Discussion
I tend to be a fairly tolerant chap, and to be fair live in a part of London where tolerance of other races, creeds cultures and tastes is an absolute necessity. However, there was an incident last night which simply made me have to count to 10 before actually killing the mouth-breathing moron concerned.
I’m cycling home, and spy a bunch of youths (twenties, not teenagers) on a street corner. No problem. Except, it soon transpires, this bunch are out to prove their manhood. By stepping out in front of traffic unexpectedly. Now, god help me, but I could not stop it time – whether I could have stopped or not, causing a traffic pile-up and most likely death to myself, is yours to decide; but let’s just say that my reaction times were a little slower than optimum, for whatever reason you care to infer. So when I hit him, I must have still been doing about 10-15mph. The last thing I saw was sheer surprise on his stupid, Neanderthal face as I got my head down and my helmet hit him in the face.
He got off the floor, his mates came running over, at which point it got ugly, as you can imagine. By this stage I was incandescent with rage, started threatening to break heads if any one of them even dreamed of stepping closer, at which point they decided I wasn’t worth the hassle, and left. Unfortunately, as they left, one punched me, and I lost it. I’m a boxer, and my punch caught him in the jaw. He went down like a sack of potatoes. The other two, cowards as they were, ran for it. At this point I realised I was in trouble anyway, so I resisted the temptation to give him a parting kick, and seethed all the way home.
I fully expected a call from the police, for defending myself against superior numbers. So I called into this morning, and told them what had happened. They basically made me feel like a criminal, despite the fact that I neither provoked the incident, nor threw the first blow. If these idiots complain, I could face charges – and the best thing is, the police are actually going to look for the “victims”. Are they going to solve some real crime? No. But they are going to spend officer hours on tracking down these idiots and asking them if they would like to press charges. Luckily, I’m not stupid, and got several witnesses (motorists who stopped last night) who will support my assertion that it was self defence.
So, what the
kind of state is our country in?
1) the protagonist. I detest the way you waste oxygen while spending all of your time watching MTV in your council house and trying to emulate the utterly sh1t music you hear all day on Kiss FM. In any other age, you would be dead for lack of IQ or survival skills. But I hate everything about you, from your stupid braided hairstyle, to the fact that you play your brain numbingly awful music loud on your sh1t mobile phone, to your stupid baggy jeans and your idiot drooling facial expression. Frankly, I would like nothing better than to beat you with a tyre iron until there was little left of you but a smear on the pavement, you stupid, ignorant, worthless, pig-ugly waste of space. I hate the fact that you think you’re some kind of gangsta when I can fell you with one good blow and your lazy, shambling, cowardly friends run away. I wish I were an officer in Iraq and you were a in my battalion, as I’d send you walking out to clear minefields, just to make sure that my field supplies wouldn’t have to be wasted on you and your despicable ilk. What do you do with your time? What contribution to our country do you make? And what the juddering fcuk is that stupid language you purport to speak? You were born here. You were schooled here. You do not live in South Central LA, Haiti, Sierra Leone or wherever the hell else that idiot patois comes from – SPEAK ENGLISH! I realise that linguistic skills are largely beyond your tiny brain, but some sort of effort can’t be beyond you, can it, you mindless ape? I wish I had been in my car yesterday, as the savage joy I would have felt at booting it and watching your twitching corpse get run over by the van behind me after you went over my roof would have been worth the lawyer’s fees required to get me off. I hope you DIE. In fact I hope you die painfully, and take at least 5 others of your moron clan with you, youing tt.
2) The policeman from this morning. I realise that you joined the force because you were bullied at school and thought that a uniform would get you the girls and the respect that your weeny little frame and distinctly sub-par intellect denied you during your formative years. I realise that your basically inadequate personality finds solace in the trappings of petty officialdom. But even so, basic common sense should tell you that I am a law-abiding citizen pushed to extreme behaviour by the very people that your stupid bureaucracy and the window-licking idiots you seem to employ are meant to catch and incarcerate. Youing cowards are too afraid to venture out and catch people who need catching, but I watched you drooling at the thought of an easy prosecution, and put up with your cowardly, idiotic, affirmative action bullshit for long enough to want to take you outside and rearrange your already repulsive facial features, you stupid little man. Do you imagine you are doing any good in that once respected profession of yours? Do you think anyone respects you? Do you wonder that they laugh at you and call you names to your face, knowing that you are impotent, valueless and a waste of taxpayers’ money? I hate the way you peered myopically at me through your glasses, you speccy gimp, and the way that your uniform looked like it hadn’t been ironed in a week. What pride is there left if you can’t even be bothered to look like a policeman – you resembled some faceless clerk from the bowels of the home office which, let’s face it, is really all you are anymore, you utter, utter ballsack of a human being. I hope that your end is messy, ill-advised and at the hands of one of the prolific criminal class that you and your inept kind have failed, in every single way, to control or deter.
