Neighbourly Issues

[romeogolf]

Narcisus said:

I would paint the other side of my fence day-glo orange ...

I always assumed the reverse of your fence is for the neighbour to do? We've painted our right-hand fences which belong to next door and we offered both behind and adjacent neighbours to paint the reverse of the panels when we were doing our sides but both declined!

[TwistingMyMelon]

Also couldn't a lorries crane clear that fence from the road?

Bit of an ask , but surely it could almost do it?

[romeogolf]

roadsmash said:

Send him a link to this thread OP.

Just so he knows loads of people think he’s a raving .

I'm mostly just relieved that most people seem to have agreed with us on this. Always the risk of it going the other way if you're not too sure!

[romeogolf]

TwistingMyMelon said:

Also couldn't a lorries crane clear that fence from the road?

Bit of an ask , but surely it could almost do it?

I think that conversation was had and the answer was no because it's on a corner with thick bushes etc. I'm getting this third-hand as I'm not at home today.

[dhutch]

Cant help but notice you clearly have a digger in your garden? At which point handballing the materials down the path is bobbins work.

At least you have the side path, seems like a lot of the houses don't even have that? Tight are developers.

romeogolf said:

Mr Pointy said:

I'd ask for a breakdown of the additional £800

It's for 1.5 days' labour for the two workers

£265/day for a labour.... pull the other one! Unless you are mars or something, that is triple the going rate her in the NW! I have a dry stone waller doing 8 hours days for £120 a pop.



I would like to set fire to his bin, or place a 1ton boulder just in front of his drive, but its not worth it and if he gets even half a sniff its you he likely has far more time to make your life hell than you have his.


Also, amazing that you fence is 3.1 panels long, what a pita!



Daniel

[superlightr]

TwistingMyMelon said:

TBF maybe the neighbors got a point, I wouldn't want a delivery lorry lifting a heavy load on my blocked paved driveway, ive seen several sink in the past, more so if they weren't done properly in the first place

You got the digger through which is the worst bit, there are also tiny diggers you can hire for this specific issue of narrow access

Id grab a barrow and get everything through myself, got mates? Get them round, youll do it in an hour. Its amazing what you can do when you put the graft in,.

Id stop any dealings with neighbor as soon as he got a bit kunty tbf and just do the hard graft myself

I would go with this. You dont have a "right" to use his land and he is entailed to refuse access for no reason at all. Its a pain you cant use his land but hey ho.

£800 for labour to move the materials! - Sounds like a DIY/mates help to save the £800 or post on PH for able bodies and then have a great BBQ party in the garden !

[bennno]

Op - is there a bit more to this? you mentioned you offered to jet wash his drive etc, said it was just for digger and unloading, but them mentioned barrowing stuff out down side of house. Did you intend to bring materials in & digger in / take waste out etc all over his drive? Do you have a skip or is it being loaded in to a pick up - either way did you expect to put either there?

Rightly he might be a bit peeved about being sent numbers or his number given to others to organise access with, you might have spoken to him in person and organised this. While you are at work, theres a risk he's needing to supervise delivery drivers, unable to park or move his car, left with damage and mess over driveway.

Personally Id have asked him very nicely, if that didnt work I'd have shared that it was going to cost you about £500 more in labour and asked if he'd grant access if you'd split that with him, or if he'd do so if you donate the value to a local charity + offered to supervise deliveries to ensure no damage.

[TA14]

TwistingMyMelon said:

TBF maybe the neighbors got a point, I wouldn't want a delivery lorry lifting a heavy load on my blocked paved driveway, ive seen several sink in the past, more so if they weren't done properly in the first place

You got the digger through which is the worst bit, there are also tiny diggers you can hire for this specific issue of narrow access

Id grab a barrow and get everything through myself, got mates? Get them round, youll do it in an hour. Its amazing what you can do when you put the graft in,.

Id stop any dealings with neighbor as soon as he got a bit kunty tbf and just do the hard graft myself

I'd agree with most of that. Note that block paving done properly is very strong - although in this case I wouldn't risk it because of the potential grief from the neighbour.

One thing that does go through my mind is if you lift one panel about 2ft high and prop it so that it looks like you're about to remove it to gain access...

[romeogolf]

bennno said:

Op - is there a bit more to this? you mentioned you offered to jet wash his drive etc, said it was just for digger and unloading, but them mentioned barrowing stuff out down side of house. Did you intend to bring materials in & digger in / take waste out etc all over his drive? Do you have a skip or is it being loaded in to a pick up - either way did you expect to put either there?

Rightly he might be a bit peeved about being sent numbers or his number given to others to organise access with, you might have spoken to him in person and organised this. While you are at work, theres a risk he's needing to supervise delivery drivers, unable to park or move his car, left with damage and mess over driveway.

