Ungrateful offspring....
Discussion
R8VXF said:
I had an '84 Breadvan. Brilliant little things. Just warn your little s
t that the brakes need a very firm application!
Yes, that. Brakes are a bit of a surprise if you've come from a modern car.t that the brakes need a very firm application!Speed Badger said:
What does giving your son a £150 car say to him?
You love him £150 more than my parents loved me?458bhp said:
Sell the car, go down to Halfords, buy a headunit (CD capable of course) and give him that instead.
This is genius.I don't really recall "cool" being a priority for anyone's car when I was a school. I had a Fiesta 1.1L, my mates had a Renault 5 a Metro, a Nova, a 309 and other low spec hatchbacks, plus a few older cars such as a Chevette and an Opel Kadett (the Mk1 Astra version). It was having transport that was cool not what that transport was.
Then again I lived about a mile form the bus stop and we had 2 or 3 busses a day so without a car I was pretty much limited to cycling and I was lazy.
Then again I lived about a mile form the bus stop and we had 2 or 3 busses a day so without a car I was pretty much limited to cycling and I was lazy.
Pints said:
It says his dad cares enough about him to give him the gift of trust and freedom. Not to mention the opportunity to spend time with his old man tinkering on the car, adding and fixing it to make it his own.
I love my dad and although he didn't have the money to buy my own car, he helped my motoring journeys in other ways for which I'm eternally grateful. Spending time with my dad while we poke around under the bonnet was (and still is) something I enjoy.
Exactly. What does it say if you gave him a £100k Bentley? That you don't give two shI love my dad and although he didn't have the money to buy my own car, he helped my motoring journeys in other ways for which I'm eternally grateful. Spending time with my dad while we poke around under the bonnet was (and still is) something I enjoy.
ts about him.To be honest, if he's even remotely petrolhead inclined, then get online and show him what can be done to it.
Now I know everyone on PH is anti-scenekid modification etc etc, but at a younger age many of us (un)tastefully modified our cars.
Show him what others have done to their versions of the car. You have to capture his imagination. He's most likely concerned with what he thinks EVERYONE will think of him, he's at the age where he probably hasn't taught himself to care a lot less about what random people and mates he probably wont have in 2 years time think.
I think you're a great dad for buying him something so retro and cool, it's not your fault he can't see the potential but rather than take the obscenely heavy handed approach that other PH'ers have suggested, I suggest you use it to try connect and inspire him. That car might just create the love of cars that many of us have, it's often the case with the first car.
Or it might inspire him to get something a hell of a lot better, either way you win.
(Not to my personal taste, but an extremely popular look)
Honestly, and this is being completely and utterly honest. I think I would have been pretty gutted had I been offered the same car at the same age, now it's nothing to do with being raised wrong or being ungrateful and everything to do with, being 17. I think a lot of people forget how self-concious & how very emotional most if not all 17 year olds are. Not everyone, but most.
But, my old man probably would have taken the time to show me the potential and value in the car, and I might not have seen it or agreed at first but over time I would have probably realized. And he might not apologize, but he will come to agree with you, and probably tell you all the cool stories of all the cool st he does in his car. Which would be good enough for me.
Just my 2cents as a younger PH'er.
Now I know everyone on PH is anti-scenekid modification etc etc, but at a younger age many of us (un)tastefully modified our cars.
Show him what others have done to their versions of the car. You have to capture his imagination. He's most likely concerned with what he thinks EVERYONE will think of him, he's at the age where he probably hasn't taught himself to care a lot less about what random people and mates he probably wont have in 2 years time think.
I think you're a great dad for buying him something so retro and cool, it's not your fault he can't see the potential but rather than take the obscenely heavy handed approach that other PH'ers have suggested, I suggest you use it to try connect and inspire him. That car might just create the love of cars that many of us have, it's often the case with the first car.
Or it might inspire him to get something a hell of a lot better, either way you win.
(Not to my personal taste, but an extremely popular look)
Honestly, and this is being completely and utterly honest. I think I would have been pretty gutted had I been offered the same car at the same age, now it's nothing to do with being raised wrong or being ungrateful and everything to do with, being 17. I think a lot of people forget how self-concious & how very emotional most if not all 17 year olds are. Not everyone, but most.
But, my old man probably would have taken the time to show me the potential and value in the car, and I might not have seen it or agreed at first but over time I would have probably realized. And he might not apologize, but he will come to agree with you, and probably tell you all the cool stories of all the cool s
t he does in his car. Which would be good enough for me.Just my 2cents as a younger PH'er.
currybum said:
8Ace said:
They're 17. They all do that Sir...
I know what people are getting at re the old stter, but I suspect once 6,4 and 2 Ace are old enough I'll do precisely what currybum is suggesting.
Plus I don't want to be picked up from the pub in a sI know what people are getting at re the old s
tter, but I suspect once 6,4 and 2 Ace are old enough I'll do precisely what currybum is suggesting. tbox...;-)Things have changed over the year, given the almost standard requirements of further education and university gone are the days where parents kick the kids out at 16 and tell them they are on their own (the PH way).
