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Ari

9,896 posts

101 months

[news] 
Thursday 15th August 2013 quote quote all
P-Jay said:
Sharp at a tack, my Wife, pragmatic, logical and reasonable 99% of the time. Then there's the 1% which just confuses the hell out of me, she'll make the bed, just to immediately get into it - she leaves for work at 6am, I get up about 7:30, I used to make the bed, but whichever way I do it is just shades of wrongness, she returns home at 9pm after 14-15 hours on her feet exhausted, dinner is on the table ready to go - I'm good like that, then we'll head up, she'll spend 20 mins making it perfectly, mirror smooth, completely symmetrical and the second it done, she'll unfold it all and get in.
The bed making thing is weird. Mine will always make the bed in a hotel room every day when we leave, even on the day we leave.

I've tried pointing out that they're going to strip the bed anyway but "that's not the point" apparently...

z4chris99

7,407 posts

65 months

[news] 
Thursday 15th August 2013 quote quote all
my ex was unbelievably clever, training to be a doctor. lacked all common sense and said the dumbest things on occasion

(she'll probably read this)

New POD

3,851 posts

36 months

[news] 
Thursday 15th August 2013 quote quote all
My wife seems to think that putting clothes on the radiator will cause it to burst into flames, because it's so hot.

She thinks that if I put a light in the shed it will burst into flames.

She thinks that if I run the tumble dryer in the garage at night the garage will burn, but it's fine in the day (Garage is 16 foot from the house so nobody would die)

24lemons

1,442 posts

71 months

[news] 
Thursday 15th August 2013 quote quote all
While attempting for the umpteenth time to reverse into the parking space with a car one side and a pillar the other, I suggested to my gf that it would be easier if she just drove straight into the vacant spot directly ahead. Her response? "No it wont because ill just have to reverse out of it".

While technically correct, the manoeuvre would have merely consisted of reversing into the traffic lane of the car park and not into a narrow spot, I opted to keep quiet as it wasnt worth arguing.

Kiltie

6,387 posts

132 months

[news] 
Thursday 15th August 2013 quote quote all
funkyrobot said:
fiancee
You don't want the second e but the first one needs a thing over it like the one below.

é


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New POD

3,851 posts

36 months

[news] 
Thursday 15th August 2013 quote quote all
Carthage said:
Why does everything have to be gendered?
Are you female ? I'm sure that us blokes are pretty thick when it comes to washing and ironing....for instance, I NEVER separate the colours from the whites, or the hand wash from the towels.

And if it won't iron on III it won't iron at all.

Same as my wife telling me a) she ignores all warning lights in the car, and b) it's NOT a woman's job to take a slow puncture to a tyre place 300 yrds away and get it looked at.

Because those are jobs for a bloke.

rohrl

5,325 posts

31 months

[news] 
Thursday 15th August 2013 quote quote all
Kiltie said:
You don't want the second e but the first one needs a thing over it like the one below.

é
Fiancé is masculine, fiancée is feminine.

Speed addicted

2,110 posts

113 months

[news] 
Thursday 15th August 2013 quote quote all
My wife and her sister are completely incapable of understanding the gears on mountain bikes. I've explained the theory, I've showed them and they still just don't get it.
I now shout which digit to use to get easier or harder gears.

Hooli

28,114 posts

86 months

[news] 
Thursday 15th August 2013 quote quote all
24lemons said:
While attempting for the umpteenth time to reverse into the parking space with a car one side and a pillar the other, I suggested to my gf that it would be easier if she just drove straight into the vacant spot directly ahead. Her response? "No it wont because ill just have to reverse out of it".

While technically correct, the manoeuvre would have merely consisted of reversing into the traffic lane of the car park and not into a narrow spot, I opted to keep quiet as it wasnt worth arguing.
Nothing more annoying than having to reverse out into traffic when you can't see, so she's correct.



PS. I HATE the morons in councils who insist on those angled spaces you can only drive into & have to reverse out into the traffic. They are designed to annoy everyone.

loafer123

3,268 posts

101 months

[news] 
Thursday 15th August 2013 quote quote all
kev b said:
My rolleyes action is where a woman whacks the temperature control up to maximum thinking it will warm up the car/house/cooker more quickly.

The look of uncomprehending contempt they give you when you try to explain is pretty dispiriting as well.
This drives me mad.

As you say, it is the fact they think they are right that makes it particularly annoying.

Hooli

28,114 posts

86 months

[news] 
Thursday 15th August 2013 quote quote all
loafer123 said:
kev b said:
My rolleyes action is where a woman whacks the temperature control up to maximum thinking it will warm up the car/house/cooker more quickly.

The look of uncomprehending contempt they give you when you try to explain is pretty dispiriting as well.
This drives me mad.

As you say, it is the fact they think they are right that makes it particularly annoying.
Don't forget that they then open all the windows because it's stuffy, but your not allowed to turn the heating down because it's cold...

Carthage

4,015 posts

30 months

[news] 
Thursday 15th August 2013 quote quote all
New POD said:
Are you female ? I'm sure that us blokes are pretty thick when it comes to washing and ironing....for instance, I NEVER separate the colours from the whites, or the hand wash from the towels.

And if it won't iron on III it won't iron at all.

