Discussion
Sorry for the O/T post
For the 2nd time in the last year I have heard of a NO CHILDREN wedding.
Wedding 1. My Mrss cousin got wed last sept they said NO KIDS we were unable to attend as there was no one available to have our kids all day and all night.
Wedding 2. Good friends of my parents (my mum is doing the wedding) have also said NO KIDS.
In the first wedding a child aged 2 was a bridesmaid but no other kids were able to attend.
In the second wedding the designated bridesmaid refused to carry out the duty because her daughter was unable to attend.
Now this really annoys me. How would the bride/groom feel if the shoe was on the other foot. A wedding is a family occasion. Any respectable parent will take full responsibility for thier kids, there is NO reason why they should spoil the day.
For the 2nd time in the last year I have heard of a NO CHILDREN wedding.
Wedding 1. My Mrss cousin got wed last sept they said NO KIDS we were unable to attend as there was no one available to have our kids all day and all night.
Wedding 2. Good friends of my parents (my mum is doing the wedding) have also said NO KIDS.
In the first wedding a child aged 2 was a bridesmaid but no other kids were able to attend.
In the second wedding the designated bridesmaid refused to carry out the duty because her daughter was unable to attend.
Now this really annoys me. How would the bride/groom feel if the shoe was on the other foot. A wedding is a family occasion. Any respectable parent will take full responsibility for thier kids, there is NO reason why they should spoil the day.
Well I am getting married next year and I am stipulating no kids. It is unfortunate for those who do have well behaved kids to be penalised but I would rather that than have my wedding and the enjoyment of other guests ruined by kids running riot, being noisy and generally making a nuisance. I know one day I will be in the position of having kids and the same being said to me, but fairs fair, weddings are far too expensive nowadays to be ruined by kids.
I see your point Ted but, in the case of the second wedding the bride has known her bridesmaid for over 20 years there is no way this child would spoil a wedding as the dad and g/parents would also be in attendance. For the first my mrs was upset as both my kids (and others) attended his sisters wedding the year before with no problems at all.
We had a no-kids wedding - and don't regret it.
no kids crying or screaming at in-oportune moments during the service or reception and then no kids crying becuse they were tiredshowing offwanted to go home etc later on. It did mean that some relatives said they could not come - but we gave them plenty of warning so they could have found a babysitter if they really wanted to come.
I suppose it depends on how children friendly you are, and how good friends & relatives are with their kids - there are too many "disadvantaged" (read disobediant brats that need a good slap) kids in my family to even consider them, and we felt that if we say no to one we say no to them all.
no kids crying or screaming at in-oportune moments during the service or reception and then no kids crying becuse they were tiredshowing offwanted to go home etc later on. It did mean that some relatives said they could not come - but we gave them plenty of warning so they could have found a babysitter if they really wanted to come.
I suppose it depends on how children friendly you are, and how good friends & relatives are with their kids - there are too many "disadvantaged" (read disobediant brats that need a good slap) kids in my family to even consider them, and we felt that if we say no to one we say no to them all.
It is unfortunate as I have said that parents with well behaved kids are getting penalised for those people who do let their kids do as they please. But at the end of the day, it is the bride and grooms day, they have planned it for months and spent an awful lot of money on it, it is their right to decide who they want at the wedding.
Bodo said:
mrs.fish, get a baby sitter or two for the wedding; that'll surely release the parents and gets the kids looked after
Nah, it is going to be a kid free zone. If I had kids I wouldn't take them to a wedding anyway as they would get in the way of me fully enjoying myself. If I wanted to go to a wedding badly enough I would find someone to look after them, or else just not go.
fcuk them mate!,they knew yourself and others attending had kids and still insisted on having a no kids wedding knowing you and others might not be able to get a babysitter probably to cut costs.
never mind,you want to goto the reception,ply yourself and everybody else with drink (only till the 'free bar' is over) and get outside to their car and cover it in a concotion of shaving foam and non-bio washing up liquid,tie beercans on the underside as well as the rear bumper,tie the whole car up in toilet paper and garnish with a cherry.
also,write something nice on the rear like 'finally getting that blow-job' or 'now ive married her she has to take it up the bum'
only a thought.
never mind,you want to goto the reception,ply yourself and everybody else with drink (only till the 'free bar' is over) and get outside to their car and cover it in a concotion of shaving foam and non-bio washing up liquid,tie beercans on the underside as well as the rear bumper,tie the whole car up in toilet paper and garnish with a cherry.
also,write something nice on the rear like 'finally getting that blow-job' or 'now ive married her she has to take it up the bum'
only a thought.
mrs fish said:
But at the end of the day, it is the bride and grooms day, they have planned it for months and spent an awful lot of money on it, it is their right to decide who they want at the wedding.
