How to change partners bad driving habits
Discussion
Ari said:
I'm talking about the ability to process the fact that crashing four times into the back of other cars indicates a need to change behaviour slightly...
If she's anything like a friend of mine, each time it was someone else's fault. For example, they may have "braked when they shouldn't" such as for an amber light because we all know you accelerate to get through before they go red............... Personally, I just refuse to get in the car with someone like that, I don't care if it upsets them, I prefer to still be alive when I get to my destination.
In my experience bad habits are the hardest of all things to change. I have some, and so does everybody else. If you suggest change they will refuse to, as they don't see anything wrong with what they're doing.
Everyone is like this.
As others said I'd try the 'drive like they do' approach and see what reaction you get. React exactly the same as her to criticism, and see if that makes her see her own driving from a passengers point of view. I'm a better driver than I used to be, because I started to criticise my driving as if I was a passenger in my own car. Once you make her see how she really drives, as opposed to how she thinks she drives, there should be an improvement.
Everyone is like this.
As others said I'd try the 'drive like they do' approach and see what reaction you get. React exactly the same as her to criticism, and see if that makes her see her own driving from a passengers point of view. I'm a better driver than I used to be, because I started to criticise my driving as if I was a passenger in my own car. Once you make her see how she really drives, as opposed to how she thinks she drives, there should be an improvement.
R0G said:
Never criticise
Give a running commentary such as - WE (not you) are now within the 2 second safety gap
Jesus Christ, you are an utter horror.Give a running commentary such as - WE (not you) are now within the 2 second safety gap
I bet your marriage is an absolute barrel of laughs.
I can picture mealtimes in your house:
ROG(in a horrifically nasal voice): Marge, dear, we don't want to overcook the broccoli do we? I suggest we maintain an exact temperature of ninety seven degrees
Poorwife: Rog, why don't you just cook?
ROG: We must maintain our customs, dear, Ive told you this. We could probably do with basting the chicken a little don't you think?
Poorwife: Sigh. Yes dear
ROG: You're a clever thing aren't you?
Later that night:
Rog: Thats nice love. I think we established that 37 strokes per minute is about right. Just enough to last the appropriate amount of time without appearing too eager
Poorwife: ROg, I don't mind. 160 per minute would be fine, dear.
Rog: Didn't WE discuss this before?
Condi said:
Ari said:
This is going to sound really awful so I apologise in advance, but everything you describe (including replicating behaviour that has caused accidents in the past) smacks of low intelligence.
People of average intelligence or better can usually work out the consequence of the driving you describe.
If that is the issue, then you're never going to change it because the mental capacity to understand the reason for change is lacking.
Sorry to be so blunt, I don't mean to be rude, but in my experience people who drive badly due to inability to work through the consequences will never ever change because they will never ever understand the need to (even if they crash, which will somehow be either someone else's fault, or the car's fault for 'not stopping quickly enough' or mysteriously 'going out of control').
Are all your 10,000 posts as retarded as this one?! People of average intelligence or better can usually work out the consequence of the driving you describe.
If that is the issue, then you're never going to change it because the mental capacity to understand the reason for change is lacking.
Sorry to be so blunt, I don't mean to be rude, but in my experience people who drive badly due to inability to work through the consequences will never ever change because they will never ever understand the need to (even if they crash, which will somehow be either someone else's fault, or the car's fault for 'not stopping quickly enough' or mysteriously 'going out of control').
blindswelledrat said:
Jesus Christ, you are an utter horror.
I bet your marriage is an absolute barrel of laughs.
I can picture mealtimes in your house:
ROG(in a horrifically nasal voice): Marge, dear, we don't want to overcook the broccoli do we? I suggest we maintain an exact temperature of ninety seven degrees
Poorwife: Rog, why don't you just cook?
ROG: We must maintain our customs, dear, Ive told you this. We could probably do with basting the chicken a little don't you think?
Poorwife: Sigh. Yes dear
ROG: You're a clever thing aren't you?
Later that night:
Rog: Thats nice love. I think we established that 37 strokes per minute is about right. Just enough to last the appropriate amount of time without appearing too eager
Poorwife: ROg, I don't mind. 160 per minute would be fine, dear.
Rog: Didn't WE discuss this before?
Funny - nowhere near reality but funny LOLI bet your marriage is an absolute barrel of laughs.
I can picture mealtimes in your house:
ROG(in a horrifically nasal voice): Marge, dear, we don't want to overcook the broccoli do we? I suggest we maintain an exact temperature of ninety seven degrees
Poorwife: Rog, why don't you just cook?
ROG: We must maintain our customs, dear, Ive told you this. We could probably do with basting the chicken a little don't you think?
Poorwife: Sigh. Yes dear
ROG: You're a clever thing aren't you?
Later that night:
Rog: Thats nice love. I think we established that 37 strokes per minute is about right. Just enough to last the appropriate amount of time without appearing too eager
Poorwife: ROg, I don't mind. 160 per minute would be fine, dear.
Rog: Didn't WE discuss this before?
One of my ex-girlfriends had two really annoying driving habits.
1) She would move her hands all over the cabin in some sort of weird "can't keep my hands still" OCD - she'd rest her hand on the gearstick, then move it to the arm rest, then the steering wheel, then the gearstick again, then the handbrake, then the armrest, etc. etc.
I could deal with that, but every time she rested on the handbrake, she would wrap her hand around it and every time it looked like she was about to yank the handbrake up.
2) She would look at me constantly while driving. I don't mean just glances either, she'd stare at me for a good couple of seconds at a time, eyes off the road completely.
I couldn't do much about the first point, but for the second point I managed to cure her by flicking her hazard lights on every time she looked at me. It didn't take long before she got the message.
1) She would move her hands all over the cabin in some sort of weird "can't keep my hands still" OCD - she'd rest her hand on the gearstick, then move it to the arm rest, then the steering wheel, then the gearstick again, then the handbrake, then the armrest, etc. etc.
I could deal with that, but every time she rested on the handbrake, she would wrap her hand around it and every time it looked like she was about to yank the handbrake up.
2) She would look at me constantly while driving. I don't mean just glances either, she'd stare at me for a good couple of seconds at a time, eyes off the road completely.
I couldn't do much about the first point, but for the second point I managed to cure her by flicking her hazard lights on every time she looked at me. It didn't take long before she got the message.
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