Baby Costs - !!!!!

[Lotus82]

Despite having a good household income I am feeling the pain since the twins arrived and when they go into full time childcare things will get a whole load more demanding.

Can anyone provide advice as to cost saving solutions when it comes to childcare?

I earn £65k and wife earns £45k pa.

My wage covers all of our costs (mortgage, utilities, food etc). Wife wage will go on childcare, more or less all of it!!

Nether employer off childcare vouches and as I earn in excess of £60k (just) I do not believe we quality for any state support. So we are just the wrong side of state support but certainly do not feel well off.

Without going into detail grandparents are not able to help and no family members. On our tod.

Do I just have to suck it up and accept things will be tight for the next few years or is there any tips or advice you can give me?

Thanks all

[Lotus82]

rich12 said:

You have a joint income of £110k and you are worrying how to survive with twins???
Spend less??

Spend less - we budget every penny. Sold the fun cars, stopped holidays, cancelled sky etc. The information I did not provide was that we overpay the mortgage (£300) so well aware that will most probably have to give partially or entirely.

rich12 said:

If your wife's income will primarily go on childcare, i'm assuming she really wants to work and not look after her kids? What I mean by that is she is basically working full time just to pay for some random person to look after her kids.

I am happy for that but she strongly believes the twins should experience other people, integration, social skills etc. One which needs to be discussed in more detail I feel.

Thanks for your comments.

[Lotus82]

DoubleSix said:

rich12 said:

You have a joint income of £110k and you are worrying how to survive with twins???
Spend less??

ttish answer there rich12, well done.

OP I feel your pain. Despite having higher income and less kids childcare is ruinous, and I have found it difficult.

Shame your employer doesnt do tax vouchers. I only qualify for the minimum but it helps me feel less sore.

Some people are lucky enough to have family that can do one day a week, is that an option?

Ultimately we have just had to change our lifestyle a lot. The flash cars have gone, paid down debt, and hammered down the outgoings on food especially. It's not fun when you are used to lifes fineries but I derive my pleasure from other things these days and perspective has shifted as a result.

It does get gradually easier but there's no doubting the 'squeezed middle' is a tough place right now.

Kids are worth it though eh?

I'm glad there are other people in a similar position.

I feel like I am being targeted. If we both earned £49,999 a year we would get £'000's in handouts, however we don't and for a period during maternity we will go 3 months on my wage alone - that will be no fun at all.

Edited by Lotus82 on Sunday 29th March 13:30

[Lotus82]

DuraAce said:

Mental.

Just spend less. how on earth do you think people on less than 110k manage?

I don't know what cars you drive or where you holiday etc but downgrade your lifestyle slightly and you'll be just fine.

I have no idea how people on less than £110k a year manage. There is Government support for people who earn less and unless I know how much they get it is hard to make a comparison. Just receiving weekly child benefit would be nice but we don't qualify for that.

No holidays.
I drive a Fiat Panda.
My phone is paid by work
Sky has gone
Shop at Aldi

[Lotus82]

Defcon5 said:

Lotus82 said:

I'm glad there are other people in a similar position.

I feel like I am being targeted. If we both earned £49,999 a year we would get £'000's in handouts,

Really?

My partner an I earn £35000 between us, and receive £80 a month in child benefit. That's all. Could you enlighten me on what other handouts I should be getting, as a few extra thousands would come in quite useful

If we both earned £49,999 each we would qualify for child benefit which our local tax office told me would be £33 (1st twin) + £14 (2nd twin) weekly, or £2,440 a year.

[Lotus82]

DoubleSix said:

Defcon5 said:

Lotus82 said:

I'm glad there are other people in a similar position.

I feel like I am being targeted. If we both earned £49,999 a year we would get £'000's in handouts,

Really?

My partner an I earn £35000 between us, and receive £80 a month in child benefit. That's all. Could you enlighten me on what other handouts I should be getting, as a few extra thousands would come in quite useful

Dont bother answering this stuff.

I earn 150k+ and still dont have money to throw around. Some people will never appreciate the fixed costs element.

Quickly realising there is an us Vs them mentality forming in this post. That was not my intention at all an do wish ill on anyone, was just looking for advice.

[Lotus82]

DoubleSix said:

Lotus82 said:

DoubleSix said:

rich12 said:

You have a joint income of £110k and you are worrying how to survive with twins???
Spend less??

ttish answer there rich12, well done.

OP I feel your pain. Despite having higher income and less kids childcare is ruinous, and I have found it difficult.

Shame your employer doesnt do tax vouchers. I only qualify for the minimum but it helps me feel less sore.

Some people are lucky enough to have family that can do one day a week, is that an option?

Ultimately we have just had to change our lifestyle a lot. The flash cars have gone, paid down debt, and hammered down the outgoings on food especially. It's not fun when you are used to lifes fineries but I derive my pleasure from other things these days and perspective has shifted as a result.

It does get gradually easier but there's no doubting the 'squeezed middle' is a tough place right now.

Kids are worth it though eh?

I'm glad there are other people in a similar position.

I feel like I am being targeted. If we both earned £49,999 a year we would get £'000's in handouts, however we don't and for a period during maternity we will go 3 months on my wage alone - that will be no fun at all.

