Boy Racers/Car modifiers....Why????

Boy Racers/Car modifiers....Why????

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Streetcop

Original Poster:

5,907 posts

237 months

Wednesday 2nd March 2005
quotequote all
EXHAUST - Often complementing the boy racer's already impressive bass power is his exhaust system. These can range from the bog-standard "exhaust pipe" (an overpriced bit of metal to attach over the exhaust to make the car sound like an angry bee in a tin can rather than just an angry bee) to the top-of-the-range "sports exhaust" (an overpriced bit of metal to replace their car's existing exhaust and make the car sound like a HGV and give the boy racer endless opportunities to claim his car is a racing car).

SUNSTRIP - If you are a fan of rally driving you will notice that many professional rally cars have these "sun strips" to protect the racer from the sun and advertise the racing team name / sponsor on the car. Boy racers, keen to emulate their far more talented idols, also stick these "sun strips" on their cars. Typically just plastic strips these are the ideal first mod for the aspiring boy racer as they are not difficult to fit (well, not difficult to fit badly) and very very cheap. Unlike most of the other mods...

ALLOY WHEELS - These are purely to make the car "look better". Most boy racer cars need all the help they can get in this department, so boy racers are willing to spend amazing amounts of cash on their alloy wheels. Models range from the cheap plastic (incidently, not technically "alloys") "fake and untrendy" ones (which will no doubt cause the aspiring boy racer to get laughed at) at around £30 each to the hyper expensive "£1000+ a set" proper alloy-metal models (which will no doubt cause the aspiring boy racer to be the victim of an easy theft). Purchasers must be careful to buy the right types of alloys however, because the three spoke ones are untrendy (for reasons unknown) and generally the more of your brake disc you can see (i.e. the smaller the actual alloy) the more fashionable the alloy wheel is.

UPRATED BRAKES - The reason that smaller alloys are more fashionable is because they show off more of the boy racer's braking system. These may be expensive "performance" parts designed for more powerful cars, but it will not be that rare a sight to see the alloy merely revealing the boy racer's bog standard drum brakes. Most people agree that better brakes are a Good Thing for boy racers to have.

LOWERED CARS - "Lowering" your car is when you take out the existing suspension springs and replace them for shorter suspension springs, meaning your car is lower off the ground and (in theory) more manoeuvrable (for those idiotic high speed car chases most boy racers indulge in). However one major flaw overlooked by boy racers, who often lower their cars until they are mere inches off the ground, is that the average speed bump, hill or unevenly surfaced road can result in the bottom of their car scraping the ground and can cause considerable damage to the exhaust.

BODY KIT - Some boy racers also spend a fortune on plastic moulded panels to stick to the side of their car in an attempt to make it look better, or often to make it look like a better car than it is (for example a Ford Cosworth, rather than a standard Ford Escort XR3). These "body kits" contain front and rear bumpers, "side skirts" and occasionaly other things distinctive of the car the boy racer is attempting to emulate. The major part of the body kit is the bumpers, which are described in greater detail next;

BUMPERS - Boy racers love having large, garish bumpers on their cars, which make the car look lower than it is. This, they feel, is a good thing. So you will often see boy racers with huge plastic front bumpers like snowploughs attached to their cars. Some boy racers even attempt to make these things themselves, resulting in the boy racer's car looking like it barely survived a collision with half a plastic bathtub (which is what the offending bumper probably started life as). Boy racers also tend to forget that bumpers are primarily designed to protect the car from minor impacts and so the bumper designs are more for show than for safety, cracking under the slightest pressure, and causing the boy racer to find it even more difficult to negotiate speed bumps.

DEBADGING - It is not much good to the boy racer if their car looks like a Cossie but still has the telltale XR3 badges on the back. To make sure everyone knows the boy racer's car is "pukka" many will remove all of the badges from the rear of the car, or replace them with badges for the car they wished they had.

CLEAR INDICATORS - Boy racers are renowned for their complete failure to appreciate the finer points (and often even the essential points) of design, and clear indicators are one such example. No doubt inspired by one person modding his white car with clear indicators, most boy racers have followed suit (in the traditional manner of boy racers to follow trends rather than actually think about their designs) and replaced their traditional yellow-tinted indicators with clear ones.

