Times your parents bought you the wrong things...
Discussion
I’m the parent at fault in this one.
When my first wife saw the light, kicked me out and subsequently divorced me, she got custody or our two sons, and I got visitation once every two weeks for half a day.
While swanning around in Granada, Spain, with the co respondent in our divorce, I bought the boys two genuine Toledo steel swords, and being pre 9/11 was able to wrap them in cardboard and bring them home as cabin baggage.
Eager to appear as Dad numero uno, and apparently also as Dad not thinking things through, I turned up at my kids school at the end of the school day, and gave them the swords.
They walked the 400 metres home from school, swords clashing like a couple of medieval Knights.
When my wife found out what I’d done, she tried to terminate my visiting rights, but I could have won an Oscar for best actor at the subsequent hearing, and I got away with it.
But I never did anything like it again, and my kids, now grown men, still laugh about it, but say that their Mum was right, as she always was.
When my first wife saw the light, kicked me out and subsequently divorced me, she got custody or our two sons, and I got visitation once every two weeks for half a day.
While swanning around in Granada, Spain, with the co respondent in our divorce, I bought the boys two genuine Toledo steel swords, and being pre 9/11 was able to wrap them in cardboard and bring them home as cabin baggage.
Eager to appear as Dad numero uno, and apparently also as Dad not thinking things through, I turned up at my kids school at the end of the school day, and gave them the swords.
They walked the 400 metres home from school, swords clashing like a couple of medieval Knights.
When my wife found out what I’d done, she tried to terminate my visiting rights, but I could have won an Oscar for best actor at the subsequent hearing, and I got away with it.
But I never did anything like it again, and my kids, now grown men, still laugh about it, but say that their Mum was right, as she always was.
Frank7][... said:
two genuine Toledo steel swords
It was awesome till the 'school' part lol I've got no real issue with giving kids pen knives, replica swords, spud guns etc etc - but they need to know where they can and can't have them and that is either in the house/garden or at a battle re enactment lol
When I was about 13 or 14 I mentioned in passing, just once, that I had enjoyed playing snooker round at a friend's house on their 3/4 size table.
Randomly that Christmas my grandmother bought me one of those really s
t 2"x4" plyboard "snooker tables" with 1" plastic balls and 2' cues. The table wasn't flat, we really had nowhere to play it as the only suitable place was the dining table which was usually (and unremarkably) covered in dining things, and above all what I had really wanted was more Scalextric or Technic Lego.
I tried desperately to be grateful, it got played about twice, then relegated to the toy cupboard never to be seen again...
Randomly that Christmas my grandmother bought me one of those really s
t 2"x4" plyboard "snooker tables" with 1" plastic balls and 2' cues. The table wasn't flat, we really had nowhere to play it as the only suitable place was the dining table which was usually (and unremarkably) covered in dining things, and above all what I had really wanted was more Scalextric or Technic Lego.I tried desperately to be grateful, it got played about twice, then relegated to the toy cupboard never to be seen again...
generationx said:
When I was about 13 or 14 I mentioned in passing, just once, that I had enjoyed playing snooker round at a friend's house on their 3/4 size table.
One of my boys friends had a football table, he'd played it a few time and said he liked it (he was 7 I think). His grandparents mentioned it as a gift and I said no, we don't really have the space, anyone to play with and it will be a fad.Next thing, they have bought one. Not just a football table though, a multi game table. So it had football, 'air' hockey, table tennis and snooker. Now, he'd only shown interest in the football bit, the table tennis was too small to be useful and the snooker table was never flat (and we actually have a full size table in an outbuilding).
So not only do we now have a table we don't want with nowhere to store it, it turns out it's flatpack.
And the instructions are Chinglish, poorly printed and hard to understand.
And I have to build it in secret.
6 hours that took me and the FIL.
It's now tucked in the corner of the cinema room having been played with about once in the last year.
You lot with your BMX's and your games consoles; as mentioned already, I wasn't allowed a BMX as it wasn't a "proper bike" and for some reason I wasn't allowed a games console either, I'm from the era of Atari 2600's.
I had to literally lie to my parents when I was round Nathans, on his Atari, my parents had odd views on electronics, for years my mum thought a VCR was the devils work until she relented because her students kept on mentioning documentaries that she had missed due to my dad watching something else (she was never a TV person and doesn't own one now).
I had to literally lie to my parents when I was round Nathans, on his Atari, my parents had odd views on electronics, for years my mum thought a VCR was the devils work until she relented because her students kept on mentioning documentaries that she had missed due to my dad watching something else (she was never a TV person and doesn't own one now).
