Peer pressure to buy kids phones
Discussion
RC1807 said:
My youngest's phone dies when the battery shows 30%, and she now wants an Android, convinced it's only Apple programming slower performance,
That’s what my kids believe too.Youngest has an iPhone 6 which he has had since they were first launched. He’s in his first year at University now. He’d like a new phone but has been told to make do with what he has. He’s never broken it. It’s always been in a case of his choosing, so perhaps avoiding the lack of coolness!
The eldest has an iPhone SE. This was bought when he went to university just over two years ago. He has to be persuaded to have anything new - whatever he has at the time he says is good enough.
He is writing a novel in his spare time and does so on a dog slow laptop which has to use an external keyboard because coffee was spilt on the laptop. I just offered to contribute most of the cost of a new one and he says what he has is perfectly adequate. He’s never broken a phone either - always been in a case too.
g3org3y said:
Do you think maybe that level of use is excessive?
Unfortunately I think everyone is addicted to their phones (or more accurately addicted to social media). I see that on a daily basis during consultations. People genuinely can't put the phone down or go for 10 mins without looking at it.
Potentially yes, however it is what it is, lives are lived in these devices by this generation - I don’t expect people (or even myself to understand this) but it’s now a fact of lifeUnfortunately I think everyone is addicted to their phones (or more accurately addicted to social media). I see that on a daily basis during consultations. People genuinely can't put the phone down or go for 10 mins without looking at it.
I'd say 12 and 14 is a few years off actually "needing" anything like a decent iphone. My two were mid-late teens before we started spending more than a couple of hundred on phones for them with a £10 a month SIM. Now its a bit different as one is away from home and they both genuinely use their phones for studies and more than just face ache etc.
Personally I don't see the need but then I still have my original 4S although my daughter has offered me her old 8 when she/I upgrade her to an X as Christmas
Personally I don't see the need but then I still have my original 4S although my daughter has offered me her old 8 when she/I upgrade her to an X as Christmas
wjwren said:
All the kids in secondary schools seem to have iphone's. These things are not cheap, why do parents give in?
Possibly because many parents would rather be their children's best friend, rather than place appropriate boundaries which will enable their kids to flourish and grow up to become responsible adults.In my line of work I come across many people who have suffered as a result of their parents' abdication of their responsibilities.
13 year old sister has had a 6S for less than 12 months (last xmas) and she wants a better phone this Xmas, a plus of some description (7 or 8).
Mum currently pays around £20 for her current contract, I explained a 7+ would be £350 minimum to buy or could go on contract for maybe £35+, oh and you need to pay off the remaining 12m of the old contract.
Kids don't know they're born these days. That^^ is a lot of money in my book. Especially when the phone she has now is more than adequate.
Mum currently pays around £20 for her current contract, I explained a 7+ would be £350 minimum to buy or could go on contract for maybe £35+, oh and you need to pay off the remaining 12m of the old contract.
Kids don't know they're born these days. That^^ is a lot of money in my book. Especially when the phone she has now is more than adequate.
Give them your hand me downs. If that's not good enough then get a paper round, wash cars, save up birthday/Christmas money etc and instil some sense of the value of money.
That's said my kids (both under 7) are happy to have old phones that don't even switch on to play with to "call" other family members. Not sure a 10 year blackberry that doesn't do anything will cut it when they are a bit older though!
That's said my kids (both under 7) are happy to have old phones that don't even switch on to play with to "call" other family members. Not sure a 10 year blackberry that doesn't do anything will cut it when they are a bit older though!
I’m genuinely shocked at most of the responses here, I think many replying here may be well out of touch with how 11-17yr olds live and exist, whether you agree or not.
Parents drop much more on less - think about what a phone of calbire discussed does and how it’s used; photos, games, apps, calls, payments and finance, messaging, (potential) tracking and security assurance for parents and all for what amounts to pennies per day
Parents drop much more on less - think about what a phone of calbire discussed does and how it’s used; photos, games, apps, calls, payments and finance, messaging, (potential) tracking and security assurance for parents and all for what amounts to pennies per day
Having just "splashed out" on the very latest iPhone XR for my wife, I can tell you that it costs the grand total of £34 per month with £0 put down, for a 30 month contract, on Sky Mobile for anyone interested. Which is fine, neither of us need to have the latest one every year, this is replacing an old iphone 5 she's had for about 3 years now.
