One single thing that makes you think "knob"

One single thing that makes you think "knob"

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tercelgold

969 posts

156 months

Saturday 6th October 2012
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People going onto my side of the road when i'm riding a motorbike and we both have flood water. I can stay within my lane and make it but cars seem to think they can straddle the center line and avoid the icky water while maintaining 40 mph instead of slowing and driving through it.

It's not my fault you can't fit and I only give way to avoid you murdering me.

Colonial

13,553 posts

204 months

Saturday 6th October 2012
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Some tool in an unroadworthy car with his window down got all aggreived at me today when I accidently splashed his car and got him wet when driving through a small puddle.

Tool.

Morningside

24,110 posts

228 months

Saturday 6th October 2012
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SV8Predator said:
rohrl said:
Morningside said:
Colchester car auctions on Thursday nights. Lots of cars causing a hell of a lot of fumes. So what do I spot?

Yup, a parent with a child on a harness. I mean, how totally inconsiderate is that?
Well done you for thinking of the children, maybe you ought to go to the Goodwood Festival of Speed to tick off any parents there too. Lots of the old racing cars probably still run on leaded fuel so that's even worse.
Whooshparrot for 'rohrl' I feel. . .
yes
Apart from it all being enclosed at the actual auction itself, most of the cars are undercover and hence all the fumes!

Zyp

14,673 posts

188 months

Saturday 6th October 2012
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Morningside said:
SV8Predator said:
rohrl said:
Morningside said:
Colchester car auctions on Thursday nights. Lots of cars causing a hell of a lot of fumes. So what do I spot?

Yup, a parent with a child on a harness. I mean, how totally inconsiderate is that?
Well done you for thinking of the children, maybe you ought to go to the Goodwood Festival of Speed to tick off any parents there too. Lots of the old racing cars probably still run on leaded fuel so that's even worse.
Whooshparrot for 'rohrl' I feel. . .
yes
Apart from it all being enclosed at the actual auction itself, most of the cars are undercover and hence all the fumes!
During the 1970's we used to walk to school past a factory that had its own 4 star petrol pump for the rep's cars.
We used to actively inhale the fumes as we walked past..... rotate

m8rky

2,090 posts

158 months

Saturday 6th October 2012
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Woman in an 07 plate Carrera 4 in Bognor today dawdling along at 20 in a 30 reading a text,pelican crossing turned red and just trundled through oblivious to the fact a Mum had to rapidly pull back her kid and pushchair to avoid being flattened.

How the fk did you get enough money to buy a Porsche you total and utter fkwit.

Papa Hotel

12,760 posts

181 months

Saturday 6th October 2012
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"Renaultsport Clio owners wanted a 1.6 turbo, not a N/A screaming 2 litre."

"The flappy paddles are more involving than a proper gearbox."

"It's nearly as heavy as the old car."

Knobbery, the lot of it.

e21Mark

16,205 posts

172 months

Saturday 6th October 2012
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Knob


Hudson

1,857 posts

186 months

Sunday 7th October 2012
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OpulentBob said:
Yeah, he followed me in the kitchen, shut the door and started saying how only the slightest knock can set it off and the docs can't prove it, easy money etc. I told him that's the reason my insurance goes up every year rather than down. He looked at me like I was stupid.
Tell him I hope he dies

Liquid Knight

15,754 posts

182 months

Sunday 7th October 2012
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m8rky said:
How the fk did you get enough money to buy a Porsche you total and utter fkwit.
Money doesn't buy you sense.

TankRS

2,850 posts

153 months

Sunday 7th October 2012
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Liquid Knight said:
m8rky said:
How the fk did you get enough money to buy a Porsche you total and utter fkwit.
Money doesn't buy you sense.
im sure money and her brains had nothing to do with how she got her car wink



2 from last night for me

A new bypass has not had street lights put up so in the dark it does require use of full beams in some sections. I know some people hesitate in switching theirs off, but last nights turdbrain completely failed to acknowledge me and the car a few lengths behind me and left his on, despite me giving a flash of mine as a way of saying ‘your beams are still on dipst’ i had a fairly lofty driving position in the Vito i was driving but his lights were so bright they managed to completely blind me! god knows how the mx-5 behind me managed, though i did hear him blast his horn.