I remember as a kid needing a new pair of trainers for school and being taken along to the local sports shop to be told I couldn’t have a pair of Adidas etc because they were too expensive and being told I was getting a pair of Reebok because they were a good price. My heart sank, everyone at school back then wore Adidas and there was me in this pair of Reebok that nobody had every heard of. Fast forward 12 months and the Reeboks were the coolest thing you could have on your feet and I was suddenly a trend setter with my pair. My dad still says to me to ti this day “do you remember when we made you a trend setter at school?” As if it was all done on purpose 
craigjm said:
I remember as a kid needing a new pair of trainers for school and being taken along to the local sports shop to be told I couldn’t have a pair of Adidas etc because they were too expensive and being told I was getting a pair of Reebok because they were a good price. My heart sank, everyone at school back then wore Adidas and there was me in this pair of Reebok that nobody had every heard of. Fast forward 12 months and the Reeboks were the coolest thing you could have on your feet and I was suddenly a trend setter with my pair. My dad still says to me to ti this day “do you remember when we made you a trend setter at school?” As if it was all done on purpose
My mum was very strict about what was to be spent on things, if I didn't want the Gola's (or whatever crap make was around then), which were more than adequate, then I had to make up the monetary difference, using my saved pocket money/birthday money etc. I remember needing glasses when I was 14, as far as my mum was concerned, the free NHS ones were fine, so I had to pay myself to have the better ones.We were always short of money but my dad had a good and well paid job, he was crap with money though so I guess that is why my mum was careful, there has always been rumours of a love child too that my dad fathered, so perhaps he was maintaining her too, my dad is dead now and my mum has told my sister that she was never sure, all a bit odd, anyway I digress.
HTP99 said:
You lot with your BMX's and your games consoles; as mentioned already, I wasn't allowed a BMX as it wasn't a "proper bike" and for some reason I wasn't allowed a games console either, I'm from the era of Atari 2600's.
I had to literally lie to my parents when I was round Nathans, on his Atari, my parents had odd views on electronics, for years my mum thought a VCR was the devils work until she relented because her students kept on mentioning documentaries that she had missed due to my dad watching something else (she was never a TV person and doesn't own one now).
Strange my dad also thought BMX's weren't proper bikes.I had to literally lie to my parents when I was round Nathans, on his Atari, my parents had odd views on electronics, for years my mum thought a VCR was the devils work until she relented because her students kept on mentioning documentaries that she had missed due to my dad watching something else (she was never a TV person and doesn't own one now).
Sorted me one out though.
Didn't have V brakes though so could never do skids.
(Google shot)
Reading through all this is an eye opener.
growing up me and my brother weren't as well off as everyone else but certainly not poor. My mum always used to buy us things we'd ask for and never got it wrong. To be fair shes always had exact taste so maybe she understood that not everything is created equal (even before we understood).
Those things were limited to xmas and birthdays though, we knew better to ask for things in between as we couldn't afford it. School shoes etc were always a compromise between what everyone else had and what we could afford, oh how I could speak to my younger self and make him understand impressing other people at school should be at the bottom of the list of priorities.
I can only think of one or two things which were different to what id asked for, but on reflection, what id asked for was unreasonable for a kid my age.
growing up me and my brother weren't as well off as everyone else but certainly not poor. My mum always used to buy us things we'd ask for and never got it wrong. To be fair shes always had exact taste so maybe she understood that not everything is created equal (even before we understood).
Those things were limited to xmas and birthdays though, we knew better to ask for things in between as we couldn't afford it. School shoes etc were always a compromise between what everyone else had and what we could afford, oh how I could speak to my younger self and make him understand impressing other people at school should be at the bottom of the list of priorities.
I can only think of one or two things which were different to what id asked for, but on reflection, what id asked for was unreasonable for a kid my age.
Ari said:
Ah, my thread has arrived. 
When I was about 14 I was a mad keen cyclist but had a fairly crappy bike. My father had a friend (well, a bloke he knew) who would keep buying stuff and then not using it - only the things he'd buy had to be the best. He'd bought this amazing 10 speed super lightweight racing bike - it was AWESOME! Ridden it twice and then stuck it in his garage. Eventually he decided to sell it (for about half what he'd paid for it) so my dad, knowing a good deal when he saw one, bought it for me.
However, we were not allowed to simply have things bought for us - only birthday or Christmas presents - so since it wasn't my birthday for six months this bike sat in our garage next to my bike unused, waiting for the day. It was the longest six months of my life, every time I dragged my old bike out of the garage to ride to school or to go to a mates in the evening (incredibly, in the olden days we used bikes as a means of transport rather than a fitness hobby), there it was. Naturally I told all my friends at school about this amazing bike I was getting. I was beside myself with excitement about this bike.
