Anyone used a Doula?

[AAz01]

Sorry for the mumsnet type post. I'm looking for a more educated perspective than I'd find there.

Wife is currently pregnant for the first time. We're in Scotland so private maternity doesn't exist.
Our NHS experience so far has been about as crap as I expected. Nobody really cares or has time for us, it basically comes down to "Are you taking vitamins? Yes. Then GTFO"

Neither my wife or I have any medical training. I don't know how a "normal" birth is supposed to go, and I won't know whether something is going wrong or everything's normal. In an ideal world there will be experienced well-rested midwives constantly available to answer any questions and assist - but in reality I'm sure we'll have to deal with students who are tired and stretched to their limits.

So I'm thinking of hiring a Doula, simply so we have someone who is dedicated to us (rather than splitting her time between 30 screaming women) and has experienced enough births to tell us whether everything looks normal or if we need to find a doctor.

Having browsed through some Doula websites I feel I'm making a mistake. I'm not looking to worship my wife and other pregnant women as a goddesses and neither am I looking for spiritual guidance, aura healing, etc.
I've found a couple of private midwives, but they seem militantly pro-home-birth/anti-hospital-birth/anti-medical-intervention. Also they cost 8 times as much as a Doula.

Wife isn't bothered - she says if it'll make me feel better to have someone else there then go ahead, but she also doesn't want someone bothering her with spiritual mumbo-jumbo.

Opinions please?

[AAz01]

thainy77 said:

Hasn't your wife answered this for you?

No, she has also never used a Doula so doesn't know what type of service they'll provide.

el stovey said:

You're asking if you're better off in a hospital full of experts and medical equipment and operating theatres and emergency facilities or having a witch doctor deliver your baby?

I'm not sure you read my post or know what a Doula is. We will be in a hospital. A Doula does not deliver babies.

ashley95 said:

My mother is/was a Doula. Every one of her clients said they would never have another child without one.

I've seen (online) a few people saying the same thing, which is making me think a Doula is worth it especially as they're not overly expensive. I do have doubts about how helpful they'll be, but I guess it's better to have one there just in case they can offer any advice/assistance.

[AAz01]

scotlandtim said:

Where abouts in Scotland are you?

Can't recommend these folk enough - after a traumatic experience with Baby no 1 they made having baby no 2 almost pleasant!!

We're based in Scottish borders - give them a shout - they're great!

Thanks . We're a bit above Glasgow - probably too far from the Borders in case we need them quick-ish.

[AAz01]

Thanks for all the opinions, even the silly ones .

I am sceptical about whether a Doula will be helpful or just get in the way. Thing is - all of the sceptical opinions seem to come from people who haven't used one. During my googling, I saw almost everyone who has used one said they'll always use them again in future.

I guess we might as well then. There's potential they'll be helpful and really no downside other than the cost. It's about £500 which isn't bad. I would want a lot more than £500 if I was doing it.

FredClogs said:

Women have been having babies for a while, I don't know what you're expecting the NHS to do exactly, you did do biology at school, right?

Some of the poorest countries in the world - where organised healthcare basically doesn't exist - have a maternal mortality rate of approx 2%. Compared to Britain's 0.01% which is by no means the best.
So yes I have faith in the NHS to do the important things. They've been pretty crap so far for things like scans/midwife appointments but I'm sure they'll help if it's really needed.
However, the statistics show that "women have been having babies for a while" isn't a valid argument. Decent healthcare makes a big difference.
If my wife goes into labour at 4am on a night where 60 other local women go into labour, I would like to have someone experienced keeping an eye on her while the exhausted midwives are busy with other patients.


Regarding NCT - we're booked onto a 3 week course, but that's still a few weeks away. We're aware of their "don't let those butcher doctors near you with their knives" attitude, but it's probably still a valuable service.