One single thing that makes you think "knob" Vol 3

[deltashad]

Hol said:

Liquid Knight said:

Instant Kama on the way to work last night. I had stopped at a box junction and the Jaguar XF driver behind blasted his horn, revved the engine and as soon as there was a gap bombarded past me into the box at a forty five degree angle. Much to the amusement of the driver and passenger of the Police car sat waiting to enter the box from a side road. As soon as the traffic lights changed the blues and twos came on and Mr Jaaaagggg' was stopped a couple of hundred yards later.

I alway like a story with a happy ending.

Always go for the happy ending.

But seriously, you've probably seen it but 'lane hogger gets comeuppance' on youtube gets me giggling everytime I watch it.

[JimbobVFR]

Bluedot said:

carlove said:

A woman in an obese Nissan Almera, pulled out without looking when I was very close, I beeped and she stopped dead right in front of me and put her hand over her mouth, I was already having to brake hard so actually getting out of my way would be better than stopping. She did apologise and was obviously a mistake. It was at a point where most people turn left but I don't, I go straight, so she assumed she'd be safe, maybe she'll look next time.

It's such a rarity these days for other drivers to apologise even when they're in the wrong.
She made a mistake and she apologised, I don't see any problem with that.

I've done the same but I have to ask what purpose the horn served, if its that close the Almera can either carry on as it was or stop when the horn makes them panic. Additionally it could be argued if you had time for the horn it wasn't that close.

[Europa1]

Most days, I put up with Annoying Things People Do On Trains (http://www.pistonheads.com/gassing/topic.asp?t=1559084 ) on the way to work.

This morning I drove for a change, which revealed far more than one single thing that made me think "knob". A few of the mentally challenged from this morning:
- cyclist, no lights, dark clothing, cutting junction as he turned into a side road. This was at 6:50am.
- f%^ktards who don't use deceleration lanes but slow down in the main road until they are alongside the turning, then turn off.
- the cockwombles who brake to 10mph under the speed limit going past speed cameras.
- the f&*ktrumpets who can't maintaon a constant speed.

[burritoNinja]

Self proclaimed car "experts" who can diagnose a car from 30ft away with the engine just starting up.

[romeogolf]

Europa1 said:

- the cockwombles who brake to 10mph under the speed limit going past speed cameras.
- the f&*ktrumpets who can't maintaon a constant speed.

You notice these things so much more using cruise control. I appreciate up/down hills you're going to fluctuate speed without cruise, but on a flat surface more than a few mph is just a lack of attention.

And for speed cameras... ugh.

[WD39]

ashleyman said:

When my neighbours are too lazy to drive their cars into their own marked up spaces and garages but instead leave them all parked up in the visitors bays just because they're closer to the building front door.

This drives me insane. It also breaches the management terms. Petty I know but oh well.

No, not petty at all. There is a Victor Meldrew in all of us, given the right, or wrong, situation.

[anonymous-user]

The lorry driver who decided to be the morals police and block the outside lane on the duel carrige way, as I'm slowly trundling down it. It's a merge at the end, just because you want to sit in the inside lane doesn't mean we all want to.

I'm not sure if it was not knowing how merge lanes work or you just wanting to act like a penis.. Hopefully the later as all the truck drivers I know swear on there lives that they are the best and most knowledgeable drivers on the road

[dalzo]

The man who despite a full empty row either side of me and in front of me decided to plank his arse down right in front of me at the pictures the other night,while sitting himself devouring chicken nuggets.

A full blown weirdo of the highest order, had to laugh when he done it

[Europa1]

AB57 said:

The lorry driver who decided to be the morals police and block the outside lane on the duel carrige way, as I'm slowly trundling down it.

Were you using swords or pistols? Did you send your second to have a word with the lorry driver?

[WD39]

AB57 said:

The lorry driver who decided to be the morals police and block the outside lane on the duel carrige way, as I'm slowly trundling down it. It's a merge at the end, just because you want to sit in the inside lane doesn't mean we all want to.

I'm not sure if it was not knowing how merge lanes work or you just wanting to act like a penis.. Hopefully the later as all the truck drivers I know swear on there lives that they are the best and most knowledgeable drivers on the road

It suddenly came to me recently as I was in a queue that was not as orderly as we would like. Several people came up to the line of people to politely enquire 'Is this the end?' or 'Are you queueing for...?', before taking their place at the back.

That's it! I thought, that is merge in turn in an everyday situation. British people like to queue properly.

So when you see a queue of cars in the left hand lane, before two lanes meet into one and someone, the lorry driver in this case, is saying, in effect, Oi! driver, NO!, get to the back!

It's what we British love to do.

I have travelled the world extensively and we are the only race that does it in an orderly fashion. In many countries it seems like a bunfight to get to the front.

So the next time you are in a merge situation and it is a bit slow or you are blocked from gaining ground in the right hand lane, just remember, it's just being British.

Rule Brittania.

[mikefacel]

WD39 said:

It suddenly came to me recently as I was in a queue that was not as orderly as we would like. Several people came up to the line of people to politely enquire 'Is this the end?' or 'Are you queueing for...?', before taking their place at the back.

That's it! I thought, that is merge in turn in an everyday situation. British people like to queue properly.

So when you see a queue of cars in the left hand lane, before two lanes meet into one and someone, the lorry driver in this case, is saying, in effect, Oi! driver, NO!, get to the back!

It's what we British love to do.

I have travelled the world extensively and we are the only race that does it in an orderly fashion. In many countries it seems like a bunfight to get to the front.