During that six months, my father decided that he was 'displeased with me' for some reason - maybe I wasn't doing as well as he felt I should at school, or I'd 'answered back' once too often.
So when my birthday came around, the bike I'd been promised, and that sat in the garage, was declared to now be my father's bike.
He didn't ride a bike, he had a car. In fact he had a new car, and when he'd got his new car it came with a stereo radio/cassette so the stereo he'd taken out of his old car became my birthday present. I was treated to a pair of cheap car parcel shelf speakers and it was wired to a car battery in my bedroom so I had a radio/cassette player.
Better yet, I was allowed to go for a bike ride with my father, him on the new bike, me on my old one.
I think that was the only time he rode it, it spent the next five years gathering dust in the garage on its now flat tyres. I, meanwhile had got two paper rounds (one morning, one evening) so I could save up for a decent bike. When I had enough money, I asked my father if he would sell me the bike. He refused.
Several years later he gave the bike away to the son of a woman who worked for him.
Your Dad sounds like a right knob! Sorry, but that's taking it well past the line of punishment for minor indiscretions.When I was about 14 I was a mad keen cyclist but had a fairly crappy bike. My father had a friend (well, a bloke he knew) who would keep buying stuff and then not using it - only the things he'd buy had to be the best. He'd bought this amazing 10 speed super lightweight racing bike - it was AWESOME! Ridden it twice and then stuck it in his garage. Eventually he decided to sell it (for about half what he'd paid for it) so my dad, knowing a good deal when he saw one, bought it for me.
However, we were not allowed to simply have things bought for us - only birthday or Christmas presents - so since it wasn't my birthday for six months this bike sat in our garage next to my bike unused, waiting for the day. It was the longest six months of my life, every time I dragged my old bike out of the garage to ride to school or to go to a mates in the evening (incredibly, in the olden days we used bikes as a means of transport rather than a fitness hobby), there it was. Naturally I told all my friends at school about this amazing bike I was getting. I was beside myself with excitement about this bike.
During that six months, my father decided that he was 'displeased with me' for some reason - maybe I wasn't doing as well as he felt I should at school, or I'd 'answered back' once too often.
So when my birthday came around, the bike I'd been promised, and that sat in the garage, was declared to now be my father's bike.
He didn't ride a bike, he had a car. In fact he had a new car, and when he'd got his new car it came with a stereo radio/cassette so the stereo he'd taken out of his old car became my birthday present. I was treated to a pair of cheap car parcel shelf speakers and it was wired to a car battery in my bedroom so I had a radio/cassette player.
Better yet, I was allowed to go for a bike ride with my father, him on the new bike, me on my old one.
I think that was the only time he rode it, it spent the next five years gathering dust in the garage on its now flat tyres. I, meanwhile had got two paper rounds (one morning, one evening) so I could save up for a decent bike. When I had enough money, I asked my father if he would sell me the bike. He refused.
Several years later he gave the bike away to the son of a woman who worked for him.
my parents went on holiday to Ibiza when I was about 16. They'd heard kids clothing was cheaper in Europe, so asked me if they could get me a couple of bits & pieces. Brilliant idea! Denim jacket & white baseball boots please, I said - looking forward to channelling my inner Bruce Dickinson. What arrived two weeks later, would've made Roger Moore cringe...A full on elastic waisted denim safari jacket & some absolutely hideous white leather pixie boots. Truly awful. I tried to make the safari jacket a bit more macho by unpicking the elastic, thinking I could then persuade my mum to change the rest of it & ended up looking like Graham Norton's lost twin. Shudder...
Edited by CardinalFang on Tuesday 23 January 13:02
Bullett said:
One of my boys friends had a football table, he'd played it a few time and said he liked it (he was 7 I think). His grandparents mentioned it as a gift and I said no, we don't really have the space, anyone to play with and it will be a fad.
Next thing, they have bought one. Not just a football table though, a multi game table. So it had football, 'air' hockey, table tennis and snooker. Now, he'd only shown interest in the football bit, the table tennis was too small to be useful and the snooker table was never flat (and we actually have a full size table in an outbuilding).
So not only do we now have a table we don't want with nowhere to store it, it turns out it's flatpack.
And the instructions are Chinglish, poorly printed and hard to understand.
And I have to build it in secret.
6 hours that took me and the FIL.
It's now tucked in the corner of the cinema room having been played with about once in the last year.
