Best Smoker Barges 1-5 large [Vol 7]

[Baryonyx]

Blown2CV said:

In traffic?

Sick of looking at the ugly fker driving the car behind you picking their nose whilst you wait at the lights? Relief is only a button press away! It was also the ultimate snub before ditching a tailgater, and was also handy for cutting down on the low morning sun when driving to work on an early shift.

[Piersman2]

georgezippy said:

Blown2CV said:

do any of the thread massive actually own an XJ V12?

I used to have one, an '85 series 3 Sov HE. As already said, rust was the biggest issue. No issues ever with the engine, once I'd fixed the vacuum advance (easy DIY) it edged 20mpg on the motorway and made an epic noise when nailed. Gearbox sadly mismatched to the engine which is quite revvy yet the box with its paltry 3 speeds changes up way too early. Now have a nikasil 4.0 XJ8 which doesn't look or ride as nice, but is just better in so many other ways.
Still glad to have ticked the V12 box, and I'd say it's a better bet than a 4.2 which is prehistoric by comparison.

Edited by georgezippy on Saturday 22 November 15:42

I had a 1986 Series III 4.2, my first ever Jag. It had rust bubbles coming through at 4-5 years old all over it... I sold it after about 18 months. A year later I saw it in a pub carpark. My word, the rust had REALLY taken hold, it looked like it had been left in salt water, every panel was pretty well fecked beyond repair.

More recently I had a 1977 XJ 4.2C, it had had virtually all the panels replaced by someone previous to me, certainly the entire rear end from the rear window back was new metal.

What I'm saying is that these old Jags don't die through mechanical issues, they are relatively simple compared to modern cars... it's the dreaded cost of panels, welding and painting.

[JF87]

Baryonyx said:

It was also the ultimate snub before ditching a tailgater

I want one!

[2stis]

Ace-T said:

Never mind being an Alfa owner making you a true petrolhead, V12 ownership is where the big 'cahones' are at! You do realise we need pics now? And a readers wives rides thread?

Our 750 V12 is just so lovely and 'whooshy' like a turbine rather than a grunty engine. Is the Jag v12 similar?

Yes, the V12 experience is what did it for me - I'd never even thought about a Jag before but then someone posted a link to this one for sale and I just couldn't resist it for the powerplant

I do like the 750s (a friend had one from new) but with two BM barges in the stable already I thought it would get past the steering committee easier if it was a different make - and she has always been a fan of Jags so no resistance there in the end!

I think it probably is similar to what you suggest - most of my other cars are quicker but the way the V12 just effortlessly adds speed at bigger numbers without any need to drop a cog is an interesting experience to me.

FrankUnderwood said:

Pics please

In a word, what's it like?

It's in my garage at the moment as I am doing some inital fettling and detailing on it to get it up to my standards - too wet to take it out mid job but will post some pics as soon as it's ready.

Hard to sum it up in a single word, but if I had to do so then maybe 'majestic' would be apt. Sums up something with power and luxury (I know they already made a model with this name, but it's a good fit).

[brickwall]

Barge bought

So today I flew to Edinburgh, met Sam, and after (electronically) exchanging a few pieces of silver, I drove away in his 745i.

So smooth. So fast. So luxurious.

Apart from the satnav freezing 5 miles from home, it behaved faultlessly for the whole 500 miles, and the computer claims a pleasing 27.5mpg.

Tomorrow I shall take it to the car wash, then photos to follow.

[cptsideways]

Output Flange said:

JF87 said:

Comically awful supplementary photos, but looks decent enough for £4,375 if you like this sort of thing.


http://www.autotrader.co.uk/classified/advert/2014...

The issue being that literally no-one does like that sort of thing - universally slated when new and not much has improved since. Better ways to drive topless for the money.

However nothing seems to go wrong with them, unlike the other options. they hold their value pretty well too. This is the cheapest sensible one I've seen. Shame they are ugly!