3) Labour. In the decade or so that you’ve been in power you have taken virtually every problem that this country had and made it spectacularly worse. But today, let’s focus on law and order (or lack of). Your stewardship of this country has seen the underclass breed like rats and run amok, impacting on the lives of all of us that don’t suck benefits, who pay our taxes, and obey your laws. You know, I can’t even be bothered – there’s too much. Suffice it to say that you are a government of incompetents, led, sheep like, by a succession of leaders in thrall to America, a country which no-one but the insane should regard as the shining beacon of the free world. You are a herd of charlatans, a parliament of fools, and a collection of the most mean, petty and cowardly individuals that it is possible to assemble in one organisation. Your country is a joke, and your mediocre talents and weak ideologies only serve to drag everyone else down with you. You have built a society where murder goes unpunished, but hard work and ambition are thwarted as far as possible, strangled by the politics of envy. I hope you all burn in hell, from the prime minister to the lowliest civil servant in his pointless sinecure.
4) The underclass. It is you, you shower, that vote these people in time and time again. Held in their thrall by benefits and handouts, you are bringing the rest of us down with you. While the middle classes need to shoulder the blame for opening the door to Labour and their ghastly social re-engineering, it is you, you awful sacks of flesh, that keep the door to the horror open. You contribute nothing, and your horrid children roam the streets creating havoc where they go, marginalising the dwindling numbers of decent citizens left. You read the Mail and whine about immigration, while contributing nothing yourselves. I hate you, bunch of evolutionary dead ends. I hate everything about you, from your miserable tastes for reality television through to your stultifying effects on the rest of humanity. When I get my three wishes, one will involve an assault rifle and a lack of accountability, you utter scum.
5) Russell Brand. You have nothing to do with any of this this, but I just have the overwhelming urge to rip your spine out, you prick.
I’m cycling home, and spy a bunch of youths (twenties, not teenagers) on a street corner. No problem. Except, it soon transpires, this bunch are out to prove their manhood. By stepping out in front of traffic unexpectedly. Now, god help me, but I could not stop it time – whether I could have stopped or not, causing a traffic pile-up and most likely death to myself, is yours to decide; but let’s just say that my reaction times were a little slower than optimum, for whatever reason you care to infer. So when I hit him, I must have still been doing about 10-15mph. The last thing I saw was sheer surprise on his stupid, Neanderthal face as I got my head down and my helmet hit him in the face.
He got off the floor, his mates came running over, at which point it got ugly, as you can imagine. By this stage I was incandescent with rage, started threatening to break heads if any one of them even dreamed of stepping closer, at which point they decided I wasn’t worth the hassle, and left. Unfortunately, as they left, one punched me, and I lost it. I’m a boxer, and my punch caught him in the jaw. He went down like a sack of potatoes. The other two, cowards as they were, ran for it. At this point I realised I was in trouble anyway, so I resisted the temptation to give him a parting kick, and seethed all the way home.
I fully expected a call from the police, for defending myself against superior numbers. So I called into this morning, and told them what had happened. They basically made me feel like a criminal, despite the fact that I neither provoked the incident, nor threw the first blow. If these idiots complain, I could face charges – and the best thing is, the police are actually going to look for the “victims”. Are they going to solve some real crime? No. But they are going to spend officer hours on tracking down these idiots and asking them if they would like to press charges. Luckily, I’m not stupid, and got several witnesses (motorists who stopped last night) who will support my assertion that it was self defence.
