Skeletons emerging from closet...

Skeletons emerging from closet...

TOPIC CLOSED
TOPIC CLOSED
Author
Discussion

Harry Flashman

Original Poster:

19,283 posts

241 months

Tuesday 9th January 2007
quotequote all
Right, a Flashman situation for you lovelies.

Have just received confirmation that I am being dragged along to meet OH’s neurotic, insecure and bonkers mate. This girl is a royal pain in the ar5e, but hot (sadly – this is where the problem comes in). She has told OH that there’s something she ‘really wants to say’. This girl, Caroline, doesn’t know I am coming along – OH has invited me but not bothered to tell C this. After all, whatever C has to tell her, it’s not going to be about me…

Unfortunately, OH is wrong on this one. I know what this is. I did the nasty with her in May last year, very shortly before I got together with OH. OH does not know this, and C has kept quiet about it so far (but hasn’t seen either of us since the summer). Now for some reason, I reckon that she’s suddenly got the urge to be truthful and open about it all. This is a problem for me as OH has stated that she has issues with Caroline (girly nonsense but the kind of girly nonsense that means finding out your boyfriend has bonked your friend will cause issues) and I have a feeling that this knowledge could make things difficult. Problem is, I have no excuse and cannot claim I didn’t know this – OH was my best friend for years and I knew full well that there were issues between the two of them. I got drunk and doinked Caroline anyway. A couple of times, actually. And OH will be even crosser for me not telling her in my capacity as best friend pre our being together – my silence implies guilt and knowledge that what I was doing was wrong. Which is absolutely true – she will have me bang to rights.

Basically, I’m screwed. Options:

- turn up, hope that my presence embarrasses C into keeping schtum
- don’t turn up, hide in my home, turn phone off, simply avoid the storm
- turn up, take moral high ground i.e. “you knew that there was chemistry between me and the GF and yet you still got me drunk and seduced me, you manipulative conniving harpy etc etc”. Problem is I nailed her on more than one occasion, and playing the victim doesn’t suit as all parties concerned know I am no angel
- make point to GF that this was before we went out, and so none of her business. Blatantly not true as we were sizing each other up and pretty much in the prelude to getting together when I decided that bonking Caroline would be a sensible plan (fool, fool, fool!!)
- call Caroline before our drinks tonight and tell her that if she tells, I will make damned sure that absolutely everyone knows that she likes being tied up, gagged, spanked and taken in an, erm, alternative, manner. Problem is if she still tells, and discloses the threat I made, I am going to look like a properly evil sod (and a dirty evil sod to boot)
- Simply spend the entire night staring at C’s (lovely) boobies and dribbling absent mindedly

Whatever happens, I see a storm breaking. Flashy caught in the middle, again.

xiphias

5,888 posts

226 months

Tuesday 9th January 2007
quotequote all
Threesome.

pdV6

16,442 posts

260 months

Tuesday 9th January 2007
quotequote all
Harry Flashman said:

- Simply spend the entire night staring at C’s (lovely) boobies and dribbling absent mindedly

yes The only sensible option.
Harry Flashman said:

Flashy caught in the middle, again.

If you play your cards right...

Phil Hopkins

17,110 posts

216 months

Tuesday 9th January 2007
quotequote all
Simple:

Emigrate to California and 'doink' your fit cousin instead. Less hassle.

Fidgits

17,202 posts

228 months

Tuesday 9th January 2007
quotequote all
meh.

Just go along, wait for it to come out, and say, "since i've had you both individually, how about together?"

Worst case, they refuse and it puts things into perspective for the missues!

-JUT-

1,273 posts

212 months

Tuesday 9th January 2007
quotequote all
You could bite the bullet and tell your other half before tonight... you'll kick yourself if this "must tell" news isn't in fact what you think it is...

Failing that, I favour the ogling the baps option...

Harry Flashman

Original Poster:

19,283 posts

241 months

Tuesday 9th January 2007
quotequote all
Thought of the suggesting a threesome option, but realised that I will, in fact, be killed if I were to dare.