"SPOTLIGHTS" (FOGLIGHTS) - Boy racers often take their inspirations from rally cars, and these often have several spotlights on the front which help the driver see the road better at night. However as usual many boy racers feel that modifications designed for rally driving would look good and be useful on a standard road car, and this is one of the more common modifications. Unfortunately for the boy racer the police have a dim view of these "spotlights" (which are better known to the law as "foglights", and have laws surrounding their use - even though many non-standard "spotlights" are not intended or wired as foglights at all) when they are used regardless of weather conditions. Also installation of these additional foglights often will ruin the boy racer's bumper.

WIDE TIRES - Designed primarily to give greater stability while cornering, these also have the unfortunate result of giving the boy racer's car the appearance of a badly modded 80's dragster due to the extra surface area of the tyres.

TIRE PAINT - Having noticed that some race car teams paint in the names of the manufacturers of their tyres, some boy racers did the same thing. The result is hilarious, especially if the boy racer has purchased a "budget" brand of tyre.

BIGGER WHEELS - Boy racers are obsessed with the size of their wheels (often noted by impartial observers to be suspiciously Freudian) and the bigger the wheel radius the more impressed fellow boy racers are with the car. Often drastic modifications need to be done to the wheel arches to accommodate the bigger wheels, so this mod is not recommended for novices. 18" wheels are an acceptably large size, especially on smaller cars where the extensive engineering work required to fit them is greatly admired. Aspiring boy racers must however be very careful to make sure that their modifications to their vehicle's wheel arches does not render the car illegal - it is easily done.

BETTER AIR FILTERS / CARBURETTORS - If the boy racer's engine uses a carburettor, improved air filters and carburettors can be fitted to "improve performance" of the car. Such improvements often cost a small fortune and result in a minimal performance gain of a few BHP, but the prestige of having an air filter manufactured by certain brands is very great for a boy racer and often worth every penny. It is also not unheard of for boy racers to fit parts from other, better, cars to make their car appear cooler - turbo intercoolers being the obvious choice.

SPOILERS - Boy racers often attach ridiculously large "spoilers" onto the back of their cars in the mistaken belief that a) it makes it look better and b) will actually make people believe their car can go fast enough that it will be in danger of taking off. Perhaps small understated spoilers would be okay but most boy racers believe in the concept of "the bigger the better" and so their spoilers invariably look like spare parts for Cessna jets.

TINTED WINDOWS - Boy racers like to pretend they are more important than they really are and so try to copy the star's limosines by tinting the windows. However since tinted front and rear windscreens are illegal in the UK most boy racers just tint the side ones, which seems rather pointless to me. On the plus side, tinted windows can protect the outside world from the boy racer's appearance and any antics the boy racer might be getting up to inside the car.

BIGGER ENGINE SIZES - It is a well known fact in boy racing circles that "the bigger the car the bigger the dick". The 1.2 litre engine in the standard car the boy racer plans to "improve" is invariably not powerful enough, despite being the only thing they'll get insured on for a reasonable premium, and so larger engines often with turbos are fitted sending the boy racer's insurance premium through the roof but making him the envy of his peers.

DUMP VALVES - I really had to include these. You know the whoosing noises lorries sometimes make when stopped at traffic lights due to their air brakes? Well some boy racer's fit devices that make similar noises onto their cars, little aware that it makes them the laughing stock of the general population. It is quite amusing seeing a whacked out car zoom by making a little whooshing sound as the driver changes gear - a bit like seeing a cat roar like a lion I guess Many of these noise-producing devices are proper dump valves for cars with turbos, designed to reduce pressure on the engine. However some are just basically speakers with a prerecorded whoosh noise. We kid you not.

WASHER JET NEONS - These little things attach to the boy racer's washer jets, and are commonly available in any colour as long as it's a bright garish blue. Consequentially they are completely illegal in the UK resulting in boy racers often fitting switches to turn them on and off at will (much like any other illegal "mod"). They also look somewhat naff, merely serving the purpose of proving they have washer jets. Oooh, lucky them.

