Not bonding with my dog (and vice versa?)
Discussion
Pesty said:
Great story. What a fabulous little pal you have.
I posted these pics before I think but heres one of him while he was settling in.I can't remember how long I'd had him there now as it was a while ago, but obviously half recovered health wise. It was sad in a way... watching him play with a big chunk of food and had no idea what to do with it. For a while he was trying to hide them in my house to eat later. My other rescue was absolutely loving it as she was following him around and hoovering them up
Another half recovered one :
First time in a dog bed (he had one for a month before this but refused to use it):
Taking part in a charity parade thing :
He has some behaviour issues still, mainly separation anxiety. But its nothing that can't be worked around, he's an awesome little guy and he's no longer up for rehoming as he has settled in here too well and it wouldn't be fair to move him on really
Edited by KFC on Monday 24th August 05:17
Sorry for the delay in replying, thanks you all very much for your replies.
I've been trying to make a conscious effort to interact with him more and it seems to be working. Some days are better than others, but I think there is some progress. He's certainly enjoying playing fetch with me, although he isn't entirely grasping the concept that he has to bring his ball back before I can throw it for him again!
He seems to be slowly getting into the swing of things although he still doesn't understand that his teeth aren't to be used on his mum and dad when he's excited (or any other time!) - not too sure how to go about that one...
Overall though, he's a lovely chap who will hopefully come to be the happiest hound around in time.
KFC, you must be really chuffed to have made such a difference to his quality of life
I've been trying to make a conscious effort to interact with him more and it seems to be working. Some days are better than others, but I think there is some progress. He's certainly enjoying playing fetch with me, although he isn't entirely grasping the concept that he has to bring his ball back before I can throw it for him again!
He seems to be slowly getting into the swing of things although he still doesn't understand that his teeth aren't to be used on his mum and dad when he's excited (or any other time!) - not too sure how to go about that one...
Overall though, he's a lovely chap who will hopefully come to be the happiest hound around in time.
KFC, you must be really chuffed to have made such a difference to his quality of life
Good to hear that things are improving
I tend to forget how long it can take sometimes - Sam whippet (who was always the more nervous of the two) really wasn't very keen on human contact when we first got him. He had had two 'homes' (breeder and rescue) before we got him, and I think he just didn't know whether or not to trust people. It took two years before he jumped onto OH's lap for a cuddle. Now he does it every day
I tend to forget how long it can take sometimes - Sam whippet (who was always the more nervous of the two) really wasn't very keen on human contact when we first got him. He had had two 'homes' (breeder and rescue) before we got him, and I think he just didn't know whether or not to trust people. It took two years before he jumped onto OH's lap for a cuddle. Now he does it every day
Pozzy said:
He's certainly enjoying playing fetch with me, although he isn't entirely grasping the concept that he has to bring his ball back before I can throw it for him again!
You threw it - you fetch it Pozzy said:
He seems to be slowly getting into the swing of things although he still doesn't understand that his teeth aren't to be used on his mum and dad when he's excited (or any other time!) - not too sure how to go about that one...
Have you tried 'yelping' or saying 'ow, ow, ow' in a high pitched voice? They usually learn bite inhibition from their littermates in this way.moorx said:
Have you tried 'yelping' or saying 'ow, ow, ow' in a high pitched voice? They usually learn bite inhibition from their littermates in this way.
I do try and do this, but we struggle to get the timing right at the moment - it's barely a nip and he's pretty much been and gone before you can react! Whenever I've managed to time it right it hasn't really phased him and he's carried on bouncing about like a loon!It's always difficult forming a relationship with a new dog. We seem to expect the new dog to fall into the same habits, characteristics and behaviour patterns as the previous one. That's certainly how I felt with our new dog, looking back over the 15 months we've had him and its made me realise that this wasn't fair on him.
Its taken us almost a year to bond and get "affection" from our new dog. He's a rescue (like our previous one was) and I think we expected that once he got settled and learnt he was staying with us, he would show affection in the same ways. He doesn't. He does it his own way.