Next one – driving down a road and approaching the traffic lights which the road splits to 3 lanes, one designated right turn and 2 for straight on, on approach the lights were red but as we got closer they changed to green so all the traffic sped up to go through, well all except for the car in the left most lane who decided he actually wanted to be turning right. Heaved on the anchors and cut straight across both lanes to get to his at an almost 90 degree angle to the oncoming traffic!! He very nearly got T-boned by the car in front of me and had there been other cars behind me i don’t doubt i’d have been rear ended!

TankRS

2,850 posts

153 months

Sunday 7th October 2012
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vsonix said:
hedgefinder said:
far , far worse than that is when you advertise a car with a price stated and the first question people ask is "whats the lowest you will take for it.." and then refuse to make an offer.
Hmm, see I always plan ahead for that and build in a couple of hundred quid leeway, so when I (invariably) get asked 'what's the lowest' I just tell them £100 more than what I actually want and then maybe let them have £50 more off that if they're trying really hard, meaning I usually get what I wanted, plus £50, and they walk away thinking they're kickass negotiators... Otherwise I just ask them how much money they've got on them. That usually shuts them up if they're not serious.
I’m currently suffering with these idiots as i’m trying and sell my car.

Have had to take my number off the ad too after getting bks calls at all hours of the day, despite saying only after 5pm please. The last straw on that was a lad from Birmingham who called at 9am to say he was driving down to Wales right now with a cheque for the car and would i keep it until he got there.

I said i’d keep the car until the cheque had cleared. He hung up.

He did call back an hour or so later, ‘i’m still on my way mate, i have cash but can only take £300 out of the account, could i take that as a deposit and get the rest transferred when i get home?’

I told him i’d just taken a call off a guy interested with the amount i’m asking ready (bit of a fib mind)

He hangs up. Rings back again about an hour later. Saying he’s just outside Cardiff and would i meet him in a services so he can see the car, and that he had a great idea! He would write me the cheque out to cash, i take it to one of these shops that cash them and then he can take the car. I’m ok with that. But i can’t bring the car to him as its not insured anymore and wont drive it without any, he is more than welcome to come and see it at the lockup its stored in.

He starts effing and jeffing about how if he’d known this he wouldn’t have come down for it, and that there was no way he was travelling all the way up to the valleys to see the car as its probably not worth what i’m asking for it!?

No problems mate i replied, thanks for the interest anyway, and as i go to hang up he calls me an stupid effing , and hope the car burns before i sell it!!??. Charming is how his mother would describe him I’m sure!!!

Had an email off a guy interested, gave him all the details, we negotiated a price i was happy to sell at, then he dropped the . . . .oh yeah, i’m in Nigeria and would i ship the car to him at my cost!?!? I politely refused. Have had an email every day twice a day saying he has the cash ready and now needs my bank details to transfer the money.
I’ve just mailed him back for his bank details so i can confirm with my bank that he has transferred the money, see how he responds to that one wink


I don’t want to have to deal with the Ebay buffoons, but if it doesn’t sell by the end of the month i may have no choice but to list it frown

silverfoxcc

7,683 posts

144 months

Sunday 7th October 2012
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Had the ultimate prick today. A316 going into London near Twikkers. I am in a convoy of traffic all doing 40 mph ( the limit) I am on Cruise as i suspect the guys in front were, kept the 2 sec distance and everybody bowling along. UNTIL the st filled brain of the totally addled bd fker behind me decided that 40 mph doesnt apply to him. and decised to read the small print on my bumper, fkwit, not content with this this old cretinous object of humanity who is doing the best to imitate a turd of low iq then pulls into the inside lane and passes me, cuts in front, and then brake tsts me. I must have annoyed him somwwhat then as the 10sec blast on the horn followed by the universal wker sign, got his wizened features out of his window and he starts given ME verbals. Now having seen that this bloke is shortly due for a one way trip to Mortlake Crem, it took all of my willpower not to get out o the car and twist his fkin scrawny heck several times in an anti clockwise direction whist grabbing his bks and shovin them down the toothless maw he calls a mouth. I was that incensed at this overpowering demonstration of how to be a complete fking in charge of an automobile that i didnt even make a note of his reg, so he can be named and shamed. So Ph's beware of of an aged that drives IIRC a french people carrier, who may live in the Hounslow area as that where he turned off, God its 10hrs later and i am still incandescent.
However it was a good visit to the Acton LT museum and Spurs won, so this fking mobile cadaver didnt spoil my day entirely

CoolHands

18,498 posts

194 months

Sunday 7th October 2012
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So why weren't you on the inside lane if it was empty?

