One single thing that makes you think "knob" Vol 2
Discussion
vtecyo said:
thismonkeyhere said:
Europa1 said:
vtecyo said:
Sorry, try this one:
Nobody cares.
You care.Nobody cares.
(it's a care bear)
Thank you to 3 coach driving f
ktards on the M1 on Saturday...
fktard #1 - (National Express coach) indicate and pull out in one neat manoeuvre, unfortunately I was occupying the space he needed in quite poor conditions. !
fktard #2 - (another NE coach) obviously felt that his coach needed more than one lane, but only from time to time and so he was just inside the white line, then well over and then just inside again. !!
fktard #3 - obviously his coach was speshul as his off-side wheels were not allow to touch the cat's eyes... unfortunately for all concerned his off-side wheels were in lane 2. !!!
ktards on the M1 on Saturday...f
ktard #1 - (National Express coach) indicate and pull out in one neat manoeuvre, unfortunately I was occupying the space he needed in quite poor conditions. !f
ktard #2 - (another NE coach) obviously felt that his coach needed more than one lane, but only from time to time and so he was just inside the white line, then well over and then just inside again. !!f
ktard #3 - obviously his coach was speshul as his off-side wheels were not allow to touch the cat's eyes... unfortunately for all concerned his off-side wheels were in lane 2. !!! OpulentBob said:
Liquid Knight said:
Two Honda Civic's one standard Optimus Prime Helmet edition Type R and one Barry'd silver Civic C with a matte black tailgate, purple anodised lower rear subframe brace, cheap nasty back box, poorly fitted tyres, no suspension travel and small stuffed toy hanging off the rear tow hoop.
Along the 30 and 40 zones despite oncoming traffic both cars took "racing lines" around corners the Barry Boy nearly colliding head on two occasions. Get to the 60 zone and both sit at 45mph. A white van pulls out about a quarter of a mile in front of us and the Civics both blast their horns and tailgate through the next thirty zone.
The Type R pulls into a pub car park and the van pulls into the car park outside a shop. Despite having an exhaust that's about as discrete as a concrete tampon the Barry'd Civic takes off in the 30 zone, has to lock up to take the next corner (without signaling and only one brake light), about an eighth of a mile ahead of me he takes the next turn. When I get to that turn he's gone the length of a quarter mile straight bit so must have been doing at least 60 in the 30 zone (speed is distance over time I was doing 30 and Barry Boy covered twice the distance in the same time so therefore a minimum of twice my speed).
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LgEin42blfk
Dodgy link?Along the 30 and 40 zones despite oncoming traffic both cars took "racing lines" around corners the Barry Boy nearly colliding head on two occasions. Get to the 60 zone and both sit at 45mph. A white van pulls out about a quarter of a mile in front of us and the Civics both blast their horns and tailgate through the next thirty zone.
The Type R pulls into a pub car park and the van pulls into the car park outside a shop. Despite having an exhaust that's about as discrete as a concrete tampon the Barry'd Civic takes off in the 30 zone, has to lock up to take the next corner (without signaling and only one brake light), about an eighth of a mile ahead of me he takes the next turn. When I get to that turn he's gone the length of a quarter mile straight bit so must have been doing at least 60 in the 30 zone (speed is distance over time I was doing 30 and Barry Boy covered twice the distance in the same time so therefore a minimum of twice my speed).
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LgEin42blfk
Live on the Jools Holland show.
P.S Golf GTI TDI's are the worst. Almost as bad as Nissan Crashqui and Citroen Picasso's.
irocfan said:
Thank you to 3 coach driving fktards on the M1 on Saturday...
fktard #1 - (National Express coach) indicate and pull out in one neat manoeuvre, unfortunately I was occupying the space he needed in quite poor conditions. !
fktard #2 - (another NE coach) obviously felt that his coach needed more than one lane, but only from time to time and so he was just inside the white line, then well over and then just inside again. !!
fktard #3 - obviously his coach was speshul as his off-side wheels were not allow to touch the cat's eyes... unfortunately for all concerned his off-side wheels were in lane 2. !!!
