Good Friends Owing Money
Discussion
20+ years ago, my brother asked to borrow some money from me. I lent him £250 which I had been saving to buy a decent CD player. It was a lot of money to me at the time.
Several months later, I hadn’t heard from him, so I went round to his flat and asked for the money back. He walked towards me, got right in my face, glared at me and said ”I haven’t got it. What are you going to do about it?”
I said nothing, turned round & walked out. We haven’t spoken since.
I no longer lend money to friends and family.
Several months later, I hadn’t heard from him, so I went round to his flat and asked for the money back. He walked towards me, got right in my face, glared at me and said ”I haven’t got it. What are you going to do about it?”
I said nothing, turned round & walked out. We haven’t spoken since.
I no longer lend money to friends and family.
I organised my brothers stag do earlier this year, for 20 lads some of whom I'd not met before. I paid for everything up front and was at one point nearly £3,000 out of pocket. It took a long time, people backed out, but in the end everyone paid me what they owed me, even one guy I'd never met who backed out the whole thing (£150 down for him). Decent people will pay you. If they don't they're not worth stress/time/effort.
heppers75 said:
I lent a friend £1k several months ago... I know he can be a bit flaky but he is for a most part a decent guy....
I have not seen a penny of it back yet and I am honestly not expecting to now!
This, if you are doing this you need to go into it with your eyes open, you have to weigh up the character and value of said friend as well.I have not seen a penny of it back yet and I am honestly not expecting to now!
Just had a 'friend' ring me up in a panic and ask to borrow £1500 for two weeks. Seems the bailiffs were there at the time for an unpaid tax bill.
Many years ago I did lend this 'friend' quite a bit to buy a car and he paid me back at £50 a week, reliably.
Since then, he's borrowed money from his parents, his brother, his girlfriends parents and repaid absolutley none of it. I felt a right b
d, but I declined to advance him the cash. I know I'll never see it again and I can't afford to lose that amount.
Many years ago I did lend this 'friend' quite a bit to buy a car and he paid me back at £50 a week, reliably.
Since then, he's borrowed money from his parents, his brother, his girlfriends parents and repaid absolutley none of it. I felt a right b
d, but I declined to advance him the cash. I know I'll never see it again and I can't afford to lose that amount.Staplebug said:
All,
This probably seems petty but its really bugging me.
To sum it up:
Group of blokes go camping every Nov. Just for one night to drink and get away from the wife and kids.
I booked and paid for everything in Aug.
3 of the guys have backed out today (and 2 done the same last year)
Its only £15pp so I am only down £45.
I have text the guys explaining that I am now out of pocket £45 and they need to pay and they basically said "yeah, I'll sort you out next time" which basically means that's its not going to happen.
How would you guys handle it?
De friend them on fbThis probably seems petty but its really bugging me.
To sum it up:
Group of blokes go camping every Nov. Just for one night to drink and get away from the wife and kids.
I booked and paid for everything in Aug.
3 of the guys have backed out today (and 2 done the same last year)
Its only £15pp so I am only down £45.
I have text the guys explaining that I am now out of pocket £45 and they need to pay and they basically said "yeah, I'll sort you out next time" which basically means that's its not going to happen.
How would you guys handle it?
I've lent my mate 3k once to buy a family sized car..I knew he was skint at the time and on basic wage.so agreed to let him pay me back around £100 month Till he paid it of...he has paid me back 2 yrs worth so far .and asked last week for another £500 to buy some Xmas presents I was happy to due to him keeping up our agreement..
Council Baby, your thread is here. 
Petrolhead95 said:
I'm in the same situation with one of my best friends; she owes me £48 but I'm yet to see any of it two months later. Normally it wouldn't bother me but as I'm saving up for a Corsa VXR, I need every penny possible.
If £48 is going to make all the difference, perhaps you should consider a cheaper car? 
ColinM50 said:
Had a good mate get into some money problem and he asked me to lend him £2k and he'd pay me back in a month. I told him I didn't have it but could let him have £500.
