Stripes for your Scirocco GTS

Want some cheese with your Christmas measure of port? Someone at VW is only too happy to oblige...

A thankless task writing press releases, especially when, to all intents and purposes, you're trying to titillate hacks into writing about an existing car now available with ... stripes and coloured door mirrors.

Want a stripey Scirocco? No? Didn't think so

Yup, that's your Scirocco GTS. Sadly not an official take on the track-prepped Scirocco our man Dale was punting about the Nordschleife not so long ago the GTS's exciting branding reveals itself to be little more than that. You can have white with black stripes and red mirrors, red with black stripes and white mirrors, black with ... ach, you get the idea. The only surprise is that VW hasn't gone the whole hog and done a special Scirocco xMAS limited edition with tinsel on the front and baubles dangling from the mirrors. Based on the R Line edition Scirocco, the GTS is, as they say, fully loaded and starts at £27,945 for the 210hp petrol manual. You can get it as a diesel too but, hey, let's not go there.

That press release though. We're guessing it may have been written after - or perhaps during - the VW Christmas party and the tortuous punning within deserves a hat tip, the GTS announced alongside a Fender (as in Stratocaster) special edition Beetle because, brace yourself, music fans have always liked The Beatles.

Beetle Fender edition - no, nor us

Things improve with nice name check for Spinal Tap's Smell The Glove in the monotone colour choice, ditto the boast of a volume knob that goes up to 11. It doesn't of course but you sense the person writing it was losing the will to live by that point. That or the suit who was going to sign it off had already knocked off for Christmas.

Hurry, the press release warns somewhat optimistically, because production of the Beetle Fender edition is limited...

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