Your car relationships as romances.

[Actus Reus]

I met a young German and, once I'd taken her top off the first time, I was overcome with desire.

We spent a happy 18 months together, but when I discovered that she was gently leaking lubricant from her rear seal I decided that she might be a problem, and so swapped her for something more sensible. I sometimes wonder what happened to her, but I fear that her incontinence got much much worse as she doesn't seem to be registered anywhere these days. Hopefully she's just changed her name, and is still out there, somewhere.

(987 Boxster S)

[Gary C]

Jaroon said:

My latest wife is a black beauty I'd been eyeing up for months before mustering up the courage to take her out for a spin. We were chaperoned so no shenanigans but with the promise of some tasty action if I were to commit, and smitten as I was I popped the question there and then, she said yes! I felt quite a cad as I still loved my current wife but she was getting on a bit and to my shame I had a wandering eye. The divorce was straight forward thank fully and I understand she is with her new man and happy, I wish them both well.

One ex sticks out in my mind, an Oriental beauty, she was a real goer and swept me off my feet, however I soon realized she was only with me for my money and I just couldn't spend enough on her to keep her happy. Also although she was a fine looking woman, how to say this as a gentleman, her undercarriage had seen better days and the day she left me I felt a blessed release.

Cars Jaguar XFR, Merc C55 AMG and Mitsubishi Evo 6.

Any other tales of love, lust or woe?

Weirdo.