Spending a proportion of house sale money on private rent.

[Wolfer]

Hi,

I’m in a bit of a predicament, where I’m not sure if I’m being a tight-ass or just careful, would like some input as feel maybe I’m being selfish.

Split last year with ex-wife, house went up for sale, that all went through fine, money in the bank now.
In the meantime, approximately 6 months ago I met someone new, fell in love, and pretty much spend all my spare time with her (and her daughter). Things going very well, discussing the future and all that.

House that she rents is very small (and I come with a lot of crap!) so we have been talking about renting somewhere together bigger with more room, for both us and her daughter who’s studying at the moment.

We have found, and have first refusal on a property to rent, which seems perfect, more space, plenty of space for cars and storage for my crap. And we have been looking forward to moving in.

Problem – she has just started a course to help with her career, where most of her hours will now be voluntary, meaning less pay, quite a lot less. But in a year’s time, she will be able to get a better job and earn more money straight away.

So, the only thing we came up with is use 10k from my house sale to pay for the rent for 1 year. That way, we have spare cash per month including for her daughter.

This will be nearly 20% of the house money, and I have been a little less than enthusiastic shall I say. I wanted to invest that money for our future, or wait till we can afford the house we want in a few years and have a good deposit.

So, other than that option, I move out / we stay apart for a year, (she will be better off while training with me not there as she will get help) and we get a place together in a year’s time once she is fully qualified.

Is it mad to spend a chunk of house sale money on rent for a year, or am I being a tight git?!

[Wolfer]

Dejay1788 said:

Where are you living now? Will the cost of where you live now not cover the new place?

Hi,

Due to still paying a mortgage until it was sold, I stayed some nights with my partner, some with my sister, and even some with the spiders at the old house.

At the talking about the future stage originally, we would have had the money per month to live and be reasonably well off in the new place, or where she is now.

[Wolfer]

condor said:

You could consider the £10K rent as investing in your new partner and your future together.

See, this is what i'm thinking (while also being worried about anything going wrong)

[Wolfer]

Ok, you see, these replies are helping.

I believe I am ready to commit, Call me over-cautious, but I did need to think what some strangers looking from the outside thought.

Mates are good, but when I mentioned doing this, it was pretty much "no mate, go 50/50 with everything, look what happened last time" etc.

Cheers

[Wolfer]

mangos said:

I split last year with the husband and also 6 months later found someone and fell in love.

My ex had hidden a lot from me so I didn't come out with near close to what I should have done financially.

Its made me very cautious of people and despite living with my new man and feeling like he is far more trust worthy than my ex I would not share things financially with him right yet, and i am not too sure if I ever will again.

I was with my ex for 15 years so obviously my trust was misplaced for a long time.

I am looking at buying a house now with my new man but will protect myself and the money I am putting in first and foremost.

Thanks,

Yes, I was with my ex-wife for 20 years. Although she never hid anything from me, or indeed did the dirty on me, I am too, that little cautious. Mainly as I thought I knew where my life was going, and if it gets pulled from me again, less some money to fall back on, guess it makes me a bit twitchy!