embarassing traveling moments
Discussion
Whats your most embarassing traveling moment??
mine was on the train from birmingham new street to ruabon, i was doing the nodding off, head slowly dropping, then waking with a jolt thing, and i elbowed the woman next to me in the arm.
she didnt say anything, but im felt bad at the fact i;d just full pelt elbowed a random woman..
oops
Thom
mine was on the train from birmingham new street to ruabon, i was doing the nodding off, head slowly dropping, then waking with a jolt thing, and i elbowed the woman next to me in the arm.
she didnt say anything, but im felt bad at the fact i;d just full pelt elbowed a random woman..
oops
Thom
Was a young Royal Navy matelot in 1976 traveling from Portsmouth to home on leave, got on the train after a couple of pints, promptly dropped off to sleep, next thing i knew someone was farting very loud very close to me and as i rose from my slumber realised it was I 
I didnt open my eyes but thought about the consequences, realising it was probably best that i kept my eyes closed and pretended to be asleep.
The carriage had gone fairly quiet too apart from a couple of little kids giggling and laughing. I didnt even know how far i was into the journey or how long i had to stay with my eyes shut, anyway after about 15 minutes the train got into Waterloo. My plan was to pretend to be asleep until the carriage had emptied then i could get on my way, suffice to say, the train stopped, everyone was getting off and a little old lady tapped me on the shoulder and said in a strong cockney accent "its ok sonny you can get orf now, theyve all gone". It seems she knew exactly what i had done and what i was doing.
Embarrassing as f
k at the time but a great pub story now
I didnt open my eyes but thought about the consequences, realising it was probably best that i kept my eyes closed and pretended to be asleep.The carriage had gone fairly quiet too apart from a couple of little kids giggling and laughing. I didnt even know how far i was into the journey or how long i had to stay with my eyes shut, anyway after about 15 minutes the train got into Waterloo. My plan was to pretend to be asleep until the carriage had emptied then i could get on my way, suffice to say, the train stopped, everyone was getting off and a little old lady tapped me on the shoulder and said in a strong cockney accent "its ok sonny you can get orf now, theyve all gone". It seems she knew exactly what i had done and what i was doing.
Embarrassing as f
k at the time but a great pub story noweuroboy said:
2006 - Going for a job interview in Maastricht, NL.
Was told by the company to take a flight to Schippol and then to check in to the Mercure Hotel. Duly checked the interweb and found that there was a Mercure at Schippol airport and all was hunkydory.
Come the night of the flight, arrive at Schippol around 2130, make my way to the hotel (which is actually 5km from the airport) and present myself at the checkin desk. The receptionist cant find the booking and I get a little upset and frustrated and neither of us can work out what the hell has gone wrong.
Then the lady looks in the national booking system and finds a room in my name in Maastricht (at which point I had never heard of) - I gingerly ask how close is Maastricht, hoping for 40km away etc - nope its almost 300km away and on further investigation we find the last train leaves in 15 mins!
B@llocks! However the lovely receptionist took pity on me, shoved me in to her Audi TT and rushed me back to the Airport train station - made the train with about 30secs to spare, arrived in Maastricht at 0130 and into the hotel at 0200. Was up again at 0600 to attend the interview.
Cant believe I was so stupid, but I got the job and am still here 3 yrs later
(The receptionist was bloody lovely looking too)!
Why havent you been back there?Was told by the company to take a flight to Schippol and then to check in to the Mercure Hotel. Duly checked the interweb and found that there was a Mercure at Schippol airport and all was hunkydory.
Come the night of the flight, arrive at Schippol around 2130, make my way to the hotel (which is actually 5km from the airport) and present myself at the checkin desk. The receptionist cant find the booking and I get a little upset and frustrated and neither of us can work out what the hell has gone wrong.
Then the lady looks in the national booking system and finds a room in my name in Maastricht (at which point I had never heard of) - I gingerly ask how close is Maastricht, hoping for 40km away etc - nope its almost 300km away and on further investigation we find the last train leaves in 15 mins!
B@llocks! However the lovely receptionist took pity on me, shoved me in to her Audi TT and rushed me back to the Airport train station - made the train with about 30secs to spare, arrived in Maastricht at 0130 and into the hotel at 0200. Was up again at 0600 to attend the interview.
