No wonder people download films illegally.

No wonder people download films illegally.

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g3org3y

Original Poster:

20,606 posts

190 months

Saturday 21st April 2012
quotequote all
fk the cinema. fk it up its fking overpriced full of rude s arse.

Just returned from the local Odeon in the sttest mood ever (QPR-Spurs result not helping).

Firstly, ticket prices. What the shuddering fk - £12.65 for a regular adult single. Add on an extra quid for the 3D glasses, multiply by two and you've near enough nailed £30 to watch a film. fking scandal. Cheap date it is not!

Popcorn and drink - £7.50 for a 'large combo'. To add further insult to already evident severe injury, smug coloured posters proclaim with combos you save 40p. Nice one. s.

Well, no matter. Expensive ticket, overpriced food perhaps the experience will be worth it?

Will it fk.

s talking all the way throughout. Some utter bellend of a woman brought an 8 year old to the film (t'was a 12) and let the little st chat constantly, on and on and on. Plenty of other adults talking however and barely an effort made to whisper.

By this point in time I'm getting chest pain from the rage and it isn't helped by the loudest rustlers of ever. What the are these fat fks eating that is louder than super duper Dolby Digital sound!? Not even a slight effort to keep it down a touch. IN addition, people constantly getting up and down, up and down, up and down. Sort your fking bladders/bowels/attitudes out.

Now I'm a reasonable chap (I promise). I also really enjoy watching films on the big screen - you know the whole big picture/sound experience. Occasionally, a little whispering may be fair and you do need to eat your popcorn, that's what happens in the cinema but today was a st storm of ludicrousness. I'm not a fan of the great unwashed at the best of times and this has not helped my lack of endearment. Utter fking rage and genuinely spoilt my enjoyment of the film.

Why the fk am I going to pay extortionate prices to sit next to s talking and eating with no consideration for anyone but their high BMI, socially retarded and frankly rude as fk selves?

fk you Odeon. And fk you film makers with your y 'you wouldn't steal a car' promo adverts to discourage illegal downloads.

From now on, I'll be streaming online buying the DVD and sitting slightly closer to the screen.

Tidybeard

539 posts

188 months

Saturday 21st April 2012
quotequote all
Sadly, everyone these days is a self-obsessed dhead and they don't care about social niceties, just doing whatever they want to do, whenever they want to do it.

8.5/10 for the rant, perhaps a little more variety in the profanity would push it up higher, but a solid effort.

What did you see?

Turn7

23,500 posts

220 months

Saturday 21st April 2012
quotequote all
Welcome to Camerons Big Society.....

Waynester

6,324 posts

249 months

Saturday 21st April 2012
quotequote all
Amen to that!

But you didn't get some asshole kicking the back of your seat, that's a plus?

I have almost quit the flicks, to expensive & just far to bloody irritating!

God I'm getting old.

tamore

6,781 posts

283 months

Saturday 21st April 2012
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Turn7 said:
Welcome to Camerons Big Society.....
Wot?

vladcjelli

2,962 posts

157 months

Saturday 21st April 2012
quotequote all
Big effects films only for me at the cinema nowadays. Preferably 15 certificate upwards.

Story based films can be enjoyed just as well, if not better at home. Big screen does enhance the Michael Bay effect type film (but obviously not Michael bay films themselves, which I think would require something stronger, and more pharmaceutical than popcorn).

15 and above at least lowers the chance of being sat behind a group of youths who have yet to discover the joys of personal hygiene.

In fact we only go to the pictures now to give our kids the chance to experience it without any idea of the cost, before it prices itself out of existence.

Hoofy

76,253 posts

281 months

Saturday 21st April 2012
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As some PHer said, cinemas are the entertainment version of public transport.

Ray Luxury-Yacht

8,910 posts

215 months

Saturday 21st April 2012
quotequote all
biggrin

I know. I used to love the movies, going near enough every week with a mate. Back then, maybe 5 years ago? It was a fiver or so.

The price seems to have gone up and up, and round here it's getting on for a tenner, or 12 quid if you want a 'luxury' seat.

The snacks have always been a ripoff, we knew that anyway.


Our cinema of choice started to ratchet the price up as I said, and the final straw was coming out to the car one night, in the complex's car park that I'd parked in for years before, to find a 'parking ticket' on the windscreen. The turds had employed one of these 'parking companies' since our last visit, but neglected to put up anything in the way of meaningful signs to say so. Upon closer inspection of the surroundings, there was one(!) piece of laminated A4 paper stuck to the outside wall of the cinema. No-one was gonna notice that! Anyway I didn't pay their 'ticket' and didn't hear anything further.

So we started using another cinema with free parking, elsewhere.




MY CINEMA GUIDE FOR PH'ER's:

Anyway OP - I've found a few things that redress the balance in your favour, that helps to counter all the things you've moaned about!

Go to the late night showings - and preferably on a Saturday - or better, Sunday night. Most people are out on the piss at 10:30pm on a Saturday, or don't want to go to a late show on Sunday because they have to get up for work. This way I find the screen is shared with maybe 10 or 20 other people at most, (and occasionally I've been the only punter in there!) and you can find somewhere to sit well away from others, and even better, if you sit nearer the front, most people tend to sit at the back. Hence, I often feel like I'm the only one in there anyway, as I can see nothing but empty seats all around - and it's much quieter.