Worst "I have a big house" boast ever Next thing, they have bought one. Not just a football table though, a multi game table. So it had football, 'air' hockey, table tennis and snooker. Now, he'd only shown interest in the football bit, the table tennis was too small to be useful and the snooker table was never flat (and we actually have a full size table in an outbuilding).
So not only do we now have a table we don't want with nowhere to store it, it turns out it's flatpack.
And the instructions are Chinglish, poorly printed and hard to understand.
And I have to build it in secret.
6 hours that took me and the FIL.
It's now tucked in the corner of the cinema room having been played with about once in the last year.
Nothing like the above, but i do recall one of the early comic relief events where you could buy red noses. Everyone at school had the official charity red nose, with their lovely soft plastic for ease of putting on and off.
My parents thought that £2 for one was an extravagance, so I had to go in wearing a ping pong ball, with a section cut out of the side to put it on. It was coloured in with red marker pen.
Not only was it about half the size of the official ones (making it look like I had a cherry tomato stuck to my face), the section cut out of the side was roughly done and it felt like i was like wedging my nose between the blades of a pair of scissors. The marker pen had pretty much worn off by lunchtime.
I of course knew what was going to happen, and the combination of shame, anger, and bowel twisting anxiety as to what was about to happen when I entered the school is not one i'll forget.
My parents thought that £2 for one was an extravagance, so I had to go in wearing a ping pong ball, with a section cut out of the side to put it on. It was coloured in with red marker pen.
Not only was it about half the size of the official ones (making it look like I had a cherry tomato stuck to my face), the section cut out of the side was roughly done and it felt like i was like wedging my nose between the blades of a pair of scissors. The marker pen had pretty much worn off by lunchtime.
I of course knew what was going to happen, and the combination of shame, anger, and bowel twisting anxiety as to what was about to happen when I entered the school is not one i'll forget.
Vocal Minority said:
Ari - that is just plain vindictive!
That your posts seem balanced and rational a lot of the time is something of a miracle!
I'm clearly not trying hard enough! That your posts seem balanced and rational a lot of the time is something of a miracle!
Yeah, it was a weird upbringing. I think basically my father had (has!) pigeonholes of how he expects things and people to be and if they don't measure up or fit into those expectations he shuts them out.
I spent a lot of my teens with him simply refusing to speak to me for long periods of time. He's a very 'self made' man, did very well at school, went to university, got a good career and did very well financially for himself (although always working for other people).
After doing reasonably well at junior school I passed my 11+, got into (his old) grammar school, hated it with a passion, didn't work hard, got bad grades, was bullied quite a bit, had few friends and basically failed to live up to his lofty expectations of me. Not getting the bike was very much tied up in that.
I remember fairly early on at Grammar School I was put in a class of 'low achievers'. On the first day of a new term we were given a pep talk by our form master aimed at buoying us up and stopping us feeling like failures. He said "Just because you're in the lowest set here, don't forget that this is the lowest set of the top 20%, so you're still at the 80% or above intelligence level for your age". (I may have the percentages wrong, it was over 30 years ago - but that was the drift of it).
I was actually quite buoyed up by this and felt much better about myself. So much so that I related it to my parents when I got home, that despite struggling at Grammar School, none the less I was still in the higher regions of intelligence for boys of my age.
I've always remembered my father's response, it was simply
"Not necessarily"
8Ace said:
Nothing like the above, but i do recall one of the early comic relief events where you could buy red noses. Everyone at school had the official charity red nose, with their lovely soft plastic for ease of putting on and off.
My parents thought that £2 for one was an extravagance, so I had to go in wearing a ping pong ball, with a section cut out of the side to put it on. It was coloured in with red marker pen.
Not only was it about half the size of the official ones (making it look like I had a cherry tomato stuck to my face), the section cut out of the side was roughly done and it felt like i was like wedging my nose between the blades of a pair of scissors. The marker pen had pretty much worn off by lunchtime.
I of course knew what was going to happen, and the combination of shame, anger, and bowel twisting anxiety as to what was about to happen when I entered the school is not one i'll forget.
Extravagance ... it’s for charity lol - sorry but that’s just cheapMy parents thought that £2 for one was an extravagance, so I had to go in wearing a ping pong ball, with a section cut out of the side to put it on. It was coloured in with red marker pen.
Not only was it about half the size of the official ones (making it look like I had a cherry tomato stuck to my face), the section cut out of the side was roughly done and it felt like i was like wedging my nose between the blades of a pair of scissors. The marker pen had pretty much worn off by lunchtime.
I of course knew what was going to happen, and the combination of shame, anger, and bowel twisting anxiety as to what was about to happen when I entered the school is not one i'll forget.
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