Hmmmmmm, (scribbles furiously) must remember that I have no financial obligation when my daughter takes the plunge... Just joking Mrs Fish...
ErnestM
Depends how you see your wedding. I think it's a solemn occasion where you make a commitment to someone else for the rest of your life. The people who come are there to witness your commitment.
I wouldn't want squawking kids there. Specially the sort with indulgent parents who think it's cute that their little Wayne is giving it full throttle whilst the couple are saying their vows.
I wouldn't want squawking kids there. Specially the sort with indulgent parents who think it's cute that their little Wayne is giving it full throttle whilst the couple are saying their vows.
Wedding's are a huge expense that appears wholly unjustified to me ... I have been to a couple of weedings this year that did not appear to cost a fortune and where the 2 best I had attended ..
I do agree with the commitments made, and this is not a comment on marriage, just the farsical amount of money people spend "keeping up with the Jones's" so their wedding is even more special than the last one they went to.
As for the 'no kids' ruling ... I agree Ted, there are 2 sides. But I would not deprive any of my families kids from attending my wedding, should I ever be involved in one.
I was at a fantastic wedding in Suffolk earlier this summer where there were quite a few babies/kids etc and their parents made sure their presence wasn't intrusive, but a wedding wouldn't be a wedding without some involvement of children. Is this not a way of introducing them to the idea of it !
In our increasingly sanitized and formula lifestyles this is just another sad reflection of image over content.
I actually am struggling to believe anyone would sanction their friends and family to not bring their children to an event which should be a celebration of their relationship and a demonstration of their commitment.
Is this the relationship equivalent of F1 ...... Marriage ceremonies ruined by too much money being involved ?
I do agree with the commitments made, and this is not a comment on marriage, just the farsical amount of money people spend "keeping up with the Jones's" so their wedding is even more special than the last one they went to.
As for the 'no kids' ruling ... I agree Ted, there are 2 sides. But I would not deprive any of my families kids from attending my wedding, should I ever be involved in one.
I was at a fantastic wedding in Suffolk earlier this summer where there were quite a few babies/kids etc and their parents made sure their presence wasn't intrusive, but a wedding wouldn't be a wedding without some involvement of children. Is this not a way of introducing them to the idea of it !
In our increasingly sanitized and formula lifestyles this is just another sad reflection of image over content.
I actually am struggling to believe anyone would sanction their friends and family to not bring their children to an event which should be a celebration of their relationship and a demonstration of their commitment.
Is this the relationship equivalent of F1 ...... Marriage ceremonies ruined by too much money being involved ?
mrs fish said:
Bodo said:
mrs.fish, get a baby sitter or two for the wedding; that'll surely release the parents and gets the kids looked after
Nah, it is going to be a kid free zone. If I had kids I wouldn't take them to a wedding anyway as they would get in the way of me fully enjoying myself. If I wanted to go to a wedding badly enough I would find someone to look after them, or else just not go.
No offence Mrs Fish but when you have kids of your own you will realise that your kids are part of your family and if they are not invited to a family do then perhaps you may see my point.
Edited to agree with johno
>> Edited by zetec on Monday 28th July 21:52
Cortinaman - Are you married or even thinking about it?
If not wait until you have sampled a few more of these wedding where kids are complete pains in the arse, or you have spent 10+ grand on a wedding only to have it marred by noisy kids running around and screaming. I don't care how well behaved people think their kids are, but I doubt there are many that remain so well behaved after having to sit quiet and still through a church ceremony and spend hours in a party atmosphere where the adults are slowly getting drunk, are tired by 8.00pm and want to go to bed, or want something they are told 'no' to, they will not take it quietly I assure you.
Edited to add, I know no one is ever going to agree on this debate, I also know I feel strongly enough about the no kids rule that it will not change when I do have kids of my own.
