Alonso could reunite with McLaren
Discussion
Hell - stranger things have happened this season !!
Speculation surrounding Fernando Alonso's uncertain future has taken yet another sharp turn.
The Spanish newspaper Diario AS claims that, despite their recent unhappy split, McLaren has joined the race to accommodate the 26-year-old Spaniard in 2008.
Honda has seemingly dropped out of the running, but Renault, Red Bull and Toyota are thought to have presented Alonso with standing offers for next season and beyond - with none willing to accept his demands for a single-season deal.
AS reports that McLaren has reopened the lines of communication with Alonso's management after Spanish team sponsors reacted badly to news of the split after just one year of collaboration.
Almost unbelievably, McLaren is now considered a real contender to welcome Alonso back to the Mercedes-powered team for 2008, due to Ron Dennis' similar desire for a merely one year contract.
AS claims the response from Alonso's camp so far has been composed, followed by the presentation to McLaren of a list of conditions, such as the freedom to determine independent race strategies.
But with Ron Dennis still in charge of the team, the newspaper speculates that a reunion is "unlikely.'
Speculation surrounding Fernando Alonso's uncertain future has taken yet another sharp turn.
The Spanish newspaper Diario AS claims that, despite their recent unhappy split, McLaren has joined the race to accommodate the 26-year-old Spaniard in 2008.
Honda has seemingly dropped out of the running, but Renault, Red Bull and Toyota are thought to have presented Alonso with standing offers for next season and beyond - with none willing to accept his demands for a single-season deal.
AS reports that McLaren has reopened the lines of communication with Alonso's management after Spanish team sponsors reacted badly to news of the split after just one year of collaboration.
Almost unbelievably, McLaren is now considered a real contender to welcome Alonso back to the Mercedes-powered team for 2008, due to Ron Dennis' similar desire for a merely one year contract.
AS claims the response from Alonso's camp so far has been composed, followed by the presentation to McLaren of a list of conditions, such as the freedom to determine independent race strategies.
But with Ron Dennis still in charge of the team, the newspaper speculates that a reunion is "unlikely.'
Hmmmmm..
I have a feeling that conversation might go something like this,
"Right Ferdie, here are the conditions for you coming back. They are non negotiable:
1.) You are number two to Lewis at all times
2.) You will not talk to the Spanish media
3.) You will not talk to Flav
4.) In fact screw 2 & 3, you will not talk to ANYONE! Or have a mobile.....or e mail..... or a voice recorder.....or two tin cans and some string......nothing.
5.) Ref 1.) your overalls will not have any sponsorship badges at all, they will just have the phrase, "I'm a giant number two!" written on them in the style of those 80s Frankie T-shirts....and so will your nomex underwear......& the cap you have to wear on the podium....
6.) If Lewis wants to speak to you, you will start each reply with the words "Yes Master Lewis,"
7.) Every morning you have to lick workshop floor clean wit'tongue and pay me threpence a week for privilege.
8.) You will share your hotel room at every away race with Ralf Schumacher.....in bunk beds....in cotton pjs.....with little drawings of go karts all over them......
9.) If you do anything that means that Ferrari win a race or even score an extra point I reserve the right to make you perform oral sex on Jane Goody.....with everyone watching.....including your mum....
10.) Every time we have a meeting you will knell and kiss my ring....and you will kiss my ring....oh yes you will kiss my ring!.......YOU WILL KISS MY RING AND BE GRATEFUL!!.....YOU'LL NEED KNEEPADS SEWN INTO YOUR RACESUIT COS YOU'LL BE KISSING MY RING SO OFTEN!!!......Kiss my ring, Ferdie!!!!......KISS MY RING MY LITTLE SPANISH FOOL!!!!!.......KISS MY RING!!!!!!
hahahahaahahahahahahhaahahahahahahahhahahaahahahahahahahahahahah
hahahahhahhahahhaahhahahahahahahhaahhahahahaahahahahhahahaahaahha
haahhahahahahahhahahahahahahahahhahahhahahhahahhahahahahahahaha
hahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahhaahahhahaahaha!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHA
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAAAHHHAHA
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAH
HHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Any questions?"
I have a feeling that conversation might go something like this,"Right Ferdie, here are the conditions for you coming back. They are non negotiable:
1.) You are number two to Lewis at all times
2.) You will not talk to the Spanish media
3.) You will not talk to Flav
4.) In fact screw 2 & 3, you will not talk to ANYONE! Or have a mobile.....or e mail..... or a voice recorder.....or two tin cans and some string......nothing.
5.) Ref 1.) your overalls will not have any sponsorship badges at all, they will just have the phrase, "I'm a giant number two!" written on them in the style of those 80s Frankie T-shirts....and so will your nomex underwear......& the cap you have to wear on the podium....
6.) If Lewis wants to speak to you, you will start each reply with the words "Yes Master Lewis,"
7.) Every morning you have to lick workshop floor clean wit'tongue and pay me threpence a week for privilege.
8.) You will share your hotel room at every away race with Ralf Schumacher.....in bunk beds....in cotton pjs.....with little drawings of go karts all over them......
9.) If you do anything that means that Ferrari win a race or even score an extra point I reserve the right to make you perform oral sex on Jane Goody.....with everyone watching.....including your mum....