Same as my wife telling me a) she ignores all warning lights in the car, and b) it's NOT a woman's job to take a slow puncture to a tyre place 300 yrds away and get it looked at.

Because those are jobs for a bloke.
I am roughly female (emphasis on 'rough'). wink
All men should know how to wash their own clothes, and all women should know how to change a puncture/not drive on through warning lights.
And both genders should be able to park in a car port without hitting my wheely bin. Just sayin'. wavey

Pesty

30,664 posts

142 months

[news] 
Thursday 15th August 2013 quote quote all
Carthage said:
I am roughly female (emphasis on 'rough'). wink
All men should know how to wash their own clothes, and all women should know how to change a puncture/not drive on through warning lights.
And both genders should be able to park in a car port without hitting my wheely bin. Just sayin'. wavey
I know how to was clothes you shove it all in and press start.

It's the lack of understanding or being able to work anything that does my head in.

Something happened today at work well it does every day but let's not get into that I won't be popular. There is not a day goes by where I am bemused by their lack of understanding for anything mechanical.


I bought a new upright vacuum cleaner as the other died if you want to use the pipe you pull it and use for stairs etc.

I watched all 3 females in my house pull at the pipe trying to remove it. They were pulling at ge end where the motor was not where the vacuum head is. Do they think the vacuum is generated on the floor?,any man would have instantly understood what to do. I just don't think they think at all or try and understand how these things work

But I can't butter toast so I can't moan really


Edited by Pesty on Thursday 15th August 21:51

Carthage

4,015 posts

30 months

[news] 
Thursday 15th August 2013 quote quote all
Pesty said:
I know how to was clothes you shove it all in and press start.

It's the lack of understanding or being able to work anything that does my head in.

Something happened today at work well it does every dy but let's not get into that I won't be popular. There is not a day goes by where I am bemused by their lack of understanding for anything mechanical.


At I bought a new upright vacuum cleaner as the other died if you want to use the pipe you pull it nd use for stairs etc.

I watched all 3 females in my house pull at the pipe trying to remove it. They were pulling at ge end where the motor was not where the vacuum head is. Do they think the vacuum is generated on the floor?,any man would have instantly understood what to do. I just don't think they think at all or try and understand how these things work

But I can't butter toast so I can't moan really
I can use vacuum cleaners. And keyboards. And iPads. And use spellcheck. I'm special.

Pesty

30,664 posts

142 months

[news] 
Thursday 15th August 2013 quote quote all
Yeah I'm st at typing and spelling.


I admit my faults. If only women would too. Ime they tend not to.

If you can change a car wheel I'm impressed. Mine can't even blow a tyre up despite me showing her countless times.

She's scared of it. Thinks it will blow up in her face.


Edited by Pesty on Thursday 15th August 21:56

Cliftonite

3,222 posts

24 months

[news] 
Thursday 15th August 2013 quote quote all
Carthage said:
I am roughly female (emphasis on 'rough'). wink
All men should know how to wash their own clothes, and all women should know how to change a puncture/not drive on through warning lights.
And both genders should be able to park in a car port without hitting my wheely bin. Just sayin'. wavey
They are not genders, they are sexes.

teacher


chockymonster

541 posts

96 months

[news] 
Thursday 15th August 2013 quote quote all
Hooli said:
24lemons said:
While attempting for the umpteenth time to reverse into the parking space with a car one side and a pillar the other, I suggested to my gf that it would be easier if she just drove straight into the vacant spot directly ahead. Her response? "No it wont because ill just have to reverse out of it".

While technically correct, the manoeuvre would have merely consisted of reversing into the traffic lane of the car park and not into a narrow spot, I opted to keep quiet as it wasnt worth arguing.
Nothing more annoying than having to reverse out into traffic when you can't see, so she's correct.



PS. I HATE the morons in councils who insist on those angled spaces you can only drive into & have to reverse out into the traffic. They are designed to annoy everyone.
H&S at work have a fit if anyone parks nose in to a parking space. Reverse in, that way you can see who you're running over when you leave in the evening

0000

11,151 posts

77 months

[news] 
Thursday 15th August 2013 quote quote all
P-Jay said:
Sharp at a tack, my Wife
So's mine, my dragon style defence is pretty awesome though.

New POD

3,851 posts

36 months

[news] 
Thursday 15th August 2013 quote quote all
Pesty said:
Yeah I'm st at typing and spelling.


I admit my faults. If only women would too. Ime they tend not to.

If you can change a car wheel I'm impressed. Mine can't even blow a tyre up despite me showing her countless times.

She's scared of it. Thinks it will blow up in her face.


Edited by Pesty on Thursday 15th August 21:56
I KNOW that my wife pretends to know fk all about anything she considers is my role, but then expects me to know everything about everything.

How was I to know that adding fresh herbs like rosemary and sage to a chilli was not allowed by some unwritten law. I liked what it tasted like, it was edible, and tasty, so what is the problem. And I cooked enough for 2 further days.

Ray Luxury-Yacht

8,139 posts

102 months

[news] 
Thursday 15th August 2013 quote quote all
Well, one of my ex's was with me one day when we went to a barbecue at a mate's house that she hadn't been to before.

Upon entering the garden, she said to the host 'ooh, your bird table is a bit high isn't it?'

To which he obviously replied with a poker face 'yeah, it's ok though, they can fly...'



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