Wedding nonsense
Discussion
No problem with marriage, in fact one day I will get married... but the actual wedding day itself just fills me with dread.
I've been to about a million weddings this year and am thoroughly wedding'd out. The overriding feeling on these days is sheer boredom. Especially for church weddings. Then come the speeches which all together see me glazing over for the next hour whilst people try to be funny or say something gushing. I wish just once the FiL would stand up and say the groom is a t
t or something...just to spice it up.
On top of that, not one wedding was what you would call individual or different. They were all the bloody same and then there is the sheer nonsense added on top such as:
Comedy table center pieces so big you can't see the person you're trying to talk to across the table.
One wedding had two bands play
ridiculous amounts of food
Customised sweets with the event and names on and other daft "favors"/freebies.
An ice sculpture with the seating plan in it. Why? especially as the morning after we found it slung, unceremoniously, into a near by hedge.
Presents for kids who did the decent thing and kept schtum for 5 minutes during the ceremony as a well done.
videographers doing a "marryoke". Or in other words being forced against your wishes to sing and dance in front of a camera for the married couples later amusement. Not being extrovert in anyway, this was seriously uncomfortable for me.
Comedy custom t-shirts for the wedding party the day after
Holding it at some posh country house on the condition you get most of your guests to fork out £200 a night to stay there as well.
Starting at 12 and going on into the small hours...far to long.
A photobooth thingies that see most of the guests queuing outside of for the majority of the night. Or getting everyone a polaroid/dispoable to take gash, unusable pictures with. All of which will be at the dinner table.
A huge wedding cake + cup cakes + cheese + sweet stalls
the list goes on and on....like those planning these things are more bothered about the day and showing off than the event and actually getting married! All that extraneous fluff nonsense must cost a fortune!
And on top of the cost of your outfit (well I wore the same suit to all, but of course the OH couldn't be seen dead doing that), the extortionate hotel, the full tank of fuel for the round trip just to get there, they ask you to contribute to their honeymoon! Presumably because they just spanked all the cash on frivolous guff like flowers, a star light roof for the marquee and nice 3 course slap up meal for 100+.
Surely there are like minded people on here who want to regal me with tales of unnecessary wedding extravagance so I don't feel like I am the only one who thinks its insane???
I've been to about a million weddings this year and am thoroughly wedding'd out. The overriding feeling on these days is sheer boredom. Especially for church weddings. Then come the speeches which all together see me glazing over for the next hour whilst people try to be funny or say something gushing. I wish just once the FiL would stand up and say the groom is a t
t or something...just to spice it up.On top of that, not one wedding was what you would call individual or different. They were all the bloody same and then there is the sheer nonsense added on top such as:
Comedy table center pieces so big you can't see the person you're trying to talk to across the table.
One wedding had two bands play
ridiculous amounts of food
Customised sweets with the event and names on and other daft "favors"/freebies.
An ice sculpture with the seating plan in it. Why? especially as the morning after we found it slung, unceremoniously, into a near by hedge.
Presents for kids who did the decent thing and kept schtum for 5 minutes during the ceremony as a well done.
videographers doing a "marryoke". Or in other words being forced against your wishes to sing and dance in front of a camera for the married couples later amusement. Not being extrovert in anyway, this was seriously uncomfortable for me.
Comedy custom t-shirts for the wedding party the day after
Holding it at some posh country house on the condition you get most of your guests to fork out £200 a night to stay there as well.
Starting at 12 and going on into the small hours...far to long.
A photobooth thingies that see most of the guests queuing outside of for the majority of the night. Or getting everyone a polaroid/dispoable to take gash, unusable pictures with. All of which will be at the dinner table.
A huge wedding cake + cup cakes + cheese + sweet stalls
the list goes on and on....like those planning these things are more bothered about the day and showing off than the event and actually getting married! All that extraneous fluff nonsense must cost a fortune!