Cant believe I was so stupid, but I got the job and am still here 3 yrs later
(The receptionist was bloody lovely looking too)!
I had a long day at our head office in London last year at a training course. Got back to Euston and missed the train by a couple of minutes, with the next one an hour or so away, I went to the bar for a pint.
I normally fall asleep on trains so I set my alarm for about 10 minutes before we get to my station. Sat down, the carriage was empty apart from a woman with a toddler, so iPod in and promptly drop off. Waking from my slumber when the alarm goes off, I hear the toddler exclain "Look mummy the man who was dribbling has woken up"! I actually had a wet patch right down my shirt, and didn't have a jacket with me either, so the walk through the station to the mrs's car was quite embarassing...
Her suggestion of going out for a meal was also turned down...
I normally fall asleep on trains so I set my alarm for about 10 minutes before we get to my station. Sat down, the carriage was empty apart from a woman with a toddler, so iPod in and promptly drop off. Waking from my slumber when the alarm goes off, I hear the toddler exclain "Look mummy the man who was dribbling has woken up"! I actually had a wet patch right down my shirt, and didn't have a jacket with me either, so the walk through the station to the mrs's car was quite embarassing...
Her suggestion of going out for a meal was also turned down...
On a train form Manchester to London. Very high winds were shaking the train all over the place and I dropped a can of lager I'd just bought from the buffet carriage. I saw peole looking at me staggering around with a can of lager in my hand and I realised they thought I was a pissed alchy. I then explained to those near me that it was the wind blowing the train around that was making me lose my balance. They ignored me and just looked out the window, which was very embarassing. There were no seats left so I propped myself up near the toilet. I opened my lager and because I had dropped it it went off like a foam fire extinguisher, all over the back and head of the person sat in front of me, who seemed to freeze in terror. At this precise moment there was a huge gust of wind that shook the train so hard it caused the toilet door to swing open. The woman sat on the toilet screamed very loudly as I was stood there staring in through the wide open door. I got filthy looks off the other passengers for the rest of the journey. Except for one fella who on leaving the train said he had watched the whole sequence of events unfold and had been laughing so much he had to use his asthma pump.
Not my story but too good not to post.
Last summer my brother in law and his mat Pat went to Cancun on an all inclusive holiday. On arrival they booked and paid for an coach excursion to some jungle temple.
Then Pat got a serious dose of the runs and was in bed for 3 days, but insisted he was well enough to go on the trip rather than lose his money, so overdosed on Immodium and got on the bus. The cheery Mexiacan guide pointed out where the toilet was on the coach but jokingly said that this was only for 'wee-wee'.
Part way into the journey Pat's guts started to rumble and he was forced to go to the toilet. Having thrashed the coach toilet pan to within an inch of its life, an acrid smell begins to permeate the coach. Pat is still seated in case there is more to come. The Cheery Mexican guide gets on the micraphone asking who has broken the 'wee-wee' only rule and a large American lady who had been in there just before Pat gets the blame from people on the coach, but aggressively protests her innocence. Cheery Mexican lady hammers on the toilet door but by this time the smell is so strong that people are gagging and one lady is physically sick. The coach has to pull over on the hard should and everyone gets off, some to be sick in the bushes. Pat stays put with the Cheey Mexican stil hamering on the door.
Eventually he has to come out and do the 'walk of shame' along the line of Americans apologising to each one.
Makes me laugh just typing it now, when I first heard it a little bit of wee-wee came out.
Last summer my brother in law and his mat Pat went to Cancun on an all inclusive holiday. On arrival they booked and paid for an coach excursion to some jungle temple.
Then Pat got a serious dose of the runs and was in bed for 3 days, but insisted he was well enough to go on the trip rather than lose his money, so overdosed on Immodium and got on the bus. The cheery Mexiacan guide pointed out where the toilet was on the coach but jokingly said that this was only for 'wee-wee'.