Personally Id have asked him very nicely, if that didnt work I'd have shared that it was going to cost you about £500 more in labour and asked if he'd grant access if you'd split that with him, or if he'd do so if you donate the value to a local charity + offered to supervise deliveries to ensure no damage.

Nope, nothing more to it than is written here. The agreement was to bring a digger in on day 1 (and out at the end) and then to have paving slabs lifted in and rubble lifted out with a crane-lift over the end of the garden. We assumed his issue when he refused was because of dirt, so offered to jet wash the whole drive to ensure he wasn't inconvenienced, but he said his concern was the weight of the truck.

His number hasn't been given out - The guys doing the work knocked on his door today to chat it through in person after his dodgy text to me yesterday, and my other half is at home and also went round to speak with him. My other half will be home the full time as he's working from home during the lockdown.

This is in addition to various conversations we had over the last few weeks while we were in the garden chatting over the fence about the job. At no point did he raise an issue until yesterday.

All rubbish would be in our garden in those skip bags that get lifted out at the end of the job. Instead of that, they'll now need to wheel it up and down the side of the house.

I think we asked him nicely, indeed the first chat about it was very much "the guys mentioned it would be easier if they had access over this fence but we weren't sure if that would be alright by you..."

[bennno]

romeogolf said:

Nope, nothing more to it than is written here. The agreement was to bring a digger in on day 1 (and out at the end) and then to have paving slabs lifted in and rubble lifted out with a crane-lift over the end of the garden. We assumed his issue when he refused was because of dirt, so offered to jet wash the whole drive to ensure he wasn't inconvenienced, but he said his concern was the weight of the truck.

His number hasn't been given out - The guys doing the work knocked on his door today to chat it through in person after his dodgy text to me yesterday, and my other half is at home and also went round to speak with him. My other half will be home the full time as he's working from home during the lockdown.

This is in addition to various conversations we had over the last few weeks while we were in the garden chatting over the fence about the job. At no point did he raise an issue until yesterday.

All rubbish would be in our garden in those skip bags that get lifted out at the end of the job. Instead of that, they'll now need to wheel it up and down the side of the house.

I think we asked him nicely, indeed the first chat about it was very much "the guys mentioned it would be easier if they had access over this fence but we weren't sure if that would be alright by you..."

So you spoke with him to ask if it would be alright by him - how did he respond?

Point being its not just materials being lifted in, its also fence coming down for a digger being brought in and removed and all the waste being removed over his drive.

You can understand that he might consider it an imposition and given risk to damage of drive and potential mess that he'd not unreasonably decline?

[steveo3002]

next time theres a banger for sale on facebook , buy it , rego it to him then park there and slash the tyres

[romeogolf]

bennno said:

So you spoke with him to ask if it would be alright by him - how did he respond?

Point being its not just materials being lifted in, its a digger being brought in and removed and all the waste being removed over his drive.

You can understand that he might consider it an imposition and given risk to damage of drive and potential mess that he'd not unreasonably decline?

He didn't have any issue with it, he just wanted us to make sure they put all his gravel back along the fence and didn't hit his car!

As I say, the dirt clearly isn't the issue as we offered to tidy it and I'm sure we could have found a compromise with the drive if he'd been more amenable. The guys doing our garden did our drive and would have been happy to repair damage if caused, but he just wasn't open to the conversation.

There are two issues at play: The facts about the risk of damage or inconvenience, and the emotion behind it and how he approached it. Despite us being (as far as I can see) friendly and chatty about it, he's become defensive to the point of moving his car halfway down his drive and seems to have changed his mind overnight. Between the first conversation and our text yesterday, nothing changed except his generosity. Had he been adamant from the start we'd have made plans months ago when the fence was done and not had a concrete post intalled between the gates!

[bennno]

romeogolf said:

He didn't have any issue with it, he just wanted us to make sure they put all his gravel back along the fence and didn't hit his car!

As I say, the dirt clearly isn't the issue as we offered to tidy it and I'm sure we could have found a compromise with the drive if he'd been more amenable. The guys doing our garden did our drive and would have been happy to repair damage if caused, but he just wasn't open to the conversation.

There are two issues at play: The facts about the risk of damage or inconvenience, and the emotion behind it and how he approached it. Despite us being (as far as I can see) friendly and chatty about it, he's become defensive to the point of moving his car halfway down his drive and seems to have changed his mind overnight. Between the first conversation and our text yesterday, nothing changed except his generosity. Had he been adamant from the start we'd have made plans months ago when the fence was done and not had a concrete post intalled between the gates!

had you spoken to him about it in the interim to confirm dates and that it was def ok from his perspective - or just a text last night?

[Captain Answer]

Neighbour seems a cock womble but saying that I don't think I would have even asked, just assumed the job had to be done via myown access, whatever that might be and crack on

[romeogolf]

bennno said:

had you spoken to him about it in the interim to confirm dates and that it was def ok from his perspective - or just a text last night?

