Any other expectant Dads?
Discussion
8bit said:
vaud said:
As I say, zero filters. Thankfully they grow out of it and then start asking questions like, "when are you going to die daddy?"
Yeah our eldest has started asking about that a lot over the past year or so. His best pal's grandad passed away just over a year ago which seemed to prompt it. He asked me the other night, "Are you older than mummy?" - No, I'm a year younger than her - "does that mean she'll die before you?".He's five and a half, while we're on the subject I'm open to suggestions as to how to talk to him about this, other than simple reassurance.
Feirny said:
Just typing this as I need to try and get my head round it, and writing it down should help and this thread seems appropriate. So feel free to glaze over it.
My daughter was born yesterday lunchtime, OH had a traumatic labour and they ended up getting the forceps out. OH blood pressure kept dropping yesterday so she was out of it and didn’t get to spend any time with new born. Then about 6pm the (amazingly excellent) midwives noticed babies breathing was a bit off, and she was whisked off to Neo Natal and spent the night in intensive care where I went between there and OH on labour ward. We initially came in on Tuesday when OH called me at work to say she didn’t feel well, and there was a small bleed. So I’ve been awake since 5am Tuesday and trying to keep it together for the both of them.
Baby is now doing a lot better and is out of intensive care on a high dependency unit, I took the OH down to see her for the first time properly and let her have all the hugs and contact she needed.
I’ve got no idea when to go home and how long for, I’m just in survival mode looking after the two of them.
Other than that, I’m fine ha.
Congratulations! Sounds like everything has headed in the right direction after your initial drama and as said, they're in the right place!My daughter was born yesterday lunchtime, OH had a traumatic labour and they ended up getting the forceps out. OH blood pressure kept dropping yesterday so she was out of it and didn’t get to spend any time with new born. Then about 6pm the (amazingly excellent) midwives noticed babies breathing was a bit off, and she was whisked off to Neo Natal and spent the night in intensive care where I went between there and OH on labour ward. We initially came in on Tuesday when OH called me at work to say she didn’t feel well, and there was a small bleed. So I’ve been awake since 5am Tuesday and trying to keep it together for the both of them.
Baby is now doing a lot better and is out of intensive care on a high dependency unit, I took the OH down to see her for the first time properly and let her have all the hugs and contact she needed.
I’ve got no idea when to go home and how long for, I’m just in survival mode looking after the two of them.
Other than that, I’m fine ha.
As for the "when to go home bit", my concerns were insignificant compared to yours so I won't pretend to fully understand, but I did spend a couple of really late nights (3-4am) to be back for opening times at 9:30 again and it just did none of us any good. I would have been far better getting a good night sleep, sorting out some supply runs and coming back fresh... I would have annoyed the midwives less too....
All easier said than done though when your missus and new baby are both in hospital. Good luck, it'll seem like you're in there forever but in a couple of weeks you'll have (almost) forgotten about it
SpeckledJim said:
Watch the Lion King with him and talk him through the tough bits.
Then call him Simba for a while.
Or Moana when her grandma dies, that works for us.Then call him Simba for a while.
Or answering the question 'where did naughty Gaston go?' When he falls off the tower.
Or what happens to Gothel / flynn in tangled.
Or Elsa's parents on the ship.
Blimey there's a lot of death in Disney.
We’re here for another 4-5 days, baby has Strep B but they caught it at 6 hours old and was straight on anti biotics so that was lucky. She had to have a Lumbar Puncture today as well. What I find amazing is, is that at 3 days old she’s barely moaning about all the medical staff constantly pricking her, taking blood etc. She just lets them get on with it.
Feirny said:
Just typing this as I need to try and get my head round it, and writing it down should help and this thread seems appropriate. So feel free to glaze over it.
My daughter was born yesterday lunchtime, OH had a traumatic labour and they ended up getting the forceps out. OH blood pressure kept dropping yesterday so she was out of it and didn’t get to spend any time with new born. Then about 6pm the (amazingly excellent) midwives noticed babies breathing was a bit off, and she was whisked off to Neo Natal and spent the night in intensive care where I went between there and OH on labour ward. We initially came in on Tuesday when OH called me at work to say she didn’t feel well, and there was a small bleed. So I’ve been awake since 5am Tuesday and trying to keep it together for the both of them.
