One single thing that makes you think "knob" Vol 3
Discussion
The knobby knobhead yesterday who beeped at me, several times, for waiting 30 yards back from a give way line.
What's that? "You're the knob!" I hear you cry?
For clarity...
Ahead and to my left is a Waitrose articulated fridge truck. He's waiting (and clearly signalling) to turn left, and has priority. But he can't swing around because two idiots on opposite sides of a cross-road are having a 'Mexican stand-off' despite the fact that they're both going straight over.
I can see the wagon driver gesturing to them to get out of his way, and I know he'll need all of my lane at the give way line to get the truck around the corner without crashing the footway and the bollards on the corner to persuade him not to cut it. Which is why I'm waiting where I am.
Eventually the two clowns ahead agree to move, and the trucker looks at me, I give him a 'thumb up' to confirm I'm not about to do anything stupid, and he begins his turn. Well Mr Knobhead behind me has already tooted twice by this point. But as the truck looms large in BOTH lanes ahead, the fool behind me loses patience and floors it round me. Followed immediately, of course, by him coming to an equally rapid stop, and then reversing back to where he started from. That was the cue for some shoulder shrugging between me and the truck driver, before he straightened up and we all got on with our lives, which must have been all of 90 seconds of delay.
What made the Astra ('window cleaner spec' old Astra estate) driver even more of a knob was the fact that he tailgated me all the way out of town, moving left and right despite there being no obvious overtake on in busy traffic. Then we got onto a twisty road up and away from town, where he tried so 'set' for an overtake well before the NSL signs. I was studiously obeying the 40mph limit right up to the signs, and he was prevented from overtaking by oncoming traffic. He was 'dropping a gear', revving it with the clutch in, and flashing his high beams at me. I was hugely entertained by it all, then briskly accelerated to 60mph, and put some space between us. Initially he started to catch up, but a few twists and turns without recourse to the brakes soon had him re-assessing his talent/ambition ratio. He fell back pretty quickly from then on, and I was deprived of the opportunity for any further entertainment.
What's that? "You're the knob!" I hear you cry?
For clarity...
Ahead and to my left is a Waitrose articulated fridge truck. He's waiting (and clearly signalling) to turn left, and has priority. But he can't swing around because two idiots on opposite sides of a cross-road are having a 'Mexican stand-off' despite the fact that they're both going straight over.
I can see the wagon driver gesturing to them to get out of his way, and I know he'll need all of my lane at the give way line to get the truck around the corner without crashing the footway and the bollards on the corner to persuade him not to cut it. Which is why I'm waiting where I am.
Eventually the two clowns ahead agree to move, and the trucker looks at me, I give him a 'thumb up' to confirm I'm not about to do anything stupid, and he begins his turn. Well Mr Knobhead behind me has already tooted twice by this point. But as the truck looms large in BOTH lanes ahead, the fool behind me loses patience and floors it round me. Followed immediately, of course, by him coming to an equally rapid stop, and then reversing back to where he started from. That was the cue for some shoulder shrugging between me and the truck driver, before he straightened up and we all got on with our lives, which must have been all of 90 seconds of delay.
What made the Astra ('window cleaner spec' old Astra estate) driver even more of a knob was the fact that he tailgated me all the way out of town, moving left and right despite there being no obvious overtake on in busy traffic. Then we got onto a twisty road up and away from town, where he tried so 'set' for an overtake well before the NSL signs. I was studiously obeying the 40mph limit right up to the signs, and he was prevented from overtaking by oncoming traffic. He was 'dropping a gear', revving it with the clutch in, and flashing his high beams at me. I was hugely entertained by it all, then briskly accelerated to 60mph, and put some space between us. Initially he started to catch up, but a few twists and turns without recourse to the brakes soon had him re-assessing his talent/ambition ratio. He fell back pretty quickly from then on, and I was deprived of the opportunity for any further entertainment.
Speaking of knobs in petrol stations, those who rather than join a queue for a pump will wait at the entrance to the forecourt for one to become available - causing delays to the people behind and occasionally the main road. Seriously that's happened before, massive queues on the main road because of these people.
Sometimes I'll go round them and join a queue properly and most of the time I'll be out quicker anyway
Edited for autocorrect
Sometimes I'll go round them and join a queue properly and most of the time I'll be out quicker anyway
Edited for autocorrect
Jbeale96 said:
Speaking of knobs in petrol stations, those who rather than join a queue for a pump will wait at the entrance to the forecourt for one to become available - causing delays to the people behind and occasionally the main road. Seriously that's happened before, massive queues on the main road because of these people.