The last time we spoke was in May I think when we were painting the fences and asked if he wanted to move his car to avoid splashes. He asked about when the garden was being done as we'd originally told him about it being started in March, but lockdown delayed things. We raised it last summer when we had the fence done and said we'd likely be doing the garden in the next few months, then we got the quote late 2019 and checked with him again following the conversation with the guys doing it.

The works weren't a surprise to him.

[bennno]

romeogolf said:

bennno said:

had you spoken to him about it in the interim to confirm dates and that it was def ok from his perspective - or just a text last night?

The last time we spoke was in May I think when we were painting the fences and asked if he wanted to move his car to avoid splashes. He asked about when the garden was being done as we'd originally told him about it being started in March, but lockdown delayed things. We raised it last summer when we had the fence done and said we'd likely be doing the garden in the next few months, then we got the quote late 2019 and checked with him again following the conversation with the guys doing it.

The works weren't a surprise to him.

Look, its perhaps a lesson learnt but a thank you note thanking him for agreeing access, advising him of the date of work a couple of weeks in advance, accompanied by a crate of beer might have got a better outcome.

You arent entitled to use his drive, you can just ask and be neighbourly and see if he will permit.

[Narcisus]

bennno said:

romeogolf said:

bennno said:

had you spoken to him about it in the interim to confirm dates and that it was def ok from his perspective - or just a text last night?

The last time we spoke was in May I think when we were painting the fences and asked if he wanted to move his car to avoid splashes. He asked about when the garden was being done as we'd originally told him about it being started in March, but lockdown delayed things. We raised it last summer when we had the fence done and said we'd likely be doing the garden in the next few months, then we got the quote late 2019 and checked with him again following the conversation with the guys doing it.

The works weren't a surprise to him.

Look, its perhaps a lesson learnt but a thank you note thanking him for agreeing access, advising him of the date of work a couple of weeks in advance, accompanied by a crate of beer might have got a better outcome.

You arent entitled to use his drive, you can just ask and be neighbourly and see if he will permit.

No point pussyfooting around with w###ers,.... Bottle of wine this... Crate of beer that... If a simple 'now them mate can we' doesn't work as it would with myself or my neighbors ..... #uck 'em.

[Camoradi]

If he's saying no there's not a lot you can do. One day he will need your co-operation in some way, at which point you can just stare into the middle distance while you "give it some thought"

[dhutch]

Yes, ask nicely, talk it through, if they agree then great. Once it is all over then they get a bottle of nice wine as a thank you gift. But not as a bribe ahead of the game.

For what it's worth, I would be very hesitant to allow what you are suggesting to be done if I was in is shoes.
-Fence might well not go back the same.
-Point loading from digger, and skidding rubber tracks can leave damage and marks to driveway.
-Point loading of BM hiab waggon dropping off paving causing damage, ditto grab waggon.
-Dropped loose material from grab waggon job making a mess of the gravel and drive.
-Pressurewasher removing patina and splashing sh ite everywhere makes the job worse not better.
-Faff of so far a minimum of four interactions.
I am picky about what things look like, damage from works, etc. All in all, a load of risk and ball ache for nothing.

Yes you could do it with almost zero damage, tarps, sand over paving edges to spread loads, but again, no gain for me.

Your garden is not huge, and you have managed to get a mini digger in, so not a big job to handball a bit of material in an out.

Tell your contractor there is no way your paying £250/day for labouring.

Daniel

[bennno]

Narcisus said:

bennno said:

romeogolf said:

bennno said:

had you spoken to him about it in the interim to confirm dates and that it was def ok from his perspective - or just a text last night?

The last time we spoke was in May I think when we were painting the fences and asked if he wanted to move his car to avoid splashes. He asked about when the garden was being done as we'd originally told him about it being started in March, but lockdown delayed things. We raised it last summer when we had the fence done and said we'd likely be doing the garden in the next few months, then we got the quote late 2019 and checked with him again following the conversation with the guys doing it.

The works weren't a surprise to him.

Look, its perhaps a lesson learnt but a thank you note thanking him for agreeing access, advising him of the date of work a couple of weeks in advance, accompanied by a crate of beer might have got a better outcome.

You arent entitled to use his drive, you can just ask and be neighbourly and see if he will permit.

No point pussyfooting around with w###ers,.... Bottle of wine this... Crate of beer that... If a simple 'now them mate can we' doesn't work as it would with myself or my neighbors ..... #uck 'em.

In which case you like the OP in this instance would be barrowing stuff down the side of your house.

Im not sure why anybody would think the guy is a w€€€€er for not wanting to risk his drive, have it and his car covered in crap, be inconvenienced etc.