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charlieboy

Original Poster:

72 posts

131 months

[news] 
Monday 5th July 2004 quote quote all
Looked round old threads as advised to see if I could find the original Lyrics from 2003 but with no luck - Flasher can you help, my face still hurts from laughing so much at that and the Gay CD!!! Great to meet you by the way.

>>> Edited by charlieboy on Monday 5th July 17:37

>>> Edited by charlieboy on Wednesday 7th July 09:42

jeremyc

12,070 posts

170 months

[news] 
Monday 5th July 2004 quote quote all
Here's the version from 2003....

Porshiaa Boxxttaaaa
by flasher, Incorrigible and others.

Far have I travelled in My Porsche Boxta,
Wearing girls knickers and a lacy Bra,
To the hairdressers, with my girly car
as I drive like sissy in my Porsche Boxtaaa

Chorus:

porshia Boxtaaa,
I'm p*ssed and I've nowhere to wee
My desire is to wear womens knickers and a lacy bra..

I should be manly and buy a TVR,
But I wear girls knickers and a lacy bra,
I wish I was hairy like IG-U-A-NA
But I can't be hairy, cause I drive a girls car...

Chorus:

porshia Boxtaaa,
I'm p*ssed and I've nowhere to wee
My desire is to wear womens knickers and a lacy bra..

porshia Boxtaaaaaaaa
Iguana's handling and balance is as bad as his car!!
(after he fell over the tent!!)

Repeat for three hours to fade......

pikey

7,646 posts

170 months

[news] 
Tuesday 6th July 2004 quote quote all
jeremyc said:


Repeat for three hours to fade......


No.. I'm sure that bit's wrong. I think it was at least four hours to fade...

RiverGirrl

855 posts

167 months

[news] 
Tuesday 6th July 2004 quote quote all
Fantastic! Thanks, jeremyc...now I have my office wondering why I am crying and laughing at the same time

jeremyc

12,070 posts

170 months

[news] 
Tuesday 6th July 2004 quote quote all
RiverGirrl said:
Fantastic! Thanks, jeremyc...now I have my office wondering why I am crying and laughing at the same time

Sadly there's more where that came from. Just let me know if you need the details for any of these gems:
- Isn't it Moronic (by Domster, to a well know Alanis Morrisette tune)
- TVR Blues (as performed by The Flaming Gatsos at PF 2003)
- Blue LED Maxody (by Wedg1e, to Bohemian Rhapsody)



>> Edited by jeremyc on Tuesday 6th July 14:19
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Incorrigible

13,661 posts

147 months

[news] 
Tuesday 6th July 2004 quote quote all
jeremyc said:

- Blue LED Maxody (by Wedg1e, to Bohemian Rhapsody)
I see a really shitty spoiler on a Saxo

Bob the Planner

4,600 posts

155 months

[news] 
Tuesday 6th July 2004 quote quote all
jeremyc said:

RiverGirrl said:
Fantastic! Thanks, jeremyc...now I have my office wondering why I am crying and laughing at the same time


Sadly there's more where that came from. Just let me know if you need the details for any of these gems:
- Isn't it Moronic (by Domster, to a well know Alanis Morrisette tune)
- TVR Blues (as performed by The Flaming Gatsos at PF 2003)
- Blue LED Maxody (by Wedg1e, to Bohemian Rhapsody)



>> Edited by jeremyc on Tuesday 6th July 14:19


Post them up then Jeremy. I could do with a laugh.

I think the chorus of Porshia Boxxttaaaa changed slightly for this year, I'm sure I remember a line of 'I'll always be queer/In my Porshia Boxxttaaaa" in there somewhere.

jeremyc

12,070 posts

170 months

[news] 
Tuesday 6th July 2004 quote quote all
TVR Blues

I woke up this morning,
Went out to my car.
Still can t believe my luck,
I got a TVR.
So I started the engine,
Hear that V8 roar.
Then I heard it go BANG,
It don t work any more .

(But you know what?)
They all do that sir
I got the TVR blues.

Took it to the dealer,
They just jacked up the front.
Took one look at the engine,
Said you unlucky cu.......
Seems the engine has popped,
Leaking shit on the floor,
I asked how much it'd cost? ,
I ain t got money no more

They all do that sir
I got the TVR blues.

(Guitar Solo)

So I ve got me a Punto,
Discourtesy for six weeks,
While they charge me a fortune,
For my car to be fixed.
Then one day my phone rings,
The car s ready , they say,
(On my way to pick it up) Top speed 63,
The Fiat dies on the way

But, you know, they all do that too
I got the shit Fiat blues.

So I m broke and I m tired,
And I ain t smiled for weeks.
My girl s gone and left me,
For someone who ain't a PistonHeads geek.
But I m now in my car,
And I'm turnin' the key,
Hear that V8 roar,
And there s the grin guaranteed

Thank god they all do that sir
To kill the TVR blues

jeremyc

12,070 posts

170 months

[news] 
Tuesday 6th July 2004 quote quote all
Isn t it Moronic
By Domster
(Sing to 'Isn't it Ironic' by Ms Morrisette)


A burgundy Volvo that can do one-three-eight
Cruising at sixty-five on a clear carriageway
It s a 4x4 being used for the run to Safeway
It s someone in the middle lane who won t make way
Isn t it moronic don t you think?