Sometimes I'll go round them and join a queue properly and most of the time I'll be out quicker anyway
Edited for autocorrect
Yep, not infrequent at the Sainsbury's petrol station in Cambridge - even since they rebuilt with improved access and pump hoses that reach both sides. Sometimes I'll go round them and join a queue properly and most of the time I'll be out quicker anyway
Edited for autocorrect
Jbeale96 said:
Speaking of knobs in petrol stations, those who rather than join a queue for a pump will wait at the entrance to the forecourt for one to become available - causing delays to the people behind and occasionally the main road. Seriously that's happened before, massive queues on the main road because of these people.
Sometimes I'll go round them and join a queue properly and most of the time I'll be out quicker anyway
Edited for autocorrect
In the past I have got out and asked (politely I must say) the person at the front to please select a pump rather than sitting in the entrance where the queue is backing up into the road. Sometimes I'll go round them and join a queue properly and most of the time I'll be out quicker anyway
Edited for autocorrect
Join a queue at a pump, sometimes you win and go through quickly, sometimes you lose and sit there a touch longer. What it does save is everyone losing by sitting out in the road and causing a blockage.
yellowjack said:
The knobby knobhead yesterday who beeped at me, several times, for waiting 30 yards back from a give way line.
What's that? "You're the knob!" I hear you cry?
For clarity...
Ahead and to my left is a Waitrose articulated fridge truck. He's waiting (and clearly signalling) to turn left, and has priority. But he can't swing around because two idiots on opposite sides of a cross-road are having a 'Mexican stand-off' despite the fact that they're both going straight over.
I can see the wagon driver gesturing to them to get out of his way, and I know he'll need all of my lane at the give way line to get the truck around the corner without crashing the footway and the bollards on the corner to persuade him not to cut it. Which is why I'm waiting where I am.
Eventually the two clowns ahead agree to move, and the trucker looks at me, I give him a 'thumb up' to confirm I'm not about to do anything stupid, and he begins his turn. Well Mr Knobhead behind me has already tooted twice by this point. But as the truck looms large in BOTH lanes ahead, the fool behind me loses patience and floors it round me. Followed immediately, of course, by him coming to an equally rapid stop, and then reversing back to where he started from. That was the cue for some shoulder shrugging between me and the truck driver, before he straightened up and we all got on with our lives, which must have been all of 90 seconds of delay.
What made the Astra ('window cleaner spec' old Astra estate) driver even more of a knob was the fact that he tailgated me all the way out of town, moving left and right despite there being no obvious overtake on in busy traffic. Then we got onto a twisty road up and away from town, where he tried so 'set' for an overtake well before the NSL signs. I was studiously obeying the 40mph limit right up to the signs, and he was prevented from overtaking by oncoming traffic. He was 'dropping a gear', revving it with the clutch in, and flashing his high beams at me. I was hugely entertained by it all, then briskly accelerated to 60mph, and put some space between us. Initially he started to catch up, but a few twists and turns without recourse to the brakes soon had him re-assessing his talent/ambition ratio. He fell back pretty quickly from then on, and I was deprived of the opportunity for any further entertainment.
CSI PHWhat's that? "You're the knob!" I hear you cry?
For clarity...
Ahead and to my left is a Waitrose articulated fridge truck. He's waiting (and clearly signalling) to turn left, and has priority. But he can't swing around because two idiots on opposite sides of a cross-road are having a 'Mexican stand-off' despite the fact that they're both going straight over.
I can see the wagon driver gesturing to them to get out of his way, and I know he'll need all of my lane at the give way line to get the truck around the corner without crashing the footway and the bollards on the corner to persuade him not to cut it. Which is why I'm waiting where I am.
Eventually the two clowns ahead agree to move, and the trucker looks at me, I give him a 'thumb up' to confirm I'm not about to do anything stupid, and he begins his turn. Well Mr Knobhead behind me has already tooted twice by this point. But as the truck looms large in BOTH lanes ahead, the fool behind me loses patience and floors it round me. Followed immediately, of course, by him coming to an equally rapid stop, and then reversing back to where he started from. That was the cue for some shoulder shrugging between me and the truck driver, before he straightened up and we all got on with our lives, which must have been all of 90 seconds of delay.
What made the Astra ('window cleaner spec' old Astra estate) driver even more of a knob was the fact that he tailgated me all the way out of town, moving left and right despite there being no obvious overtake on in busy traffic. Then we got onto a twisty road up and away from town, where he tried so 'set' for an overtake well before the NSL signs. I was studiously obeying the 40mph limit right up to the signs, and he was prevented from overtaking by oncoming traffic. He was 'dropping a gear', revving it with the clutch in, and flashing his high beams at me. I was hugely entertained by it all, then briskly accelerated to 60mph, and put some space between us. Initially he started to catch up, but a few twists and turns without recourse to the brakes soon had him re-assessing his talent/ambition ratio. He fell back pretty quickly from then on, and I was deprived of the opportunity for any further entertainment.