Month goes by and I ask him for the £500 back and he says he's still waiting for me to stump up the other £1500 and what sort of mate am I for asking for money that he doesn't owe me? Another month goes by and I ask him again for the £500 and he denies all knowledge and tells our other mates how I'm always on at him to borrow money. Upshot is he's no longer a mate and if I pass him in the street he just blanks me. thunt
Complete and utter cock socket! My morals wouldnt let me do that.Month goes by and I ask him for the £500 back and he says he's still waiting for me to stump up the other £1500 and what sort of mate am I for asking for money that he doesn't owe me? Another month goes by and I ask him again for the £500 and he denies all knowledge and tells our other mates how I'm always on at him to borrow money. Upshot is he's no longer a mate and if I pass him in the street he just blanks me. thunt
Get better friends? Among my group of mates, it may take a while but it always gets paid back. I sold a project car to a mate last year, still owed something, think it's about £150-200ish, not worried when, I know I'll get it back and it got me out of a fix. But then I did pressure him to buy it, I knew he wanted it wouldn't have the money so I offered to give him time to pay.
Bradgate said:
20+ years ago, my brother asked to borrow some money from me. I lent him £250 which I had been saving to buy a decent CD player. It was a lot of money to me at the time.
Several months later, I hadn’t heard from him, so I went round to his flat and asked for the money back. He walked towards me, got right in my face, glared at me and said ”I haven’t got it. What are you going to do about it?”
I said nothing, turned round & walked out. We haven’t spoken since.
I suspect that £250 has saved you 20+ years of grief and general aggravation. And for less than a pound a month. Absolute stonking bargain. Several months later, I hadn’t heard from him, so I went round to his flat and asked for the money back. He walked towards me, got right in my face, glared at me and said ”I haven’t got it. What are you going to do about it?”
I said nothing, turned round & walked out. We haven’t spoken since.
TwigtheWonderkid said:
Bradgate said:
20+ years ago, my brother asked to borrow some money from me. I lent him £250 which I had been saving to buy a decent CD player. It was a lot of money to me at the time.
Several months later, I hadn’t heard from him, so I went round to his flat and asked for the money back. He walked towards me, got right in my face, glared at me and said ”I haven’t got it. What are you going to do about it?”
I said nothing, turned round & walked out. We haven’t spoken since.
I suspect that £250 has saved you 20+ years of grief and general aggravation. And for less than a pound a month. Absolute stonking bargain. Several months later, I hadn’t heard from him, so I went round to his flat and asked for the money back. He walked towards me, got right in my face, glared at me and said ”I haven’t got it. What are you going to do about it?”
I said nothing, turned round & walked out. We haven’t spoken since.
Still makes me sad that people can be such monumental bell ends, especially to someone who helped them.
We're a selfish species by nature.
I leant my brother 12k a few years ago to help him out of a hole. He promised to "pay me when he could" and I never mentioned it again.
He needed it, I had it, we helped each other out. Three years later I had not seen a penny, no interest, no repayment, he had mentioned it a few times that he would repay it and I mentally wrote it off as not going to happen.
One day got a text message asking for bank details, and later that day, 3 and a half years after lending the money £16k appeared in my bank account.
Not everyone is a git, and generally if you know someone well enough, trust them, and maintain a relationship where that trust is retained people will put things right when they can.
Some people are just tossers though, and we have all been caught out by a few of them.
He needed it, I had it, we helped each other out. Three years later I had not seen a penny, no interest, no repayment, he had mentioned it a few times that he would repay it and I mentally wrote it off as not going to happen.
One day got a text message asking for bank details, and later that day, 3 and a half years after lending the money £16k appeared in my bank account.
Not everyone is a git, and generally if you know someone well enough, trust them, and maintain a relationship where that trust is retained people will put things right when they can.
Some people are just tossers though, and we have all been caught out by a few of them.
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