One single thing that makes you think "knob" Vol 3

[kowalski655]

K321 said:

people with B055 in their numberplates

Aston Martin drivers with 007 in their plate.
Or more likely O07

[joebongo]

The dodderers who stopped on a country road to talk to someone with a pushchair which between them took up the whole width of the lane. Pushchair man could see me coming for about a mile and a half, a long straight road so say 6 minutes, and so could said dodderers if they ever looked in their mirrors, any mirror would have done the job. I was cycling in hi-vis and hard to mistake for a pigeon. So only when I have to come to a complete halt does dodderer glance in his mirror, slowly move to the right hand side of the lane without indication at which point I am to assume that he intends for me to pass him on the left.

fking nobwittery of the highest order. I can't imagine stopping in a road, blocking it to traffic and not keeping a close eye on whether I was causing an obstruction to others.

[ORD]

9mm said:

My approach in that situation would be to lean on the horn until the owner appeared. Fecked if I'd be going house to house knocking on doors trying to find out who it is. Or if it was seriously late they'd find themselves blocked in for the night. People wrongly parked who say "you only have to ask and I'll move it" are knobs.

So wake the whole street because one person has hurt your feelings? That would make you a total fecker.

[masermartin]

Blown2CV said:

you didn't say whether it was an angry telling-off honk or a i'm here watch out honk. If it was the latter you could argue this situation is exactly what horns are for. I have that many people walk out on me when i am in the manchester city centre part of my commute that i tend to do this quite a lot. It quite often gets met with angry defensiveness though as they interpret it as aggression.

True, to a point, but even assuming I hadn't seen him, our paths would not have crossed and there was no need for him to bring himself to my attention, unless he thought I was in fact going to teleport 5 metres to appear in front of him.

[masermartin]

ORD said:

So wake the whole street because one person has hurt your feelings? That would make you a total fecker.

If you're expecting him to go door to door knocking to find the culprit, he's going to do exactly that, only it'll take half an hour. </devilsadvocate>

[9mm]

masermartin said:

ORD said:

So wake the whole street because one person has hurt your feelings? That would make you a total fecker.

If you're expecting him to go door to door knocking to find the culprit, he's going to do exactly that, only it'll take half an hour. </devilsadvocate>

Thanks for pointing that out. Some people need to think things through before they post.

[getawayturtle]

There isn't much that makes me think "knob" more than someone seeing this:

And deciding to do this to it..



Cul-de-sac, public spaces, no driveway, so probably a cowardly neighbour with some parking gripe. All the way down the rear quarter panel. Lovely.

[Liquid Knight]

People who say...

Moron said:

It's only banter.

...just before their face is about to be turned inside out after delivering a derogatory insult.

[TheAllSeeingPie]

getawayturtle said:

Cul-de-sac, public spaces, no driveway, so probably a cowardly neighbour with some parking gripe. All the way down the rear quarter panel. Lovely.

Also looks like it could have been a kids bike, although not sure how it would happen from that angle.

[Mandalore]

masermartin said:

ORD said:

So wake the whole street because one person has hurt your feelings? That would make you a total fecker.

If you're expecting him to go door to door knocking to find the culprit, he's going to do exactly that, only it'll take half an hour. </devilsadvocate>

Indeed!

I appreciate that some people are scared of confrontation, even when they are fully in the right, but if you took the time to actually look and observe the people who park inconsiderately when they return to their cars, they are very-very rarely a 7ft tall axe murderer on the run from prison.


Also, you will probably be please to know, that there are no monsters hiding under your bed.

[CorvetteConvert]

Having an exhaust the size of a polar bear's waist on a 20 year old Corsa 1.0

[ORD]

Mandalore said:

masermartin said:

ORD said:

So wake the whole street because one person has hurt your feelings? That would make you a total fecker.

If you're expecting him to go door to door knocking to find the culprit, he's going to do exactly that, only it'll take half an hour. </devilsadvocate>

Indeed!

I appreciate that some people are scared of confrontation, even when they are fully in the right, but if you took the time to actually look and observe the people who park inconsiderately when they return to their cars, they are very-very rarely a 7ft tall axe murderer on the run from prison.


Also, you will probably be please to know, that there are no monsters hiding under your bed.

Let me explain.
(1) You can simply park elsewhere for the night like a grown up.
(2) If you lean on your horn late at night because your feelings are hurt, you will quickly have someone like me (tired father of a young baby) out of his house to beat you to death with your shoes.

