Family Guy lines

[Pupp]

There's a disturbance in the Fuzzy Clam...

[Bill Carr]

It's gon rain!

[slipstream 1985]

peaches are comming in mighty early this year,
"SMOKE"

[harry010]

"Bring me a shed for I am hungry"

[bigandclever]

Now I may be an idiot, but there is one thing I am not, sir, and that, sir, is an idiot.

[omgus]

It's in my Raccoon wounds!

[andy ted]

"may the Fonz be with you"

[ajprice]

So, is there any tread left on the tires? Or at this point would it be like throwing a hot dog down a hallway?

[JVaughan]

Peter - Huh... that's odd... I thought that would big news.

Brian - You thought what would be big news?

Peter - Well there seems to be an absence of a certain ornithological piece: a headline regarding mass awareness of a certain avian variety.

Brian - What are you talking about?

Peter: Oh have you not heard? It was my understanding that everyone had heard...

Brian - Heard what?

Stewie - Brian Don't!

Brian - OH WELL THE BIRD, BIRD, BIRD, BIRD BIRD IS THE WORD. OH WELL THE BIRD, BIRD, BIRD, BIRD BIRD IS THE WORD. OH WELL THE BIRD, BIRD, BIRD, BIRD BIRD IS THE WORD. OH WELL THE BIRD, BIRD, BIRD, BIRD BIRD IS THE WORD. BRIAN DON'T YOU KNOW ABOUT THE BIRD? WELL PETER IS GOING TO TELL YOU ABOUT THE BIRD. OH WELL THE BIRD, BIRD, BIRD, BIRD BIRD IS THE WORD. OH WELL THE BIRD.

[JVaughan]

"Butt Scratcher" !!!!

[Nedzilla]

Im gona go home and rub out a gigitty.

[Big Fat Fatty]

"(Peter laugh) Get outta here ya little bds, I knew this was the right thing to do"

"It's raining sideways!"

[Arun_D]

"POW! Right in the kisser"

[Big Raff]

Go away fat man!

[omgus]

Damn you vile woman!

[TackMEU]

Peter: Hey hey I got an idea. Lets play "I Never." You got to drink if you did the thing that the person says they never did.
Cleveland: Oh I got one, I never slept with a women with the lights on.
(They all drink.)
Joe: I'll go next, uh I never had sex with Cleveland's wife.
(Quagmire and Cleveland drink.)
Peter: alright lets see uh, I never did a chick in a Logan airport bathroom.
(Only Quagmire drinks.)

• **About 33 drinks later****

Peter: God lets see what else is there um...I never gave a reach-around to a spider monkey while reciting the Pledge of Alligence.
Quagmire: Oh God.
(Quagmire takes a drink.)
Joe: I uh I never picked up an illegal alien at Home Depot to take home a choke me while I touch myself.
Quagmire: Oh come on!
(Quagmire drinks again.)
Peter: I never did the same thing except with someone from Joann Fabrics.
Quagmire: Oh God this is ridiculous. You guys suck! (Drinks more and passes out.)

[TackMEU]

Auctioner: Our first item is a pair of panties confiscated from a prostitute.
Quagmire: Fifty bucks.
Auctioner: She had nine STDs.
Quagmire: Forty-five bucks.
Auctioner: And when we caught her she wet herself.
Quagmire: Fifty bucks.

[thesyn]

O J Simpson: Hi are you Peter Griffin?

Peter: That's my name don't put a knife in it.

[Arun_D]

Wacky Waving Inflatable Arm-Flailing Tubeman!
Wacky Waving Inflatable Arm-Flailing Tubeman!
Wacky Waving Inflatable Arm-Flailing Tubeman!

[The Hypno-Toad]

How's that novel coming along then?

Hey....HEY! Keep it down! You crazy Beatle.

BRIAN! DON'T!!!!

I don't wanna! I don't wanna!

Shut up Meg.