What is the least "PH" car?
Discussion
BenWRXSEi said:
I'm amazed no one has mentioned the Toyota Avensis. Presumably anyone who has driven one has since forgotten.
Oh God, yes. I had a 2006 model, one down from the top spec. It was like driving a corpse with the rigor mortis option pack.So bored with it were we that on one drive up the M1 we became obsessed with trying to edge the trip computer up to 60 mpg by driving at 49 mph.
Awful, awful experience. Sold it after three months.
The earlier RAV 4 (2004) was almost as boring. But the Avensis finally cured my misconception of Toyotas as 'nice cars.' They are only suitable for a one-way drive to Dignitas.
I'd rather have a Wagon R.
How about a car that desperately tries to be PH but fails catastrophically on all counts? I nominate the Hyundai Coupe. Dire! I once went stark, staring, stabby, crazy bats
t insane for about five months and owned one. I still wake in the night screaming in terror and despair about that car, even though my period of psychosis was over ten years ago.
t insane for about five months and owned one. I still wake in the night screaming in terror and despair about that car, even though my period of psychosis was over ten years ago. I'd like to leap to the defence of the Vauxhall Astra 1.4. Not because it's any sort of driving machine but because it makes a great shed choice. I know very well, I made a profit on mine. Bought it for a staggering £275 and sold it 18 months on for £300, having taken it to France for work for 3 months. It did a sterling job and remains a car for which I have great respect and affection. Here's the rub though - it came to me with the usual collection of receipts, including one for about £2k when it was ~10 yrs old and ~60k miles. At that point I think it offers poor value - little merit over the sheddy version I bought, other than a newer plate, but still an old, grubby, boring car.
The rub is that boring cars make good sheds. A £1000 Corolla will take you on holiday to Europe, provided you take enough caffeine drinks and some entertaining companions to stop you losing the will to live. A £1000 5 series will put you on first name terms with the local AA man before you get to the port.
So a non PH car can't be a shed. Sheds are inherently PH because you have to get involved with them either to make them tolerable to be in or simply to keep them running.
So here's a few criteria:
Automatics are non-PH
Cars expensive enough to need finance are non-PH
Non-PH needs low performance but not comedy low performance like a 2CV or Landy S1
Electric and hybrid are non-PH unless they have Tesla like levels of performance
It can't be a classic in any way, now or in the future
Any risk, fun or excitement is non-PH
I think that covers it. Mind you I have a nagging doubt about "no fun". A Skoda CitiGo is very non-PH, but if a young woman got hold of one and covered it in flowers and interior decoration it would be fun, and it would become *even more* non-PH. Hmm.
The rub is that boring cars make good sheds. A £1000 Corolla will take you on holiday to Europe, provided you take enough caffeine drinks and some entertaining companions to stop you losing the will to live. A £1000 5 series will put you on first name terms with the local AA man before you get to the port.
So a non PH car can't be a shed. Sheds are inherently PH because you have to get involved with them either to make them tolerable to be in or simply to keep them running.
So here's a few criteria:
Automatics are non-PH
Cars expensive enough to need finance are non-PH
Non-PH needs low performance but not comedy low performance like a 2CV or Landy S1
Electric and hybrid are non-PH unless they have Tesla like levels of performance
It can't be a classic in any way, now or in the future
Any risk, fun or excitement is non-PH
I think that covers it. Mind you I have a nagging doubt about "no fun". A Skoda CitiGo is very non-PH, but if a young woman got hold of one and covered it in flowers and interior decoration it would be fun, and it would become *even more* non-PH. Hmm.
Breadvan72 said:
How about a car that desperately tries to be PH but fails catastrophically on all counts? I nominate the Hyundai Coupe. Dire! I once went stark, staring, stabby, crazy batst insane for about five months and owned one. I still wake in the night screaming in terror and despair about that car, even though my period of psychosis was over ten years ago.
It's always amusing when browsing the festering cesspool of keyboard war that is Barryboys when someone posts up one of these from pre 2002. Owners jump to explain how they're actually brilliant drivers cars.t insane for about five months and owned one. I still wake in the night screaming in terror and despair about that car, even though my period of psychosis was over ten years ago. Driven one once when I was 18 and wanted the fastest thing I could insure. My lasting memory is still the length of the throw in the gearbox. 3rd to 4th was pretty much arm fully extended to 90 degrees.
My first thought was the Daewoo Nexia I had as a courtesy car once - this was the car based on an early generation Vauxhall Astra (not exactly giving it a flying start in life) but cleverly tweaked by Daewoo to make it just that little bit worse in pretty much every discernible way. It was utterly crap, but not charmingly crap or even hilariously crap; just annoyingly, depressingly, frustratingly crap. But then I realised, I was in possession of the car for 24 hours some 15 years ago and yet I remember it like it was yesterday...clearly not what we're looking for then.
