3am drive back to Milton Keynes from my Parent's place in Chorleywood, I was joining the M1 North from the M25 and booted it up the slip road - roads totally empty - I must have been easily over a ton. There was one other car on the M1, it was doing exactly the same speed and I pulled along side it as I joined...
I look across and the copper in the passenger seat gave me a big grin and a 'naughty boy, stop it now' wag of the finger.
70mph was perfectly fine for the rest of the journey home.
I look across and the copper in the passenger seat gave me a big grin and a 'naughty boy, stop it now' wag of the finger.
70mph was perfectly fine for the rest of the journey home.
Edited by Asterix on Tuesday 25th November 06:21
Not quite sure how I got there, but fools are ingenious and all that...
Once I managed to pull up at an airport I knew quite well / used to work there to drop off a friend. I'd some how managed to circumvent all the concrete barriers put in place after those idiots tried to blow up Glasgow airport and ended up getting a good kicking from the locals whilst on fire.
A special branch police officer was stood by each front window in seconds and I got a fairly comprehensive b
king and told to disappear or be arrested under anti-terrorism laws. I thought that was a bit of a no-brainer really, so thanked them and left!
Once I managed to pull up at an airport I knew quite well / used to work there to drop off a friend. I'd some how managed to circumvent all the concrete barriers put in place after those idiots tried to blow up Glasgow airport and ended up getting a good kicking from the locals whilst on fire.
A special branch police officer was stood by each front window in seconds and I got a fairly comprehensive b
king and told to disappear or be arrested under anti-terrorism laws. I thought that was a bit of a no-brainer really, so thanked them and left!Car wise nothing much, beyond a few handbrake turns because the inner needs releasing sometimes.
On bikes...
I once pulled up aside a colleague in his EK9 Civic at some lights outside a stretch of road before the works car park and promptly made for a sprightly get away on my bike in some attempt to 'show off'. I neglected to take note that I'd left the bike in 2nd gear and with several thousand revs on the counter dumped the clutch and so proceeded to thrust forth with the front wheel a foot off the ground for a good 50 meters or more.
This was on a fairly major road into and out of a certain Yorkshire city with numerous cameras and speed camera devices, how nothing got reported I don't know.
I'm told it looked quite impressive, though my underwear probably didn't agree. It wasn't long after I gave up bikes as a bad job on the basis I was clearly going to kill myself and it was just a matter of when.
needs releasing sometimes.On bikes...
I once pulled up aside a colleague in his EK9 Civic at some lights outside a stretch of road before the works car park and promptly made for a sprightly get away on my bike in some attempt to 'show off'. I neglected to take note that I'd left the bike in 2nd gear and with several thousand revs on the counter dumped the clutch and so proceeded to thrust forth with the front wheel a foot off the ground for a good 50 meters or more.
This was on a fairly major road into and out of a certain Yorkshire city with numerous cameras and speed camera devices, how nothing got reported I don't know.
I'm told it looked quite impressive, though my underwear probably didn't agree. It wasn't long after I gave up bikes as a bad job on the basis I was clearly going to kill myself and it was just a matter of when.
daveofedinburgh said:
The coppers felt no need to search/ sniff myself or my car
They probably do their best to avoid sniffing ne'er do well youths.I have had a few of these in the last couple of years;
Towing the Caterham to Cadwell on a trailer behind my old 525i, running late and rushing to get to the B&B I had booked for the overnight before testing the next day. On a wide and open single carriageway road north towards Spalding I happened upon an HGV which was doing perhaps 55mph on a NSL stretch. Seeing that it was clear I passed and sped up to 70mph or so, and attacked the next roundabout with some verve. Little did I know there had been an unmarked Mondeo ST TDCI behind me all the while, who'd observed me passing the lorry over a solid white line, going 20mph over the speed limit (trailer considered) and sheening around the roundabout at a pace which he clearly thought a tow car and trailer ought not be sheened 'round at. Lone copper was quite upset with me. He checked all my tyres and my particulars, gave me a slap on the wrist and topped it all off with the inevitable "You aren't at the race track yet" line, before letting me on my way.
