deaths / media / sympathy
Discussion
drivin_me_nuts said:
I find your point of tattoos a very interesting one. Since time began human beings have marked the deaths of signinficant others in their own bodies. It is a fascinating area of research and when you talk to those who do it, often they wll speak of a compulsion and fundamental need to mark that person's passing in their own skin. I'm about to do the same, for the vert same reason; need.
Don't you find it interesting, though, that it's an ancient tradition that has very suddenly returned in a huge way though?When I was growing up in the '80s and '90s, no-one had a tattoo. It was a sub-cultural thing you were either a part of or you weren't - bikers, truckers, forces etc. Then suddenly everyone's got one and I feel like I missed a memo saying 'you must all get at least one tattoo or you will be considered as having no identity'.
For entire swathes of the population, getting a 'tramp stamp' in the form of a meaningless pattern at the base of the back seems to be something done on autopilot with very little thought at all. I'm seeing more and more people with facial tattoos too, and all I can think is 'who on earth is going to give you a job?'
When Princess Di died, a friend of mine mentioned it to his brother's thick chav girlfriend, who was totally uninterested (or more probably "like, wateva".)
Then all the news reports came out about how the nation was grieving, how people were SO upset, etc etc.
Next thing is, this chav girl decides that she is distraught about Princess Di, and is rushing about busily signing books of condolances left right and centre.
Utterly laughable.
Then all the news reports came out about how the nation was grieving, how people were SO upset, etc etc.
Next thing is, this chav girl decides that she is distraught about Princess Di, and is rushing about busily signing books of condolances left right and centre.
Utterly laughable.
In a similar vein, people who insist on leaving flowers at the site of a death.
There was a lad in my town died in a stupid "gang fight", someone stabbed him.
Years later his mother is still putting flowers on the road where he died, and every so often manages to get herself into the local rag on some pretext or other to do with it.
Grieve, by all means, but you're just one of a million people in the world that was bereaved that week. Why must the rest of us be forced to be interested?
My family are under strict instructions if anything untimely happens to me, no public flowers. Have some dignity, grieve in private, not out loud.
There was a lad in my town died in a stupid "gang fight", someone stabbed him.
Years later his mother is still putting flowers on the road where he died, and every so often manages to get herself into the local rag on some pretext or other to do with it.
Grieve, by all means, but you're just one of a million people in the world that was bereaved that week. Why must the rest of us be forced to be interested?
My family are under strict instructions if anything untimely happens to me, no public flowers. Have some dignity, grieve in private, not out loud.
Twincam16 said:
drivin_me_nuts said:
I find your point of tattoos a very interesting one. Since time began human beings have marked the deaths of signinficant others in their own bodies. It is a fascinating area of research and when you talk to those who do it, often they wll speak of a compulsion and fundamental need to mark that person's passing in their own skin. I'm about to do the same, for the vert same reason; need.
Don't you find it interesting, though, that it's an ancient tradition that has very suddenly returned in a huge way though?When I was growing up in the '80s and '90s, no-one had a tattoo. It was a sub-cultural thing you were either a part of or you weren't - bikers, truckers, forces etc. Then suddenly everyone's got one and I feel like I missed a memo saying 'you must all get at least one tattoo or you will be considered as having no identity'.
For entire swathes of the population, getting a 'tramp stamp' in the form of a meaningless pattern at the base of the back seems to be something done on autopilot with very little thought at all. I'm seeing more and more people with facial tattoos too, and all I can think is 'who on earth is going to give you a job?'
Oh, the weird and wonderful human mind.
Ari said:
In a similar vein, people who insist on leaving flowers at the site of a death.
There was a lad in my town died in a stupid "gang fight", someone stabbed him.
Years later his mother is still putting flowers on the road where he died, and every so often manages to get herself into the local rag on some pretext or other to do with it.
Grieve, by all means, but you're just one of a million people in the world that was bereaved that week. Why must the rest of us be forced to be interested?