So...the Mitsubishi Carisma. It has been repeatedly criticised for having arguably the least appropriate name in automotive history, but unfairly so in my opinion. The eagle-eyed amongst you will note it is spelt without an 'h'. The reason is because Mitsubishi decided to take the word 'charisma' and subtly alter it to reflect the single most noteworthy characteristic of the vehicle in question...that it's a 'car'. Carisma...do you see?! Car-isma! Not 'Charisma' but 'Carisma'!!! Because it's a car!!! Consider that anecdote and tell me it isn't perfect for the vehicle in question! Consider that anecdote and tell my why I don't get invited to dinner parties any more...
Anyway, the car was offered with a choice of petrol or diesel engines (all sub-2ltr, the mightiest of which generated a Top-Fuel-Dragster-worrying 125bhp) and its Wikipedia entry describes the styling as follow: 'In spite of its name, the Carisma had a fairly neutral design as a result of being Mitsubishi's first attempt to target the traditionally conservative European company car market. Even when receiving a midlife facelift in 1999 that characteristic was not improved. The car underwent a very light redesign again in 2002, with the main difference being the new headlights.'
What more can you say...?!
So...the Mitsubishi Carisma. It has been repeatedly criticised for having arguably the least appropriate name in automotive history, but unfairly so in my opinion. The eagle-eyed amongst you will note it is spelt without an 'h'. The reason is because Mitsubishi decided to take the word 'charisma' and subtly alter it to reflect the single most noteworthy characteristic of the vehicle in question...that it's a 'car'. Carisma...do you see?! Car-isma! Not 'Charisma' but 'Carisma'!!! Because it's a car!!! Consider that anecdote and tell me it isn't perfect for the vehicle in question! Consider that anecdote and tell my why I don't get invited to dinner parties any more...
Anyway, the car was offered with a choice of petrol or diesel engines (all sub-2ltr, the mightiest of which generated a Top-Fuel-Dragster-worrying 125bhp) and its Wikipedia entry describes the styling as follow: 'In spite of its name, the Carisma had a fairly neutral design as a result of being Mitsubishi's first attempt to target the traditionally conservative European company car market. Even when receiving a midlife facelift in 1999 that characteristic was not improved. The car underwent a very light redesign again in 2002, with the main difference being the new headlights.'
What more can you say...?!
vtecyo said:
Breadvan72 said:
How about a car that desperately tries to be PH but fails catastrophically on all counts? I nominate the Hyundai Coupe. Dire! I once went stark, staring, stabby, crazy batst insane for about five months and owned one. I still wake in the night screaming in terror and despair about that car, even though my period of psychosis was over ten years ago.
It's always amusing when browsing the festering cesspool of keyboard war that is Barryboys when someone posts up one of these from pre 2002. Owners jump to explain how they're actually brilliant drivers cars.t insane for about five months and owned one. I still wake in the night screaming in terror and despair about that car, even though my period of psychosis was over ten years ago. Driven one once when I was 18 and wanted the fastest thing I could insure. My lasting memory is still the length of the throw in the gearbox. 3rd to 4th was pretty much arm fully extended to 90 degrees.
k knows how, so gutless a heap it was.Breadvan72 said:
vtecyo said:
Breadvan72 said:
How about a car that desperately tries to be PH but fails catastrophically on all counts? I nominate the Hyundai Coupe. Dire! I once went stark, staring, stabby, crazy batst insane for about five months and owned one. I still wake in the night screaming in terror and despair about that car, even though my period of psychosis was over ten years ago.
It's always amusing when browsing the festering cesspool of keyboard war that is Barryboys when someone posts up one of these from pre 2002. Owners jump to explain how they're actually brilliant drivers cars.t insane for about five months and owned one. I still wake in the night screaming in terror and despair about that car, even though my period of psychosis was over ten years ago. Driven one once when I was 18 and wanted the fastest thing I could insure. My lasting memory is still the length of the throw in the gearbox. 3rd to 4th was pretty much arm fully extended to 90 degrees.
k knows how, so gutless a heap it was.
Negative Creep said:
I thought that model looked smart, but the one before must take the award for the worst facelift of all time
Agreed. The 2002 model looked OK if you squinted and did not get too close to it. Up close, it looked shonky and cheap, and the interior was a naff as a naff thing. How they managed to produce a V6 that sounded so rubbish and was so unexciting to sit behind, whilst being fairly thirsty (but without the fun that usually goes with thirst), is beyond me. I think that I got caught speeding in the car because I was trying to get away from it as fast as I could. As well as a UK fine, I got a 60 schilling AS fine just after crossing the border into Austria when I took the frightful contraption on a Euro road trip. Very smart uniforms, very polite police officers, I must say. Matt UK said:
I'll vote for a recent courtesy car: a grey Vauxhall Corsa 1.4 petrol automatic.
Tragic.
I agree, the worst car I have driven in recent memory is a Vauxhall Corsa. I am genuinely surprised at how poor a modern car can be, and absolutely gutless. I go to Europe a couple of times a year and hire the cheapest 4 door car I can, at the moment I've got a Seat Ibiza, it's not a bad car. Had a Chevy Spark once, at least that had a bit of character, the Corsa is just pure sTragic.
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