Post up your favourite poem

[thenetwork]

Started out as a limerick creator

Then I worked as regulator translator

I had no idea what I was doing

But I was keen to keep pursuing

And all this made me into a great debater ...

[Stealthracer]

The limerick, peculiar to English,
Is a verse form that's hard to extinguish.
Once Parliament, in session,
Decreed its suppression.
But people got around it by writing the last line without any rhyme or metre.

[otolith]

Stealthracer said:

The limerick, peculiar to English,
Is a verse form that's hard to extinguish.
Once Parliament, in session,
Decreed its suppression.
But people got around it by writing the last line without any rhyme or metre.

[Byker28i]

Voldemort said:

ferret50 said:

Check just one page back!

You do realise that more than one person can have the same favourite poem, right?

Nah it's a fair shout, but we were talking war poets and that popped to mind...

[mac96]

rowley birkin said:

John Cooper Clarke: "tt!"

Like a nightclub in the morning, you're the bitter end
Like a recently disinfected sthouse, you're clean round the bend
You give me the horrors
Too bad to be true
All of my tomorrows
Are lousy 'cause of you
You put the Shat in Shatter
Put the Pain in Spain
Your germs are splattered about
Your face is just a stain
You're certainly no raver, commonly known as a drag
Do us all a favor, here, wear this polythene bag
You're like a dose of scabies
I've got you under my skin
You make life a fairytale
Grimm!
People mention murder, the moment you arrive
I'd consider killing you if I thought you were alive
You've got this slippery quality
It makes me think of phlegm
And a dual personality
I hate both of them
You're bad breath, vamps disease, destruction, and decay
Please, please, please, please, take yourself away
Like a death a birthday party
You ruin all the fun
Like a sucked and spat-our Smartie
You're no use to anyone
Like the shadow of the guillotine
On a dead consumptive's face
Speaking as an outsider
What do you think of the human race?
You went to a progressive psychiatrist
He recommended suicide
Before scratching your bad name off his list
And pointing the way outside
You hear laughter breaking through, it makes you want to fart
You're heading for a breakdown
Better pull yourself apart
Your dirty name gets passed about when something goes amiss
Your attitudes are platitudes
Just make me wanna piss
What kind of creature bore you
Was it some kind of bat?
They can't find a good word for you
But I can
tt!

Never heard or read that, thank you it is wonderful! You can hear JCC's voice all through it.

[otolith]

mac96 said:

Never heard or read that, thank you it is wonderful! You can hear JCC's voice all through it.

Can hear it for real here!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g-aVtKEhpO0

[mac96]

otolith said:

mac96 said:

Never heard or read that, thank you it is wonderful! You can hear JCC's voice all through it.

Can hear it for real here!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g-aVtKEhpO0

Thank you too, excellent.

[witteringon]

Goodbye Worn Out Morris 1000

Oh love you got no poke left
I didn't want to say
It seems we are outmoded
Much too slow, and in the way
You know how much I love you
I'd repair you in a flash
But I haven't got the knowledge
And I haven't got the cash

There's rust all round your headlamps
I could push through if I tried
My pot of paint can't cure it
Cause it's from the other side
All along your sides and middle
You are turning rusty brown
Though you took me ninety thousand miles
And never let me down

Not the snapping of a fan belt
Not the blowing of a tyre
Not the rattling of a tappet
And nor did you misfire
All your wheels stayed on the corners
And the wipers on the screen
Though I didn't do much for you
And I never kept you clean

All your seats are unupholstered
And foam rubber flecks the floor
You were hit by something else once
And I cannot shut the door
But it's not those things that grieve me
Or the money that I spent
For you were my first driver
Ninety thousand miles we went

I could buy a bright and new car
And go tearing round the town
A BGT! A Morgan!
(with the hood all battened down)
But as I leave you in the scrapyard
Bangers piled up to the skies
Why do your rusty headlamps
Look like sad, reproachful eyes?


Pam Ayres

[Typhoo]

When they got to about the age of 11 or 12 years,my late Father took great delight teaching his Grandchildren this..

Little mouse upon the wall
Have you no family at all ?
No Mother ? No Father ?
bd !!

[Huff]

witteringon said:

Goodbye Worn Out Morris 1000

Oh love you got no poke left
I didn't want to say
It seems we are outmoded
Much too slow, and in the way
You know how much I love you
I'd repair you in a flash
But I haven't got the knowledge
And I haven't got the cash

There's rust all round your headlamps
I could push through if I tried
My pot of paint can't cure it
Cause it's from the other side
All along your sides and middle
You are turning rusty brown
Though you took me ninety thousand miles
And never let me down

Not the snapping of a fan belt
Not the blowing of a tyre
Not the rattling of a tappet
And nor did you misfire
All your wheels stayed on the corners
And the wipers on the screen
Though I didn't do much for you
And I never kept you clean

All your seats are unupholstered
And foam rubber flecks the floor
You were hit by something else once
And I cannot shut the door
But it's not those things that grieve me
Or the money that I spent
For you were my first driver
Ninety thousand miles we went

I could buy a bright and new car
And go tearing round the town
A BGT! A Morgan!
(with the hood all battened down)
But as I leave you in the scrapyard
Bangers piled up to the skies
Why do your rusty headlamps
Look like sad, reproachful eyes?


Pam Ayres

[bad company]

Spike Milligan:-

There are many diseases,
That strike people's kneeses,
Scorflufus! is one by name
It comes from the East
Packed in bladders of yeast
So the Chinese must take half the blame.

There's a case in the files
Of Sir Barrington-Pyles
While hunting a fox one day
Shot up in the air
And remained hanging there!
While the hairs on his socks turned grey!