OP, be patient, try new things and give the dog and your relationship as much time as you can. It will be worth it in the end.
Its taken us almost a year to bond and get "affection" from our new dog. He's a rescue (like our previous one was) and I think we expected that once he got settled and learnt he was staying with us, he would show affection in the same ways. He doesn't. He does it his own way.
OP, be patient, try new things and give the dog and your relationship as much time as you can. It will be worth it in the end.
He is only young and like my Dogs you dont really know their backgrounds that well. I have bonded straight away with all of my Dogs when we got our Puppy last October there was no way we were not coming home without him. But everyone is different and having another Dog after losing your Pal is difficult but these little fellas need us and you must be a very caring Dog owner to take him to work with you.
Just an update after a couple of years (PH has lost my username somehow, hence the new one!)
Buddy is an integral part of our family now, and although he's still a bit aloof sometimes I don't think we'd be without him. Just the sight of him wagging his tail when he sees you is enough to know that we're family!
We have struggled to find a food that agrees with him (most seem to either go straight through him, make him itch like mad or both), but we've finally found that Arden Grange fish and potato plus a tin of sardines a day seems to make for a happy dog! We're just struggling with portion sizes at the minute, hence the visible ribs:
He's certainly pretty intelligent, so although he likes his routine a bit of variation every now and again piques his interest.
We also discovered that he is in fact a German shepherd crossed with a staffy thanks to a DNA test from Pets at Home - not a labrador or corgi in sight!
Buddy is an integral part of our family now, and although he's still a bit aloof sometimes I don't think we'd be without him. Just the sight of him wagging his tail when he sees you is enough to know that we're family!
We have struggled to find a food that agrees with him (most seem to either go straight through him, make him itch like mad or both), but we've finally found that Arden Grange fish and potato plus a tin of sardines a day seems to make for a happy dog! We're just struggling with portion sizes at the minute, hence the visible ribs:
He's certainly pretty intelligent, so although he likes his routine a bit of variation every now and again piques his interest.
We also discovered that he is in fact a German shepherd crossed with a staffy thanks to a DNA test from Pets at Home - not a labrador or corgi in sight!
Plew said:
Just an update after a couple of years (PH has lost my username somehow, hence the new one!)
Buddy is an integral part of our family now, and although he's still a bit aloof sometimes I don't think we'd be without him. Just the sight of him wagging his tail when he sees you is enough to know that we're family!
We have struggled to find a food that agrees with him (most seem to either go straight through him, make him itch like mad or both), but we've finally found that Arden Grange fish and potato plus a tin of sardines a day seems to make for a happy dog! We're just struggling with portion sizes at the minute, hence the visible ribs:
He's certainly pretty intelligent, so although he likes his routine a bit of variation every now and again piques his interest.
We also discovered that he is in fact a German shepherd crossed with a staffy thanks to a DNA test from Pets at Home - not a labrador or corgi in sight!
Well done.Buddy is an integral part of our family now, and although he's still a bit aloof sometimes I don't think we'd be without him. Just the sight of him wagging his tail when he sees you is enough to know that we're family!
We have struggled to find a food that agrees with him (most seem to either go straight through him, make him itch like mad or both), but we've finally found that Arden Grange fish and potato plus a tin of sardines a day seems to make for a happy dog! We're just struggling with portion sizes at the minute, hence the visible ribs:
He's certainly pretty intelligent, so although he likes his routine a bit of variation every now and again piques his interest.
We also discovered that he is in fact a German shepherd crossed with a staffy thanks to a DNA test from Pets at Home - not a labrador or corgi in sight!
We use Arden Grange too, it was what the dogs trust gave him so just kept the diet the same. We're giving him a little less than the guide lines suggest, fairly active with a 4-6 mile daily walk. Certainly not too skinny, usually has a few treats while we're out. Poos look good
When we were keeping to the AG guidelines he often wasn't all that hungry, particularly in the warmer weather, a little less and he woofs it down.
