You know you have a dog when...

You know you have a dog when...

Author
Discussion

markymarkthree

445 posts

119 months

Thursday 14th November
quotequote all
When you go to bed and your side of the bed is nice and warm but the mutt is in his bed.

PositronicRay

16,978 posts

131 months

Thursday 14th November
quotequote all
Prewash on dishwasher no longer required.

monoloco

276 posts

140 months

Thursday 14th November
quotequote all
..when you fancy a bag of crisps and you have to sneak off to the bathroom to eat them

andym1603

1,599 posts

120 months

Thursday 14th November
quotequote all
When you cannot leave food on the kitchen worktop for fear of it being stolen on the way past.
Elastic drool. hanging from the ceiling and anything else within range.

Dift

1,504 posts

175 months

Thursday 14th November
quotequote all
Electronicpants said:
GAjon said:
When you have Autumn leaf fall on your garden it becomes a minefield!
Ha, this is the bane of my life at the moment, wandering around on my tip toes squinting my eyes, poo bag in hand trying to decipher leaves from crap in poor light with the rain running down my neck. I've bough a petrol back pack ghost busters style blower because of this. Who you gona call? Poo busters!
I would exercise extreme caution when using any garden blower especially if it has both a suck and blow function... Having accidentally sucked up a poo bag in a garden vac, the result is without the most traumatic experience I believe you can ever go through.

Having dismantled the vac to expose the poo covered innards, you have to retrieve the remnants of the poo bag which have wound themselves round the fan/mulcher. The contents of said poo bag are obliterated into a fine mist which constantly finds its way into your nose, no matter how many deep over the shoulder breathes away from the vac you have or how high you have pulled up your jumper over your nose. However, following 'substantial' cleaning,.. while feeling a sense of relief to see the light at the end of this traumatic tunnel, starting up the vac again for the first time releases a further cloud of microscopic poo particles out of the exhaust/air vent, requiring you to again breakdown the device for further cleaning... all the time the dog is watching you while she thinks "I dont really think he wanted to do that".

I feel so guilty when I have to sneak on my 'good coat' so my little shadow doesn't hear / see me, I have resorted to not wearing one when I go out laugh

Saleen836

6,965 posts

157 months

Thursday 14th November
quotequote all
When your dog photo bombs your yoga practice!
https://www.facebook.com/natsluder/posts/102213633...

laugh

FourWheelDrift

Original Poster:

78,618 posts

232 months

Friday 15th November
quotequote all
When you arrive home and are desperate for a pee, in normal family life you would ignore the family just go to the loo and get on with it. But if you have a dog who's so excited to see you again after being away for years, months, days, couple of hours you have to make a fuss of them, it is the dog law. Hold it in.

FiF

36,239 posts

199 months

Friday 15th November
quotequote all
Someone insists on joining you during morning loo visit and insists on licking your leg while you're sat on the pot.

MXRod

1,336 posts

95 months

Monday 18th November
quotequote all
Your freshly paint door frame has hairs caught on it at dog height ,even though you're sure the dog was confined to another room

Edited by MXRod on Monday 18th November 06:44

Challo

5,073 posts

103 months

Monday 18th November
quotequote all
FiF said:
Someone insists on joining you during morning loo visit and insists on licking your leg while you're sat on the pot.
Yep. Any loo visit means I get a vistor, or if I shut the door he scratches at the door waiting to get in. haha

Jasandjules

63,375 posts

177 months

Monday 18th November
quotequote all
Challo said:
Yep. Any loo visit means I get a vistor, or if I shut the door he scratches at the door waiting to get in. haha
One of mine also likes to escort guests..... Not everyone is happy about it..... But she is....

Chester draws

790 posts

58 months

Monday 18th November
quotequote all
You have a selection of sticks outside your house that your dog has carried home...

And in a similar vein... you have more tennis balls in your house than you have ever bought.

FiF

36,239 posts

199 months

Tuesday 19th November
quotequote all
Chester draws said:
You have a selection of sticks outside your house that your dog has carried home...

And in a similar vein... you have more tennis balls in your house than you have ever bought.
Oh sweet Jesus, yes. Plus some of the balls are nearly brand spammers, and included are a couple of really good Kong chew proof versions plus one of those with flashing LEDs inside.

Plus in our case more single use plastic bottles in the recycling bin than you've bought. I swear when they put returnable deposits on bottles the dog could then buy himself a steak dinner every week.

MXRod

1,336 posts

95 months

Tuesday 19th November
quotequote all



Edited by MXRod on Tuesday 19th November 10:46

FourWheelDrift

Original Poster:

78,618 posts

232 months

Tuesday 19th November
quotequote all
You know you have a dog when you create youtube and instagram channels just for them and no one else.

Jack Mansfield

2,967 posts

38 months

PH Community Bloke

Tuesday 19th November
quotequote all
When you find yourself speaking to them in the most annoying "baby-talk" voice IN THE WORLD but you don't care cos that's how they understand you, right?

Pothole

27,788 posts

230 months

Tuesday 19th November
quotequote all
Baldchap said:
You know you have a dog when the little plastic tub at airport security has poo bags in it literally every time you fly. biglaugh
Erm, you know they can stay in your pockets, right?

Jasandjules

63,375 posts

177 months

Tuesday 19th November
quotequote all
MXRod said:



Edited by MXRod on Tuesday 19th November 10:46
I wish my garden looked that good, ours is like the Somme, totally churned up.... I mean we do have 3 dogs who are eight stone or so each but still.

gun12b

254 posts

146 months

Tuesday 26th November
quotequote all
when your house smells !

Steve Maund

419 posts

179 months

Tuesday 26th November
quotequote all
When you have to go home early because one dog has a infected paw and the wife has to take her to the Vets. I have to get home early because our big dopey bks of a 44Kg Rottie gets separation issues and will bark the neighborhood down.................