UNDER-CAR NEONS - Some boy racers go a step further than the "neons in the boot next to the sub" approach and fit neon lights underneath the car. Boy racers have the mistaken impression that this makes their car look cool, giving it a surreal "floaty" appearance, but in reality the only purpose of this mod would be to perhaps allow mechanics to look underneath the car easier at night when it's broken down on the hard shoulder of the M4.

DE-LOCKING - Some Boy Racers feel their cars should look "smoother" so remove all of the locks from their car doors. They also claim this makes their car more secure, as there are no locks for scally kids to remove with a screwdriver to get at the stereo. However its a bit of a blob if the batteries have run out on the Boy Racer's remote, and who's to say the kids won't just use the screwdriver on the window in combination with a brick?

FLAMER KITS - Don't ask us what the point of these are. They can be fitted to exhausts, and ignite excess fuel escaping through the exhaust, making a nice pretty flame. Very Mad Max. Our instincts tell us to be wary of these, in the same way that you would be wary of any scally with a can of petrol and a lighter.

"CUSTOM FONT" PLATES - These were introduced in the UK a while ago but became illegal soon afterwards as it was realised they're often harder to read than the standard ones. However some Boy Racers use them anyway, usually choosing the most illegible and naff fonts they can find. Some of the richer boy racers can also buy custom numberplates, although it only really serves to make the general public wonder why the boy racer bothered putting such a unique plate on such a cheap nasty car.

"BAD BOY" BONNETS - Some boy racers love modifying their bonnets. As well as the tacky, pointless bonnet vents that they adore, they can cut the front of their bonnets in such a way that the bonnet is slanted over the headlights - kinda like a frowning cartoon car in a children's TV programme - and this technique is known as "Bad Boying" the bonnet. Presumably these boy racers like their cars to look like a character from a children's TV series, although we really couldn't tell you why.

BONNET VENTS - Bonnet vents on rally cars are designed to increase air flow to the engine, to cool it. Naturally 99.9% of boy racer cars aren't rally cars and if driven properly shouldn't need additional cooling, but some boy racers add these vents into their bonnets anyway. This, as far as we can tell, is done either with the mistaken impression that it makes their car look good, to compensate for their inability to drive sensibly, or to cater for the stupid "performance" engine they've put in to help validate the insurance.

WIRE MESH RADIATOR GRILLS - As with bonnet vents, radiator grills are designed to increase air flow to the engine and cool it down. However boy racers tend to shun standard and perfectly functional radiator grills for "wire mesh" versions. The similarities of this mesh to chicken wire can often have the unfortunate effect of making this modification make the car look like a chicken hutch, especially if the boy racer uses too much wire.

^Slider^

2,874 posts

248 months

Wednesday 2nd March 2005
quotequote all
WASHER JET NEONS - These little things attach to the boy racer's washer jets, and are commonly available in any colour as long as it's a bright garish blue. Consequentially they are completely illegal in the UK resulting in boy racers often fitting switches to turn them on and off at will (much like any other illegal "mod"). They also look somewhat naff, merely serving the purpose of proving they have washer jets. Oooh, lucky them

Wasnt aware they were illigal. What offence?? Blue light to the front or energence warning beacon?

parrot of doom

23,075 posts

233 months

Wednesday 2nd March 2005
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You forgot:

THE DRIVER - A tw@

>> Edited by parrot of doom on Wednesday 2nd March 18:14

Streetcop

Original Poster:

5,907 posts

237 months

Wednesday 2nd March 2005
quotequote all
^Slider^ said:
WASHER JET NEONS - These little things attach to the boy racer's washer jets, and are commonly available in any colour as long as it's a bright garish blue. Consequentially they are completely illegal in the UK resulting in boy racers often fitting switches to turn them on and off at will (much like any other illegal "mod"). They also look somewhat naff, merely serving the purpose of proving they have washer jets. Oooh, lucky them

Wasnt aware they were illigal. What offence?? Blue light to the front or energence warning beacon?


Case law pending really....

Some are prosecuted for 'optional lights not complying with regulations'...ie: white/amber to front.

Also 'obligatory lights not complying with regulations'...ie: position lights not white/amber.

If they flash of course it the misuse of emergency beacon..

Personally, i've stopped issuing tickets...as the law is too vague regarding them...so i've put it on the back burner...

