That's because it's PHer Jon-'s new pride and joy, a bag-of-sand bargain that he bought almost by accident.
Initially the plan was to get 'the coolest car you can buy for £2000'. But while he fancied an old sharknose 6-series, he reckoned that he wouldn't be able to get in one he wanted for much less than £5k.
Then PHer Beefmeister pointed out a 635 CSi on ebay for £1800, which later dropped to £1400 with a year's MOT. "It looked a bit rotten from pictures, wasn't advertised at all well, but I emailed the guy and he claimed it was in great condition underneath," says Jon-. "I didn't bother to follow it up until he emailed me saying I could have it for £1000 if I'd come and collect it that week, so off I went to look at it." Made you an offer you couldn't refuse, from the sound of it, Jon-...
And a classic it is: 215bhp, 224lb ft and a 138mph top speed from that venerable 3.4-litre straight-six. But back to Jon-:
"During the long drive home (100 miles) I instantly regretted the purchase, scared I'd break down before I got home, then I had sleepless nights for the next few nights worried I'd just wasted £1000 on a skip. I didn't touch the car for the next few days but since then I've been getting to know her and have totally fallen for her charms.
"Anyway, the only thing I've done so far is a new set of wheels (£200) as one of the original wheels was buckled. They're a bit pimping but they'll do for now. I've also corrected the paintwork issues it had (with sand paper and a load of polishing) and the paint is now in great condition where it isn't rusty!"
There is also an ominous vibration from the gearbox, Jon- tells us, but that's a fine opportunity to swap out the three-speed-plus-overdrive auto for a manual gearbox, possibly while the top rot is sorted out and the car is sorn'd over the winter.
(Oh, and if you want to help Jon- fund his manual gearbox conversion, you could always visit his website - tyrereviews.co.uk...)