My family are under strict instructions if anything untimely happens to me, no public flowers. Have some dignity, grieve in private, not out loud.
Stop moaning, There was a lad in my town died in a stupid "gang fight", someone stabbed him.
Years later his mother is still putting flowers on the road where he died, and every so often manages to get herself into the local rag on some pretext or other to do with it.
Grieve, by all means, but you're just one of a million people in the world that was bereaved that week. Why must the rest of us be forced to be interested?
My family are under strict instructions if anything untimely happens to me, no public flowers. Have some dignity, grieve in private, not out loud.
Gain brownie points with Mrs Ari by bringing her a fresh bunch of flowers on a regular basis!
Extra bonus points for giving Ari juniors a new teddy every week!
The Diana band wagon jumping was a national embarresment IMO
The morning she died I got a b
king from my mrs cos I said at least we wont have to be hearing about her every fking 5 minutes. IMO she was a fking retarded manipulative mental case.
Similar ste over the fking retarded racist Jade goody ,well there are now words to express how fking annoyed I was.
They still talk about her legacy, give me strength.
The morning she died I got a b
king from my mrs cos I said at least we wont have to be hearing about her every fking 5 minutes. IMO she was a fking retarded manipulative mental case.Similar s
te over the fking retarded racist Jade goody ,well there are now words to express how fking annoyed I was.They still talk about her legacy, give me strength.
It's media-driven social conformity. People have this urge to be seen to be doing good and thereby find common ground with their peer group. It has nothing to do with empathy in most cases, because if it did it's unlikely it would coincide with the front-page story of a tragedy involving a very attractive or otherwise remarkable person. I bet half of those who partake in these altruistic frenzies have someone much more in need of help living in their own street. Don't get me wrong, it's none of my business who people weep about and how they spend their money, but I do object to the stigma attached to saying, "I don't give two fks."
ks."bhstewie said:
hstewie said: I find my Mum does something very similar where she'll tell me that her friend Doreen's hairdresser's brother has died and will look at me as if there's something wrong with me when I simply say "Oh" rather than start asking questions.
Jesus, has he? I'll set up a tribute page on Facebook.Twincam16 said:
I agree.
I think a lot of it seems to stem from an encouragement to de-emotionalise our lives. Few people seem to act on principle or out of integrity any more. To some, life is a lazy, done-for-them, laze-o-matic loaf where newspapers give them their opinions, food comes out of the microwave, everything is automated and computerised and the TV orders you to stop thinking.
The gutted shells of people that modern culture leaves behind, if they lack the reasoning skills to work out what it's doing to them to combat it, feel the need to demonstrate that they're still functioning human beings to others by gushing out overwrought proxy emotions at all and sundry, and demand validation from others.
Wearing your heart on your sleeve seems to have become a way of proving to others that you have emotions of any sort anyway. It's also manifested in the mawkish tattoo culture whereby people seem to think that every single thing that matters to them must be carved into their skin in ever-more noticeable places (the latest trend seems to be kids' names right behind the ears). Not for their benefit, but for yours: 'LOOK, I AM HUMAN! I HAVE FEELINGS! LOOK AT ME HAVING FEELINGS! VALIDATE ME!'
In a world where every burp and belch is broadcast on Facebook it seems that if you aren't marketing your feelings to others, then 'officially' you don't have any at all.
It's a shameful state of affairs, a mass cultural malaise that's really got its claws into British society, and it needs actively reversing, not dejected defeatism while it continues to fester.
Bloody well said!I think a lot of it seems to stem from an encouragement to de-emotionalise our lives. Few people seem to act on principle or out of integrity any more. To some, life is a lazy, done-for-them, laze-o-matic loaf where newspapers give them their opinions, food comes out of the microwave, everything is automated and computerised and the TV orders you to stop thinking.
