Discussion
I haven't lost a parent yet but my brother died in a motorcycle crash three months before my wedding. he was due to be best man, he was my sons God father we did everything together. he'll be two years gone in September. I don't think it gets easier of such I think we adapt and find different ways of coping and although it may seem strange but certain things and situations will feel like they were their at that moment. your own memories and habits will be your comfort. I find silly trivial things comforting. at my wedding we didn't make a big song and dance out of his passing. I just had an empty seat beside me at the top table with a pint of Heineken in front. anytime I go for a drink I stick a pint on the bar for him. I still haven't had the courage to throw my leg over a bike again. time is not a healer but it certainly does get easier
3 months is no time at all. I'm hardly talking form a position of huge experience having lost my dad about 10 months ago but I think going though a huge life even is compounding things for you. I had my driveway done a few weeks back and found myself thinking about how I wanted to tell my old man or get his advice. He worked in construction and I'd always talk to him about things like that. My point is if its something you associate with them or its important of course you'll want to share it with them or think about them. That does dredge feelings up I still think about mine nearly every day regardless.
With your events being so close things have probably played into one another and made things a lot worse. One day at a time. Get the wedding done and I'm sure it will start to ease and you can come to terms with things a bit more.
I'm sure you'll do him proud.
With your events being so close things have probably played into one another and made things a lot worse. One day at a time. Get the wedding done and I'm sure it will start to ease and you can come to terms with things a bit more.
I'm sure you'll do him proud.
Landlord said:
When you lose someone you immediately have this gaping hole in your life. Only this hole is sharp and pointed. Every moment it jabs you and you feel intense pain. Time doesn't fill this hole but it rounds off the points so that, whilst they're still there and uncomfortable, they no longer hurt in the same way.
.
Never seen that quote before but it is a really good description..
OP 3 months on and everything is still going to be raw.
My Dad died over 15 years ago and I still miss him. Not every day and not as intensely. I don't think that will ever go away.
Good luck on Friday
grumpy52 said:
Good luck with your wedding , your dad will be there ,he will be in the hearts of all those that loved him .
I like that quote.I lost my dad just over a year ago and still can't believe it at times. I wish I had made more time to see him and speak to him on the phone.
That was quite hard to write.
We knew ours was going for a while, he had cancer & was in the hospice. When the time was near, we planned a birthday celebration, knowing it would be his last but he passed away at 8am on his birthday, before any of us could get there.
So, since it comes to us all sooner or later, if there's anything that needs saying, get it said before it's too late.
So, since it comes to us all sooner or later, if there's anything that needs saying, get it said before it's too late.
My dad died unexpectedly Christmas eve 2014; went to bed on the 23rd and didn't wake up, he was only 65.
He lived two roads away and I saw him at least 3 times a week, I still miss him daily.
It does get easier but I still have the odd moment, usually when I've been drinking or hear a choir (he loved a choir) singing.
3 months is no time but it will get easier, trust me.
He lived two roads away and I saw him at least 3 times a week, I still miss him daily.
It does get easier but I still have the odd moment, usually when I've been drinking or hear a choir (he loved a choir) singing.
3 months is no time but it will get easier, trust me.
Have an amazing day on Friday; you will miss your Dad and there will be times when it will hurt, but reflect the day would have bought him great happiness, and he will want you to have a day of great happiness too. He will be there in spirit, just think of him being in the next room.
Dad went in Jan 1986.
When i am working on the car, i still want to ring him up for some help, despite me being 70!!!!!!
Now with the grandkids along, both me and Mrs fox often say, i wish they were still here to see them.
I am pleased i still remember them both even now.It shows just how much they were loved.
Stick in mate it takes time and the changes are gradual,but never forget them.
Enjoy your day
When i am working on the car, i still want to ring him up for some help, despite me being 70!!!!!!
Now with the grandkids along, both me and Mrs fox often say, i wish they were still here to see them.
I am pleased i still remember them both even now.It shows just how much they were loved.
Stick in mate it takes time and the changes are gradual,but never forget them.
Enjoy your day
Some moving thoughts and quotes here and OP you have my sincere sympathies and I know it is a tough time for you and your family.
My Dad died nearly 4 years ago and not a day goes by without me thinking about him and missing him. However I would say that I was blessed that he was my father as he was a wonderful and much loved man.
I focus on how lucky I have been and all the happy memories of him. It doesn't take the pain away but it does make me feel happy and positive. As you miss your dad so much he too must have been a wonderful father. That has to be a positive in the circumstances.
It will get better as others have said and I would say that your feelings just now are completely normal so please don't think otherwise.
My Dad died nearly 4 years ago and not a day goes by without me thinking about him and missing him. However I would say that I was blessed that he was my father as he was a wonderful and much loved man.
I focus on how lucky I have been and all the happy memories of him. It doesn't take the pain away but it does make me feel happy and positive. As you miss your dad so much he too must have been a wonderful father. That has to be a positive in the circumstances.
It will get better as others have said and I would say that your feelings just now are completely normal so please don't think otherwise.
My dad died in the late 90s. I don't remember the exact date because it just doesn't matter. Its like a huge hole that will never be filled. Its a stupid phrase but I feel 'broken'. I can get so emotional about the stupidest thing now. I never did before. Car SOS for example always brings a few tears because that handover of the car is so touching and means so much. Perhaps its normal, I don't know.
I've posted before about my dad - 25 years ago this year, suddenly and with no warning, at the age of 44 (I was 15). Still miss him, still think about him, still think about how much he's missed out on and how much I've missed out on with him and my kids.
It's natural to think about him - It's natural. I wouldn't necessarily say it gets easier, but it does get different - Don't dwell on it and live your life the way he'd have expected you to - Use that thought to get yourself through. That's what he'd have wanted.
It's natural to think about him - It's natural. I wouldn't necessarily say it gets easier, but it does get different - Don't dwell on it and live your life the way he'd have expected you to - Use that thought to get yourself through. That's what he'd have wanted.
Eddie Strohacker said:
We knew ours was going for a while, he had cancer & was in the hospice. When the time was near, we planned a birthday celebration, knowing it would be his last but he passed away at 8am on his birthday, before any of us could get there.
So, since it comes to us all sooner or later, if there's anything that needs saying, get it said before it's too late.
My dad died on his birthday , for some reason I had a brain freeze on dates and rang him 2 days early , so I said I'd ring him back on the 15th to wish him happy birthday again , we had a laugh about itSo, since it comes to us all sooner or later, if there's anything that needs saying, get it said before it's too late.
That was the last time I spoke to him , I got the call from my sister around 9am to say he'd gone , the funeral director said 30 years in the job and he could count on one hand the people that had died on their birthday .
Mind you he had a strange way with clients , as we were leaving he shook my hand and said, see you soon
I hope not
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