Now as for front fog lights in clear conditions....ticket every time...
"Driving lights", "foggy yesterday", "must have knocked 'em on with my knee", "didn't know"....bollox...

Streetcop

Original Poster:

5,907 posts

237 months

Wednesday 2nd March 2005
quotequote all

boredpilot

478 posts

237 months

Wednesday 2nd March 2005
quotequote all
Hmm I must go under the catagory of car modifer.

Take one standard MG midget.

Remove crappy gear box and replace with 5 spd
Take Crappy rear suspension and change with Spax
Take the static fan and bin it and fit one kenlow
Take on MG Metro turbo and fit to bog standard 1098 engine and fit new exhaust for the turbo.
Fit brake survo
Convert to -ve earth
Convert to Alternator
Change glow worms to halegon head lamps
Take 145 tyres and change to 155
K&N Airfilter

Does that make me a rude boy? I hope not, also note that all the mods cannot be seen unless you go under the car. Even the turbo conversion I made a custom plenum chamber so the bonnet wouldnt have a bit airscoop/buldge

EDIT forgot to say I dont do drive thu's and hate to have my car too close to chavs as they have no idea how to do anything them selfs eg, gear knob what will they do but chop the old one off and glue a new one on as they dont know how to remove old one

>> Edited by boredpilot on Wednesday 2nd March 18:27

>> Edited by boredpilot on Wednesday 2nd March 18:41

deeps

5,391 posts

240 months

Wednesday 2nd March 2005
quotequote all
What a load of sarcastic rubbish obviously written by a boring car hater.
Some boy racer cars are hilarious and OTT I agree, but on the whole I say fair play to 'em for having an interest that doesn't harm anyone and having the skill, devotion and pride to do it.
I much prefer seeing cared for modded cars on the road than boring Reps cars everywhere!



>> Edited by deeps on Wednesday 2nd March 18:41

JoolzB

3,549 posts

248 months

Wednesday 2nd March 2005
quotequote all
Streetcop said:
SPOILERS - Boy racers often attach ridiculously large "spoilers" onto the back of their cars in the mistaken belief that a) it makes it look better and b) will actually make people believe their car can go fast enough that it will be in danger of taking off. Perhaps small understated spoilers would be okay but most boy racers believe in the concept of "the bigger the better" and so their spoilers invariably look like spare parts for Cessna jets.


Once knew a Joe-tina driver who'd made one himself from wood and hand painted it, very nice an all.

Can't believe how much some of these chaps spend on their motors to make them look sh@ and probably un-sellable and probly making the performance worse in the mean time.

>> Edited by JoolzB on Wednesday 2nd March 18:48

deeen

6,079 posts

244 months

Wednesday 2nd March 2005
quotequote all
Oh dear.

My current car has an "improved" exhaust, alloys, I've lowered it, has wide tyres, K+N filter, no external handles/locks, and bonnet vents.

7 / 26, did I get away with it?

birdbrain

1,564 posts

238 months

Wednesday 2nd March 2005
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I'm not sure why they do it but when I was about 18 I always used to want a max power'd car because I thought it would look cool and also because it was all blokes that drove those cars...

But I've grown up a bit since then.

DeltaFox

3,839 posts

231 months

Wednesday 2nd March 2005
quotequote all
Guess i must be a modifier/racer too then.

Take one late 70's Golf mark 1.
Add 2 tablespoons of "turbo" and a half cup of "H" section rods.
Stir vigorously while mixing in a custom intercooler and allow to stand for 10 minutes.
In a separate bowl, break 4 quattro pistons from their box and lightly coat with melted ceramic.
Into another bowl, sprinkle lightly 8 specially modified valves, a steel head gasket, various ARP bolts and studs, and 5 litres of Castrol GTX.
Stir this bowl for 20 minutes until the mixture is fully coated.

Heat an oven to gas mark4 and on the bottom shelf insert a modified G60 Corrado gearbox and quaife differential, and allow to cook for 2 hours until firm with a brown crispy coating, then allow to cool and garnish with a cable change mechanism.

Mix the bowls of intercooler and turbo until a consistency of Dough is acheived before baking for 3 hours at gas mark 5.