Well the Lotus went before the twins arrived and I run a Fiat Panda! Sky went and costs are analysed to make sure we're not being daft.

Whoever spends £1,500 on food a month ..... hahahaha legend. What are you eating? Steaks for breakfast and dinner?

It ain't all subshine and lollipops for sure.

Is your Mrs on board? Mine is a trooper and worked out early on that working full time was pointless. She works 3 days a week now as that was optimum and still gets the kid mixing with others.

In addition, she gets nappies and the baby crap from low cost outlets. She cooks from scratch for the kids and ourselves. And she certainly didnt have three months off!

I have an image of you doing the blue arse routine whilst Mrs Lotus82 does what she always did. Only because I have seen so many examples of this elsewhere amongst our friends and family etc

Mrs is great. Taken to being a Mum like a duck to water. Frankly it is a team effort so far ..... all hands to the deck with twins, no choice.

I guess we will just need to apply further measures to the budget and lifestyle.

[Lotus82]

rich12 said:

OP, as you say you will have to just suck it up for a few years. Personally, I would get your wife to stop work (if she was ok with that) or part time. The twins can still be with other kids and go to classes/clubs etc but working full time just to pay for childcare is insane IMO.

Great point. We need to engage with her employer and see if they would be flexible but her staying at home and going to classes would work - she loves them during maternity

[Lotus82]

ClaphamGT3 said:

I think some people should chill out and realise that the OP asked for constructive advice on how to make his money go further.......

Thank you.

[Lotus82]

DuraAce said:

Lotus82 said:

Quickly realising there is an us Vs them mentality forming in this post. That was not my intention at all an do wish ill on anyone, was just looking for advice.

I don't think its like that but only on PH could you get people on 100k+ who "struggle"

I know a lot of people (myself included) who earn way less and manage just fine.

Fair point.

[Lotus82]

Sheepshanks said:

SteveScooby said:

Lotus82 said:

If we both earned £49,999 each we would qualify for child benefit which our local tax office told me would be £33 (1st twin) + £14 (2nd twin) weekly, or £2,440 a year.

£20 for the first, £13.55 after that, unless it's different for twins

It's not. Someone has added the figures for 2 kids together to get the £33 figure.

The current rates are £20.50 + £13.55 = £1770 per year.

It reduces by 1% of the Child Benefit received for every £100 that your individual income is over £50,000. So at £60K it's all gone.

I see, so the £33 was accurate but for both children.

[Lotus82]

Some great comments, thanks everyone.

We are not 'struggling'. My post never said we were. We are adjusting to a new financial reality and that requires change. My post was intended to find out what others in a similar situation have done and see if I was missing anything.

I admit I was being naive in terms of state support and on that front I will shut my mouth.

I am not going to outline my financial situation. Well aware not sharing these figures may annoy some but I fear it will only stoke the fire.

Thanks to those who sympathise and everyone for contributing.

[Lotus82]

oyster said:

Lotus82 said:

DoubleSix said:

rich12 said:

You have a joint income of £110k and you are worrying how to survive with twins???
Spend less??

ttish answer there rich12, well done.

OP I feel your pain. Despite having higher income and less kids childcare is ruinous, and I have found it difficult.

Shame your employer doesnt do tax vouchers. I only qualify for the minimum but it helps me feel less sore.

Some people are lucky enough to have family that can do one day a week, is that an option?

Ultimately we have just had to change our lifestyle a lot. The flash cars have gone, paid down debt, and hammered down the outgoings on food especially. It's not fun when you are used to lifes fineries but I derive my pleasure from other things these days and perspective has shifted as a result.

It does get gradually easier but there's no doubting the 'squeezed middle' is a tough place right now.

Kids are worth it though eh?

I'm glad there are other people in a similar position.

I feel like I am being targeted. If we both earned £49,999 a year we would get £'000's in handouts, however we don't and for a period during maternity we will go 3 months on my wage alone - that will be no fun at all.

Sorry OP. You've got it very lucky.

Not because of your salaries - you've worked hard for those.

But because of the bit in bold - you do know what most women get is 3 months at 90% and that's it?

I was not clear; wife received 6 weeks at 90%, then 30 weeks at a statutory weekly rate, then nothing for the last 16 weeks with nothing. It was these 16 weeks (4 months not 3 as per my original comment) I was referring too.

[Lotus82]

With these feet said:

Is it the case that the twins will be in childcare 5 days a week?

Aiming for a 4 day week but waiting to hear from her employer about what flexible solutions they can offer.

[Lotus82]

walm said:

The OP wanted reassurance that children will ruin him financially.
And I am here to give that.

Many thanks.

Edited by Lotus82 on Wednesday 1st April 20:01

[Lotus82]

okgo said:

Well he could be a collossal tit then if he lives in some wkpit in Worksop. Or he could be genuinely feeling a pinch if he lives in Barnes in a 3 bed cottage, who knows. Stupid thread if not going to provide any detail on the biggest outgoing most people have in their mortgage.

I have a 4 bed detached in Knutsford, Cheshire. Purchased in 2010 with 18 years and 79% of the mortgage remaining.

Since original post have researched mortgage extensions. Extending the repayment period is a viable way to reduce costs for however long is necessary.

Edited by Lotus82 on Wednesday 1st April 19:59