In reality I have signed up to supporting my offspring through university to give them as best start I can, (starting £50k in the hole is not a great way to start). Part of that is helping them with safe transport.
Edited by currybum on Tuesday 12th January 16:19
Not saying this applies to yours but its not very unusual at all.
I'm going to play devils advocate here.
The son may have been led to expect a car, and he was probably hoping for something better. If anyone remembers the inbetweeners episode where he gets given that awful car, you can sympathise a little. No hope of impressing women, and that's what all 17 year olds care about.
It's not an easy age because getting a job that pays decently at the weekend, isn't depressing or degrading or gets in the way of college is hard. Even if you have a great weekend job and work Saturday and Sunday you'll earn nowhere near enough to buy a car, tax and insure it.
He probably feels a little bit out of control of his own life and was hoping for a nice car to make it easier to feel cool and attractive. Perfectly understandable, after all any of us would be unhappy in a car we didn't like, the only difference being we've got to the point in our lives where we can buy our own.
Talk to him about it. it might be worth showing him just how much money it's going to cost you to pay for his driving lessons and get him insured on a car to drive. Might make him realise.
And if he's still being ungrateful then make him pay rent.
The other theory is that being on ph, you have a really nice car and he just wants to use yours from time to time to impress people with. He's not bothered about having his own.
The son may have been led to expect a car, and he was probably hoping for something better. If anyone remembers the inbetweeners episode where he gets given that awful car, you can sympathise a little. No hope of impressing women, and that's what all 17 year olds care about.
It's not an easy age because getting a job that pays decently at the weekend, isn't depressing or degrading or gets in the way of college is hard. Even if you have a great weekend job and work Saturday and Sunday you'll earn nowhere near enough to buy a car, tax and insure it.
He probably feels a little bit out of control of his own life and was hoping for a nice car to make it easier to feel cool and attractive. Perfectly understandable, after all any of us would be unhappy in a car we didn't like, the only difference being we've got to the point in our lives where we can buy our own.
Talk to him about it. it might be worth showing him just how much money it's going to cost you to pay for his driving lessons and get him insured on a car to drive. Might make him realise.
And if he's still being ungrateful then make him pay rent.
The other theory is that being on ph, you have a really nice car and he just wants to use yours from time to time to impress people with. He's not bothered about having his own.
Blanchimont said:
I had a Ka as my first car, and I didn't particularly fancy it, it was wheels and it got bought for me and I loved it.
I did naff all to it except put a new radio in, but I loved it for what it was, cheap, easy to fix transport which was dry for a year.
Same here.I did naff all to it except put a new radio in, but I loved it for what it was, cheap, easy to fix transport which was dry for a year.
Forest green. Rust down from the filler cap. No PAS, no ABS, keep fit windows etc. CD player? no. Radio that was about as good as a windy up job? Yep. Did I look like a big gay plonker? Yep. But friggin brilliant little car and no one gives a flying rat s
t what you look like because you are the embodiment of freedom! Go where you want, whenever you want!Hardy little thing as well. You could properly abuse it.
The bumpers were a great design as well, in three parts and un-painted. If you dinged a corner, you only need to buy that corner and do a straight swap. No paint. No wiring. Easy (though by then you'd probably need to get some trim restorer out to revive the faded grey plastic!).
Pints said:
It says his dad cares enough about him to give him the gift of trust and freedom. Not to mention the opportunity to spend time with his old man tinkering on the car, adding and fixing it to make it his own.
I love my dad and although he didn't have the money to buy my own car, he helped my motoring journeys in other ways for which I'm eternally grateful. Spending time with my dad while we poke around under the bonnet was (and still is) something I enjoy.
But is that what he wants, or what his dad wants? As a 17 year old I'm not sure that the opportunity to spend time tinkering with my old man would've been as appealing as driving around in a modern sI love my dad and although he didn't have the money to buy my own car, he helped my motoring journeys in other ways for which I'm eternally grateful. Spending time with my dad while we poke around under the bonnet was (and still is) something I enjoy.
tbox trying to get my end away.Don't get me wrong, I think it's a great gift, and if my dad got me one for my 32nd birthday I'd be well chuffed, but I can see why an irrational, moody teenager may not think it's so cool.
bungz said:
Davey S2 said:
This.
A second class ride is better than a first class walk.
I had a burgundy Citroen BX with an interior in 'hearing aid' beige for my 18th.
Forget about a CD player, it didn't even have self cancelling indicators.
Thats cool as heck.A second class ride is better than a first class walk.
I had a burgundy Citroen BX with an interior in 'hearing aid' beige for my 18th.
Forget about a CD player, it didn't even have self cancelling indicators.
Bet none of your mates cars had had go go gadget wheels eh?
