The Thread Where Doofus Shouts Into The Void

The Thread Where Doofus Shouts Into The Void

Author
Discussion

Doofus

Original Poster:

25,732 posts

172 months

Friday 30th March 2018
quotequote all
Dear Dustmen,

How difficult is it to PUT THE DUSTBIN BACK WHERE YOU BLOODY FOUND IT?

Doofus

Original Poster:

25,732 posts

172 months

Friday 30th March 2018
quotequote all
PH: Where gushing sycophancy matters

Jasandjules

69,825 posts

228 months

Friday 30th March 2018
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I would like to know this too as sometimes walking the baby involves me stopping every 15ft to move a bin out of the way - I am not pushing a pram in the road FFS...

Doofus

Original Poster:

25,732 posts

172 months

Friday 30th March 2018
quotequote all
It's just cricket, FFS. Nobody cares!

Jonboy_t

5,038 posts

182 months

Friday 30th March 2018
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Doofus - you seem good at this. Could you shout at my neighbours cat and tell it to stop stting in my garden please? I’ve tried myself and it hasn’t worked yet, but you seem better at it than me.

Thanks in advance

Shuvi McTupya

24,460 posts

246 months

Friday 30th March 2018
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When I were a lad, and we all had metal bins with no wheels, The bin men used to go round to the back of the houses through narrow alleys, open our back gates and physically carry the bins out to the waiting rubbish truck, they would then carry the empties back and put them where they found them, close the gate and go to the next house.

You would think that with them now being on wheels they would be happy, but no..they won't take it because it is facing the wrong way, or it isn't quite on the bloody pavement, or the lid isn't closed properly ..and soon they will have sensors on them so you can be charged if they are too heavy..

I wish wheely bins had never been bloody invented!!


Ahbefive

11,657 posts

171 months

Friday 30th March 2018
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Binmen are s. Ours insist on leaving the bin in front of the driveway so that when we get home from work we have to get out of the car to move it before we can park.

Thats why they are binmen. Stoopid is what stoopid does.

Buster73

5,043 posts

152 months

Friday 30th March 2018
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Came out of my garage a few years ago to find the bin man walking past my bin at the end of the drive , I looked at him and asked him why he was walking past it and not taking it to the bin wagon , his reply was that it wasn’t close enough to the road and for health and safety reasons he couldn’t walk another few feet onto my drive.

I burst out laughing which seemed to annoy him , but calling him a lazy t wat under my breath but loud enough for him to hear set off an incident of comical proportions.

This included the driver getting out and shouting at me that I’d abused one of his lads and we’ll stop collecting your bins in the future.

All my fault apparently for not putting the bin a couple of feet closer to the roadside.

With reference to the tipping thread ,this is only one of the reasons I’d never tip a bin man.

Doofus

Original Poster:

25,732 posts

172 months

Friday 30th March 2018
quotequote all
Oi, EvilCorp! Why can't you make yoghurt pots with flat, round bottoms so we have a chance of getting all the yoghurt out without using a fking cotton bud?

Doofus

Original Poster:

25,732 posts

172 months

Friday 30th March 2018
quotequote all
So I read a news article about carhire firms having to make their pricing more transparent and now PH is bombarding me with ads for Holiday Autos.

Remarketing FTW, guys!

Doofus

Original Poster:

25,732 posts

172 months

Friday 30th March 2018
quotequote all
It's fine for you to go out and do whatever women do on a Friday, but don't take all the fking keys! I'm trapped in the house now.

I have a good mind to burn it down, just to teach you a lesson!

Halmyre

11,148 posts

138 months

Friday 30th March 2018
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Doofus said:
It's just cricket, FFS. Nobody cares!
I was watching the news last night with something close to astonishment. We truly live in a crazy world.

wolfracesonic

6,941 posts

126 months

Friday 30th March 2018
quotequote all
Doofus said:
It's fine for you to go out and do whatever women do on a Friday, but don't take all the fking keys! I'm trapped in the house now and the bin men are coming, I can hear them, just round the corner and I just know they're going to...................

I have a good mind to burn it down, just to teach you a lesson!
FTFY

Spare tyre

9,460 posts

129 months

Friday 30th March 2018
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Rubbish Fred

Shuvi McTupya

24,460 posts

246 months

Friday 30th March 2018
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Buster73 said:
With reference to the tipping thread ,this is only one of the reasons I’d never tip a bin man.
I would tip them, but I might break a nail getting my wallet out..elf n safety prohibits me from doing it.

Willy Nilly

12,511 posts

166 months

Friday 30th March 2018
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How hard is it for you to retreive your own bin rather than the bin men putting who knows how many bins back in the right place everytime? If you increased your council tax contributions enough they'd probably tip toe around in ballet shoes, polish it after they'd emptied it and put back with millimeter precision.

magooagain

9,910 posts

169 months

Friday 30th March 2018
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They didn't collect my rubbish one time,but I knew where one of the bin men parked his motorbike in the village so he could ps off home after the round.
He came back to find two full black bags on his bike.

Doofus

Original Poster:

25,732 posts

172 months

Friday 30th March 2018
quotequote all
How come my central heating timer knows when the clocks change? I'm nearly fifty, and I never have a b,oody clue until someone on the telly reminds me.

Come to that, why do microwave ovens have clocks anyway?

Vincefox

20,566 posts

171 months

Friday 30th March 2018
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WHERE'S MY BLOODY TELLY CONTROL?

Doofus

Original Poster:

25,732 posts

172 months

Friday 30th March 2018
quotequote all
Note To Self:

Remember to water next door's plants next week, even thoughe she never bothers to do ours.

Hashtag Goodneighboursshebetterleavemesomethinginherwill