Sean Connery Joke Thread (Vol 9)
Discussion
A horse is in the pub having a few pints when he spots a donkey in the corner. He nips over to have a natter, donkey asks "what did you do for a living" and the horse replies "I ran on the flat in the summer and over the jumps in the winter", donkey says "I worked with the kids on blackpool beach" and follows up with "did you win anything?"
The horse nods "yeah on the flat I won the Oaks, St. Leger and the Derby and over the jumps I won the Grand National and the Gold Cup”. They arrange to meet at the donkey's house a week later and donkey decides that he has to impress the champion horse.
He buys a big picture of a zebra and hangs it above the fireplace. When he horse arrives, he says "lovely place you have here and who's that in the picture on the wall?" the donkey replies "thats me when I played for Juventus"
The horse nods "yeah on the flat I won the Oaks, St. Leger and the Derby and over the jumps I won the Grand National and the Gold Cup”. They arrange to meet at the donkey's house a week later and donkey decides that he has to impress the champion horse.
He buys a big picture of a zebra and hangs it above the fireplace. When he horse arrives, he says "lovely place you have here and who's that in the picture on the wall?" the donkey replies "thats me when I played for Juventus"
fatboy18 said:
My German girlfriend likes to rate our sex between 1-10.
Last night we tried anal, she kept shouting 9!
That’s the best I’ve done so far.
Then they went to the pub, she said "Sit down Ill get them in"Last night we tried anal, she kept shouting 9!
That’s the best I’ve done so far.
She said to the barman "Two sherries please"
He said "Dry"
She said "No two".
stuartmmcfc said:
Evangelion said:
55palfers said:
... the donkey replies "thats me when I played for Juventus" ...
Seeing as the donkey was from Blackpool, wouldn't Newcastle United have been more plausible?That’s a bit like a guy saying, “I slept with Michelle Keegan”, and one of his friends saying, “Well, I did Sarah Millican”, and the other saying, “Yeah? I did Jo Brand.”
Frank7 said:
stuartmmcfc said:
Evangelion said:
55palfers said:
... the donkey replies "thats me when I played for Juventus" ...
Seeing as the donkey was from Blackpool, wouldn't Newcastle United have been more plausible?That’s a bit like a guy saying, “I slept with Michelle Keegan”, and one of his friends saying, “Well, I did Sarah Millican”, and the other saying, “Yeah? I did Jo Brand.”
Evangelion said:
55palfers said:
... the donkey replies "thats me when I played for Juventus" ...
Seeing as the donkey was from Blackpool, wouldn't Newcastle United have been more plausible?That would work, without any bickering or dissecting of little furry young felines...
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