Towing the Caterham south from some track oop north, think it was Oulton, I was once again making progress late at night with the trailer. Blue lights from behind. Loath to stop on the M40 I acknowledged them, slowed to 50 or so and pulled off at the next slip road, stopping on a deserted industrial estate road. The two coppers were quite upset with me for going 20mph over the speed limit (trailer considered) and asserted that the trailer was 'all over the shop' (it tends to have a little wiggle which is noticable in the mirrors but looks worse than it is due to the length of the trailer. I never feel it through the steering wheel). They asked me if I felt the trailer swaying and I, in a moment of facepalming know-it-allism, responded that it was 'quite stable' at 81. There was a brief pause when the two coppers looked at each other, I was sure I was going to get the mother of all b
kings for daring to suggest 81mph was safe with a trailer, but no- they thanked me for not stopping on the M40 hard shoulder as "most people would've", gave me a slap on the wrist and capped it all off with the "your not at the race track any more" line.I have had 6 points in total but they have all been from machines. I have respect for police and that must be apparent when they have a word with me... I have learned that you can't get away with so much with a trailer in tow which is fair enough, I think they probably attend quite a lot of jacknifed caravans etc.
Many years ago as a skanky student, driving home in my '87 Escort 1.3 on the M3, the long straight downhill bit near Worthy Down. It was the end of term and the car was filled with student junk, including reptile terrarium on the back seat and 4' of python in a pillow case on the front seat.
I'd got up up to 90 odd in this over laden st heap when a marked volvo came past on the left, pulled out in front and flashed 'stop' across the matrix sign in the rear window. Naturally my speed became more reasonable and they buggered off.
I'd got up up to 90 odd in this over laden s
t heap when a marked volvo came past on the left, pulled out in front and flashed 'stop' across the matrix sign in the rear window. Naturally my speed became more reasonable and they buggered off.Some years back was having drive through country lanes in the 7, and came into a small village with its expected 30 mph speed limit. I dropped down to the posted limit, and carried on through the village. About halfway through it, a Vauxhall Carlton pulled out of a side road, and quickly pulled up to around 2 - 3 ft from the rear of my car. We both carried like this on at 30 mph, until I reached the NSL sign, and quickly accelerated up to the NSL. The Carlton was quickly left behind, so I just forgot about it. After about 4 miles, I reached a major road which I needed, and turned on to it. About 5 minutes later the Carlton came up behind at what must have been around 80 - 90 mph and went past, and pulled in front, with some blue lights flashing either side of its rear number plate. it was of course an un marked car, which then pulled up its pull over sign in the rear window. which I duly did.
The officer said you were going very fast back there, this is a fast car and I couldn't keep up with you, I agreed, but pointed out that I never exceeded the NSL, and that I had gapped him, owing to the sevens better cornering ability on some of the bends. He said I had been driving well, but I had to consider that some idiot (who was not driving well) might be coming the other way, and would take me out. Again I had to agree, that that was a possibility. After a few seconds of us wondering what else to say, he just said remember the idiot that might be coming the other way, then to my surprise he shook my hand, got in his car, and roared off into the distance.
The officer said you were going very fast back there, this is a fast car and I couldn't keep up with you, I agreed, but pointed out that I never exceeded the NSL, and that I had gapped him, owing to the sevens better cornering ability on some of the bends. He said I had been driving well, but I had to consider that some idiot (who was not driving well) might be coming the other way, and would take me out. Again I had to agree, that that was a possibility. After a few seconds of us wondering what else to say, he just said remember the idiot that might be coming the other way, then to my surprise he shook my hand, got in his car, and roared off into the distance.
Firstly I hadn't driven the car in around a month... (Oh yeah I would have been around 20-21?) I was on the way to a car meet (huge meet) in Perth (Aus). The popo were handing out defect notices left right and centre. Inevitably, I got pulled over by an unmarked brown Ford Territory (I'd made it by this point, was following everyone at about 20kmh right before the entrance to he meet.)
Asked me to pull over, I did, onto someone's driveway. Just quietly, my car at the time isn't exactly subtle... definitely not showy and was kept immaculate.
He was about to do me for having a roll cage (you need a permit), which I showed him the permit. Happy with that, I got let off with a warning for having an aftermarket exhaust which didn't have a permit.
Thank god he didn't look underneath as that exhaust had no cat... Which is a huuuuuge fine into thousands!
Off I went to the meet - was the only car that day who got pulled over and didn't receive a sticker.
Later that day, on the way home on the freeway. Its an 80kmh zone 4 lanes wide, I was doing 80 (nearly home). It finally becomes 100kmh. I dropped it back to 3rd, floored it to about 7 grand or so and just let it roll back to 100. Would have hit 160-170kmh. Unmarked black commodore pulls me over... st time for impound, loss of license, ban etc.
I'm mega apologetic to this stunning female copper who asks me why I got pulled over... I admitted fault straight away and kept saying sorry. She grabs my license and goes back to the car, comes out a few minutes later, walks around my car and says: Here's your license, take it easy next time. Couldn't believe it. If you've been to AUS you know how strict and tough police are on traffic laws. Been a good boy since (more or less!)