Edited by nonsequitur on Tuesday 14th February 21:31
Edited by nonsequitur on Tuesday 14th February 21:47
nonsequitur said:
CSI PH
Have you been drinking sir? Being drunk in charge of a keyboard is a VERY serious offence. Edited by nonsequitur on Tuesday 14th February 21:31
Edited by nonsequitur on Tuesday 14th February 21:47
Did it really take you two edits to get that post looking as you wanted it to..?
Jbeale96 said:
Speaking of knobs in petrol stations, those who rather than join a queue for a pump will wait at the entrance to the forecourt for one to become available - causing delays to the people behind and occasionally the main road. Seriously that's happened before, massive queues on the main road because of these people.
Sometimes I'll go round them and join a queue properly and most of the time I'll be out quicker anyway
Edited for autocorrect
Hate that. What annoys me the most though is when people try to get into a petrol station when its 'full' forcing everyone on the main road to get caught behind them. Can't quite work out if they are selfish or just plain stupid..Sometimes I'll go round them and join a queue properly and most of the time I'll be out quicker anyway
Edited for autocorrect
yellowjack said:
nonsequitur said:
CSI PH
Have you been drinking sir? Being drunk in charge of a keyboard is a VERY serious offence. Edited by nonsequitur on Tuesday 14th February 21:31
Edited by nonsequitur on Tuesday 14th February 21:47
Did it really take you two edits to get that post looking as you wanted it to..?
Succinct is the word.
And as for criticising the style of a PH post, well I never...
At a loose end?
yellowjack said:
The knobby knobhead yesterday who beeped at me, several times, for waiting 30 yards back from a give way line.
What's that? "You're the knob!" I hear you cry?
For clarity...
Ahead and to my left is a Waitrose articulated fridge truck. He's waiting (and clearly signalling) to turn left, and has priority. But he can't swing around because two idiots on opposite sides of a cross-road are having a 'Mexican stand-off' despite the fact that they're both going straight over.
I can see the wagon driver gesturing to them to get out of his way, and I know he'll need all of my lane at the give way line to get the truck around the corner without crashing the footway and the bollards on the corner to persuade him not to cut it. Which is why I'm waiting where I am.
Eventually the two clowns ahead agree to move, and the trucker looks at me, I give him a 'thumb up' to confirm I'm not about to do anything stupid, and he begins his turn. Well Mr Knobhead behind me has already tooted twice by this point. But as the truck looms large in BOTH lanes ahead, the fool behind me loses patience and floors it round me. Followed immediately, of course, by him coming to an equally rapid stop, and then reversing back to where he started from. That was the cue for some shoulder shrugging between me and the truck driver, before he straightened up and we all got on with our lives, which must have been all of 90 seconds of delay.
What made the Astra ('window cleaner spec' old Astra estate) driver even more of a knob was the fact that he tailgated me all the way out of town, moving left and right despite there being no obvious overtake on in busy traffic. Then we got onto a twisty road up and away from town, where he tried so 'set' for an overtake well before the NSL signs. I was studiously obeying the 40mph limit right up to the signs, and he was prevented from overtaking by oncoming traffic. He was 'dropping a gear', revving it with the clutch in, and flashing his high beams at me. I was hugely entertained by it all, then briskly accelerated to 60mph, and put some space between us. Initially he started to catch up, but a few twists and turns without recourse to the brakes soon had him re-assessing his talent/ambition ratio. He fell back pretty quickly from then on, and I was deprived of the opportunity for any further entertainment.
Similar encounter with an impatient knob yesterday. I was following a bus down country lanes, I know them well and there are no safe stretches to attempt an overtake. A bit of a queue built up behind including an angry looking man (in an Astra as it happens) who decided to tailgate me for some reason.What's that? "You're the knob!" I hear you cry?
For clarity...
Ahead and to my left is a Waitrose articulated fridge truck. He's waiting (and clearly signalling) to turn left, and has priority. But he can't swing around because two idiots on opposite sides of a cross-road are having a 'Mexican stand-off' despite the fact that they're both going straight over.
I can see the wagon driver gesturing to them to get out of his way, and I know he'll need all of my lane at the give way line to get the truck around the corner without crashing the footway and the bollards on the corner to persuade him not to cut it. Which is why I'm waiting where I am.
