Introducing a toddler to our Staffy

[durbster]

This is a bit of a horrible situation so I'll briefly explain - my brother and his wife were killed in a car crash a few weeks ago (hit head on by a Land Rover that came over a hill on their side of the road). Astonishingly, their three year old son survived and my wife and I are going to be his new parents.

His recovery has been astonishing. This time one month ago he was completely broken and in Intensive Care but now it's looking very likely he'll be discharged within a week - far quicker than any of us dared hope. This hasn't given us much time to prepare!

We don't currently have any kids so this will be a big change for the dog. We're not expecting any issues because she's as soft as grease. We've always made sure she's spent lots of time around kids since we got her so she knows how to behave with them (she won't jump up at small kids, will take treats from them very slowly etc.).

She also knows my nephew - they've chased each other around and she's licked his ears many times.

Nevertheless, him coming to live with us may be different so I thought I'd ask people who have done it to find out what sort of things to expect from both the dog and the toddler.

I'm sure many people have introduced kids to dogs as they move in with partners and such like so I would appreciate any advice or tips people might have to make the process as easy as possible.

The only step I've taken so far is to bring one of his stinky t-shirts and leave that around the house so she gets used to his scent.

[durbster]

Thanks all, some great ideas there.

I'll let you know how it goes.

[durbster]

Tiggsy said:

I used to put honey on my kids ears, have them lie on the floor, face down - hands in pockets...and see how long they could last with my English BT (8 secs was the record)

I don't think we'd need the honey - kids seem to encourage our Staffy which doesn't help. They'll lie on the floor knowing full well she'll be over to lick their ears and then when she does they pretend they don't like it... before doing it again...

and again...

and again.

[durbster]

Yep, he's home and settling in OK and the dog has been immaculate.

She was a bit upset at first, not least because of the mountain of "stuff" that came with the little lad, but all she did was come over to us for reassurance every now and then. I was bit worried she might bother him while we were asleep as his bed's only a couple of inches off the floor but I watched her and she just stood at the door wagging her tail.

The only issue was that she kept licking his face (which still a few wounds on it) at every opportunity and because both his legs were broken and aren't quite back to strength yet, the poor lad can't escape

She's got the message now though and leaves him be.

Obviously we won't leave them alone together but I'm happy there won't be any issues. He's really fond of her so I think she'll be an excellent tonic for him. He dragged himself across the sofa this morning to give her a stroke.

[durbster]

ali_kat said:

Was thinking of you last night, how are you getting on now?

Thanks for asking. I haven't been sure how to reply to this question if I'm honest, so I'll just keep it simple.

We're doing fine, basically. It's been the hardest couple of years of our lives but that was expected and we've got good families around us so they've helped us out when things have got a bit too much.

The boy's doing really well at school and so far there are few emotional scars. He often stuns us with a question at us out of the blue but we just answer honestly and frankly and he seems fine with that.

There are ongoing issues with his legs but we don't think they're insurmountable. They don't stop him running and jumping around, just perhaps not quite as fast or as high as the other kids. That he's walking at all is bloody remarkable so we'll take that.

To bring it on topic, the dog's been flawless although it has been quite stressful for her. She hates the loud noises - especially the tantrums - and just starts shaking if things kick off. She's figured out the best solution is to go and stand in the garden until it's over so we're thinking of getting her a kennel for the winter so she can still go and escape (we'd like one in the house but haven't really got room).

The dog suffers from effectively being the younger sibling so gets bullied and blamed for things, naturally. She knows to just walk away when she's had enough so we're trying to educate the boy so he recognises that situation. We don't leave them on their own together but to be honest that's mainly for the dog's sake.

When they're outside in particular they play wonderfully together and she's perfectly happy trotting around after him, and sitting patiently while he puts various things on her head.