[mccrackenj]

derin100 said:

8) I ended up repainting the wheels myself...twice! Top tip: If you are going to repaint BMW (and probably Merc wheels too) yourself just get the Würth paint and lacquer from the outset! And get the gun-thingy that fits the can, as it's worth it. The paint is so much better and the colour is right! I used the Autoglym stuff first off.It's just the wrong shade....too dark a grey.

:

I've done something like 8 or 9 sets of alloys over the last 3 years. The Autoglymn is utter sh!te. It's easy to use and goes on nicely, but the finish is very poor, almost gunmetal grey. And the can says it'll 'refinish' 25 wheels. bks! 1 can per 2 wheels IMO. The Wurth is much better, but again, you're doing very well to get a full set of 4 rims out of 1 can, need 2 really.

[mccrackenj]

cptsideways said:

Output Flange said:

JF87 said:

Comically awful supplementary photos, but looks decent enough for £4,375 if you like this sort of thing.


http://www.autotrader.co.uk/classified/advert/2014...

The issue being that literally no-one does like that sort of thing - universally slated when new and not much has improved since. Better ways to drive topless for the money.

However nothing seems to go wrong with them, unlike the other options. they hold their value pretty well too. This is the cheapest sensible one I've seen. Shame they are ugly!

Grotesque. Utterly gopping. I was in the local Lexus main dealer about a year ago (they also have franchises for loads of other stuff) and they had a brown one with caramel hood and cream leather. I was nearly ill just looking at it.

[Lowtimer]

derin100 said:

The rest of it, I think the Slideshow tells:

http://www.bmwclassics.co.uk/gallery/index.php?spg...

Lovely job.
What's that you use to treat the door seals?

[0a]

brickwall said:

Barge bought

So today I flew to Edinburgh, met Sam, and after (electronically) exchanging a few pieces of silver, I drove away in his 745i.

So smooth. So fast. So luxurious.

Apart from the satnav freezing 5 miles from home, it behaved faultlessly for the whole 500 miles, and the computer claims a pleasing 27.5mpg.

Tomorrow I shall take it to the car wash, then photos to follow.

Congratulations - take into account the lower cost of petrol and that's the same economy as SpeckledJim's E280 diesel

What route did you take South?

[anonymous-user]

RobinBanks said:

JF87 said:

Comically awful supplementary photos, but looks decent enough for £4,375 if you like this sort of thing.


http://www.autotrader.co.uk/classified/advert/2014...

Ooft.

You'd have to really not want a Mercedes SL or Jaguar XK.

The problem is that £4.5K will only buy you a comparatively ancient SL or XK where as that shape of SC was made up until 2010 with very light cosmetic tweaks. For the poser about town stick on a private plate and most people will probably think its a couple of years out of warranty by a few years. Try that with a R129 SL or X100 XK and people will probably ask if its eligible for free tax .

I feel bad for the SC430. The only tangible issues really being a bit bland in a market sector that has always been a bit bland and being very, very ugly. Oh, and its a posh Toyota, meaning it never had a chance in the UK.

[0a]

derin100 said:

E34

A fantastic job as usual Derin, there's something so right about the 525 E34, a lovely sweet combination of engine and car.

[derin100]

mccrackenj said:

derin100 said:

8) I ended up repainting the wheels myself...twice! Top tip: If you are going to repaint BMW (and probably Merc wheels too) yourself just get the Würth paint and lacquer from the outset! And get the gun-thingy that fits the can, as it's worth it. The paint is so much better and the colour is right! I used the Autoglym stuff first off.It's just the wrong shade....too dark a grey.

:

I've done something like 8 or 9 sets of alloys over the last 3 years. The Autoglymn is utter sh!te. It's easy to use and goes on nicely, but the finish is very poor, almost gunmetal grey. And the can says it'll 'refinish' 25 wheels. bks! 1 can per 2 wheels IMO. The Wurth is much better, but again, you're doing very well to get a full set of 4 rims out of 1 can, need 2 really.

Exactly!
The Autoglym stuff is ste! 25 wheels is bks.

With the Wurth stuff I did 4 wheels with 2 cans of paint; 2 cans of lacquer basically the second can of lacquer to spare....which I could have 'risked' to get a 'thicker' finish.