So, what the
kind of state is our country in?1) the protagonist. I detest the way you waste oxygen while spending all of your time watching MTV in your council house and trying to emulate the utterly sh1t music you hear all day on Kiss FM. In any other age, you would be dead for lack of IQ or survival skills. But I hate everything about you, from your stupid braided hairstyle, to the fact that you play your brain numbingly awful music loud on your sh1t mobile phone, to your stupid baggy jeans and your idiot drooling facial expression. Frankly, I would like nothing better than to beat you with a tyre iron until there was little left of you but a smear on the pavement, you stupid, ignorant, worthless, pig-ugly waste of space. I hate the fact that you think you’re some kind of gangsta when I can fell you with one good blow and your lazy, shambling, cowardly friends run away. I wish I were an officer in Iraq and you were a in my battalion, as I’d send you walking out to clear minefields, just to make sure that my field supplies wouldn’t have to be wasted on you and your despicable ilk. What do you do with your time? What contribution to our country do you make? And what the juddering fcuk is that stupid language you purport to speak? You were born here. You were schooled here. You do not live in South Central LA, Haiti, Sierra Leone or wherever the hell else that idiot patois comes from – SPEAK ENGLISH! I realise that linguistic skills are largely beyond your tiny brain, but some sort of effort can’t be beyond you, can it, you mindless ape? I wish I had been in my car yesterday, as the savage joy I would have felt at booting it and watching your twitching corpse get run over by the van behind me after you went over my roof would have been worth the lawyer’s fees required to get me off. I hope you DIE. In fact I hope you die painfully, and take at least 5 others of your moron clan with you, you
ing tt.2) The policeman from this morning. I realise that you joined the force because you were bullied at school and thought that a uniform would get you the girls and the respect that your weeny little frame and distinctly sub-par intellect denied you during your formative years. I realise that your basically inadequate personality finds solace in the trappings of petty officialdom. But even so, basic common sense should tell you that I am a law-abiding citizen pushed to extreme behaviour by the very people that your stupid bureaucracy and the window-licking idiots you seem to employ are meant to catch and incarcerate. You
ing cowards are too afraid to venture out and catch people who need catching, but I watched you drooling at the thought of an easy prosecution, and put up with your cowardly, idiotic, affirmative action bullshit for long enough to want to take you outside and rearrange your already repulsive facial features, you stupid little man. Do you imagine you are doing any good in that once respected profession of yours? Do you think anyone respects you? Do you wonder that they laugh at you and call you names to your face, knowing that you are impotent, valueless and a waste of taxpayers’ money? I hate the way you peered myopically at me through your glasses, you speccy gimp, and the way that your uniform looked like it hadn’t been ironed in a week. What pride is there left if you can’t even be bothered to look like a policeman – you resembled some faceless clerk from the bowels of the home office which, let’s face it, is really all you are anymore, you utter, utter ballsack of a human being. I hope that your end is messy, ill-advised and at the hands of one of the prolific criminal class that you and your inept kind have failed, in every single way, to control or deter. 3) Labour. In the decade or so that you’ve been in power you have taken virtually every problem that this country had and made it spectacularly worse. But today, let’s focus on law and order (or lack of). Your stewardship of this country has seen the underclass breed like rats and run amok, impacting on the lives of all of us that don’t suck benefits, who pay our taxes, and obey your laws. You know, I can’t even be bothered – there’s too much. Suffice it to say that you are a government of incompetents, led, sheep like, by a succession of leaders in thrall to America, a country which no-one but the insane should regard as the shining beacon of the free world. You are a herd of charlatans, a parliament of fools, and a collection of the most mean, petty and cowardly individuals that it is possible to assemble in one organisation. Your country is a joke, and your mediocre talents and weak ideologies only serve to drag everyone else down with you. You have built a society where murder goes unpunished, but hard work and ambition are thwarted as far as possible, strangled by the politics of envy. I hope you all burn in hell, from the prime minister to the lowliest civil servant in his pointless sinecure.
4) The underclass. It is you, you shower, that vote these people in time and time again. Held in their thrall by benefits and handouts, you are bringing the rest of us down with you. While the middle classes need to shoulder the blame for opening the door to Labour and their ghastly social re-engineering, it is you, you awful sacks of flesh, that keep the door to the horror open. You contribute nothing, and your horrid children roam the streets creating havoc where they go, marginalising the dwindling numbers of decent citizens left. You read the Mail and whine about immigration, while contributing nothing yourselves. I hate you, bunch of evolutionary dead ends. I hate everything about you, from your miserable tastes for reality television through to your stultifying effects on the rest of humanity. When I get my three wishes, one will involve an assault rifle and a lack of accountability, you utter scum.
