Living with a woman - good idea?
Discussion
I can't see the point. Just keep them at arm's length or, as others have said, you move in with them but keep your own property. There's far too many who go 'mental' - this simply balances out any initial enthusiasm that you may feel.
In all honesty, if you haven't found a woman to live with after all these years you really will struggle to cope with their habits/moods/families/needs/paranoia etc
In all honesty, if you haven't found a woman to live with after all these years you really will struggle to cope with their habits/moods/families/needs/paranoia etc
steveatesh said:
Curious as to the specifics on how the “right one will enhance your life a lot”?
What will he gain that he doesn’t have now?
What will he lose that he has now?
What new opportunities will he have with such a woman that he doesn’t have now?
What threats and risks will he have to contend with that he doesn’t now?
I suppose only he can answer the questions, and ultimately decide if the risk is worth taking.
From friends experience I see much greater risks in his proposal than gains and opportunities, after all there is not much a single man can’t have if he is well resourced, compared to a man in a relationship who has to compromise and probably give a lot up for.
As above, get a dog instead.
Brilliant!What will he gain that he doesn’t have now?
What will he lose that he has now?
What new opportunities will he have with such a woman that he doesn’t have now?
What threats and risks will he have to contend with that he doesn’t now?
I suppose only he can answer the questions, and ultimately decide if the risk is worth taking.
From friends experience I see much greater risks in his proposal than gains and opportunities, after all there is not much a single man can’t have if he is well resourced, compared to a man in a relationship who has to compromise and probably give a lot up for.
As above, get a dog instead.
You literally can’t beat PH for these kind of views.
I suppose if you treat it like some obscure kind of financial investment/risk strategy from the offset it will be bound to fail. If however you’re a human being it’s much more simple. Do you want to spend much more time with this woman, and possibly be prepared to take and share some of their/your lesser favourable traits. If so then living together should work out nicely.
If you have no interest in that and can’t see any benefit then it’s a very obvious no.
rufusgti said:
steveatesh said:
Curious as to the specifics on how the “right one will enhance your life a lot”?
What will he gain that he doesn’t have now?
What will he lose that he has now?
What new opportunities will he have with such a woman that he doesn’t have now?
What threats and risks will he have to contend with that he doesn’t now?
I suppose only he can answer the questions, and ultimately decide if the risk is worth taking.
From friends experience I see much greater risks in his proposal than gains and opportunities, after all there is not much a single man can’t have if he is well resourced, compared to a man in a relationship who has to compromise and probably give a lot up for.
As above, get a dog instead.
Brilliant!What will he gain that he doesn’t have now?
What will he lose that he has now?
What new opportunities will he have with such a woman that he doesn’t have now?
What threats and risks will he have to contend with that he doesn’t now?
I suppose only he can answer the questions, and ultimately decide if the risk is worth taking.
From friends experience I see much greater risks in his proposal than gains and opportunities, after all there is not much a single man can’t have if he is well resourced, compared to a man in a relationship who has to compromise and probably give a lot up for.
As above, get a dog instead.
You literally can’t beat PH for these kind of views.
I suppose if you treat it like some obscure kind of financial investment/risk strategy from the offset it will be bound to fail. If however you’re a human being it’s much more simple. Do you want to spend much more time with this woman, and possibly be prepared to take and share some of their/your lesser favourable traits. If so then living together should work out nicely.
If you have no interest in that and can’t see any benefit then it’s a very obvious no.
PurpleMoonlight said:
You move in with her, not her with you.
Your rent out your property.
Do not by a property jointly,
Do not marry.
Otherwise, enjoy.
I get the ‘do not marry’ and ‘do not buy a property jointly’ to some extent, guess it would make it harder to unwind things if it didn’t work out. Your rent out your property.
Do not by a property jointly,
Do not marry.
Otherwise, enjoy.
But why does it matter who moves into who’s property?
KrazyIvan said:
You want a well rounded, down to earth, good looking, intelligent middle age women, who isn't a psycho and presumably without out a lot of baggage..........good look with your search, I think you might need it.
Everyone has baggage at this age, something wrong if they haven’t. KrazyIvan said:
You want a well rounded, down to earth, good looking, intelligent middle age women, who isn't a psycho and presumably without out a lot of baggage..........good look with your search, I think you might need it.
You might also spend the rest of your life looking, without any result.Ari said:
Everyone has baggage at this age, something wrong if they haven’t.
precisely, when you're talking about people who for whatever reason haven't achieved the normal pairing society expects, a few quirks at the least should be anticipated and given time and space if its to have any chance of working...Seems an odd question to put to the panel though given the individual nature of circumstances.
steveatesh said:
after all there is not much a single man can’t have if he is well resourced, compared to a man in a relationship who has to compromise and probably give a lot up for.
As above, get a dog instead.
What would he have to compromise and give up?As above, get a dog instead.
(And IME a dog is a lot more hassle as they don't exercise and feed themselves, and I've never had to follow my wife around with a plastic bag in case she s
ts in the park*)*Who knows, maybe you'd enjoy that...
hairyben said:
precisely, when you're talking about people who for whatever reason haven't achieved the normal pairing society expects, a few quirks at the least should be anticipated and given time and space if its to have any chance of working...
Seems an odd question to put to the panel though given the individual nature of circumstances.
Them, or me? Seems an odd question to put to the panel though given the individual nature of circumstances.
If them, well there are plenty of women out there who have 'achieved the normal pairing' but are no longer 'paired'.
Bill said:
What would he have to compromise and give up?
(And IME a dog is a lot more hassle as they don't exercise and feed themselves, and I've never had to follow my wife around with a plastic bag in case she sts in the park*)
*Who knows, maybe you'd enjoy that...
Totally agree about the dog, can think of little worse than living with a hairy smelly animal in the house that consumes money, time and effort, forces you out in the cold and the rain and completely ties you with regards to travelling or being away from home for other reasons unless you take the thing with you.(And IME a dog is a lot more hassle as they don't exercise and feed themselves, and I've never had to follow my wife around with a plastic bag in case she s
ts in the park*)*Who knows, maybe you'd enjoy that...
And that's before you even consider having to bend over in the street to pick up warm faeces to then carry around with you until you find a way of disposing of them...
Horrible.
Ari said:
I get the ‘do not marry’ and ‘do not buy a property jointly’ to some extent, guess it would make it harder to unwind things if it didn’t work out.
But why does it matter who moves into who’s property?
In the paranoid world inhabited by a large proportion of the blokes on here, a woman living with you gets the right to half your house pretty much immediately (unless you issue her a rent book). But why does it matter who moves into who’s property?
Regarding your question, only you can answer. You may both have quirks from living on your own but nothing ventured nothing gained. If one of you moves into the oth3r's house and rents their own out you get to try it out and if it doesn't work out then you have a mechanism to unwind the arrangement.
iphonedyou said:
Ari said:
no 'accidental' pregnancies to worry about
That's as much a council thing as a sexuality thing.But either way, it's not something gay men (or women for that matter) ever have to worry about.
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