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Thursday 31st May 2012

Chris Harris video: Merc G63

Plaything for oil barons and footballers or proper PH-worthy uber SUV? Harris finds out...



Quite what it is about the G63 that I find so appealing I cannot adequately explain. This is both annoying and potentially dangerous for someone who has made it his mission in life to ridicule most self-claiming 'high performance' SUVs. Really, it's the absurdity of the thing - rarely do you encounter a car that so obviously ignores the objective. When the man from AMG stood in front of us and with no sense of irony claimed some precise percentage improvement in fuel economy, I laughed. No one else did.

Our day with the car consisted of two main activities - trying to avoid the tragic congestion around Stuttgart and then working out how to disable the ESP system to allow the old tank the chance of laying down the odd tyre-chirp. We didn't want big drifts - they are a step too far in something like this - just some black lines.

Wrong, but lots of fun
Wrong, but lots of fun
This wasn't easy. First, I did the logical thing and pressed the ESP off button. The effect was a little less intervention, which wasn't too impressive given the meagre starting point - the G63's electronics call time earlier than any other car on sale. So, compelled to make the car do something a little more dynamic for the camera I contemplated my options, and through sneaky eyes pondered the bonnet release. In the olden days we might - and I stress might, just have unclipped the ABS control unit because that would disable the same wheel-speed sensors that feed the ESP its information. But I'm a little more adult these days, and I didn't fancy tugging wires in someone else's £120,000 SUV.

Instead I enlisted the services of Twitter, asking if anyone knew how to get what we used to call 'dyno' mode on these new machines. This has the same effect because it disables the sensors to allow the car to run on a rolling-road. Once again the brilliance of Twitter saved the day - someone sent me the procedure, it worked and the G63 finally had the chance to waste those Yokohamas.

And no, I shan't be repeating the details here. You'll have to find them for yourselves!

I could live with a G63 with clear glass and no badges because it would always make me smile. From 30mph to 130mph it has to be experienced to be believed.

Enjoy the vid!


 

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Author Discussion

gumsie

Original Poster:

515 posts

78 months

[news] 
Wednesday 30th May 2012 quote quote all
If I won the lottery tomorrow this is the first car on the list.

bigfoot7

280 posts

113 months

[news] 
Wednesday 30th May 2012 quote quote all
Fantastic video as usual and what a beast! I'd have one in my garage when the euromillions comes my way.

MattOz

3,011 posts

133 months

[news] 
Wednesday 30th May 2012 quote quote all
gumsie said:
If I won the lottery tomorrow this is the first car on the list.
+1 Absolutely love it. Utterly pointless, which makes it all the more desirable. biggrin

mrclav

333 posts

92 months

[news] 
Wednesday 30th May 2012 quote quote all
Love this. A good friend of mine has, as part of the perks of his job, been lent one of these by Merc themselves for six months - lucky so and so...

It's the most bizarre experience being thrown forward as rapidly by something like this especially when you know what it actually looks like aerodynamically.

It also sounds the dogs danglies.

benzito

1,056 posts

28 months

[news] 
Wednesday 30th May 2012 quote quote all
coolest car on the planet
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kazino

1,361 posts

87 months

[news] 
Wednesday 30th May 2012 quote quote all
Sheikh's car
coolest suv bar none

Johnboy Mac

2,666 posts

47 months

[news] 
Wednesday 30th May 2012 quote quote all
NUTS! Love it. I reckon back in '72 no one at M-B would have believed they'ed produce this or even the old G55. Well done Merc.

wackojacko

8,461 posts

59 months

[news] 
Wednesday 30th May 2012 quote quote all
Re badge as a diesel and go chav hunting hehe


Great video.

[AJ]

2,923 posts

67 months

[news] 
Wednesday 30th May 2012 quote quote all
Such a bonkers car, love it.

r1ch

2,180 posts

65 months

[news] 
Wednesday 30th May 2012 quote quote all
I'm no fan of 4x4's, but i have a soft spot for these. Really cool looking things. I think Brad Pitt has one, so it must be cool.

Phil Dicky

3,651 posts

132 months

[news] 
Wednesday 30th May 2012 quote quote all
wackojacko said:
Re badge as a diesel and go chav hunting hehe


Great video.
^^^^^. This smile

GTRene

7,763 posts

93 months

[news] 
Wednesday 30th May 2012 quote quote all
lovely fun car biggrin

nice video Chris, so now you tested a fast pretty heavy car...

when are you going to test drive the Dutch Donkervoort D8 GT, its more the opposite in weight, its light but fast and the closed version, very nice.

http://www.donkervoort.nl/en/donkervoort-cars/mode...

or their latest D8 GT0 with 5cill

http://www.donkervoort.nl/en/donkervoort-cars/mode...

donkervoort said:
A combination of beautiful shape, the latest auto techniques and the ultimate experience. With a capacity of 340 to 400 HP and a torque of 450 Nm from about 1600 RPMs. And all this with a total weight of around 700 kilos. Without a doubt one of the fastest sports cars on the European market
curious what you would think of those cars when tested.

0a

8,434 posts

63 months

[news] 
Wednesday 30th May 2012 quote quote all
All that money and it looks like it has no windscreen wash and wipe function.

Mouse1903

502 posts

22 months

[news] 
Wednesday 30th May 2012 quote quote all
gumsie said:
If I won the lottery tomorrow this is the first car on the list.
Can't disagree with this. Bloody awesome thing

Disco You

1,725 posts

49 months

[news] 
Wednesday 30th May 2012 quote quote all
Is there a car that says "I don't give a fk" any better than the G?

Cheib

6,214 posts

44 months

[news] 
Wednesday 30th May 2012 quote quote all
Must be Merc's most profitable car by a country mile.....40 year old design with an engine borrowed from elsewhere in the range.

I'd love to drive one but even if I win the lottery there are soooo many better ways to spend that money on four wheeled objects of desire.

Dave Hedgehog

5,320 posts

73 months

[news] 
Wednesday 30th May 2012 quote quote all
Harrys vid in the same car was better, sorry Monkey frown

DoctorX

1,214 posts

36 months

[news] 
Wednesday 30th May 2012 quote quote all
I think I prefer those basic ones in the photo at the start of the film. Would there be no market for a stripped out version? Nice car though.

2.5pi

311 posts

51 months

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Wednesday 30th May 2012 quote quote all
DoctorX said:
I think I prefer those basic ones in the photo at the start of the film. Would there be no market for a stripped out version? Nice car though.
That'd be the Defender smile

M@1975

445 posts

96 months

[news] 
Wednesday 30th May 2012 quote quote all
Love it, utterly nuts. Nuts=brilliant smile

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