Sold the car soon after... Temptation was far too great.
Asked me to pull over, I did, onto someone's driveway. Just quietly, my car at the time isn't exactly subtle... definitely not showy and was kept immaculate.
He was about to do me for having a roll cage (you need a permit), which I showed him the permit. Happy with that, I got let off with a warning for having an aftermarket exhaust which didn't have a permit.
Thank god he didn't look underneath as that exhaust had no cat... Which is a huuuuuge fine into thousands!
Off I went to the meet - was the only car that day who got pulled over and didn't receive a sticker.
Later that day, on the way home on the freeway. Its an 80kmh zone 4 lanes wide, I was doing 80 (nearly home). It finally becomes 100kmh. I dropped it back to 3rd, floored it to about 7 grand or so and just let it roll back to 100. Would have hit 160-170kmh. Unmarked black commodore pulls me over... s
t time for impound, loss of license, ban etc.I'm mega apologetic to this stunning female copper who asks me why I got pulled over... I admitted fault straight away and kept saying sorry. She grabs my license and goes back to the car, comes out a few minutes later, walks around my car and says: Here's your license, take it easy next time. Couldn't believe it. If you've been to AUS you know how strict and tough police are on traffic laws. Been a good boy since (more or less!)
Sold the car soon after... Temptation was far too great.
Back in 2005, being 20 and in a mildly fast car I drove pretty much like a dick all the time. Was on my way home with a mate at about 12am, accelerated as fast as the car would go. Flat out in 3rd and 4th and 5th onto a dual carriage way. Car gave up at about 130mph so just let off the throttle and slowed down to about 75mph only for a black mondeo to come screaming up behind with its blue lights on!
Was given a massive bking but luckily for me the officer said he was not a traffic cop and it was a lot of paperwork so let me on my way - which I did at a much more subdued pace!
Was given a massive b
king but luckily for me the officer said he was not a traffic cop and it was a lot of paperwork so let me on my way - which I did at a much more subdued pace!having been living and driving in SE asia for the past decade or so, the list is rather long ..... many many cases of paying a RM50 (GBP10) bung to Malaysian bizzies for going 200kph upwards on the north south highway (speed limit 120KPH), riding scooters and motorbikes without lids, racing each other on the Changi Airport link road (911 and a 350z then later 370z and am M5) blatting Harley's with very non standard exhaists around town etc etc etc
most situations are resolved with the application of a few $$$ or some good bullst ...
edit to add, none of the above is big or clever, just the way it is ......
most situations are resolved with the application of a few $$$ or some good bulls
t ... edit to add, none of the above is big or clever, just the way it is ......
XJSJohn said:
having been living and driving in SE asia for the past decade or so, the list is rather long ..... many many cases of paying a RM50 (GBP10) bung to Malaysian bizzies for going 200kph upwards on the north south highway (speed limit 120KPH), riding scooters and motorbikes without lids, racing each other on the Changi Airport link road (911 and a 350z then later 370z and am M5) blatting Harley's with very non standard exhaists around town etc etc etc
most situations are resolved with the application of a few $$$ or some good bullst ...
Get that in India a lot - rozzers see a whitey on a bike and it's quite amusing the 'fine' they think appropriate. I simply set my pillion mounted "Indian Attack Wife" on them, and while we still have to pay something for them to save face, it's small beer in comparison.most situations are resolved with the application of a few $$$ or some good bulls
t ... Edited by Asterix on Tuesday 25th November 08:24
Asterix said:
XJSJohn said:
having been living and driving in SE asia for the past decade or so, the list is rather long ..... many many cases of paying a RM50 (GBP10) bung to Malaysian bizzies for going 200kph upwards on the north south highway (speed limit 120KPH), riding scooters and motorbikes without lids, racing each other on the Changi Airport link road (911 and a 350z then later 370z and am M5) blatting Harley's with very non standard exhaists around town etc etc etc
most situations are resolved with the application of a few $$$ or some good bullst ...
Get that in India a lot - rozzers see a whitey on a bike and it's quite amusing the 'fine' they think appropriate. I simply set my pillion mounted "Indian Attack Wife" on them, and while we still have to pay something for them to save face, it's small beer in comparison.most situations are resolved with the application of a few $$$ or some good bulls
t ... Edited by Asterix on Tuesday 25th November 08:24
that's why all my cars now have very heavy window tint's, even on the front windscreen - Have also used a similar model of attack wife, i normally just disappear into the sidelines... It is rather amusing the difference between being a Caucasian and an Asian is when it comes to transacting with the polisBack when I was 19 I had a 3.0 Omega engined Vectra, and as expected at that age it may have been driven just like John Cleland did on TV.