So the next time you are in a merge situation and it is a bit slow or you are blocked from gaining ground in the right hand lane, just remember, it's just being British.

Rule Brittania.

They have a good system in Spain: If you enter a waiting room for the doctor or bank or whatever, they will ask "Quien es el ultimo?" ("who is last"?). They then know where they are in the queue and only have to keep an eye on that person to know when it's their turn. Doesn't work for public transport of course.

[jogger1976]

Whoever signed off the road closures in Watford while the new Health Campus link road is being built.

I've just spent nearly 2 hours trying to get from South Oxhey to the M1. A journey that should probably take about 30 minutes. The journey was also not helped by the fact that there is a fking traffic light what seems like every two poxy feet.

Also, what sort of drugs was the traffic engineer on when he programmed the bloody phasing? 20 seconds of green and five plus minutes on red.WTF?

[Mustang87]

AB57 said:

The lorry driver who decided to be the morals police and block the outside lane on the duel carrige way, as I'm slowly trundling down it. It's a merge at the end, just because you want to sit in the inside lane doesn't mean we all want to.

I'm not sure if it was not knowing how merge lanes work or you just wanting to act like a penis.. Hopefully the later as all the truck drivers I know swear on there lives that they are the best and most knowledgeable drivers on the road

I saw this for the first time a few weeks ago. Three lanes merging into one at the scene of an accident, and a couple of HGVs positioned themselves between the second and third lanes, straddling the lines. Knights of the road.

[carlove]

JimbobVFR said:

I've done the same but I have to ask what purpose the horn served, if its that close the Almera can either carry on as it was or stop when the horn makes them panic. Additionally it could be argued if you had time for the horn it wasn't that close.

I gave one quick honk of the horn when I saw her start to come out, before she crossed the give way line, I also started braking at the same time as using the horn. I had to come to a complete stop and as said there was shock on her face(probably mine also) which was another indication it was quite close. She reacted to the horn but too late, it was my reactions that prevented an accident.

I appreciate the apology as nobody does it anymore but I think when you take the risk of just pulling out without looking you're a knob.

[Jim AK]

The member of our staff that had a puncture in the leased Mini that went back today, minus the tyre inflator.

Transpires the halfwit left it by the side of the road after a puncture but kept the empty gloop bottle!!

Knob of the highest order.

[Hol]

Europa1 said:

AB57 said:

The lorry driver who decided to be the morals police and block the outside lane on the duel carrige way, as I'm slowly trundling down it.

Were you using swords or pistols? Did you send your second to have a word with the lorry driver?

Strangely, some stories actually make more sense if it was a carriageway intended specifically for duels.

[Hol]

WD39 said:

AB57 said:

The lorry driver who decided to be the morals police and block the outside lane on the duel carrige way, as I'm slowly trundling down it. It's a merge at the end, just because you want to sit in the inside lane doesn't mean we all want to.

I'm not sure if it was not knowing how merge lanes work or you just wanting to act like a penis.. Hopefully the later as all the truck drivers I know swear on there lives that they are the best and most knowledgeable drivers on the road

It suddenly came to me recently as I was in a queue that was not as orderly as we would like. Several people came up to the line of people to politely enquire 'Is this the end?' or 'Are you queueing for...?', before taking their place at the back.

That's it! I thought, that is merge in turn in an everyday situation. British people like to queue properly.

So when you see a queue of cars in the left hand lane, before two lanes meet into one and someone, the lorry driver in this case, is saying, in effect, Oi! driver, NO!, get to the back!

It's what we British love to do.

I have travelled the world extensively and we are the only race that does it in an orderly fashion. In many countries it seems like a bunfight to get to the front.

So the next time you are in a merge situation and it is a bit slow or you are blocked from gaining ground in the right hand lane, just remember, it's just being British.

Rule Brittania.

Strange, as people like the lorry driver reminded me of those weird people on a Bus, Train or Plane who try to get the exits early long before the stop and position their body, so as not to let anyone else on the train pass them. Its almost like their lives depend on it!!

Unbelievably, they are never in a hurry when they do get off.


I often wonder if they drive like that??

[Issi]

Yoofs who drive around with their hoods up, often seen with the hood over a baseball cap, and always seem to be driving a 'stanced' 15 yr old Golf or fiesta.

[romeogolf]

VW Passat who super-glued himself to the bumper of the Peugeot ahead of him this morning on the A31. Heavy traffic, stream of cars merging on from the A338 junction. But no one in front of him until Peugeot stopped paying attention and left a gap, then shot forward to catch up. I merged in behind and to a strong blast of the horn from Passat who then swung left into the exit slip for Ringwood and raced off to merge in a few cars further up.

[Krikkit]

A classic one for this thread this morning around the Lincoln ring-road - a woman in a Hyundai i30 who was so intent on moving up the traffic queue that she frequently cut people off and drove on the wrong side of the road, all to move up 3 cars.

Her rear view mirror looked a little odd, on closer inspection it was tilted like a make-up mirror to show her how she looked, no view of the road at all.

Once we got onto a dual carriageway (again being a dick in the split to two lanes and cutting people up) she proceeded to drive along at 65mph and be overtaken by half the folk she had barged past! As I passed her she was staring at the dash, one palm on the wheel, 3 CDs stuck on the fingers of her hand... Obviously a dual carriageway is the ideal time to sort out your CD changer.

Oh, and a "BABY IN CAR" sticker in the rear window and a young sprog in a seat in the back. Knob.