Waking everyone up because your parking space is full is the behaviour of a spoiled toddler. Toys out of pram and don't care about the consequences for anyone else.

A taxi driver recently started hooting at 10pm because the punter was slow to come out. 3 parents from our road descended on his car within 2 mins. He looked genuinely confused why he was being told off!

[Ghost91]

The twunt on the M1 last night who slammed his brakes on Infront of me while passing an 'average speed' camera.

He then sped off until the next camera where he slammed on the brakes again.

Are people really this stupid?

[masermartin]

Ghost91 said:

Are people really this stupid?

Yes

[Ghost91]

masermartin said:

Yes

I see it so often I'm starting to think perhaps they're in on something that I'm not...

[TheAllSeeingPie]

ORD said:

A taxi driver recently started hooting at 10pm because the punter was slow to come out. 3 parents from our road descended on his car within 2 mins. He looked genuinely confused why he was being told off!

We get this a lot on our street, same taxi driver for the same house so assuming they are friends rather than clients of his. Fortunately I got his license number and have had a word with the licensing board after the taxi company told me to do one after I complained. I would have had a quiet word with the guy who lives on my street but he's a weapons grade twunt who shouts at his kids in english but if you try and talk to him pretends he doesn't speak a word of the language and gets his 11 year old son to talk to you instead.

[3xpendable]

The tt in the 15 plate Jaguar XF yesterday in Winchcombe. I was following them down a public singe track road with passing places and the car was dithering around then suddenly braked and pulled over (ish) right at the end of a passing place and sat there for about 20 seconds before putting the indicator on. so I then had to squeeze by and to my astonishment I looked across and saw a KID in the drivers seat. I kid you not, he can't have been more than 10 and as I looked across the dad in the passenger seat tried to push his head down out of view. If only I'd got it on camera I'd have reported the car.

[WD39]

TheAllSeeingPie said:

ORD said:

A taxi driver recently started hooting at 10pm because the punter was slow to come out. 3 parents from our road descended on his car within 2 mins. He looked genuinely confused why he was being told off!

We get this a lot on our street, same taxi driver for the same house so assuming they are friends rather than clients of his. Fortunately I got his license number and have had a word with the licensing board after the taxi company told me to do one after I complained. I would have had a quiet word with the guy who lives on my street but he's a weapons grade twunt who shouts at his kids in english but if you try and talk to him pretends he doesn't speak a word of the language and gets his 11 year old son to talk to you instead.

There is, I believe, a new Highway Code for taxi drivers.
On each page is printed 'Intentionally left blank'.

[masermartin]

3xpendable said:

The tt in the 15 plate Jaguar XF yesterday in Winchcombe. I was following them down a public singe track road with passing places and the car was dithering around then suddenly braked and pulled over (ish) right at the end of a passing place and sat there for about 20 seconds before putting the indicator on. so I then had to squeeze by and to my astonishment I looked across and saw a KID in the drivers seat. I kid you not, he can't have been more than 10 and as I looked across the dad in the passenger seat tried to push his head down out of view. If only I'd got it on camera I'd have reported the car.

[mistakenplane]

The young lady who failed to let me merge onto the A11 yesterday because she was preoccupied with some sort of bag of food in her lap.

I pull on behind her and overtake as shes well below 70. A few mins later she pulls into Lane 2 and sits there for ages slowly catching me up, but rather than pass she sits just behind my rear corner before falling back away again never to be seen.

Id be more angry but she was pretty and I was thinking of proposing to her.

putonghua73 said:

Not content with that mistake, I made another mis-judgement closer to where I live. I thought a bus had stopped at a bus stop, and from checking that there were no vehicles approaching in the oncoming lane, mirror checked, signalled, and performed my manoeuvre. To my embarrassment I discovered that the bus hadn't actually stopped at the bus stop, but was in a queue waiting for the lights to change. Thus, I had to mirror check, signal, grovel re: flash hazard lights when let back into my original position.

Arriving home, I realised that I had forgotten to take any shopping bags with me, so had to immediately jump back in after collecting some shopping bags, to drive to the supermarket. Fortunately. this small trip was uneventful.

I did similar, came up behind a bus indicating so pulled behind it and flashed it out. Sat and it didnt move so I got a bit pissed off, then a car behind pulled out and shot off.

My missus then says "you know its parked right?" and I look over to see the indicators are actually the hazards on and its parked up. Sheepishly I pull around it. What a plum!

And the amount of times in a previous job I drove up to Tesco, shopped, went to the till and realised I left my wallet in the office and had to do a big round trip would make you wonder for my sanity.