Ladies of the night using my car park - deterrents?

Ladies of the night using my car park - deterrents?

Author
Discussion

pinchmeimdreamin

9,831 posts

217 months

Tuesday 3rd March 2015
quotequote all
Monkeylegend said:
hedgefinder said:
just put a sign up stating that the site is has video surveillance and that all registration numbers are taken on entry..
What you men like

"Is it in yet"
"Yep can't you feel it"
"Oh yes I can, now what's you registration?"
How about on of these.


Rude-boy

22,227 posts

232 months

Tuesday 3rd March 2015
quotequote all
Edit to add:- LOVE that idea smile ^^^^^^^


TheInternet said:
hedgefinder said:
just put a sign up stating that the site is has video surveillance and that all registration numbers are taken on entry..
Fake cameras and real signs can only help, however due to the location you can't really put them in a useful place.

Floodlights have been used before in similar locations but would need approval from the other residents.
Unless they are punters or already filming proceedings I doubt anyone with a ready electricity supply and fixing point will object to a motion activated flood light.

Failing that once the less likely to get their bounces bounced locals have knocked on enough windows the toms will soon find somewhere with less aggravation.

You could call the Police but in the grand scheme of things they've got more important things to do with their limited resources.

IanMorewood

4,309 posts

247 months

Tuesday 3rd March 2015
quotequote all
Parking enforcement notices, mark the bay with residents only, sign saying all none resident parking will be charged at £50 per hour, pursued via dvla to the registered keepers address? All follow up correspondence addressed to Mrs X? Don't forget the high resolution photos from two angles showing two people parking up and leaving 10-15mins later.

I reckon on a busy night you could earn far more than the hookers.

Axionknight

8,505 posts

134 months

Tuesday 3rd March 2015
quotequote all
Unless people throw your invoices in the bin...... Which I'm guessing they would.

awooga

358 posts

133 months

Tuesday 3rd March 2015
quotequote all
Slingshot and ball bearings through the door skins / side windows of the car from a safe distance?

1878

821 posts

162 months

Tuesday 3rd March 2015
quotequote all
JDMDrifter said:
Wait for them to turn up, hide in bush. As they begin pepper the car with paintballs? What they're doing is illegal so they aren't really gonna report you are they? laugh
hehe

Squawk1066

2,939 posts

170 months

Tuesday 3rd March 2015
quotequote all
Put a banana up a few exhausts, Axel Foley style. Sit back, watch and chuckle.

miroku

261 posts

152 months

Tuesday 3rd March 2015
quotequote all
Clamping?

Impasse

15,099 posts

240 months

Tuesday 3rd March 2015
quotequote all
miroku said:
Clamping?
Some people would pay extra for a bit of Fifty Shades naughtiness. I think the idea is to deter such types, not encourage them.

mybrainhurts

90,809 posts

254 months

Tuesday 3rd March 2015
quotequote all


Boom...

CB2152

1,555 posts

132 months

Tuesday 3rd March 2015
quotequote all
Find an impressionist who's willing to hide nearby and narrate the actions of the couples through a loudspeaker/megaphone. Preferably in the voice and style of David Attenborough.

CC07 PEU

2,297 posts

203 months

Wednesday 4th March 2015
quotequote all
Have you thought of hiring an American marching band that could start playing once the nocturnal shenanigans commence?

mybrainhurts

90,809 posts

254 months

Wednesday 4th March 2015
quotequote all

elanfan

5,516 posts

226 months

Wednesday 4th March 2015
quotequote all
Put up a board and start recording the car registrations on there. Put up a header stating these vehicles are being reported to the Police. Make it where it can be clearly seen and I doubt any punters would want that.

DanielSan

18,745 posts

166 months

Wednesday 4th March 2015
quotequote all
Council Baby said:
What can I say?

The OP sees a problem, I see opportunity wink
It's hard not to admire the positivity I won't lie.

mph1977

12,467 posts

167 months

Wednesday 4th March 2015
quotequote all
CB2152 said:
Find an impressionist who's willing to hide nearby and narrate the actions of the couples through a loudspeaker/megaphone. Preferably in the voice and style of David Attenborough.
excellent - i assume you've seen cassetteboys video of attenborough narrating over some kind of clubbing / 'night time environment' film

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dXZ-ijNAFVM

Edited by mph1977 on Wednesday 4th March 00:57

IanUAE

2,927 posts

163 months

Wednesday 4th March 2015
quotequote all
hedgefinder said:
just put a sign up stating that the site is has video surveillance and that all registration numbers are taken on entry..
laugh

S10GTA

12,645 posts

166 months

Wednesday 4th March 2015
quotequote all
Knock on the window and undercut said lady of the night. Enjoy extra money.

HD Adam

5,143 posts

183 months

Wednesday 4th March 2015
quotequote all
OP

Get yourself an outfit like this



and get yourself one of these



Park up at the entrance and take your commission for services rendered.

CB2152

1,555 posts

132 months

Wednesday 4th March 2015
quotequote all
mph1977 said:
CB2152 said:
Find an impressionist who's willing to hide nearby and narrate the actions of the couples through a loudspeaker/megaphone. Preferably in the voice and style of David Attenborough.
excellent - i assume you've seen cassetteboys video of attenborough narrating over some kind of clubbing / 'night time environment' film

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dXZ-ijNAFVM

Edited by mph1977 on Wednesday 4th March 00:57
laugh I hadn't seen that, no. Very good!