Remove from the oven when the mass has solidified and sprinkle on silicone hoses, and huge brakes.
Add a rollcage, harnesses and kevlar/carbon seats to taste.
Extra seasoning in the form of Yokohama tyres may be added at any time and to your own preferences or a stainless home built "zorst" can also be used.




We aint all "boy racers" or "charvers" without a clue Street.....Ps if you want your S60 Plodder tastefully modifiying, drop me a line...

Pies

13,116 posts

255 months

Wednesday 2nd March 2005
quotequote all
A.Because they can
B.Because they want to
C.Insurance wont let them have more power

Each to their own

gtr-gaz

5,090 posts

245 months

Wednesday 2nd March 2005
quotequote all
Streetcop said:

^Slider^ said:
WASHER JET NEONS - These little things attach to the boy racer's washer jets, and are commonly available in any colour as long as it's a bright garish blue. Consequentially they are completely illegal in the UK resulting in boy racers often fitting switches to turn them on and off at will (much like any other illegal "mod"). They also look somewhat naff, merely serving the purpose of proving they have washer jets. Oooh, lucky them

Wasnt aware they were illigal. What offence?? Blue light to the front or energence warning beacon?



Case law pending really....

Some are prosecuted for 'optional lights not complying with regulations'...ie: white/amber to front.

Also 'obligatory lights not complying with regulations'...ie: position lights not white/amber.

If they flash of course it the misuse of emergency beacon..

Personally, i've stopped issuing tickets...as the law is too vague regarding them...so i've put it on the back burner...

Now as for front fog lights in clear conditions....ticket every time...
"Driving lights", "foggy yesterday", "must have knocked 'em on with my knee", "didn't know"....bollox...



What a complete waste of police resources.

Prosecuting for neon lights. How petty can you get!

catso

14,771 posts

266 months

Wednesday 2nd March 2005
quotequote all
Was in a newsagents today and some magazine (can't remember which) had got a 'Free' set of Blue Neon washer jets on the cover, so expect to see many more about.

MoJocvh

16,837 posts

261 months

Wednesday 2nd March 2005
quotequote all
And why not?

Still no doubt the some police chief's will convince the home office there is a bit of brass to be had if a new law or two is introduced or the present laws "tightened up". Again.

Mojo.

jolley

465 posts

234 months

Wednesday 2nd March 2005
quotequote all
Pies said:

C.Insurance wont let them have more power



But their insurance will go up with the cosmetic/wheel/spring/brake changes anyway. I have often found that it is cheaper to insure a car that is fast in the first place than to make a slower one faster/better looking.

However, do you actually believe that they all tell their insurers?! ... I am surprised that insurance companies have not started going to cruises to catch some of them out.

towman

14,938 posts

238 months

Wednesday 2nd March 2005
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What an absolute load of tosh. Where did you dig it up from Gary?

Put me down for all of that in 1978. Obviously we didn`t have dump valves and neons, but if they had been available I would hav bolted them to my Mini.

Incidently, what are the wheels made of on your company car?

jolley

465 posts

234 months

Wednesday 2nd March 2005
quotequote all
^Slider^ said:
WASHER JET NEONS - These little things attach to the boy racer's washer jets, and are commonly available in any colour as long as it's a bright garish blue. Consequentially they are completely illegal in the UK resulting in boy racers often fitting switches to turn them on and off at will (much like any other illegal "mod"). They also look somewhat naff, merely serving the purpose of proving they have washer jets. Oooh, lucky them

Wasnt aware they were illigal. What offence?? Blue light to the front or energence warning beacon?


Does anyone know the origin of these anyway? .... I am sure that I used to see them on lorry cabs well before they started to appear on cars.

tim.tonal

2,049 posts

232 months

Wednesday 2nd March 2005
quotequote all
Aye, you do see some trucks done up like christmas trees!
Are these driven by grown-up boy racers?

lanciachris

3,357 posts

240 months

Wednesday 2nd March 2005
quotequote all
Alfa sprint - K&N air filters
Lowered
Full length stainless exhaust system

Rust - present.

Personally id say the previous owner was nuts to spend the money on the exhaust over fixing the rust, but hey, I cant say I disapprove of any of these modifications.

Oh, clarification is requested on the front lights thing - what is the difference between spotlights and foglights from the laws perspective? spots wired into main beam I suppose?