And on top of the cost of your outfit (well I wore the same suit to all, but of course the OH couldn't be seen dead doing that), the extortionate hotel, the full tank of fuel for the round trip just to get there, they ask you to contribute to their honeymoon! Presumably because they just spanked all the cash on frivolous guff like flowers, a star light roof for the marquee and nice 3 course slap up meal for 100+.
Surely there are like minded people on here who want to regal me with tales of unnecessary wedding extravagance so I don't feel like I am the only one who thinks its insane???
0000 said:
Otispunkmeyer said:
Then come the speeches which all together see me glazing over for the next hour whilst people try to be funny or say something gushing.
When you get there, do stick yours on youtube for us.Ours was nothing like that. Had it at my parents' house in Australia (which is enormous by UK standards, I guess, but my folks aren't ridiculously loaded), 60ish guests, a civil ceremony that was about 20 mins long and completely non-religious, heck it even had some HUMOUR in it...
The reception was a great big party. We'd decorated it ourselves (with my Mum's help), hired tables/chairs/plates/glasses etc and the catering was all done by me, Mum and my Nan. Short speeches, tasty buffet, plenty of booze, and a party that lasted til 3am.
Oh, and the ceremony was at 5pm, so it wasn't a ridiculously long night, either. The formalities were over by around 8.30 and if people needed to leave after that it wasn't a big deal, but most of them stuck around til at least midnight. That was the best part - no need to get out of the venue, we could party as long as we liked and then just crawl into bed.
Oh, and I wore a knee length red dress. Looked much better on me than a white one.
I guess the point is that we decided what WE wanted, what would reflect us and our family and friends, and went with that. It wasn't an expensive or overtly lavish wedding, but there was more than enough of everything that mattered.
Actually, it was a pretty epic day, and one we'll remember forever as being very happy.
The reception was a great big party. We'd decorated it ourselves (with my Mum's help), hired tables/chairs/plates/glasses etc and the catering was all done by me, Mum and my Nan. Short speeches, tasty buffet, plenty of booze, and a party that lasted til 3am.
Oh, and the ceremony was at 5pm, so it wasn't a ridiculously long night, either. The formalities were over by around 8.30 and if people needed to leave after that it wasn't a big deal, but most of them stuck around til at least midnight. That was the best part - no need to get out of the venue, we could party as long as we liked and then just crawl into bed.
Oh, and I wore a knee length red dress. Looked much better on me than a white one.
I guess the point is that we decided what WE wanted, what would reflect us and our family and friends, and went with that. It wasn't an expensive or overtly lavish wedding, but there was more than enough of everything that mattered.
Actually, it was a pretty epic day, and one we'll remember forever as being very happy.
speedysoprano said:
Ours was nothing like that. Had it at my parents' house in Australia (which is enormous by UK standards, I guess, but my folks aren't ridiculously loaded), 60ish guests, a civil ceremony that was about 20 mins long and completely non-religious, heck it even had some HUMOUR in it...
The reception was a great big party. We'd decorated it ourselves (with my Mum's help), hired tables/chairs/plates/glasses etc and the catering was all done by me, Mum and my Nan. Short speeches, tasty buffet, plenty of booze, and a party that lasted til 3am.
Oh, and the ceremony was at 5pm, so it wasn't a ridiculously long night, either. The formalities were over by around 8.30 and if people needed to leave after that it wasn't a big deal, but most of them stuck around til at least midnight. That was the best part - no need to get out of the venue, we could party as long as we liked and then just crawl into bed.
Oh, and I wore a knee length red dress. Looked much better on me than a white one.
I guess the point is that we decided what WE wanted, what would reflect us and our family and friends, and went with that. It wasn't an expensive or overtly lavish wedding, but there was more than enough of everything that mattered.
Actually, it was a pretty epic day, and one we'll remember forever as being very happy.
Sounds ideal as weddings go. For some of these I've been to I am sure there are games of keeping up with the jones' and one-upmanship going on.The reception was a great big party. We'd decorated it ourselves (with my Mum's help), hired tables/chairs/plates/glasses etc and the catering was all done by me, Mum and my Nan. Short speeches, tasty buffet, plenty of booze, and a party that lasted til 3am.