The gutted shells of people that modern culture leaves behind, if they lack the reasoning skills to work out what it's doing to them to combat it, feel the need to demonstrate that they're still functioning human beings to others by gushing out overwrought proxy emotions at all and sundry, and demand validation from others.
Wearing your heart on your sleeve seems to have become a way of proving to others that you have emotions of any sort anyway. It's also manifested in the mawkish tattoo culture whereby people seem to think that every single thing that matters to them must be carved into their skin in ever-more noticeable places (the latest trend seems to be kids' names right behind the ears). Not for their benefit, but for yours: 'LOOK, I AM HUMAN! I HAVE FEELINGS! LOOK AT ME HAVING FEELINGS! VALIDATE ME!'
In a world where every burp and belch is broadcast on Facebook it seems that if you aren't marketing your feelings to others, then 'officially' you don't have any at all.
It's a shameful state of affairs, a mass cultural malaise that's really got its claws into British society, and it needs actively reversing, not dejected defeatism while it continues to fester.
[5 years on]Pesty said:
The Diana band wagon jumping was a national embarresment IMO
The morning she died I got a bking from my mrs cos I said at least we wont have to be hearing about her every fking 5 minutes. IMO she was a fking retarded manipulative mental case.
I thought it was sad that they had that concert for Princess Diana I mean she didnt have much to do with pop music , they should have have done something that celebrated what was really great about her life … like staging a gang bang in a minefield.The morning she died I got a b
king from my mrs cos I said at least we wont have to be hearing about her every fking 5 minutes. IMO she was a fking retarded manipulative mental case.The nation's girlfiend.
Pesty said:
The Diana band wagon jumping was a national embarresment IMO
The morning she died I got a bking from my mrs cos I said at least we wont have to be hearing about her every fking 5 minutes. IMO she was a fking retarded manipulative mental case.
I thought it was sad that they had that concert for Princess Diana I mean she didnt have much to do with pop music , they should have have done something that celebrated what was really great about her life … like staging a gang bang in a minefield.The morning she died I got a b
king from my mrs cos I said at least we wont have to be hearing about her every fking 5 minutes. IMO she was a fking retarded manipulative mental case.The nation's girlfiend.
Acehood said:
I can barely bring myself to get emotional about people I know in real life dying - I just don't see the point getting upset at all. Doesn't help me and certainly won't bring anyone back from the dead.
"Celebs" or random people I don't know? I couldn't give less of a fk if I tried.
I recall a news story a few years ago about a young soldier dying in Iraq. It was near Christmas and he had left a young family. I sent a cheque directly to her to enable presents to be bought for the kids. I wasn't emotional about it, other than feeling great sympathy for his familys' situation. "Celebs" or random people I don't know? I couldn't give less of a f
k if I tried.Certainly wouldn't bring him back and perhaps it was a ridiculous thing to do.
I imagine there are millions acts of small charity towards strangers - I hope so.
I only mention this to give a contrasting view.
I mentioned this on the other thread about the runner but most the seemed in favour of....well, not discussing this side of the issue.
The girls death is horrible...but so is any death like that. The reason so much money has been raised is a bizarre mix of "missing white girl syndrome", post Diana public shows of grief, an xfactor esque love of gathering behind an individual to make them something far grander and the current social media age.
If you removed any one of those aspects and this wouldn't happen.
The way some people are watching the total on just giving tick upwards is more in keeping with seeing if Simon Cowells latest group are getting the number one Xmas spot.
Still, great for the Samaritans....financially. And seems the parents are viewing it positively.
The girls death is horrible...but so is any death like that. The reason so much money has been raised is a bizarre mix of "missing white girl syndrome", post Diana public shows of grief, an xfactor esque love of gathering behind an individual to make them something far grander and the current social media age.
If you removed any one of those aspects and this wouldn't happen.
The way some people are watching the total on just giving tick upwards is more in keeping with seeing if Simon Cowells latest group are getting the number one Xmas spot.
Still, great for the Samaritans....financially. And seems the parents are viewing it positively.
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