Sounds about right. 'Elcock Reisen' are the coach of choice on my daily commute up and down the M54 - they've received a few emails over the past year or 2 concerning their drivers ktards on the M1 on Saturday...f
ktard #1 - (National Express coach) indicate and pull out in one neat manoeuvre, unfortunately I was occupying the space he needed in quite poor conditions. !f
ktard #2 - (another NE coach) obviously felt that his coach needed more than one lane, but only from time to time and so he was just inside the white line, then well over and then just inside again. !!f
ktard #3 - obviously his coach was speshul as his off-side wheels were not allow to touch the cat's eyes... unfortunately for all concerned his off-side wheels were in lane 2. !!! 
Stupid cow driving her focus through the village, hazards on doing 20mph, with a totally flat rear left tyre.
How she thought driving on it was in any way sensible instead of pulling over and getting the fking thing changed is beyond me.
Total bellend.
It's not the first car i've seen in the last few days driving on a flat tyre.
How she thought driving on it was in any way sensible instead of pulling over and getting the f
king thing changed is beyond me.Total bellend.
It's not the first car i've seen in the last few days driving on a flat tyre.
Tyre Tread said:
thismonkeyhere said:
Golf drivers.
It may be only only my commute, and I have no explnation for it, but I have learned to be very wary of Golfs due to aggressive behaviour.
Some other marques often stand out for a 'me first, me first' pseudo-Alpha male attitude, but not often agressive or dangerous.
Golfs, however
It may be only only my commute, and I have no explnation for it, but I have learned to be very wary of Golfs due to aggressive behaviour.
Some other marques often stand out for a 'me first, me first' pseudo-Alpha male attitude, but not often agressive or dangerous.
Golfs, however
Be particularly careful if it is adorned with a GTI or DTI badge
I got shouted at by a cyclist today when it was completely his fault. He was slightly faster than traffic, which was slowing to approach a set of lights on red, 2 lanes. He decided that as he had assumed that because he was undertaking everyone that it also would be save to veer across lanes without looking or signalling. Just as he was starting to do so he realised i was there and gave me some s
t, although he was wearing a bandana over his mouth so couldn't see or hear what he was saying. The dick. MarkRSi said:
thismonkeyhere and others said:
Golf drivers.
Blown2CV said:
MarkRSi said:
DervVW said:
is there soneone here whos brought a passat snotter and going around winding people in this thread up??
Hmmm Blown2CV has sometimes complained about the lack of quality rants on here... 
I've got a Golf!!A.J.M said:
Stupid cow driving her focus through the village, hazards on doing 20mph, with a totally flat rear left tyre.
How she thought driving on it was in any way sensible instead of pulling over and getting the fking thing changed is beyond me.
Total bellend.
It's not the first car i've seen in the last few days driving on a flat tyre.
What if she was very close to her house and there was someone there who could change it rather than potentially waiting for a recovery service. Don't be so judgmental when you aren't armed with all the facts...How she thought driving on it was in any way sensible instead of pulling over and getting the f
king thing changed is beyond me.Total bellend.
It's not the first car i've seen in the last few days driving on a flat tyre.
A.J.M said:
Stupid cow driving her focus through the village, hazards on doing 20mph, with a totally flat rear left tyre.
How she thought driving on it was in any way sensible instead of pulling over and getting the fking thing changed is beyond me.
Total bellend.
It's not the first car i've seen in the last few days driving on a flat tyre.
yeah seen a transit with a completely flat rear couple of days ago. it doesnt cost much to fix just people being lazy i guessHow she thought driving on it was in any way sensible instead of pulling over and getting the f
king thing changed is beyond me.Total bellend.
It's not the first car i've seen in the last few days driving on a flat tyre.
A few questions for the person occupying (I won't dignify what you were doing by calling it 'driving') dark blue Mondeo hatchback ML03XLJ northbound on the M1 through the J15A-19 roadworks on Sunday evening:
- Do you consider that a 50mph rather than 70mph limit means that you have sufficient reaction time on a damp, greasy motorway when you are consistently tailgating cars at a distance of somewhat less than 3 metres?
- Do you believe that abrupt and repeated swings from L1 to L3 and back, causing waves of panic braking and avoidance in your wake, constituted 'making progress'?