Eventually the two clowns ahead agree to move, and the trucker looks at me, I give him a 'thumb up' to confirm I'm not about to do anything stupid, and he begins his turn. Well Mr Knobhead behind me has already tooted twice by this point. But as the truck looms large in BOTH lanes ahead, the fool behind me loses patience and floors it round me. Followed immediately, of course, by him coming to an equally rapid stop, and then reversing back to where he started from. That was the cue for some shoulder shrugging between me and the truck driver, before he straightened up and we all got on with our lives, which must have been all of 90 seconds of delay.
What made the Astra ('window cleaner spec' old Astra estate) driver even more of a knob was the fact that he tailgated me all the way out of town, moving left and right despite there being no obvious overtake on in busy traffic. Then we got onto a twisty road up and away from town, where he tried so 'set' for an overtake well before the NSL signs. I was studiously obeying the 40mph limit right up to the signs, and he was prevented from overtaking by oncoming traffic. He was 'dropping a gear', revving it with the clutch in, and flashing his high beams at me. I was hugely entertained by it all, then briskly accelerated to 60mph, and put some space between us. Initially he started to catch up, but a few twists and turns without recourse to the brakes soon had him re-assessing his talent/ambition ratio. He fell back pretty quickly from then on, and I was deprived of the opportunity for any further entertainment.
When the bus slowed to almost a stop to let traffic past a parked car, Mr angry Astra driver saw his opportunity and floored it past me, on a blind bend. He was now entering a 30mph village with a truck approaching so he chopped in between me and the bus where he stayed for the next few miles.
Eventually the bus had to make a left turn. Mr Angry couldn't possibly wait for this so attempted an overtake, completely failing to realise that the back end of buses tent to swing out a bit when they turn. Mr Angry also didn't notice the tipper truck rapidly approaching. He took a couple of swerves to his right and then a big swerve left to avoid the tipper truck. He then carried on his way obeying the speed limit and never getting more than a few car lengths ahead of me! Maybe he frightened himself!
GravelMachineGun said:
My wife's friend who refers to her brand new white A class (diesel) as "the AMG" because she has an AMG badge on it.
That annoys me.
Saw a White A class the other day. Lots of AMG badges. And 4Matic.That annoys me.
Nothing that said A45 though
The actual A45's are growing on me recently.
The absolute 
in his RRS that deliberately drove through the large mass of water, that wasn't draining away, on the Portsmouth Road near Frimley Park Hospital this afternoon soaking a number of people walking on the pavement, which included people that worked at the hospital as well as people walking there for an appointment 
Now Fatty and his orange Oopma Loompa passenger thought what they'd done was hilarious but, unfortunately for them, they weren't laughing once they got themselves firmly stuck in the queue of traffic that was backing up waiting to enter FPH car park
Upon noticing this myself and a doctor (plus a nurse and 2 pedestrians that had got fairly wet) all decided to see how this pathetic excuse for an individual would react if we challenged him As expected Mr Tiny Penis hurriedly locked his doors and started shouting that he'd "call the Police" because he was "in fear for his & his wife's lives" whilst the Oompa Loompa was desperately trying to cover her face with a towel The doctor told him to go ahead as that way they could talk to him about what he'd just done with the flood puddle 
Unfortunately before we could do anything else the traffic queue edged forward enough to allow the fat enough space to dive out from behind the car in front of him and he proceeded to tear off down the road, at more than the 30limit, to make his escape
in his RRS that deliberately drove through the large mass of water, that wasn't draining away, on the Portsmouth Road near Frimley Park Hospital this afternoon soaking a number of people walking on the pavement, which included people that worked at the hospital as well as people walking there for an appointment Now Fatty and his orange Oopma Loompa passenger thought what they'd done was hilarious but, unfortunately for them, they weren't laughing once they got themselves firmly stuck in the queue of traffic that was backing up waiting to enter FPH car park
Upon noticing this myself and a doctor (plus a nurse and 2 pedestrians that had got fairly wet) all decided to see how this pathetic excuse for an individual would react if we challenged him
As expected Mr Tiny Penis hurriedly locked his doors and started shouting that he'd "call the Police" because he was "in fear for his & his wife's lives" whilst the Oompa Loompa was desperately trying to cover her face with a towel The doctor told him to go ahead as that way they could talk to him about what he'd just done with the flood puddle Unfortunately before we could do anything else the traffic queue edged forward enough to allow the fat
enough space to dive out from behind the car in front of him and he proceeded to tear off down the road, at more than the 30limit, to make his escape Gassing Station | General Gassing | Top of Page | What's New | My Stuff