Oh bugger

Mahatma Bag

27,427 posts

278 months

Tuesday 9th January 2007
quotequote all
Are they cousins?

beccaviola

9,932 posts

210 months

Tuesday 9th January 2007
quotequote all
Get your oar in first. Tell OH before C has a chance to twist it all.

Good luck...

nervous

24,050 posts

229 months

Tuesday 9th January 2007
quotequote all
do nothing.

in my experience, youre always wrong H

always let the wave break before paddling.

graham@edinburgh

26,553 posts

224 months

Tuesday 9th January 2007
quotequote all
[Sensible Answer Alert]

Fess up now, ie before Caroline can dump you in it.

You've no way out, it's damage limitation time - you're still going to look crap by only bringing it up now because you thought Caroline was going to, but it's marginally better than your OH hearing it from her.

You do, of course, run the slight risk that this isn't what this meeting's about and causing a shitstorm for no reason

(note to self - type more concisely and quicker)

Edited by graham@edinburgh on Tuesday 9th January 16:29

scotal

8,751 posts

278 months

Tuesday 9th January 2007
quotequote all
Only option, tough it out. Adopt a "it was before we were together, so it has no bearing on our relationship" stance. Suggest you don't mention the GF's mate likes it up the wrong 'un, or that you want to do your califonian cousin the same way to avoid monger kids....

anonymous-user

53 months

Tuesday 9th January 2007
quotequote all
-JUT- said:
You could bite the bullet and tell your other half before tonight... you'll kick yourself if this "must tell" news isn't in fact what you think it is...


Go on Flashy honesty is the best policy hehe

Then tell us what happens . . .


Edited by stovey on Tuesday 9th January 16:30

fido

16,752 posts

254 months

Tuesday 9th January 2007
quotequote all
Yep, i second that, own up to your OH before she does. Otherwise it'll be hanging over you forever... Look at this as a 'damage limitation' exercise. You'll will at least preserve some of your credibility. If you go about it in the right way, it might make C look like the spoiler in all this.

edited: soz, i seem to have said the same thing as Graham - but heck that's confirmation that it's the RIGHT THING TO DO! good luck.

Edited by fido on Tuesday 9th January 16:31

wolves_wanderer

12,356 posts

236 months

Tuesday 9th January 2007
quotequote all
Just go along, enjoy the ogle and if C spills the beans then simply tell your missus that it was before you got together and meant so little that you never saw the point in telling her, even as a friend.

The news may well not be what you think it is, and even if it was then she may not be so keen to tell with the "pipe cleaner" sitting opposite.

Harry Flashman

Original Poster:

19,283 posts

241 months

Tuesday 9th January 2007
quotequote all
beccaviola said:
Get your oar in first. Tell OH before C has a chance to twist it all.

Good luck...



Can’t discuss with OH. OH is at school so I cannot reach her (voicemail or text only, which seems like a bad way of disclosing). Meeting C straight after classes – I am to join when I get out of work.

risotto

3,926 posts

211 months

Tuesday 9th January 2007
quotequote all
Go along - it might put her off spilling the beans, and if it doesn't, you'll at least be there to defend yourself (if you can!)

Fidgits

17,202 posts

228 months

Tuesday 9th January 2007
quotequote all
beccaviola said:
Get your oar in first. Tell OH before C has a chance to twist it all.

Good luck...

or better still, twist it to your way...

"I think C is going to tell you that I slept with her last year before we started dating, however the truth is..

a. She seduced me while i was drunk and i was so ashamed i couldnt tell you
b. It was a pitty shag as she was so depressed, i hated it and was physcially sick afterwards, which is why i couldnt tell you
c. I was single, she was single, we were consenting adults, deal with it.

"

Harry Flashman

Original Poster:

19,283 posts

241 months

Tuesday 9th January 2007
quotequote all
OH is a teacher, before any of you start with your amusing comments, by the way.

Harry Flashman

Original Poster:

19,283 posts

241 months

Tuesday 9th January 2007
quotequote all
nervous said:
do nothing.

in my experience, youre always wrong H

always let the wave break before paddling.


This is what instinct is telling me. Still need a plan though.
TOPIC CLOSED
TOPIC CLOSED