Betterware Barsts

[HD Adam]

A little background.

My dear old Mother in Law lives about 500 yards from us and is 93.
She wants to be independent and so remains at home with daily visits from various help and of course, my wife.

Now, she is getting a bit senile and is unfailingly polite. Betterware (local rep) keeps leaving catalogs with her and she inevitably buys some hideous piece of useless tat much like the Elvis Dambusters Clock Plate of Tutankamen and then gives it to my wife as she is trying to "help".
My wife then feels obliged to accept whatever piece of crap has been purchased and rather than just dump in in the bin at the end of the drive, brings it home.

So, they obviously see her as an easy mark and are taking advantage of a daft old woman.
I've told her not to buy anything else and also put a very polite notice near her front door explaining "No catalogs please"

Of course, I know where they live. They put their name and address on the brochure.
I would prefer to collect all this st, take it back to their house, get the money back, explain why this has to stop and finish off by bumming their dog with frozen sausages.
Mrs HD, knowing my slightly confrontational nature would prefer that I didn't.

Anyone dealt with anything similar or have a sensible plan of action?

[HD Adam]

Kiltie said:

HD Adam said:

So, they obviously see her as an easy mark and are taking advantage of a daft old woman.

Is there any possibility that she likes the Betterware person, looks forward to their visits and the buying of the tat is just part of an arrangement which suits everyone ... except you?

HD Adam said:

I've told her not to buy anything else and also put a very polite notice near her front door explaining "No catalogs please"

Have you ask yourself if this is definately the correct thing to do? ... or could it be that it's just what you think is right?

Please take these questions the way they're intended.

I'm going through a difficult time with very elderly parents right now and I've recently come to accept that what I see as correct and logical isn't necessarily the right thing.

No, I'm right.

If the Betterware bloke wants to pop round for a cuppa and not take her money, then I'd be happy with that.
But they don't. It's an easy sale for them because, as I said, she feels obliged as it's their "job" and they've made an effort to go round.
It would be somewhat easier if they just opened her purse and nicked a tenner every week as I wouldn't have to store various Winged Chavtat Horses but this is not something she needs to be spending her pension money on.

She doesn't lack for company in any way. I think (know) she's being taken for a ride and I don't like it.

[HD Adam]

Marvtec said:

OP certainly is trying hard to keep most of the estate for him & his wife, grumbling over the occasional £5 betterware purchase.

There is no estate. We bought her the house she now lives in. She has nothing but her weekly pension.
We pay privately for a carer to go in every day to get her up, give her breakfast, get her in the shower and then come back and get her lunch for her.
My wife or daughters go round in the evening to get her a cooked dinner.

Really, she should be in a home but she doesn't want to go into one. I respect her wishes so she is taken care of. Maybe that will change soon.
We tell her not to open the door to anyone. She is one of those old ladies who would fall prey to a dodgy builder or driveway specialist.

We have left notes in the catalog bag, thrown various away and left a note on the door. None of this has worked, hence my view that they are taking the piss.

Thank you all for your insights and suggestions. I'm home for 2 weeks so this will get stopped now.

[HD Adam]

Kiltie said:

Are you sure, in your heart, that the Betterware thing might not be one of the last "choices" she has?

Kiltie, in all honesty, she's at the stage in her life where if you knocked on her door and offered her some magic beans, she'd buy them and probably hold out her purse for you to take the right money because she can't see very well.

She thinks she's "helping" us out buy buying us useful things but it's not that.
She can spend her own money as she sees fit but I firmly believe that she is being ripped off.
I believe that the Betterware rep sees her as an easy mark given that I have asked politely (via notes) for them to please stop this.
God know how many other vulnerable little old ladies in the village make up their round. Yes, I'm making assumptions but I'll bet I'm close.

As it's the season of good will, I will be going round tomorrow with Mrs HD so it stays civil and ask them to stop in person.

Sausages are in the freezer as back up

[HD Adam]

Pit Pony said:

Nail up her postbox, and put a sign on it saying where to post the MIL's mail, then you can burn all the junk mail before she gets it.

Even better. Invite her to stay with you and rent out her house to a nice family, and use the money to take her on some nice holidays.

All good points except for they knock on her door and our house is not suitable for her in her present condition.
She lives in a bungalow and her bathroom is converted to a wet room as she is on a walker and cannot really step up or down.
Anything more than shuffling around the house is a wheelchair job unfortunately and she doesn't like to go away any more.
We used to take her to see her sister out in Spain until a few years ago but health insurance for her is a bit iffy and she doesn't like the ignominy of being loaded onto the plane like a piece of freight.

Thanks though for the suggestion.