(chorus)
It s like sun when you re drop top s away
It s the car park barrier up when you ve already paid
It s the Ferrari test drive you just didn t take
Who would have thought it figures

Mr Numpty Driver thought Lane 1 wasn t worth a try
He popped in a Werther and turned the Folk music high
He stuck at sixty in the middle lane at night
And as a dozen cars undertook him he thought
Well, that can t be right. And isn t it moronic don t you think?
(repeat chorus)

Well, life has a funny way of sneaking up on you
When you think staying in the middle lane is your God given right
And life has a funny way of helping you out when
You think everyone s a chimp and every other motorist gets
On your tits

Fog lights on when it s a nice sunny day
Hazards going when there s a free parking bay
It s like 10,000 ricers when all they need is a life
It s like winning a brand new Porsche
And finding the Cayenne box ticked by your wife
And isn't it moronic... don't you think
A little too moronic.. and yeah I really do think...
(repeat chorus)

Well life has a funny way of sneaking up on you
And life has a funny way of helping you out
Helping you out

jeremyc

12,070 posts

170 months

[news] 
Tuesday 6th July 2004 quote quote all
Blue LED Maxody
By Wedg1e (title by jeremyc )
(sung to tune of Bohemian Rhapsody)

Is that real carbon
Or is it plastic tat
Bought down at Halfords
You don't fool us, you stupid twat

Open your eyes
Look at proper cars and see
You're just a young boy
No taste or decency
Because its carbon this
Neon that
Lots of bling
Really phat
Anywhere that's painted
Put a sticker on it that says
Max. P.

Haha, you've bought a heap
Is it French or is it Jap
I can't tell, they all look crap
Haha I think you were done
And now you just won't admit it at all
Haha oh dear I'm laughing fit to bust
Under that bodykit it's all rust
Catty on, catty on
Image is all that matters

Blue LEDs, you need a lot
And then some lowered springs
Blacked out windows, lots of wings
Goodbye standard wheels, they've got to go
And don't forget a pair of 12 inch bins

Haha oh yeah you think you're really fast
We only let you past because we're laughing

(Instrumental break)

I bet you borrowed lots of money from your mam
Baseball cap, music's crap
Can you drive though? Don't think so.
Look at all that lighting-
What a bloody shite thing
No!
(Ally brakes? ) Oh no they're fakes.
(Ally brakes? ) Oh no they're fakes
(Ally brakes?) And those intakes?
Where do they go-o-o-o-o?
You're just a daft lad nobody rates you
(He's just a daft kid with a bad attitude)
(Spare him from having to go out to work)
Easy come, easy go, where's that dole all go
(Big filter? No! )You want some washer LEDs
(Let me go)
(Big filter?) You want some washer LEDs
(Let me go) You want some washer LEDS
(Let me go) want some washer LEDS
(Let me go) want some washer LEDS
(Let me go) want some washer LEDS
(Let me go)
Oh no no no no no
Oh mammy dear mammy dear will you look at what you've done
Max Power mag's put bad ideas inside your son, your son, your son

(Instrumental break)


So you think three-spoke alloy wheels look really trick?
And your big rear wing gives you lots of extra grip?
Oh really? Why doesn't it wheelie?
Race round the town
And if it breaks down
Phone your mammy

(Instrumental break)

Image really matters
That's what it must be
Shame you look a right prat
Yes you look a right prat
To me...

Mrs Fish

29,939 posts

144 months

[news] 
Tuesday 6th July 2004 quote quote all
just as excellent everytime I read it

chim_girl

6,260 posts

145 months

[news] 
Tuesday 6th July 2004 quote quote all
I can see a new CD being compiled for next year.

Bob the Planner

4,600 posts

155 months

[news] 
Tuesday 6th July 2004 quote quote all
fantastic - that has really cheered me up . Off to the pub now to kill a few more brain cells.

FunkyNige

5,469 posts

161 months

[news] 
Tuesday 6th July 2004 quote quote all
Did anyone get any audio of these (from TorqueRadio perhaps?) they could share?

RiverGirrl

855 posts

167 months

[news] 
Tuesday 6th July 2004 quote quote all
Oh dear...this is the first time I have ever read these lyrics, and now I really do need another keyboard....
and the hilarious/sad thing is: I work with a lad who wasn't sure he knew what a Cerbera was, and is more keen on deciding how big he wants the wheels to be on his 1.8 Focus

ace-t

5,760 posts

141 months

[news] 
Tuesday 6th July 2004 quote quote all
Quality!

Ace-T

Pistonfest

838 posts

138 months

[news] 
Tuesday 6th July 2004 quote quote all
"Pass the Numptie 'pon the Left Hand Side" will be available soon...........

iguana

6,018 posts

146 months

[news] 
Wednesday 7th July 2004 quote quote all
Pistonfest said:
"Pass the Numptie 'pon the Left Hand Side" will be available soon...........


What about the other 'Optimax' one Mr Fest??

jessica

6,307 posts

138 months

[news] 
Wednesday 7th July 2004 quote quote all
Bob the Planner said:
fantastic - that has really cheered me up . Off to the pub now to kill a few more brain cells.


WHAT U MEAN AFTER THE WEEKEND YOU GOT SOME LEFT :

you really must drink more next year.!

EmmaP

11,755 posts

125 months

[news] 
Wednesday 7th July 2004 quote quote all
Jeremyc you are a fantastic lyricist!

Loved the 'TVR Blues'. Sheer class. I'll have to learn the lyrics to 'Porsche Boxstaa' and sing it to my mate's hubbie. I'm sure he'll love it! Hee! Hee!

Can you sing all your songs at next year's bash as I think you'd go down a storm. Much better than one of the Friday night bands (a bit dodgy!!).

Keep up the good work!

EmmaP
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