Ill always remember the car my dad brought home for me. a Miami blue Peugeot 106 Key West with a ripsnorting 1.4 diesel engine. No ABS No PAS manual windows and super uncool 5 Doors. I loved it. it was cheap for an 18 year old to run and gave me the freedom I needed. As the others have said that Polo sounds cool and yet another home here for it if you want to sell it on
I was given an E30 316i Touring (Lux 
) as my first car. At the time it was a free means of conveyance and despite being a petrol head I didnt see much potential in it and thought the clutch was knackered.
I spent a little bit of money on it getting it nice and tidy and kept it straight but sold it shortly after because I thought I could get into something much cooler. I gave all of the money earned to my folks because Im good like that.
In hindsight I realise the clutch was fine and my left foot motor control was probably to blame, and Id very much like to have another E30 touring as clean and straight as that one was as a project.
Your lad is probably thinking that his mates in their finance repmobiles or limited edition Corsa's are going to take the piss, and honestly, they probably will. At the end of the day its not a lot of money its cost you and you can probably sell it on for a good chunk of the asking. A well intentioned gift but maybe engage with him next time to see what sort of thing hes interested in.
) as my first car. At the time it was a free means of conveyance and despite being a petrol head I didnt see much potential in it and thought the clutch was knackered.I spent a little bit of money on it getting it nice and tidy and kept it straight but sold it shortly after because I thought I could get into something much cooler. I gave all of the money earned to my folks because Im good like that.
In hindsight I realise the clutch was fine and my left foot motor control was probably to blame, and Id very much like to have another E30 touring as clean and straight as that one was as a project.
Your lad is probably thinking that his mates in their finance repmobiles or limited edition Corsa's are going to take the piss, and honestly, they probably will. At the end of the day its not a lot of money its cost you and you can probably sell it on for a good chunk of the asking. A well intentioned gift but maybe engage with him next time to see what sort of thing hes interested in.
essIII said:
Pints said:
It says his dad cares enough about him to give him the gift of trust and freedom. Not to mention the opportunity to spend time with his old man tinkering on the car, adding and fixing it to make it his own.
I love my dad and although he didn't have the money to buy my own car, he helped my motoring journeys in other ways for which I'm eternally grateful. Spending time with my dad while we poke around under the bonnet was (and still is) something I enjoy.
But is that what he wants, or what his dad wants? As a 17 year old I'm not sure that the opportunity to spend time tinkering with my old man would've been as appealing as driving around in a modern sI love my dad and although he didn't have the money to buy my own car, he helped my motoring journeys in other ways for which I'm eternally grateful. Spending time with my dad while we poke around under the bonnet was (and still is) something I enjoy.
tbox trying to get my end away.Don't get me wrong, I think it's a great gift, and if my dad got me one for my 32nd birthday I'd be well chuffed, but I can see why an irrational, moody teenager may not think it's so cool.
When my 5 year old sounded ungrateful for an early Christmas gift from a grandparent, she was taken aside and made to understand that people have feelings, that she is given gifts by people who love her, and that there are other boys and girls who aren't as lucky as she is.
Her attitude on Christmas day was very different.
My soon to be 17yo daughter cannot wait to drive and to own her own car, recently I have been getting autotrader links to Corsa's and KA's; cheap ones around £500-£600, she is doing A-levels and works part time, I haven't the heart to tell her that the running costs will be crippling.
She knows full well that we will pay towards some lessons but a car and paying to run it is all down to her, luckily she has a very good friend who is just 17, and in the same boat as her, she picked up a KA for £200 using her own money, she has already passed her theory and it sounds as though she will be doing her practical soon. They do have an acquaintance who gets everything on a plate but they don't really like her, she keeps posting on Instagram and twitter about the brand new white Corsa she is getting for her 17th, no one really likes her as she is spoilt and doesn't appreciate what she gets.
Daughters 17yo boyfriend is well chuffed with his £100, 20,000 mile P plate Corsa that was "nicked" off an old boy, he isn't driving yet; failed his theory for the 13th time, that we know of, he's stopped telling us when he is going for them now.
So even if my daughter comes to the realisation that owning and running a car may be beyond her pocket, she is really keen to get her licence, which gets it out of the way and is one less thing to worry about when older; unlike her 23yo sister who is licence-less!
She knows full well that we will pay towards some lessons but a car and paying to run it is all down to her, luckily she has a very good friend who is just 17, and in the same boat as her, she picked up a KA for £200 using her own money, she has already passed her theory and it sounds as though she will be doing her practical soon. They do have an acquaintance who gets everything on a plate but they don't really like her, she keeps posting on Instagram and twitter about the brand new white Corsa she is getting for her 17th, no one really likes her as she is spoilt and doesn't appreciate what she gets.
Daughters 17yo boyfriend is well chuffed with his £100, 20,000 mile P plate Corsa that was "nicked" off an old boy, he isn't driving yet; failed his theory for the 13th time, that we know of, he's stopped telling us when he is going for them now.
So even if my daughter comes to the realisation that owning and running a car may be beyond her pocket, she is really keen to get her licence, which gets it out of the way and is one less thing to worry about when older; unlike her 23yo sister who is licence-less!
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