Baby is now doing a lot better and is out of intensive care on a high dependency unit, I took the OH down to see her for the first time properly and let her have all the hugs and contact she needed.
I’ve got no idea when to go home and how long for, I’m just in survival mode looking after the two of them.
Other than that, I’m fine ha.
Sounds like you are having an awful timeMy daughter was born yesterday lunchtime, OH had a traumatic labour and they ended up getting the forceps out. OH blood pressure kept dropping yesterday so she was out of it and didn’t get to spend any time with new born. Then about 6pm the (amazingly excellent) midwives noticed babies breathing was a bit off, and she was whisked off to Neo Natal and spent the night in intensive care where I went between there and OH on labour ward. We initially came in on Tuesday when OH called me at work to say she didn’t feel well, and there was a small bleed. So I’ve been awake since 5am Tuesday and trying to keep it together for the both of them.
Baby is now doing a lot better and is out of intensive care on a high dependency unit, I took the OH down to see her for the first time properly and let her have all the hugs and contact she needed.
I’ve got no idea when to go home and how long for, I’m just in survival mode looking after the two of them.
Other than that, I’m fine ha.
From very recent personal experience with Sophie who is six weeks old on Monday coming you need to go home, sleep and try to do something normal..
Sophie was in hospital for 2 weeks, lots shorter than the original 6-7 week estimate but even after 2 weeks my head was absolutely done in to the point I was no good to anyone, 12 hours plus a day at hospital while doing nothing else but eating and trying to sleep is not good for you.
You will have probably mentally had enough long before you realise so you need to look after yourself. You are no good to both of them if you end up going wibble. I think I was fairly close!
Good luck to you all.
ED209 said:
Sounds like you are having an awful time
From very recent personal experience with Sophie who is six weeks old on Monday coming you need to go home, sleep and try to do something normal..
Sophie was in hospital for 2 weeks, lots shorter than the original 6-7 week estimate but even after 2 weeks my head was absolutely done in to the point I was no good to anyone, 12 hours plus a day at hospital while doing nothing else but eating and trying to sleep is not good for you.
You will have probably mentally had enough long before you realise so you need to look after yourself. You are no good to both of them if you end up going wibble. I think I was fairly close!
Good luck to you all.
Thanks. I’m trying to do pretty much what you’ve just said, but twice I’ve got as far as the car park before turning around.From very recent personal experience with Sophie who is six weeks old on Monday coming you need to go home, sleep and try to do something normal..
Sophie was in hospital for 2 weeks, lots shorter than the original 6-7 week estimate but even after 2 weeks my head was absolutely done in to the point I was no good to anyone, 12 hours plus a day at hospital while doing nothing else but eating and trying to sleep is not good for you.
You will have probably mentally had enough long before you realise so you need to look after yourself. You are no good to both of them if you end up going wibble. I think I was fairly close!
Good luck to you all.
I don’t think it helps in that the drove to hospital could be 20mins or 90mins depending on what time of day it is.
Feirny said:
Thanks. I’m trying to do pretty much what you’ve just said, but twice I’ve got as far as the car park before turning around.
I don’t think it helps in that the drove to hospital could be 20mins or 90mins depending on what time of day it is.
I almost did similar a few times on the way home from the hospital. Each time I pulled over, had a cry then a word with myself and managed to get home. It’s not easy though and I still have no idea if cracking on was the right thing to do or not. I don’t think it helps in that the drove to hospital could be 20mins or 90mins depending on what time of day it is.
We were fairly lucky in that the hospital is 10 miles straight down an A road from our front door. About a 15 min drive if we avoided peak times. Sometimes it took longer to get into the car park than drive to the hospital. We did get a free parking pass to ease the burden a bit though in the situation as it was I would have paid £100 a day to park if I had to.
t just got real! Although she is now getting a little fed up and just wants him out of there so she can carry on with her life, albeit slightly differently 
Feirny said:
We’re here for another 4-5 days, baby has Strep B but they caught it at 6 hours old and was straight on anti biotics so that was lucky. She had to have a Lumbar Puncture today as well. What I find amazing is, is that at 3 days old she’s barely moaning about all the medical staff constantly pricking her, taking blood etc. She just lets them get on with it.
i find it amazing that they don't routinely test for group B strep given how dangerous it can be and how easy the test is. Glad it's under control.Gassing Station | The Lounge | Top of Page | What's New | My Stuff