Which is actually cheaper than my iPhone 7 per month, though I specifically opted for the one with the bigger memory when I took it out for me.
But whilst I can see that parents are "under pressure" to spend this on their kids... it is their choice to do so, or give them hand me downs? There are plenty of deals out there for them if you shop about, though I know most people won't do that.
Which is actually cheaper than my iPhone 7 per month, though I specifically opted for the one with the bigger memory when I took it out for me.
But whilst I can see that parents are "under pressure" to spend this on their kids... it is their choice to do so, or give them hand me downs? There are plenty of deals out there for them if you shop about, though I know most people won't do that.
My eldest, when aged 14, decided she was fed up with my hand-me-down Android phones and wanted an iPhone. I told her how much we'd contribute towards it for her birthday and Christmas presents, and she then went out and got herself a part time job to earn enough to pay for the rest. I was really pleased to buy her her iPhone (despite the fact that it's a piece of overpriced crap) when she proudly handed over the cash she'd saved. 
My middle one has a hand me down iPhone 5 from his gran. He wants a bigger, shinier one, and is frustrated that he'll have to wait until next year to get a part time job to earn the extra.
My youngest is still happy with my Android hand-me-downs, so probably still has the most powerful phone of the three of them.
My middle one has a hand me down iPhone 5 from his gran. He wants a bigger, shinier one, and is frustrated that he'll have to wait until next year to get a part time job to earn the extra.
My youngest is still happy with my Android hand-me-downs, so probably still has the most powerful phone of the three of them.
alorotom said:
Also though I did buy my nephew his first phone (a Nokia Lumia beater to see how he got on with it) when he was 10/11 and his first iPhone (iPhone 8 christmas last year, his parents provide the sim) he was 12/13
I'm surprised you didn't get your nephew a Motorola...Edited by alorotom on Wednesday 14th November 06:31
My rules were. No phones till big school, always hand me downs and if they break it the replacement will always be a downgrade unless they contribute the difference themselves.
In this day and age the ability to track your child (especially boys) is worth the investment in my view.
New version of iOS allows parental control of screen time.
In this day and age the ability to track your child (especially boys) is worth the investment in my view.
New version of iOS allows parental control of screen time.
ST Ford said:
I know I find it shocking how kids just expect the latest iPhone and parents think nothing of getting them a contract phone which probably amounts to around 1k in cost over 2 years all in. My cousin and all her friends at the age of 12 expect the latest iPhone and expensive designer hand bags to go to school with trying to look like Kim Kardashian it’s sad.
I over heard 2 women in work discussing there sons Christmas presents 1 is getting a new iPhone X probably about £200 down and £50 p/m for 2yrs a £500 Canada Goose jacket because all his friends have them and a new laptop. And the other was the new iPhone, Xbox one and big screen tv. Neither have got much money yet won’t hesitate to buy such ridiculous things for there kids. And another woman who’s 13yr old brat has gone through 3 IPhones in the last year! One was smashed on purpose throwing a tantrum yet she still gets her another claiming off the insurance like it’s nothing.
Nobody has any sense of value anymore
I don't think it's about a sense of value, I think it's more about wanting to be seen as a 'cool' parent, keeping up with the Jones' or just outright trying to buy their kids love/respect.I over heard 2 women in work discussing there sons Christmas presents 1 is getting a new iPhone X probably about £200 down and £50 p/m for 2yrs a £500 Canada Goose jacket because all his friends have them and a new laptop. And the other was the new iPhone, Xbox one and big screen tv. Neither have got much money yet won’t hesitate to buy such ridiculous things for there kids. And another woman who’s 13yr old brat has gone through 3 IPhones in the last year! One was smashed on purpose throwing a tantrum yet she still gets her another claiming off the insurance like it’s nothing.
Nobody has any sense of value anymore
Parents seem to be too scared of disciplining children, no one wants to be the mean parent. It would go a long way to explaining why teenagers and younger people seem to be more and more spoilt and entitled.
alorotom said:
I’m genuinely shocked at most of the responses here, I think many replying here may be well out of touch with how 11-17yr olds live and exist, whether you agree or not.