Aye!Scorflufus had struck!
At man, beast, and duck.
And the knees of the world went Bong!
Some knees went Ping!
Other knees turned to string
From Balham to old Hong Kong.

Should you hold your life dear,
Then the remedy's clear,
If you're offered some yeast - don't eat it!
Turn the offer down flat-
Don your travelling hat-
Put an egg in your boot - and beat it!

[Stealthracer]

The limerick's an art form complex
Whose contents run chiefly to sex.
It's famous for virgins
And masculine urgin's
Plus vulgar erotic effects.

[Huff]

As for limericks - easy to make crude - Nobody imo has ever matched Edward Lear for sheer wonderful (& Victorian) silliness -

There was an Old Man in a tree,
Who was horribly bored by a Bee;
When they said, 'Does it buzz?'
He replied, 'Yes, it does!'
'It's a regular brute of a Bee!'

( here's a link to them all, alongside the joys of the Jumblies, and all -else - with his wonderful pen illustrations: https://www.nonsenselit.org/Lear/index.html )

[Stealthracer]

The limerick packs laughs astronomical
Into space that is quite economical.
But the good ones we've seen
So seldom are clean,
And the clean ones are not often comical.


(I'm not sure my memory is right about the 'astronomical' in the first line; it might be 'anatomical'!)

[thenetwork]

[] God Save Our Clown []


God save our useless Clown...
Don't put the rest of us down...
And let us have all your hand maidens ...
But don't give us any old trade-ins...
As we are so joyous now...
Let us be happy somehow...
And God will save your rear end...
And you can be our forever friend...

Then let us then drink your wine...
So this will give us a sign...
That you can reign over us...
Without any fuss...
May you defend our laws...
And ever give us good cause...
So that we can sing...
God save your Ring.

[thenetwork]

[] the beginning []

won't you come along with me

and you will be able to see

that climate change is here to stay

and it will be with us night and day

we did not heed the advice

and now we will pay the price

floods droughts cold and heat

it will be right there in your street

it's now too late to make a change

the statistics are out of their range

our governments were lying

and now people are dying

what message does this send

that we have reached a dead end

but can we pull back from the brink

if we just stop and think

[] the end []​

[Desiderata]

Given my username, obviously this one:-


Go placidly amid the noise and the haste, and remember what peace there may be in silence. As far as possible, without surrender, be on good terms with all persons.

Speak your truth quietly and clearly; and listen to others, even to the dull and the ignorant; they too have their story.

Avoid loud and aggressive persons; they are vexatious to the spirit. If you compare yourself with others, you may become vain or bitter, for always there will be greater and lesser persons than yourself.

Enjoy your achievements as well as your plans. Keep interested in your own career, however humble; it is a real possession in the changing fortunes of time.

Exercise caution in your business affairs, for the world is full of trickery. But let this not blind you to what virtue there is; many persons strive for high ideals, and everywhere life is full of heroism.

Be yourself. Especially do not feign affection. Neither be cynical about love; for in the face of all aridity and disenchantment, it is as perennial as the grass.

Take kindly the counsel of the years, gracefully surrendering the things of youth.

Nurture strength of spirit to shield you in sudden misfortune. But do not distress yourself with dark imaginings. Many fears are born of fatigue and loneliness.

Beyond a wholesome discipline, be gentle with yourself. You are a child of the universe no less than the trees and the stars; you have a right to be here.

And whether or not it is clear to you, no doubt the universe is unfolding as it should. Therefore be at peace with God, whatever you conceive Him to be. And whatever your labors and aspirations, in the noisy confusion of life, keep peace in your soul. With all its sham, drudgery and broken dreams, it is still a beautiful world. Be cheerful. Strive to be happy.

by Max Ehrmann ©1927

[Dbag101]

I never saw a Purple Cow,
I never hope to see one;
But I can tell you, anyhow,
I’d rather see than be one.

[Dbag101]

Near a shady wall a rose once grew,
Budded and blossomed in God's free light,
Watered and fed by morning dew,
Shedding its sweetness day and night.

As it grew and blossomed fair and tall,
Slowly rising to loftier height,
It came to a crevice in the wall,
Through which there shone a beam of light.

Onward it crept with added strength,
With never a thought of fear or pride.
It followed the light through the crevice's length
And unfolded itself on the other side.

The light, the dew, the broadening view
Were found the same as they were before;
And it lost itself in beauties new,
Breathing its fragrance more and more.

Shall claim of death cause us to grieve,
And make our courage faint or fail?
Nay! Let us faith and hope receive:
The rose still grows beyond the wall.

Scattering fragrance far and wide,
Just as it did in days of yore,
Just as it did on the other side,
Just as it will for evermore.

[Stick Legs]

Meditation on the A30.

A man on his own in a car,
is revenging himself on his wife,
he opens that throttle and bubbles with dottle,
and puffs as his pitiful life,

She's losing her looks very fast,
She loses her temper each day;
that lorry won't let me get past,
this Mini is blocking my way,

"Oh why can't you step on it, SHIFT HER!"
I can't go on crawling like this!
At breakfast she said that she wished I were dead-
thank heavens we don't have to kiss.

I'd like a nice blonde on my knee,
one who won't argue or nag,
Who dares come a hooting at me?
I only give way to a Jag!

You're barmy or plastered, I'll pass you you bd-
I will overtake you I will!
As he clenches his pipe, his moment is ripe,
and the corner's accepting it's kill.

Sir John Betjeman.

Edited by Stick Legs on Saturday 15th March 15:27