Part way into the journey Pat's guts started to rumble and he was forced to go to the toilet. Having thrashed the coach toilet pan to within an inch of its life, an acrid smell begins to permeate the coach. Pat is still seated in case there is more to come. The Cheery Mexican guide gets on the micraphone asking who has broken the 'wee-wee' only rule and a large American lady who had been in there just before Pat gets the blame from people on the coach, but aggressively protests her innocence. Cheery Mexican lady hammers on the toilet door but by this time the smell is so strong that people are gagging and one lady is physically sick. The coach has to pull over on the hard should and everyone gets off, some to be sick in the bushes. Pat stays put with the Cheey Mexican stil hamering on the door.
Eventually he has to come out and do the 'walk of shame' along the line of Americans apologising to each one.
Makes me laugh just typing it now, when I first heard it a little bit of wee-wee came out.
After a few years commuting I finally learnt how to fall asleep on the Trains. Unfortunately, I started sleeping somewhat heavily... One day I was jarred from my sleep for some reason, to see my station slowly moving along outside the window.. I leapt to my feet, opened the door (old trains with door handles which you open yourself), and basically went a**e over t*t out of the door and onto the platform, landing heavily on my hands and knees. I walked with a limp for a few days.
However, best one (IMHO) is a friend of mine. He commuted to work for about 4 years from the same house, getting the same train at the same time, and of course most people get the same carriage each day as well. As we know, when you do that, you get the 'commuter nod' which is when you acknowledge the existance of the same bloke you have seen sat 3 feet from you for the last 3-4 years as you travel in to work. One day, our man is standing on the platform waiting for his train, when he notices a few people who usually get his train on the other platform. One of them gives him the commuter nod. Undeterred by the fact that all the people who normally take his train are for some reason looking to use a different platform, when his train arrives, he gets on and falls asleep. About an hour later he awakes to discover that the had got on the wrong train and had travelled out of London instead of in to London. HE then has to get off the train and get the train into London. Now, if I'd done that, and arrived at work at noon instead of 8am, I'd have made something up about oversleeping, but oh no, our man tells us the truth. He also made clear that the trains hadn't been disrupted so it wasn't like everyone was trying to work out which train was on which platform so it was an easy mistake to make, nope, he was just a muppet. He has no idea why he wondered onto the wrong platform, a platform which had not in the last four years taken him to work.......
However, best one (IMHO) is a friend of mine. He commuted to work for about 4 years from the same house, getting the same train at the same time, and of course most people get the same carriage each day as well. As we know, when you do that, you get the 'commuter nod' which is when you acknowledge the existance of the same bloke you have seen sat 3 feet from you for the last 3-4 years as you travel in to work. One day, our man is standing on the platform waiting for his train, when he notices a few people who usually get his train on the other platform. One of them gives him the commuter nod. Undeterred by the fact that all the people who normally take his train are for some reason looking to use a different platform, when his train arrives, he gets on and falls asleep. About an hour later he awakes to discover that the had got on the wrong train and had travelled out of London instead of in to London. HE then has to get off the train and get the train into London. Now, if I'd done that, and arrived at work at noon instead of 8am, I'd have made something up about oversleeping, but oh no, our man tells us the truth. He also made clear that the trains hadn't been disrupted so it wasn't like everyone was trying to work out which train was on which platform so it was an easy mistake to make, nope, he was just a muppet. He has no idea why he wondered onto the wrong platform, a platform which had not in the last four years taken him to work.......
phumy said:
Was a young Royal Navy matelot in 1976 traveling from Portsmouth to home on leave, got on the train after a couple of pints, promptly dropped off to sleep, next thing i knew someone was farting very loud very close to me and as i rose from my slumber realised it was I I didnt open my eyes but thought about the consequences, realising it was probably best that i kept my eyes closed and pretended to be asleep.
The carriage had gone fairly quiet too apart from a couple of little kids giggling and laughing. I didnt even know how far i was into the journey or how long i had to stay with my eyes shut, anyway after about 15 minutes the train got into Waterloo. My plan was to pretend to be asleep until the carriage had emptied then i could get on my way, suffice to say, the train stopped, everyone was getting off and a little old lady tapped me on the shoulder and said in a strong cockney accent "its ok sonny you can get orf now, theyve all gone". It seems she knew exactly what i had done and what i was doing.
