Sean Connery Joke Thread (Vol 10ish)

Sean Connery Joke Thread (Vol 10ish)

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vaud

50,426 posts

155 months

Friday 4th February 2022
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V6 Pushfit said:
Wayne Bruce the 3rd ? Either he’s American or he’s Royalty.
3rd indicates that he isn't a direct or secondary contact from my linkedin connections.

anonymous-user

54 months

Friday 4th February 2022
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vaud said:
V6 Pushfit said:
Wayne Bruce the 3rd ? Either he’s American or he’s Royalty.
3rd indicates that he isn't a direct or secondary contact from my linkedin connections.
Don’t ruin it.

He looks like an American.

vaud

50,426 posts

155 months

Friday 4th February 2022
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"Brad, short for bradawl - small boring tool"

Love this one.

Jasandjules

69,869 posts

229 months

Friday 4th February 2022
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We used to call a guy POD> Profit of Doom.

glenrobbo

35,219 posts

150 months

Friday 4th February 2022
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Jasandjules said:
We used to call a guy POD> Profit of Doom.
Do you mean like the Wages of Sin? biggrin

Jasandjules

69,869 posts

229 months

Friday 4th February 2022
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glenrobbo said:
Jasandjules said:
We used to call a guy POD> Profit of Doom.
Do you mean like the Wages of Sin? biggrin
Sadly nothing so interesting.

Doofus

25,784 posts

173 months

Friday 4th February 2022
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Jasandjules said:
glenrobbo said:
Jasandjules said:
We used to call a guy POD> Profit of Doom.
Do you mean like the Wages of Sin? biggrin
Sadly nothing so interesting.
Prophet?

Jasandjules

69,869 posts

229 months

Friday 4th February 2022
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Doofus said:
Prophet?
Well, insofar as he predicted everything would fail, go wrong etc then yes I suppose.... I should add this was in a bank so it was "funny" to write "Profit" of Doom in messages etc....

sly fox

2,226 posts

219 months

Friday 4th February 2022
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Mastiff said:
Deserved a clap
Am sure that was a Dave Allen joke? Superb nonetheless.

silverfoxcc

7,688 posts

145 months

Friday 4th February 2022
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We called our bosss's boss The Angel of Death

Her only came into our main office when someone had died. As soon as he walked in the door we did a head count on who wasn't at their desk

Vipers

32,869 posts

228 months

Friday 4th February 2022
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An Arab sheikh was admitted to hospital for heart surgery, he had a very rare blood type and the local blood bank had none, some was required in case he needed it during the operation.

As the sheikh had a rare type of blood, and couldn't be found locally, a call went out. Finally a Scotsman was located who had the same blood type. The Scot willingly donated his blood for the Arab.

After the surgery, the Arab sent the Scotsman in appreciation for giving his blood, a new BMW, diamonds and a cheque for £100,000.

A couple of days later, once again, the Arab had to go through a corrective surgery. The hospital telephoned the Scotsman who was more than happy to donate his blood again. After the second surgery, the Arab sent the Scotsman a thank-you card and a box of chocolates.

The Scotsman was shocked that the Arab did not reciprocate his kind gesture as he had anticipated. He phoned the Arab and asked him: "I thought you'd be generous again, that you would give me another BMW, diamonds and money...but you only gave me a thank-you card and a box of chocolates."

To this the Arab replied: "Aye laddie, but I now have Scottish blood in me veins!

Ultra Sound Guy

28,634 posts

194 months

Friday 4th February 2022
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URGENT: looking for reliable tenants for a beautiful building with office on ground floor and a recently decorated flat above.
Having real issues with this property, last two tenants left before their fixed term ended, police always at the door, current tenants constantly hosting parties.
Can offer fixed term tenancy of 4 years, any interest let me know, RENT IS NEGOTIABLE the address is:
10 Downing Street

Trenchard

303 posts

28 months

Friday 4th February 2022
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Trenchard

303 posts

28 months

Friday 4th February 2022
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Archaeologists have finally unearthed documents that verify who led the Pedants Revolt in 1381...

Which Tyler.

Edited by Trenchard on Friday 4th February 20:32

motco

15,944 posts

246 months

Friday 4th February 2022
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Whom Tyler surely?

Caddyshack

10,723 posts

206 months

Friday 4th February 2022
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Trenchard said:
Archaeologists have finally unearhed documents that verify who led the Pedants Revolt in 1381...

Which Tyler.
Unearhed?

Doofus

25,784 posts

173 months

Friday 4th February 2022
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Caddyshack said:
Trenchard said:
Archaeologists have finally unearhed documents that verify who led the Pedants Revolt in 1381...

Which Tyler.
Unearhed?
Wat?

Trenchard

303 posts

28 months

Friday 4th February 2022
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Caddyshack said:
Unearhed?
FTFY

Monkeylegend

26,335 posts

231 months

Friday 4th February 2022
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Caddyshack said:
Trenchard said:
Archaeologists have finally unearhed documents that verify who led the Pedants Revolt in 1381...

Which Tyler.
Unearhed?
I thought it was deliberate to bring the revolting pedants out, but obviously that was too clever.

Trenchard

303 posts

28 months

Friday 4th February 2022
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Monkeylegend said:
I thought it was deliberate to bring the revolting pedants out, but obviously that was too clever.
But nobody likes a smartass.

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