AntiLagGC8 said:
KFC said:
Like others have said, sometimes it can take time. Even if your dog looks physically healthy their could be non physical things there. Maybe he's been beaten in the past and he's wary of new people. Maybe he's just not quite sure of his surroundings. Maybe he's wondering why you're feeding him instead of chasing him away or shouting at him.
When I got this dog he really didn't like me at all :
For the first few weeks he was clearly not happy being near me... he always chose to stay in the corner of the room or behind the sofa as much as he could. My other rescue dog was helping a bit... he bonded with her quite quickly and he then started following her around all day.
Dogs are good at adapting though. They realise you're now feeding for them, you're caring for them and you're making sure they're safe. Its just some take longer than others. And once he's more affectionate with you its easier the other way too.
Heres that dog right now, I'm lying in my bed:
When I'm at home he simply refuses to be in a different room to me. If I go outside for a break, he comes with me. If I go to the toilet he'll need to come also. If I've got people over and need to close the door then he'll lie on the floor outside until I come back out If I'm at my desk he'll sleep on my feet. If I'm in bed his usual preferred place is under the covers and lying on my legs. He's basically a different dog to the one that was given to me.
I would stick with what you have, its just going to take more time. I guess within a couple of months you're going to have a dog thats way more loyal than one you've brought up from a puppy yourself. They don't really know any different... humans give them food and thats pretty much it. I think if you gave my 'pet' dog a biscuit she'd quite happily go off with you on a lead, no problems. No way my rescues would... if i'm not going then they ain't going either. The rescues also seem the ones happiest to see me when I come home every day!
You're a great person for helping the little guy get back to health and being patient with him, he's obviously lucky to have you as his owner.When I got this dog he really didn't like me at all :
For the first few weeks he was clearly not happy being near me... he always chose to stay in the corner of the room or behind the sofa as much as he could. My other rescue dog was helping a bit... he bonded with her quite quickly and he then started following her around all day.
Dogs are good at adapting though. They realise you're now feeding for them, you're caring for them and you're making sure they're safe. Its just some take longer than others. And once he's more affectionate with you its easier the other way too.
Heres that dog right now, I'm lying in my bed:
When I'm at home he simply refuses to be in a different room to me. If I go outside for a break, he comes with me. If I go to the toilet he'll need to come also. If I've got people over and need to close the door then he'll lie on the floor outside until I come back out If I'm at my desk he'll sleep on my feet. If I'm in bed his usual preferred place is under the covers and lying on my legs. He's basically a different dog to the one that was given to me.
I would stick with what you have, its just going to take more time. I guess within a couple of months you're going to have a dog thats way more loyal than one you've brought up from a puppy yourself. They don't really know any different... humans give them food and thats pretty much it. I think if you gave my 'pet' dog a biscuit she'd quite happily go off with you on a lead, no problems. No way my rescues would... if i'm not going then they ain't going either. The rescues also seem the ones happiest to see me when I come home every day!
Well done.
I've had a hard time bonding with out third rescue GSD. She's all black, deaf and partially sighted and doesn't know how to play except with a football, so football it is.
Had her 3 years and she still often prefers her own company but just wanders in for reassurance now and then oe hen she wants a walk or feeding. Lovely temperament though.
OP, if yours is GSD cross have her tested for pancreatic enzyme deficiency. two of our 3 have had it and it makes if difficult for them to absorb nutrition. Treatment is normally just a powder added to meals.
I've had a hard time bonding with out third rescue GSD. She's all black, deaf and partially sighted and doesn't know how to play except with a football, so football it is.
Had her 3 years and she still often prefers her own company but just wanders in for reassurance now and then oe hen she wants a walk or feeding. Lovely temperament though.
OP, if yours is GSD cross have her tested for pancreatic enzyme deficiency. two of our 3 have had it and it makes if difficult for them to absorb nutrition. Treatment is normally just a powder added to meals.
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