Embarrassing as fk at the time but a great pub story now
....lol.....nice story..... I didnt open my eyes but thought about the consequences, realising it was probably best that i kept my eyes closed and pretended to be asleep.The carriage had gone fairly quiet too apart from a couple of little kids giggling and laughing. I didnt even know how far i was into the journey or how long i had to stay with my eyes shut, anyway after about 15 minutes the train got into Waterloo. My plan was to pretend to be asleep until the carriage had emptied then i could get on my way, suffice to say, the train stopped, everyone was getting off and a little old lady tapped me on the shoulder and said in a strong cockney accent "its ok sonny you can get orf now, theyve all gone". It seems she knew exactly what i had done and what i was doing.
Embarrassing as f
k at the time but a great pub story noweuroboy said:
phumy said:
euroboy said:
phumy said:
Why havent you been back there?
Good question! Although cant complain now as I have a lovely Dutch girlfriend (and yes they DO exist!)
Brown and Boris said:
Not my story but too good not to post.
Last summer my brother in law and his mat Pat went to Cancun on an all inclusive holiday. On arrival they booked and paid for an coach excursion to some jungle temple.
Then Pat got a serious dose of the runs and was in bed for 3 days, but insisted he was well enough to go on the trip rather than lose his money, so overdosed on Immodium and got on the bus. The cheery Mexiacan guide pointed out where the toilet was on the coach but jokingly said that this was only for 'wee-wee'.
Part way into the journey Pat's guts started to rumble and he was forced to go to the toilet. Having thrashed the coach toilet pan to within an inch of its life, an acrid smell begins to permeate the coach. Pat is still seated in case there is more to come. The Cheery Mexican guide gets on the micraphone asking who has broken the 'wee-wee' only rule and a large American lady who had been in there just before Pat gets the blame from people on the coach, but aggressively protests her innocence. Cheery Mexican lady hammers on the toilet door but by this time the smell is so strong that people are gagging and one lady is physically sick. The coach has to pull over on the hard should and everyone gets off, some to be sick in the bushes. Pat stays put with the Cheey Mexican stil hamering on the door.
Eventually he has to come out and do the 'walk of shame' along the line of Americans apologising to each one.
Makes me laugh just typing it now, when I first heard it a little bit of wee-wee came out.
Last summer my brother in law and his mat Pat went to Cancun on an all inclusive holiday. On arrival they booked and paid for an coach excursion to some jungle temple.
Then Pat got a serious dose of the runs and was in bed for 3 days, but insisted he was well enough to go on the trip rather than lose his money, so overdosed on Immodium and got on the bus. The cheery Mexiacan guide pointed out where the toilet was on the coach but jokingly said that this was only for 'wee-wee'.
Part way into the journey Pat's guts started to rumble and he was forced to go to the toilet. Having thrashed the coach toilet pan to within an inch of its life, an acrid smell begins to permeate the coach. Pat is still seated in case there is more to come. The Cheery Mexican guide gets on the micraphone asking who has broken the 'wee-wee' only rule and a large American lady who had been in there just before Pat gets the blame from people on the coach, but aggressively protests her innocence. Cheery Mexican lady hammers on the toilet door but by this time the smell is so strong that people are gagging and one lady is physically sick. The coach has to pull over on the hard should and everyone gets off, some to be sick in the bushes. Pat stays put with the Cheey Mexican stil hamering on the door.
Eventually he has to come out and do the 'walk of shame' along the line of Americans apologising to each one.
Makes me laugh just typing it now, when I first heard it a little bit of wee-wee came out.
AlpineWhite said:
euroboy said:
phumy said:
euroboy said:
phumy said:
Why havent you been back there?
Good question! Although cant complain now as I have a lovely Dutch girlfriend (and yes they DO exist!)I was waiting for the train into Manchester, where I am its the last stop and the trains are every half hour so in rush hour they are hammered and everyone getting on at my stop has to cram on and stand where ever they can.
Whilst waiting for the train im stood feeling sorry for myself because im feeling really ill, im sweatiing, belly is rumbling and I just feel rotten. This tramp walks onto the platform and sees the sign above my head saying id love to chat to him. He comes over and tells me he's left poor and homeless because Richard Branson robbed him of his 50% share in Virgin, I just stood nodding in agreement and feeling sorry for myself. He then asked for spare change which I didnt have, he gave me some st for being cheap, I told him to bog off, dont remember my exact words but he certainly did.