>> Edited by mrs fish (moderator) on Monday 28th July 21:56
If not wait until you have sampled a few more of these wedding where kids are complete pains in the arse, or you have spent 10+ grand on a wedding only to have it marred by noisy kids running around and screaming. I don't care how well behaved people think their kids are, but I doubt there are many that remain so well behaved after having to sit quiet and still through a church ceremony and spend hours in a party atmosphere where the adults are slowly getting drunk, are tired by 8.00pm and want to go to bed, or want something they are told 'no' to, they will not take it quietly I assure you.
Edited to add, I know no one is ever going to agree on this debate, I also know I feel strongly enough about the no kids rule that it will not change when I do have kids of my own.
>> Edited by mrs fish (moderator) on Monday 28th July 21:56
mrs fish said:
Cortinaman - Are you married or even thinking about it?
If not wait until you have sampled a few more of these wedding where kids are complete pains in the arse, or you have spent 10+ grand on a wedding only to have it marred by noisy kids running around and screaming. I don't care how well behaved people think their kids are, but I doubt there are many that remain so well behaved after having to sit quiet and still through a church ceremony and spend hours in a party atmosphere where the adults are slowly getting drunk, are tired by 8.00pm and want to go to bed, or want something they are told 'no' to, they will not take it quietly I assure you.
I am sure if invited to a wedding with my kids either me or my mrs will take full responsibility for our kids. Be it taking outside, discipline or early bed. The fact that there will always be 2 of us present allows my family to always be part of a celebration. Please do not judge all young kids as screaming brats.
We've had a wedding in our family that was a no kids one. That resulted in ructions.
The problem isn't the kids - it's the parents (some parents - I'm dismissing all parents). Some just don't know what level of noise is acceptable. Kids running about is great at a wedding and does make it a nice family occasion, but when someone is trying to make a speech or in the middle of the service, no level of crying is acceptable. Why don't some parents realise that.
Every wedding has different circumstances and people have friends and families with different numbers of children and of different ages. People should also respect that they are being invited to a celebration - it's not their right to be there.
The problem isn't the kids - it's the parents (some parents - I'm dismissing all parents). Some just don't know what level of noise is acceptable. Kids running about is great at a wedding and does make it a nice family occasion, but when someone is trying to make a speech or in the middle of the service, no level of crying is acceptable. Why don't some parents realise that.
Every wedding has different circumstances and people have friends and families with different numbers of children and of different ages. People should also respect that they are being invited to a celebration - it's not their right to be there.
mrs fish said:Owe up! You just want CarZee to visit your wedding, innit?
Nah, it is going to be a kid free zone. If I had kids I wouldn't take them to a wedding anyway as they would get in the way of me fully enjoying myself. If I wanted to go to a wedding badly enough I would find someone to look after them, or else just not go.
I never judged ALL kids as screaming brats. Maybe I have just been unfortunate in going to alot of weddings where at some point in the proceedings a child or children have been unruly. I commend you that you can look after your kids so that they don't be a nuisance, but unfortunately there are alot of people who don't.
At the end of the day it is my wedding, if I want kids I will, if not I won't.
At the end of the day it is my wedding, if I want kids I will, if not I won't.
mrs fish...yep,i am happily married and have been for the last 20 months.we had no restrictions placed on our wedding and the kids being there actually put some life into things instead of the usual booring speaches and such.we didnt spend 10k on the wedding as this is just rediculous for one day even if the consequences are (possibly) for life but we had the obligatory limo etc.the kids were taken home by their parents when the parents were ready (our wedding was at 2.30(by which time i was totally sh*tfaced) and most of the parents with kids left at around 10pm) and they were well behaved during the service.
i dont see the point of stopping friends and relatives from attending just because a child might cry during the service or a couple of kids might run around like loonies(as they do).btw,my brothers 6 kids,ranging from 1yr to 15yrs old who are usually noisy little fcukers were quiet as anything,which suprised everyone.
i dont see the point of stopping friends and relatives from attending just because a child might cry during the service or a couple of kids might run around like loonies(as they do).btw,my brothers 6 kids,ranging from 1yr to 15yrs old who are usually noisy little fcukers were quiet as anything,which suprised everyone.
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