- Having swerved your way into L3 on one occasion to assume your usual position glued to the back bumper of the car in front, did you think that receiving a single flash of main beam from the car behind you (that you had just forced to brake to avoid you) was disproportionate? Is that why you then turned on and left on your rear fog lights to dazzle the driver behind you, because after all revenge is sweet and the wnker totes deserved it for messing with someone as magnificent as you?
- Were you late for the ceremony to present you with the 'Cckwad of the Year' award at the Total Fcking Cnt Convention 2014?
- Do you consider that a 50mph rather than 70mph limit means that you have sufficient reaction time on a damp, greasy motorway when you are consistently tailgating cars at a distance of somewhat less than 3 metres?
- Do you believe that abrupt and repeated swings from L1 to L3 and back, causing waves of panic braking and avoidance in your wake, constituted 'making progress'?
- Having swerved your way into L3 on one occasion to assume your usual position glued to the back bumper of the car in front, did you think that receiving a single flash of main beam from the car behind you (that you had just forced to brake to avoid you) was disproportionate? Is that why you then turned on and left on your rear fog lights to dazzle the driver behind you, because after all revenge is sweet and the w
nker totes deserved it for messing with someone as magnificent as you?- Were you late for the ceremony to present you with the 'C
ckwad of the Year' award at the Total Fcking Cnt Convention 2014?A.J.M said:
Stupid cow driving her focus through the village, hazards on doing 20mph, with a totally flat rear left tyre.
How she thought driving on it was in any way sensible instead of pulling over and getting the fking thing changed is beyond me.
Total bellend.
It's not the first car i've seen in the last few days driving on a flat tyre.
At least she was reasonably slow, and had hazard lights on, in a village.How she thought driving on it was in any way sensible instead of pulling over and getting the f
king thing changed is beyond me.Total bellend.
It's not the first car i've seen in the last few days driving on a flat tyre.
Not driving at 40mph on a NSL dual carriageway with a flat nearside rear.
Fiat Panda, driven by a grumpy looking late middle aged/elderly* asshat, with his wife in the passenger seat. I could see the flat tyre 6 cars ahead. It was easy to spot as I was in lane 1, he was in lane 2. As I was turning left at the upcoming roundabout, I managed to get alongside him in the queue for the red traffic light. I buzzed down the window, bade him buzz his down, to be met with a gruff "What!". So I pointed out his flat tyre, to which he replied (and I kid you not) "I know. f
k off!" There was no opportunity to reply, because his window was on it's way up and traffic was moving again. Me and the wife just stared at each other in disbelief. All that she could think of to break the silence was "charming".That was over a week ago, but I don't think I posted on here at the time.
One that had me thinking "knob!" (or more correctly, "knobettes") was our local midwives yesterday morning.
A gaggle of them were gathered near the bus stop outside Frimley Park Hospital, on strike, or some other form of 'industrial action'. No quarrel with that. I might not support their grievances, but it's their right to take action within the law after all.
What I did have a problem with was their placards. As I drove past after dropping the wife at work, around 0645hrs, one of them waved a cardboard sign at me which said...
Striking Midwife said:
Hoot if
your(sic) with
your Midwives!
your(sic) with
your Midwives!
Well. Pardon me for pointing this out, Midwives of Frimley Park, but it's not legal to sound a vehicle horn as anything other than a warning to other traffic of your presence on the road. It's an offence to sound a vehicle horn whilst stationary, and it's certainly an offence to sound the horn between 2330hrs and 0700hrs. http://www.legislation.gov.uk/uksi/1986/1078/regul... (for the avoidance of doubt).
Furthermore, as health care professionals, on strike or not, do you really think it is in the best interests of your patients, and those in other wards and departments, who are recovering from surgery or illness, and really ought not be disturbed from their rest by random morons sounding their horns (illegally) in support of your industrial action right outside the hospital?
As an added bonus, the five of them stood outside with placards would easily have put an 8 person lift over it's weight limit. Set an example, and lose some kilos, midwives!!
Muddle238 said:
Nominate myself. For leaving my wallet in my car at the airport, and not realising until I'd arrived in Spain. Being completely stuck without credit cards/cash/driving licence, I had to go back to retrieve it.
D'oh!!How did you manage to get back without cash/card to pay for a flight?
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