Anyway the train finally comes and we all pile on it, its only two carrages long tramp gets on one and I another - A lucky escape. One guy who I dont know but saw on the train says to me, I glad he got you and not me, he looked right at me - cheers fella. My belly is rumbling and I cant hold on anymore, i push my way through the crowds and go to the toilet. It came out like a tap and went on for ever, i really had a bad belly and my crap was like evian. As i came out I could see the shock on peoples faces as they gagged for clean air, I was so embarassed and felt real bad for everyone and then from behind I heard the tramp say "And you had the cheek to call me smelly" Thats when I nearly died. Im normally a confident person and this sort of thing would never bother me but that was 8 years or so ago but ive not been on a train since, everytime I think about using one its all I can think about.
Whilst waiting for the train im stood feeling sorry for myself because im feeling really ill, im sweatiing, belly is rumbling and I just feel rotten. This tramp walks onto the platform and sees the sign above my head saying id love to chat to him. He comes over and tells me he's left poor and homeless because Richard Branson robbed him of his 50% share in Virgin, I just stood nodding in agreement and feeling sorry for myself. He then asked for spare change which I didnt have, he gave me some s
t for being cheap, I told him to bog off, dont remember my exact words but he certainly did.Anyway the train finally comes and we all pile on it, its only two carrages long tramp gets on one and I another - A lucky escape. One guy who I dont know but saw on the train says to me, I glad he got you and not me, he looked right at me - cheers fella. My belly is rumbling and I cant hold on anymore, i push my way through the crowds and go to the toilet. It came out like a tap and went on for ever, i really had a bad belly and my crap was like evian. As i came out I could see the shock on peoples faces as they gagged for clean air, I was so embarassed and felt real bad for everyone and then from behind I heard the tramp say "And you had the cheek to call me smelly" Thats when I nearly died. Im normally a confident person and this sort of thing would never bother me but that was 8 years or so ago but ive not been on a train since, everytime I think about using one its all I can think about.
nothing quite as good as those but one night after a few beers in Swansea I got he Paddington train home to Bridgend (about 3 stops).
I promptly fell asleep only to be woken up by the ticket inspector who looked at my ticket and said "my my we are tired aren't we sir, we are just approaching Reading...."
It was the last train and had to wait about 5 hours for the return on Reading station.
I promptly fell asleep only to be woken up by the ticket inspector who looked at my ticket and said "my my we are tired aren't we sir, we are just approaching Reading...."
It was the last train and had to wait about 5 hours for the return on Reading station.
gopher said:
nothing quite as good as those but one night after a few beers in Swansea I got he Paddington train home to Bridgend (about 3 stops).
I promptly fell asleep only to be woken up by the ticket inspector who looked at my ticket and said "my my we are tired aren't we sir, we are just approaching Reading...."
It was the last train and had to wait about 5 hours for the return on Reading station.
A colleague of mine, after an "enthusiastic" night out, got the last train home to Southend Victoria. Except he didn't wake up, well, he did, but when the train had returned in the morning to Fenchurch Street. He came into work, and just went out and bought new undies and shirt and tie.....I promptly fell asleep only to be woken up by the ticket inspector who looked at my ticket and said "my my we are tired aren't we sir, we are just approaching Reading...."
It was the last train and had to wait about 5 hours for the return on Reading station.
Brown and Boris said:
Not my story but too good not to post.
Last summer my brother in law and his mat Pat went to Cancun on an all inclusive holiday. On arrival they booked and paid for an coach excursion to some jungle temple.
Then Pat got a serious dose of the runs and was in bed for 3 days, but insisted he was well enough to go on the trip rather than lose his money, so overdosed on Immodium and got on the bus. The cheery Mexiacan guide pointed out where the toilet was on the coach but jokingly said that this was only for 'wee-wee'.
