Tonker & Soovy LLP - now hiring
Discussion
Tonker & Soovy LLP is a boutique law firm specialising in the legal aspects of relationships.
Our unique offering, which blends City law firm experience with years spent listening to poor sods who’ve been stitched up by snakes with t1t5 sets us apart from other firms. With this experience we are exceptionally well placed to meet the increasingly complex legal requirements of Pistonheaders who are crying out for practical, informed advice about how not to get reamed by their birds at competitive fee rates.
Our team is knowledgeable, direct, and to the point, but never loses that hint of compassion. Well, actually not the last bit. At all.
These attributes have led to Tonker & Soovy LLP advising and continuing to advise some of the biggest “names” on Pistonheads on all aspects of getting together, breaking up, and all the bits in between including pregnancy, contraception, Child Support Agency issues and internet dating.
We are determined to provide our clients with an exceptional personal service that continually exceeds their expectations, ensuring real solutions and, above all, the edge over that nightmare they ended up shacked up with.
We look forward to hearing from you.
We are currently hiring, and accept CV’s from girls in Pinks shirts two sizes too small, who’ll do anything for a glass of cheap champagne.
Edited by Soovy on Thursday 9th September 14:26
hes as level do you?
I can personally vouch for this service and I don't mind you using my quote for any of your forthcoming advertising campaigns:
"When Tonker predicted that the young police woman I was about to date would be: emotionally & financially bankrupt, have a potty mouth and be as ‘dirty as a badgers ball bag’, he hit the nail squarely on the head.
It prepared me for the following 2 months of persistent drunk texts, random mid night phone calls and constantly checking my rear view mirror for a flashing blue light!"
"When Tonker predicted that the young police woman I was about to date would be: emotionally & financially bankrupt, have a potty mouth and be as ‘dirty as a badgers ball bag’, he hit the nail squarely on the head.
It prepared me for the following 2 months of persistent drunk texts, random mid night phone calls and constantly checking my rear view mirror for a flashing blue light!"
If you want I could deal with your clients that are not recieving enough benefits, or live in state funded property that isn't upto the required standard, and with only five bedrooms maybe too small for a family of twelve.
We as a team may even be able to get the state to throw in a car for them or even get thier breakfast delivered.
Go on hire me we'll make a killing, you know it makes sense.
We as a team may even be able to get the state to throw in a car for them or even get thier breakfast delivered.
Go on hire me we'll make a killing, you know it makes sense.
Day dreaming here..............
I'm trying very hard to get what I have got to get done this afternoon, but I am totally failing because I'm thinking about a young secretary type in a tight black pencil skirt, gently resting against, with her legs slightly apart the large oak desk. Her pale pink slightly striped Pinks shirts unbuttoned to the mid cleavage and 2 sizes too small. Her blond hair in a loose bun tied up with a Mont Blanc pencil, and her over sized black rimmed glasses sat perched on the end of her nose.
I am, err, well, err, going to have to sort my self out now.
As you were...
I'm trying very hard to get what I have got to get done this afternoon, but I am totally failing because I'm thinking about a young secretary type in a tight black pencil skirt, gently resting against, with her legs slightly apart the large oak desk. Her pale pink slightly striped Pinks shirts unbuttoned to the mid cleavage and 2 sizes too small. Her blond hair in a loose bun tied up with a Mont Blanc pencil, and her over sized black rimmed glasses sat perched on the end of her nose.
I am, err, well, err, going to have to sort my self out now.
As you were...
Steamer said:
I can personally vouch for this service and I don't mind you using my quote for any of your forthcoming advertising campaigns:
"When Tonker predicted that the young police woman I was about to date would be: emotionally & financially bankrupt, have a potty mouth and be as ‘dirty as a badgers ball bag’, he hit the nail squarely on the head.
It prepared me for the following 2 months of persistent drunk texts, random mid night phone calls and constantly checking my rear view mirror for a flashing blue light!"
That's going on the "testimonials" part of the website."When Tonker predicted that the young police woman I was about to date would be: emotionally & financially bankrupt, have a potty mouth and be as ‘dirty as a badgers ball bag’, he hit the nail squarely on the head.
It prepared me for the following 2 months of persistent drunk texts, random mid night phone calls and constantly checking my rear view mirror for a flashing blue light!"
CedGTV said:
I'm trying very hard to get what I have got to get done this afternoon, but I am totally failing because I'm thinking about a young secretary type in a tight black pencil skirt, gently resting against, with her legs slightly apart the large oak desk. Her pale pink slightly striped Pinks shirts unbuttoned to the mid cleavage and 2 sizes too small. Her blond hair in a loose bun tied up with a Mont Blanc pencil, and her over sized black rimmed glasses sat perched on the end of her nose.
Only a PHer could bring correct pencil etiquette into a secretary fantasy 
TonyHetherington said:
CedGTV said:
I'm trying very hard to get what I have got to get done this afternoon, but I am totally failing because I'm thinking about a young secretary type in a tight black pencil skirt, gently resting against, with her legs slightly apart the large oak desk. Her pale pink slightly striped Pinks shirts unbuttoned to the mid cleavage and 2 sizes too small. Her blond hair in a loose bun tied up with a Mont Blanc pencil, and her over sized black rimmed glasses sat perched on the end of her nose.
Only a PHer could bring correct pencil etiquette into a secretary fantasy Tonker, Soovy and Bateman LLP.
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