Oh, and the ceremony was at 5pm, so it wasn't a ridiculously long night, either. The formalities were over by around 8.30 and if people needed to leave after that it wasn't a big deal, but most of them stuck around til at least midnight. That was the best part - no need to get out of the venue, we could party as long as we liked and then just crawl into bed.
Oh, and I wore a knee length red dress. Looked much better on me than a white one.
I guess the point is that we decided what WE wanted, what would reflect us and our family and friends, and went with that. It wasn't an expensive or overtly lavish wedding, but there was more than enough of everything that mattered.
Actually, it was a pretty epic day, and one we'll remember forever as being very happy.
Otispunkmeyer said:
videographers doing a "marryoke". Or in other words being forced against your wishes to sing and dance in front of a camera for the married couples later amusement. Not being extrovert in anyway, this was seriously uncomfortable for me.
I've been to a wedding that had this. I fking hated it. 0000 said:
Otispunkmeyer said:
Then come the speeches which all together see me glazing over for the next hour whilst people try to be funny or say something gushing.
When you get there, do stick yours on youtube for us.
OP: If that is really how you feel, I suggest you shouldn't go to so many weddings, you moaning old
. 
HereBeMonsters said:
Agree about the "please contribute to our honeymoon" st though.
fk off. I'm not paying so you can go on holiday. If you need something that you will use for years to come, I will happily buy it for you, but you can pay for your own fking trip to the Seychelles or whatever.
Even that makes me cringe.t though.f
k off. I'm not paying so you can go on holiday. If you need something that you will use for years to come, I will happily buy it for you, but you can pay for your own fking trip to the Seychelles or whatever.My bro (who isn't wealthy and needed plenty at that stage of life), asked all who wished to make a gesture to put cash in an envelope and slip it in a box at the venue - it all went to Cancer research.
There was of course no obligation to do so.
5potTurbo said:
0000 said:
Otispunkmeyer said:
Then come the speeches which all together see me glazing over for the next hour whilst people try to be funny or say something gushing.
When you get there, do stick yours on youtube for us.OP: If that is really how you feel, I suggest you shouldn't go to so many weddings, you moaning old
. I've already told her if she wants me to get married any time soon.... don't goad me into anymore weddings. The more I go to the less I want to go to my own.
I'm getting married 3 weeks on Saurday and I can see where the OP is coming from to a degree, it's a known formula the venues, caterers want to follow. The other stuff like band/acts and photobooths are all independent but again will follow what the venue wants them to do.
Ours isn't following the usual format, wedding at 4 then one big party into the wee small hours, whoevers there at the wedding will be there in the evening also.. Our venue seems happy enough with this, they should be as it's costing a small fortune and they actually come better off in the deal as it isn't a full day.
No photobooth, no disposable cameras (everyone has a smartphone now) so breaking that mould.
You wait until you decide to get married, you'll spend a year planning with the OT believe me and sometimes it's easier to be guided down the usual route by the venue - path of least resistence etc etc
Ours isn't following the usual format, wedding at 4 then one big party into the wee small hours, whoevers there at the wedding will be there in the evening also.. Our venue seems happy enough with this, they should be as it's costing a small fortune and they actually come better off in the deal as it isn't a full day.
No photobooth, no disposable cameras (everyone has a smartphone now) so breaking that mould.
You wait until you decide to get married, you'll spend a year planning with the OT believe me and sometimes it's easier to be guided down the usual route by the venue - path of least resistence etc etc
Loved my wedding day from start to finish.
Lots of friends as we only have very small families, registry office then off in a Facel Vega to the venue, champagne reception, good food, then good music in the evening as a mate did the music, and a free bar.
Didn't cost the Earth and everybody said they had a brilliant day.
Marryoke indeed.
Lots of friends as we only have very small families, registry office then off in a Facel Vega to the venue, champagne reception, good food, then good music in the evening as a mate did the music, and a free bar.
Didn't cost the Earth and everybody said they had a brilliant day.
Marryoke indeed.
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