Life after Death? The mechanics of it?

[daemon]

Ok, so all religions have this notion of life after death, but has anyone really thought through how that might work?

So, God has set out all these instructions in the old and new testaments, only some of which we have to follow - for example, we dont really have to follow the not working on a sunday one, because if we did we'd have to kill everyone who did, and if anyone commits adultery they have to be stoned to death, but the ones like "be nice to people" we have to keep. And probably not the "not being rich" one because everyone knows you having to slum it in a 3 year old merc isnt really the same as all those people starving in africa with no money to buy food.

So, anyways, you get to heaven. Jesus says it ok for you to go on in, because he has had a look at your entire life and you seemed to be a Nice Person.

So, you get in there and theres Aunt Mabel who smelt of wee, and cousin George who you couldnt stand because he was boring, etc, etc but everyone has to be really nice to everyone because its heaven.

And then theres the whole "everyone gets a mansion" thing. Surely the whole point of having a mansion is because noone else has? And whos going to clean it? Are there cleaners in heaven?

And do you work, and if not, what do you do all day? I get bored after a fortnight off.

Is there SKY movies to watch, or games consoles?

I take it there are no cars?

Does everyone sit around and read extracts from the bible and look solemn?

Just cant say i'm really sold on the whole eternal life thing. Just seems to unravel a bit when you start to think about it.

[daemon]

And whats with the whole "faith" thing?

God loves us that much that he wont prove he exists, so you have to be really good and behave and he has to watch over us all and confirm we've been good and then when we die we might get in to heaven? Otherwise we burn in hell?

Is it not like a big eternal game of hide and seek?

Surely it would be easier all round if he just manifested himself somewhere - and not to some obscure tribe pottering around the desert - and then we could all just get on with it and do the whole worship thing if thats your bag?

Instead of being "punished" because gods been too aloof?

[daemon]

And what happened to all those people who were around before christianity?

You know, minding their own business being pagans or something?

Didnt know any better. Did they go to hell? Hardly seems fair?

[daemon]

Paddy_N_Murphy said:

Mafffew said:

austinsmirk said:

wouldn'f fancy backing Islam, and arriving to be faced with 40 virgins. You want to be faced with a nicely skilled women in her 20's or 30's.

Exactly! Why anyone would actually want 40 virgins is a bit beyond me. It's difficult enough dealing with one bird who hasn't a fecking clue, let alone going through 40.

Do the 40 Virgins age ? and if you have an eternity with them, how long until you move on to the 'Next one' ? Is it 8,000Yrs per Virgin ? and then after 32,000 years all are 'damaged goods' so to speak ?
Or do they remain virgins ? How'd that work?

Is Mary one of them ? Or is that akin to crossing the streams ?

And whats in it for the 40 virgins? I'll be honest - i'm past my peak.

Has someone set an expectation there with them that realistically cant be met?

[daemon]

kiseca said:

Either way, I think the druids are fked

The gold one always annoyed me anyway. Bit of a complainer.

[daemon]

Butter Face said:

I have sometimes imagined just how much more amazing and fantastic this world would be if religion itself had never been invented. If we'd never put (most of) the course of human history in the hands of Sky Fairies, how much better (or possibly worse) would this planet be?

Given how many centuries were lost to the dark ages, we'd probably have been where we are now hundreds of years ago.

[daemon]

HTP99 said:

Timmy40 said:

HTP99 said:

Yes but doesn't the Christian God always forgive; so it doesn't really matter what you get up to in your life as you will be forgiven and will go to Heaven anyway, so long as Christianity is "the" religion!

Not so, that's why there's a Hell. With purgatory in the middle for the yet to be classified.

I was brought up a Christian within the CofE; have been Baptised and Confirmed, shows how much I remember.

However I now remember my father in law suggesting to us that our daughters would be stuck in purgatory because we wouldn't have them baptised. Fortunately he is no longer in our lives after buggering off and getting involved with some extreme Methodists.

The whole notion of purgatory was never based on anything actually written in the bible was it?