Probably the last time I did so, I was coming from North Berwick to Dalkeith at around 1am, I decided that it'd be fun to time myself, coming along the deserted A1 I may have been travelling at "exessive" speed (car flat out, possibly showing an indicated speed similar to a limited German car) when I saw the battenburgs of an emergency vehicle flash by on the other carriage way. Not quite sure what my logic was but I kept going. As I began to near the built up area I slowed down to a slightly more sedate pace, though overtook a car which was doing 45mph in an NSL.
I pulled into Tesco's car park where I was meeting a mate I noticed a police van parked at the door, no worries I thought, I'll park far enough away not to notice me but not so far to look suspicious.
The two officers left the shop and got in to the van, then drove towards me, at this point my arse was twitching like a rabbit's nose.
Sure enough, they stopped beside me and got out. At this point the car was still red hot and it smelled like it too. I could only assume that whatever I'd passed at many leptons had radioed in so thought I was bang to rights.
Turned out that it was the car I'd overtaken that had shopped me in, at which point I'd have "only" been doing 70-80. Luckily all I got was a telling off, told that the smell from the car made it obvious what I had been up to and a warning that the Traffic unit might not be so lenient if they catch me.
Needless to say, lesson learned and I don't really think I've been so stupid since!
Probably the last time I did so, I was coming from North Berwick to Dalkeith at around 1am, I decided that it'd be fun to time myself, coming along the deserted A1 I may have been travelling at "exessive" speed (car flat out, possibly showing an indicated speed similar to a limited German car) when I saw the battenburgs of an emergency vehicle flash by on the other carriage way. Not quite sure what my logic was but I kept going. As I began to near the built up area I slowed down to a slightly more sedate pace, though overtook a car which was doing 45mph in an NSL.
I pulled into Tesco's car park where I was meeting a mate I noticed a police van parked at the door, no worries I thought, I'll park far enough away not to notice me but not so far to look suspicious.
The two officers left the shop and got in to the van, then drove towards me, at this point my arse was twitching like a rabbit's nose.
Sure enough, they stopped beside me and got out. At this point the car was still red hot and it smelled like it too. I could only assume that whatever I'd passed at many leptons had radioed in so thought I was bang to rights.
Turned out that it was the car I'd overtaken that had shopped me in, at which point I'd have "only" been doing 70-80. Luckily all I got was a telling off, told that the smell from the car made it obvious what I had been up to and a warning that the Traffic unit might not be so lenient if they catch me.
Needless to say, lesson learned and I don't really think I've been so stupid since!
While I was at uni, one evening decided to teach my non-driving friend how to drive. So took him and another friend up to the Park & Ride outside Oxford and was getting him moving. Moved on by police for not having insurance for him to drive.
Oxford isn't very car-friendly and I usually took the bus, so coming back from the park and ride I got a bit lost. At one junction the right-turn lights went green and as I went through I realised that it was "buses only" to the right, so swung around and went straight over. The lights for straight over were still red and the police car behind me pulled me as I left the junction. It wasn't the same copper as 20 minutes previously, but they had my registration on record I guess because he knew about it. I explained the situation and he let me on my way, after giving me brief directions home!
Oxford isn't very car-friendly and I usually took the bus, so coming back from the park and ride I got a bit lost. At one junction the right-turn lights went green and as I went through I realised that it was "buses only" to the right, so swung around and went straight over. The lights for straight over were still red and the police car behind me pulled me as I left the junction. It wasn't the same copper as 20 minutes previously, but they had my registration on record I guess because he knew about it. I explained the situation and he let me on my way, after giving me brief directions home!
Coming off the M54 onto the M6 southbound around 1992.
Was doing around 90 around this wide 2 lane slip road onto a busyish M6 and promptly joined the motorway about 3 cars in front of a Police Range Rover!
Plod proceeded to pull me over and gave me a right royal telling off including "If you take a corner like that again, I'll take your licence off you!"
70mph from there on.
Was doing around 90 around this wide 2 lane slip road onto a busyish M6 and promptly joined the motorway about 3 cars in front of a Police Range Rover!
Plod proceeded to pull me over and gave me a right royal telling off including "If you take a corner like that again, I'll take your licence off you!"
70mph from there on.
Terminator X said:
Driving at well over 100 leptons, saw the blue lights behind me and felt immediately queasy! Pulled over and Police car pulled up next to me. Both sets of windows wound down, given a right telling off by the PC at which point they drove off! Made my merry way home at a steady 5mph below all posted limits 
TX.
Surely five 'leptons' below the speed limit... TX.
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