10.) Every time we have a meeting you will knell and kiss my ring....and you will kiss my ring....oh yes you will kiss my ring!.......YOU WILL KISS MY RING AND BE GRATEFUL!!.....YOU'LL NEED KNEEPADS SEWN INTO YOUR RACESUIT COS YOU'LL BE KISSING MY RING SO OFTEN!!!......Kiss my ring, Ferdie!!!!......KISS MY RING MY LITTLE SPANISH FOOL!!!!!.......KISS MY RING!!!!!!
hahahahaahahahahahahhaahahahahahahahhahahaahahahahahahahahahahah
hahahahhahhahahhaahhahahahahahahhaahhahahahaahahahahhahahaahaahha
haahhahahahahahhahahahahahahahahhahahhahahhahahhahahahahahahaha
hahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahhaahahhahaahaha!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHA
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAAAHHHAHA
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAH
HHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Any questions?"
The Hypno-Toad said:
Hmmmmm.. I have a feeling that
Any questions?"
conversation might go something like this, I have a feeling that Any questions?"
"Right Ferdie, here are the conditions for you coming back. They are non negotiable:
1.) You are number two to Lewis at all times
2.) You will not talk to the Spanish media
3.) You will not talk to Flav
4.) In fact screw 2 & 3, you will not talk to ANYONE! Or have a mobile.....or e mail..... or a voice recorder.....or two tin cans and some string......nothing.
5.) Ref 1.) your overalls will not have any sponsorship badges at all, they will just have the phrase, "I'm a giant number two!" written on them in the style of those 80s Frankie T-shirts....and so will your nomex underwear......& the cap you have to wear on the podium....
6.) If Lewis wants to speak to you, you will start each reply with the words "Yes Master Lewis,"
7.) Every morning you have to lick workshop floor clean wit'tongue and pay me threpence a week for privilege.
8.) You will share your hotel room at every away race with Ralf Schumacher.....in bunk beds....in cotton pjs.....with little drawings of go karts all over them......
9.) If you do anything that means that Ferrari win a race or even score an extra point I reserve the right to make you perform oral sex on Jane Goody.....with everyone watching.....including your mum....
10.) Every time we have a meeting you will knell and kiss my ring....and you will kiss my ring....oh yes you will kiss my ring!.......YOU WILL KISS MY RING AND BE GRATEFUL!!.....YOU'LL NEED KNEEPADS SEWN INTO YOUR RACESUIT COS YOU'LL BE KISSING MY RING SO OFTEN!!!......Kiss my ring, Ferdie!!!!......KISS MY RING MY LITTLE SPANISH FOOL!!!!!.......KISS MY RING!!!!!!
hahahahaahahahahahahhaahahahahahahahhahahaahahahahahahahahahahah
hahahahhahhahahhaahhahahahahahahhaahhahahahaahahahahhahahaahaahha
haahhahahahahahhahahahahahahahahhahahhahahhahahhahahahahahahaha
hahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahhaahahhahaahaha!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHA
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAAAHHHAHA
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAH
HHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
spills coffee after number 2, by number 10 incapable of any work whatsoever 
Edited by rubystone on Wednesday 5th December 14:43
Seems like an clever move - I have the idea of a phone call in my head..
"oh, hi Fernando. Spain's nice at this time of year, isn't it? Finished your Christmas shopping? So anyway, who are you driving for next year then...?"
" ... Oh. I see. That's rather unfortunate isn't it, but, that is what happens when put yourself in the hands of the Italians.."
"what, no one? At all? Even Force India won't give you a one year gig?"
"Well, you know I'd hate you to be sitting out on the sidelines at such an important stage in your career, I'm sure we could come to an arrangement ..."
" 'course ... I'm not sure we could afford to pay you nearly as much as last year, what with all the 'troubles' and that ... plus we'd actually bargained on selling you off to pay some of that irksome fine"...
"I guess ... shall we say one third of last years? No bonuses I'm afraid, new company policy, sorry senor"
... "that's great. I'll send over the paperwork".
"oh, hi Fernando. Spain's nice at this time of year, isn't it? Finished your Christmas shopping? So anyway, who are you driving for next year then...?"
" ... Oh. I see. That's rather unfortunate isn't it, but, that is what happens when put yourself in the hands of the Italians.."
"what, no one? At all? Even Force India won't give you a one year gig?"
"Well, you know I'd hate you to be sitting out on the sidelines at such an important stage in your career, I'm sure we could come to an arrangement ..."
" 'course ... I'm not sure we could afford to pay you nearly as much as last year, what with all the 'troubles' and that ... plus we'd actually bargained on selling you off to pay some of that irksome fine"...
"I guess ... shall we say one third of last years? No bonuses I'm afraid, new company policy, sorry senor"
... "that's great. I'll send over the paperwork".
haha top comebacks!
A story only ridiculous enough to be spouted by the Spanish media, huh? Are they now understanding that FA was completely in the wrong and that he really has fcuked up his entire career, so it seems so far. Honda have rejected him, Redbull are already set, Renault can't afford him and Toyota are too crap.
Ron Dennis must be laughing his rse off...
A story only ridiculous enough to be spouted by the Spanish media, huh? Are they now understanding that FA was completely in the wrong and that he really has fcuked up his entire career, so it seems so far. Honda have rejected him, Redbull are already set, Renault can't afford him and Toyota are too crap.
Ron Dennis must be laughing his rse off...
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