ATTAK Z

10,599 posts

188 months

Sunday 7th October 2012
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silverfoxcc said:
.......so this fking mobile cadaver didnt spoil my day entirely
you're a touch annoyed aren't you ? read

TheLordJohn

5,746 posts

145 months

Sunday 7th October 2012
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CoolHands said:
So why weren't you on the inside lane if it was empty?
A valid point.
But you did read he said London...?
85% of drivers down south can't manage to pull in when there is a space.

fatboy69

9,371 posts

186 months

Sunday 7th October 2012
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The utter in his stupid ridiculous Audi Q7 on the M5 a while ago - it was dark hence the need for headlights.

Apart from the stupid in his ridiculous Audi Q7.

The stupid in his stood Audi Q7 didn't have any lights on at all on his stupid fking Audi Q7 - apart from when the stupid flashed his headlights in an attempt to bully people into moving out of his way.

Two drivers didn't/wouldn't move over so the stupid in his stupid Audi Q7 undertook them & then pulled back into the outside lane in front of them!

.

Saw him a little later parked up at Strensham services. Taking up 3 spaces.......

.

wst

3,494 posts

160 months

Sunday 7th October 2012
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The Crack Fox said:
Tw@t in a 911 'EU55 xxx' on the M6 on Friday who chooses to overtake when the signs indicate that lane 4 ends in 200 yards and lanes 1, 2 and 3 are already chock-a-block with moderately fast moving traffic. I watched this unfold from a safe distance. He gets to the end of lane 4, and does another hundred yards or so, way past the final arrows, before nearly side-swiping a van when he realises it's now a 3 lane, not a 4 lane, section. Plenty of spaces he couldn't have slotted into before then. Cue lots of hard braking and potential for accidents thanks to 1 turd with no common sense or spacial awareness. Never a copper about when you need one.

I hope his balls rot off.
Huh, I thought "Merge in turn" means "drive until the lanes cut down, and then it's one from lane 3, one from 4, one from 3, one from 4, alternating..."

You know, you're meant to do what EU55 did, and the actual knobs are the people that were going "Nuh uh, f you, Mr 911, I'm going to win this imaginary race tonight!"

Technically speaking anyway. If EU55 wasn't meant to be using that bit of road it's the road planners or roadworkers' fault for not ending lane 4 earlier!

TheHighlander

1,291 posts

197 months

Sunday 7th October 2012
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People wearing "aviators" when driving and raining heavily!

XDA

2,141 posts

184 months

Sunday 7th October 2012
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wst said:
The Crack Fox said:
Tw@t in a 911 'EU55 xxx' on the M6 on Friday who chooses to overtake when the signs indicate that lane 4 ends in 200 yards and lanes 1, 2 and 3 are already chock-a-block with moderately fast moving traffic. I watched this unfold from a safe distance. He gets to the end of lane 4, and does another hundred yards or so, way past the final arrows, before nearly side-swiping a van when he realises it's now a 3 lane, not a 4 lane, section. Plenty of spaces he couldn't have slotted into before then. Cue lots of hard braking and potential for accidents thanks to 1 turd with no common sense or spacial awareness. Never a copper about when you need one.

I hope his balls rot off.
Huh, I thought "Merge in turn" means "drive until the lanes cut down, and then it's one from lane 3, one from 4, one from 3, one from 4, alternating..."

You know, you're meant to do what EU55 did, and the actual knobs are the people that were going "Nuh uh, f you, Mr 911, I'm going to win this imaginary race tonight!"

Technically speaking anyway. If EU55 wasn't meant to be using that bit of road it's the road planners or roadworkers' fault for not ending lane 4 earlier!
You mean waiting until the very last second once you've ran out of road, and then force your way in? Ok then...

stewjohnst

2,442 posts

160 months

Sunday 7th October 2012
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Spending my time trawling the classifieds looking at all the cars I want then remembering I signed up for a four year company car and still have three years left to go on it frown
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