5) Russell Brand. You have nothing to do with any of this this, but I just have the overwhelming urge to rip your spine out, you prick.
- edited for a couple of typos
Edited by Harry Flashman on Friday 21st September 17:10
outlaw... said:
what the you go and confess to the rozzers for ?
'cos I'm an idiot, and given the proximity of CCTV to the incident didn't want a knock on the door. you go and confess to the rozzers for ?God, I'm stupid - should have known; when I was mugged and fought back, right under the railway station cameras, the cops told me that there was nothing they could do as the cameras didn't work. Should have learned my lesson.
dr.sickman said:
Hmmm. Not 100% convinced. There is plenty of content, and a nice helicoptered aproach to the situation, watching the earth dwindle away as your sights expand to a litany of hatred for every soul.
Somehow, though, I fear a lack of real blood curling intent. I mean real vitriol.
7.
eta. ok 8. and a half.
I lost all control and smacked some chap in the street, in front of witnesses – how much more intent do you want??Somehow, though, I fear a lack of real blood curling intent. I mean real vitriol.
7.
eta. ok 8. and a half.
Edited by dr.sickman on Thursday 20th September 12:07
But fair point. The day has not arrived where I have access to a Kalashnikov and immunity from jailtime. But come that day…
outlaw... said:
Harry Flashman said:
outlaw... said:
what the you go and confess to the rozzers for ?
'cos I'm an idiot, and given the proximity of CCTV to the incident didn't want a knock on the door. you go and confess to the rozzers for ?God, I'm stupid - should have known; when I was mugged and fought back, right under the railway station cameras, the cops told me that there was nothing they could do as the cameras didn't work. Should have learned my lesson.
that said i dout the one you chined will be making a complaint.
Appreciated, fellows. As soon as I’ve gone postal with an automatic weapon around the housing estates of South London, I’ll be on my laptop, venting spleen on PH as the police break down my door to take me away. You’ll hear it first.
They all deserve to die. No, really.
Bob - any space for a fugitive/hired gun out in Kazakhstan, friend?
Edited by Harry Flashman on Thursday 20th September 12:40
MilnerR said:
It's quite stressful, as a law abiding citizen, if you do something that could land you in a lot of shit. About 11 years ago I was confronted by a guy who first asked me for change then demanded money and then tried to mug me, I pushed him, he threw a punch and I returned the complement. He obviously wasn't expecting a response and walked straight onto it. I had put all 13.5 stones at the back of it and the guy hit the pavement at an impressive rate of knots. He was out cold for about 1-2 mins. These were the longest 1-2 mins of my life. I thought I'd killed him! I was knelt there over a prone figure at 3am in a residential street willing this guy to come round and get up. Eventually he regained his senses and started trying to get to his feet. At this point I decided it was best to leg it. For the next 2 weeks i was expecting a knock on the door......
You should have nicked his wallet. Karma, and all that.outlaw... said:
Harry Flashman said:
Chaps, all these handbags on this thread are a bit off, to be honest with you. Take it outside onto the street
WHERE I CAN PUNCH YOU IN THE FACE.
Thanks!
shoory m8 a fooking up you tread it want your fault m8WHERE I CAN PUNCH YOU IN THE FACE.
Thanks!
I would gladly take envy outside.
Feel free to post some other rage though. I'm in a more reflective mood today, and possibly a bit mellower. I've decided that I've got it wrong about wanting to randomly kill scumbags with an assault rifle. I'd rather use a chainsaw, you see.
Morning chaps. Given my current mood, I watched Outlaw last night. Largely disappointing, as Sean Bean's gang came across as bumbling and inept, not the professional outfit I was expecting. The dialogue was clumsy, and frankly all the rantings about 'nonces and scum' had shades of the Daily Mail about it.
Didn't stop me from wanting to procure an AK and rid the streets of our native scumbags, though.
Didn't stop me from wanting to procure an AK and rid the streets of our native scumbags, though.
jellison said:
I have been mulling over moving to france for a few years now (likley put it off for a few more - but think the way to go) - the UK is a TOTAL F*CKING TOILET NOW.
Hah. Try a weekend in Marseilles - if you think we've got problems, try urban areas in southern France. War zones.
Gassing Station | The Lounge | Top of Page | What's New | My Stuff