Was it not originally a handy way for Catholicism to keep their "flock" in line by telling them their loved ones were not yet in heaven or hell and they could influence that with their behaviour / "contributions" to the church?

I thought the catholic church had distanced itself from the notion of purgatory?

[daemon]

Would you not have thought that if god was going to tell people all about himself through dreams, visions, appearing in burning bushes he would at some point have said "by the way lads, the worlds actually round, not flat"?

[daemon]

standards said:

HTP99 said:

However I now remember my father in law suggesting to us that our daughters would be stuck in purgatory because we wouldn't have them baptised. Fortunately he is no longer in our lives after buggering off and getting involved with some extreme Methodists.

I think he'll find it's Limbo that the unbaptised go to, although it's not very fashionable any more.

Extreme Methodists. Now that I would like to see!

Did Jesus change his mind about purgatory?

[daemon]

standards said:

daemon said:

Did Jesus change his mind about purgatory?

I don't think the Good Lord mentions it.
It's a Catholic thing-the least pain in Purgatory is worse than the least pain on earth and all that. To purify one's soul (although minus the body how does it hurt?) to enter the Beatific Vision.

I last studied this full time in the 70s so my memory might be less than perfect.
Again!

Yes, that was my understanding.

It must be great to have a religion whereby you can make up the rules as you go along and pick and chose from the holy books whenever suits.

Genuinely. I chose the wrong profession.

[daemon]

Ayahuasca said:

Heaven = infinite parallel heavens.

Mine = island, perfect climate, cool woods, warm beaches, tumbling streams, a private race track with a collection of Ferraris for my pleasure, etc, etc.

With a portal to an infinite number of alternative heavens.

Yours = whatever you want.

And have you any religious basis for that? I think the christian heaven seems to be about sitting around reading extracts from the bible and looking solemn?

[daemon]

knitware said:

A while ago I was on YouTube looking at a certain car review and after clinking other links ended up watching a Muslim dude converting a man to Islam, like you do, anyway. The converter was explaining about heaven and describing how when you die and go to heaven you will get a house, and that the house will be made of gold and that there will be beautiful woman.

Now here is my problem. I could go along with God chatting to a bloke on a hill and doing good and all the other things but where I thought bull crap was the house and gold.

A house is a human need, something needed to shelter us from the elements, wind, rain and cold even heat, why would I need that if I was dead, a spirit or a ball of energy, likewise I don't need beautiful woman as, well I'll be passed that sort of thing but what upset me more was the gold.

Why gold? Gold is only precious because man decided it's precious, it's an element and that's it. It doesn't give us energy or life, it's nothing but perhaps shiny and a good conductor of heat. Why not a house made of another element like yttrium or lead?

This dude's gambit was 'what does the bible say about heaven? The bible says nothing'. Well, in this instance the bible is more believable than a house made of gold. Is that really what a billion people are praying for? Ludicrous.

Its almost like religion is man made#

Having said that, Islam seems to be a better reconciled religion as they go for the line that God has sent prophets all through history to give man the religion he needs. Hence they get around the whole thing of their religion being formed a relatively short time ago and all the old historic religions because its just the next generation of religion, given to them by the prophet Mohammed, and as such they respect all other religions.

As opposed to the "we're right and everyone else is wrong" view of Christianity.

I mean if you're going to form a Sun God religion then its good to loop in other faiths.

Edited by daemon on Wednesday 6th May 21:18

Edited by daemon on Wednesday 6th May 21:19

Edited by daemon on Thursday 7th May 13:30

[daemon]

vanordinaire said:

ewenm said:

We live on after death in the memories of our friends and relatives and in the ongoing results of our actions when alive.

Sixth post of the thread. This is the answer to the OP's question. All the rest is nonsense or irrelevant.

Yes. quite.

Hence why i dont really "get" the whole need for religion. It seems such vanity to think we should live forever.

Happy to live my life and die. In fact i'd quite rather not to have been bothered in the first place, but now i'm here i may as well get on with it.