Shed Of The Week: Jaguar XJ

A very presentable XJ for the cost of optioning a sunroof on a new XE?

Expectations are dodgy little blighters. When Shed joined the new Tesco dating website, he didn't expect to end up with a bag for life, but that unpleasant experience hasn't stopped him taking a 'glass half full' approach to his daily doings. Indeed, keeping his glass firmly topped up is something he sees as essential for the continuation of a vaguely tolerable existence.

Only one of these cars is yours for a grand

Buying a Jaguar that doesn't fall into the 'classic' category - which, limited run models apart, is more or less anything that came after the XJ-S - is all about managing expectations. The main expectation of course being that any used modern Jag under a grand will let you down horribly, but only after it has picked all the meat off your already thinly-draped financial skeleton.

This X300 gets off to a bad start by not having an MoT. According to the rules of Shedliness, possession of an MoT is an absolute must-have, but the vendor says he'll provide a freshly inked new one upon sale, and as far as Shed's concerned that's as full an MoT as it's possible to get.

Now, insider trading is a dirty business, but once again there comes a time when you've just got to bend the rules. The ad refers to an 'impending office move with limited parking'. Cynics will doubtless sneer and assume this to be a fib, just like those hoary old chestnuts 'the wife's having another baby so we need a more sensible motor' (real meaning: I've just discovered a terminal transmission problem); 'too many projects, I need to get rid of one' (something really nasty in the offing); 'emigrating his week' (car is stolen); and of course 'future classic, buy now before the prices go up' (so why aren't you keeping it?).

Some things might go wrong here. Might

But in this case we happen to know that the rationale for flogging this fine old heap is entirely true. Don't ask no questions and we'll tell you no lies, etc. And, yes, that is a familiar looking car park in one of the photos...

This is a nice example of the 3.2 Executive, arguably the nicest looking of the big saloons and presented here in a particularly fetching shade of blue. The sugar in your British tea will be the wonderful ride, the molasses refinement of the AJ16 six-pot, the feeling of all being right with the world and the fact that post-'94 Jaguars suffer far less from rust than you might think.

Now, there's no getting away from people who will tell you all the things that can plague the life of an X300 Jaguar owner. The list of potential ruination is long, and can include some, if not all of, or indeed more than the following: ABS modules, boot lock barrels, exhaust manifolds, idler pulleys, cam cover seals, O-rings and head gaskets, radiator mounting bushes, crankshaft position sensors, oxygen sensors, thermostats, fuel senders, power steering hoses, radios, speakers, door and brake light switches, clocks, auto-dim rear view mirrors, heated/memory seats, seat frames, headlamps, gearshifter J-gate lights, trim panels, steering wheel adjuster motors, cables, suspension bushes, headliners, information displays.

All this luxury for £1,000!

Basically, the nay-sayers will say, anything that can go wrong with it might well do so. But then you could say that about anything mechanical that's 18 years old and running on some of the worst roads in the western hemisphere.

If you've got just the slightest interest in owning a Jag but then fail to scratch that itch you'll be left wondering for ever more just what you might have missed. Taking the purchase cost into consideration, this Shed is probably as risk-free as it gets.

You may consider yourself a thoughtful and sensible person, but sometimes in life you've just got to bend the rules.

Here's the ad.

I've owned this car for just over a year and it's with an extremely heavy heart that I put it up for sale. Unfortunately due to an impending office move with limited parking it is now surplus to requirements and as much as I want to keep it, I cannot justify it.

3.2 Executive meaning it has all the toys and leather that were found on the XJR but with the 'baby' 3.2 litre engine. Reality is that it's a de-stroked version of the 4.0. It's had a couple of minor modifications in the form of a K&N induction kit (sounds epic at high RPM) and I fitted the XJR front grille, which vastly improves the look of the front.

The interior is pretty much mint in comparison with other similarly aged X300's. The paint colour is a very rare Antigua Blue which looks absolutely stunning in the sunshine. Also has a detachable tow bar and I've used it to tow my race car once before. Despite 15mpg when towing it tows extremely well.

Bad Points:
Air Con needs regassing
Paint peel on rear drivers side door (small patch)
Rear bumper chrome strip bent (most X300's have this issue)
Boot lock and electric ariel don't work - I know the problem but haven't had time to fix.
Currently is SORN with no MOT but will sell with a brand new MOT