Don't bother with Wednesday nights - 'Orange' Wednesdays mean it's packed, and your face will become 'Orange' with rage!

The other thing which helps to ensure an empty auditorium, is to wait until a film has been out for 2 or 3 weeks - especially if it's a big blockbuster type. Most people will have seen it by then.

Always book online - and book yourself a 'student' ticket. It's 2 quid cheaper, and in years now I've never had one of the kids who checks the tickets ask to see my'Student ID.'
And even if they did, I would say 'sorry haven't brought my student card, but I'm a mature student doing a PHD in gynaecology at the University of Bullst...' how likely is he to stop you going in and make a song and dance? Not very likely...

Never buy a 'luxury' seat. With the above student ticket, on a Sunday night when it's not busy, no-one ever comes in with you to show you to your seat. So you can go sit in a 'luxury' seat with your student ticket, for about half the price.
Even if they do show you to your seat, just wait until they've left and move!

If you must eat and drink (I never see the need - or at best, I take a small bottle of water with me) then take your own snacks. If you stop at a petrol station on the way, you can get identical big bags of sweets as they sell there, so no-one's gonna stop you taking them in. Or better still, if you want to take something different in to eat, just hide the snacks under your jumper or in the missus' handbag!


Try these tips - they work! biggrin




lazystudent

1,789 posts

160 months

Saturday 21st April 2012
quotequote all
The public transport of the cinema world are surely Vue cinemas. What.the.fk.

Dirty, small, crap seats, not that cheap, crap sound quality, and does anyone EVER pay the extra for the VIP seats?

They're always full though.

TheHeretic

73,668 posts

254 months

Saturday 21st April 2012
quotequote all
Haven't been to a cinema for a few years now. Probably never will. It is one of the reasons I don't mind tormenting films, (I'll buy them of I like them, a bit like a test drive).

essayer

9,008 posts

193 months

Saturday 21st April 2012
quotequote all
I find Odeon pretty terrible, the seats are too close together (unless you pay for the Premium seats)

I remember seeing Star Wars 3 at the cinema and someone had bought a BABY in with them rofl

lazystudent

1,789 posts

160 months

Saturday 21st April 2012
quotequote all
TheHeretic said:
Haven't been to a cinema for a few years now. Probably never will. It is one of the reasons I don't mind tormenting films, (I'll buy them of I like them, a bit like a test drive).
How pissed off can you make a film? hehe

Puggit

48,354 posts

247 months

Saturday 21st April 2012
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Large LED screen and surround sound, I don't mind waiting to watch it without problems smile

HOGEPH

5,249 posts

185 months

Saturday 21st April 2012
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The advantages of watching films at home.

1) Stop the film when you need a pee/another bottle of wine.

2) You can drink wine whilst watching the film,

3) No people lacking in social graces, or as I call them, s.

4) When the film is finished, you are already home.

5) Somewhat cheaper.

TDV6

1,021 posts

189 months

Saturday 21st April 2012
quotequote all
Good attempt. Must rant harder.



I fking hate the cinema.

Ray Luxury-Yacht

8,910 posts

215 months

Saturday 21st April 2012
quotequote all
HOGEPH said:
2) You can drink wine whilst watching the film,
As it happens, our little local two screen place has a fully licensed bar, and you can take your drinks in with you, which is nice.


Dalto123

3,198 posts

162 months

Saturday 21st April 2012
quotequote all
Excellent rant OP, plenty of curse words, I give you and 8.5 out of 10.

You're absolutely right though. Was at the cinema not too long ago, and I was just livid, not only at the prices, the stty seats and food (not to mention the prices, hence I are my own sweets in). But worst of all are the people. For the duration of the whole film (The Woman in Black) people behind me were eating as loud as possible and having full blown conversations. I nearly walked out because was so pissed off. And the only reason I didnt turn round and say something was because we were in Croydon and didn't fancy my chances with a bunch of chavs.

TheHeretic

73,668 posts

254 months

Saturday 21st April 2012
quotequote all
lazystudent said:
TheHeretic said:
Haven't been to a cinema for a few years now. Probably never will. It is one of the reasons I don't mind tormenting films, (I'll buy them of I like them, a bit like a test drive).
How pissed off can you make a film? hehe
Nnnnnng! Although, I agree, there are some films that make your eyes bleed, and your ears leak. That could well be considered tormenting.

Wheelrepairit

2,904 posts

203 months

Saturday 21st April 2012
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The OPs post is the very reason why 1996 was the last time I visited a cinema.

Terrible terrible places.

anonymous-user

53 months

Saturday 21st April 2012
quotequote all
A consumer must consume something and play a price, to consume something a not pay a fee is classed as illegal/free loading. It goes back 1000 of years just the consuming item changes. Yes downloading is wrong but a growing amount of people do it, for various reasons that the film studios wear blinked eyes against.

Not much is done until the profit margins are hit at a greater state, maybe they might change the business model.