Part way into the journey Pat's guts started to rumble and he was forced to go to the toilet. Having thrashed the coach toilet pan to within an inch of its life, an acrid smell begins to permeate the coach. Pat is still seated in case there is more to come. The Cheery Mexican guide gets on the micraphone asking who has broken the 'wee-wee' only rule and a large American lady who had been in there just before Pat gets the blame from people on the coach, but aggressively protests her innocence. Cheery Mexican lady hammers on the toilet door but by this time the smell is so strong that people are gagging and one lady is physically sick. The coach has to pull over on the hard should and everyone gets off, some to be sick in the bushes. Pat stays put with the Cheey Mexican stil hamering on the door.
Eventually he has to come out and do the 'walk of shame' along the line of Americans apologising to each one.
Makes me laugh just typing it now, when I first heard it a little bit of wee-wee came out.
Holy sLast summer my brother in law and his mat Pat went to Cancun on an all inclusive holiday. On arrival they booked and paid for an coach excursion to some jungle temple.
Then Pat got a serious dose of the runs and was in bed for 3 days, but insisted he was well enough to go on the trip rather than lose his money, so overdosed on Immodium and got on the bus. The cheery Mexiacan guide pointed out where the toilet was on the coach but jokingly said that this was only for 'wee-wee'.
Part way into the journey Pat's guts started to rumble and he was forced to go to the toilet. Having thrashed the coach toilet pan to within an inch of its life, an acrid smell begins to permeate the coach. Pat is still seated in case there is more to come. The Cheery Mexican guide gets on the micraphone asking who has broken the 'wee-wee' only rule and a large American lady who had been in there just before Pat gets the blame from people on the coach, but aggressively protests her innocence. Cheery Mexican lady hammers on the toilet door but by this time the smell is so strong that people are gagging and one lady is physically sick. The coach has to pull over on the hard should and everyone gets off, some to be sick in the bushes. Pat stays put with the Cheey Mexican stil hamering on the door.
Eventually he has to come out and do the 'walk of shame' along the line of Americans apologising to each one.
Makes me laugh just typing it now, when I first heard it a little bit of wee-wee came out.
t that is the funniest tale!!! hahahaha "Who broke the Wee-Wee only rule?" hahahahahahahahaWaiting for a flight home from the US in Atlanta airport international terminal, I could either go to the smoking zone to fill up on nicotine, or sit in the bar (this was several years ago when smoking was less evil than it seems to be now). So obviously I chose the bar and got chatting to a Dutch chap and we sank a few and smoked a few. I headed off to get on the flight, took my seat and off we went. A few minutes after take-off I started to regret the fluid intake, but no problem, in a few minutes the seatbelt light would go out and I would high tail it to the can.
Except for the turbulence. About 55 minutes of turbulence as it turned out. After 30 minutes, I was in serious danger of pissing myself, so I sheepishly asked the flight attendant if I could slip into the khazi. No, was the reply, sorry but you can't. After another 10 minutes, I called the guy back over and said "look, I'm really sorry, but I am going to have to go to the can". No, you can't do that sir, was the response. "What do you expect me to do?" I feebly countered; "You'll have to hold it" he replied, clearly pissed off with me by now. "Sorry, but that really isn't going to happen."
So grudgingly he agred that, at my own risk, I could leg it to the head and relieve myself. A while later, I walked red-faced down the aisle back to my seat, whilst the flight attendant made a polite announcement that the seat belt signs were for our own safety and that we should remain seated at all times. He then offered me a drink. I declined.
Except for the turbulence. About 55 minutes of turbulence as it turned out. After 30 minutes, I was in serious danger of pissing myself, so I sheepishly asked the flight attendant if I could slip into the khazi. No, was the reply, sorry but you can't. After another 10 minutes, I called the guy back over and said "look, I'm really sorry, but I am going to have to go to the can". No, you can't do that sir, was the response. "What do you expect me to do?" I feebly countered; "You'll have to hold it" he replied, clearly pissed off with me by now. "Sorry, but that really isn't going to happen."
So grudgingly he agred that, at my own risk, I could leg it to the head and relieve myself. A while later, I walked red-faced down the aisle back to my seat, whilst the flight attendant made a polite announcement that the seat belt signs were for our own safety and that we should remain seated at all times. He then offered me a drink. I declined.
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