Parents drop much more on less - think about what a phone of calbire discussed does and how it’s used; photos, games, apps, calls, payments and finance, messaging, (potential) tracking and security assurance for parents and all for what amounts to pennies per day
Likewise I'd say you're probably out of touch with how a lot of less well off parents live. Ignore the stereotype of benefits claimants running around with the latest iPhone, that's the 'headline grabber' which people notice, rather than the majority who get by on the basics.Parents drop much more on less - think about what a phone of calbire discussed does and how it’s used; photos, games, apps, calls, payments and finance, messaging, (potential) tracking and security assurance for parents and all for what amounts to pennies per day
Take my SIL as an example - works full time but a single parent with 2 kids (14 and 9) and by and large lives a hand to mouth existence. There's no way she could afford 2x £30-£40 a month for the latest iPhone - luckily her kids are happy with whatever hand-me downs they are given (at least for now).
We had the same issue with our kids - the youngest is still at primary school and was "demanding" that he needed a phone. As he's spending a bit more time out of the house with friends, we got him a very cheap non-smart phone, £20 PAYG.
It was a tactical ploy though - their father who has never paid a penny in maintenance and quit his job so that he could work cash in hand, claim benefits and have a zero rated CSA/CMA payment, then bought the youngest a Samsung S6 on contract and the eldest an iphone 7 on contract....
He pays for F-all else, so he is welcome to the expense. Both phones are scratched and cracked already after 6 weeks, "because cases arent cool"....
It was a tactical ploy though - their father who has never paid a penny in maintenance and quit his job so that he could work cash in hand, claim benefits and have a zero rated CSA/CMA payment, then bought the youngest a Samsung S6 on contract and the eldest an iphone 7 on contract....
He pays for F-all else, so he is welcome to the expense. Both phones are scratched and cracked already after 6 weeks, "because cases arent cool"....
My two have iPhone SEs, daughter got hers for her birthday in July (she's 11) my son got my old one from work, he didn't want one, but he travels to school on the bus 8 miles away and we thought it would be handy (he's 12).
Phones were paid for but I pay for the sim contract so I don't have to top up. Gives me control too, knowing that I pay for it and subsequently they know I can 'pull' these from them if needed on behaviour grounds, thankfully not needed to.
Neither of them are particularly bothered by the fancy stuff at the moment.
Son broke the screen on his and paid for it to be replaced himself, so he now has an industrial phone case too lol! So they do learn if you take the right steps.
Briliant story from my daughter last week was that her friend's mum checked her phone and saw that she'd been using the phone during a class (silly upload of a musically) and she phoned the school to tell them and they gave her an after school detention.....top parenting!!
No phones are allowed on or to be seen during school hours and i'd do the same if my two did it.
Phones were paid for but I pay for the sim contract so I don't have to top up. Gives me control too, knowing that I pay for it and subsequently they know I can 'pull' these from them if needed on behaviour grounds, thankfully not needed to.
Neither of them are particularly bothered by the fancy stuff at the moment.
Son broke the screen on his and paid for it to be replaced himself, so he now has an industrial phone case too lol! So they do learn if you take the right steps.
Briliant story from my daughter last week was that her friend's mum checked her phone and saw that she'd been using the phone during a class (silly upload of a musically) and she phoned the school to tell them and they gave her an after school detention.....top parenting!!
No phones are allowed on or to be seen during school hours and i'd do the same if my two did it.
My 12 year old has an iPhone5 we got free from a friend as they had been through two upgrades since, it was sitting in a drawer and had a cracked screen.
If it breaks I guess she'll get my £100 Android phone and I'll get a new one. No way I'm stumping up several weeks wages for a new iPhone.
Her school bans phones completely. Phones must be in bags (not pockets) and must be switched off. Any pupils found holding a phone (on or off, in use or not) will have it confiscated and their parents can collect it from the school on the next Friday after school. It will not be given back to the pupil.
Seems to work.
If it breaks I guess she'll get my £100 Android phone and I'll get a new one. No way I'm stumping up several weeks wages for a new iPhone.
Her school bans phones completely. Phones must be in bags (not pockets) and must be switched off. Any pupils found holding a phone (on or off, in use or not) will have it confiscated and their parents can collect it from the school on the next Friday after school. It will not be given back to the pupil.
Seems to work.
I also have their devices blocked off the wifi from 8pm every night, til 8.30am - they do have data on the sim, but this is usually burned through in a day or two of renewal.
Data refresh day means they don't sleep for 2-3 days before the "can i have more wifi time" wailing starts....
Data refresh day means they don't sleep for 2-3 days before the "can i have more wifi time" wailing starts....
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