[derin100]

Lowtimer said:

derin100 said:

The rest of it, I think the Slideshow tells:

http://www.bmwclassics.co.uk/gallery/index.php?spg...

Lovely job.
What's that you use to treat the door seals?

It's this stuff:

http://www.ebay.co.uk/itm/Einszett-gummi-pflege-ru...


BMW used to sell a similar product but I think they stopped. Anyway, this stuff is good and handy to apply regulary and liberally I think.

[SpeckledJim]

0a said:

brickwall said:

Barge bought

So today I flew to Edinburgh, met Sam, and after (electronically) exchanging a few pieces of silver, I drove away in his 745i.

So smooth. So fast. So luxurious.

Apart from the satnav freezing 5 miles from home, it behaved faultlessly for the whole 500 miles, and the computer claims a pleasing 27.5mpg.

Tomorrow I shall take it to the car wash, then photos to follow.

Congratulations - take into account the lower cost of petrol and that's the same economy as SpeckledJim's E280 diesel

What route did you take South?

Thanks. Thanks very much. May your next poo be a pineapple.

[hornetrider]

SpeckledJim said:

Thanks. Thanks very much. May your next poo be a pineapple.

[0a]

SpeckledJim said:

Thanks. Thanks very much. May your next poo be a pineapple.

I'm sure you'll get it fixed

I did tank after tank in my old A8 4.2 with the worst at 13.9 mpg, the new owner found a sensor thingie was broken and managed to get it up beyond 25!

[Lowtimer]

derin100 said:

It's this stuff:
http://www.ebay.co.uk/itm/Einszett-gummi-pflege-ru...

Thanks, have picked up a couple of sticks.

[mccrackenj]

derin100 said:

mccrackenj said:

derin100 said:

8) I ended up repainting the wheels myself...twice! Top tip: If you are going to repaint BMW (and probably Merc wheels too) yourself just get the Würth paint and lacquer from the outset! And get the gun-thingy that fits the can, as it's worth it. The paint is so much better and the colour is right! I used the Autoglym stuff first off.It's just the wrong shade....too dark a grey.

:

I've done something like 8 or 9 sets of alloys over the last 3 years. The Autoglymn is utter sh!te. It's easy to use and goes on nicely, but the finish is very poor, almost gunmetal grey. And the can says it'll 'refinish' 25 wheels. bks! 1 can per 2 wheels IMO. The Wurth is much better, but again, you're doing very well to get a full set of 4 rims out of 1 can, need 2 really.

Exactly!
The Autoglym stuff is ste! 25 wheels is bks.

With the Wurth stuff I did 4 wheels with 2 cans of paint; 2 cans of lacquer basically the second can of lacquer to spare....which I could have 'risked' to get a 'thicker' finish.

Haven't looked at any of your thread yet Derin. I'm looking forward to doing that tomorrow!

[dbdb]

279 said:

RobinBanks said:

JF87 said:

Comically awful supplementary photos, but looks decent enough for £4,375 if you like this sort of thing.


http://www.autotrader.co.uk/classified/advert/2014...

Ooft.

You'd have to really not want a Mercedes SL or Jaguar XK.

The problem is that £4.5K will only buy you a comparatively ancient SL or XK where as that shape of SC was made up until 2010 with very light cosmetic tweaks. For the poser about town stick on a private plate and most people will probably think its a couple of years out of warranty by a few years. Try that with a R129 SL or X100 XK and people will probably ask if its eligible for free tax .

I feel bad for the SC430. The only tangible issues really being a bit bland in a market sector that has always been a bit bland and being very, very ugly. Oh, and its a posh Toyota, meaning it never had a chance in the UK.

I'm not sure why there is so little enthusiasm for these.
Sure, they're not particularly beautiful and are rather bland, but then so is the Lexus LS saloon - and quite a lot of people on PH seem to love them.

I'm sure the convertible will share the virtues of the LS - and at least the metal folding roof is a slight talking point. The only thing I could think of to say about the LS is there isn't much to say about it!