Sean Connery Joke Thread (Vol 11)
Discussion
One day Father Christmas, the Easter Bunny and a poor solicitor were sitting on a park bench when out of the sky fluttered down a load of £50 notes.
Who do you think picked them up?
none of them since they are all figments of our imagination!
Apologies to any poor solicitors - I first saw this joke in an accountants joke book!
Who do you think picked them up?
none of them since they are all figments of our imagination!
Apologies to any poor solicitors - I first saw this joke in an accountants joke book!
So to balance it out, here is an accountant joke
A mathematician, a statistician and an accountant were in a job interview for a CEO role
The interviewer calls in the mathematician first, the interview goes well and for the last question the interviewer asks, "What does two plus two equal?"
The mathematician replies, "Four."
The interviewer says great and then calls in the statistician, and after another good interview he asks the same question, "What does two plus two equal?"
The statistician says, "With such a small sample size the answer is four give or take point three percent, but on 9 times out of 10 the answer will be four.”
Satisfied, the interviewer then calls in the accountant and at the end of the interview poses the same question, "What does two plus two equal?"
Very suddenly the accountant gets up, locks the door, closes the curtaina disconnects the phone, then approaches the interviewer and asks, "What do you want it to be?"
A mathematician, a statistician and an accountant were in a job interview for a CEO role
The interviewer calls in the mathematician first, the interview goes well and for the last question the interviewer asks, "What does two plus two equal?"
The mathematician replies, "Four."
The interviewer says great and then calls in the statistician, and after another good interview he asks the same question, "What does two plus two equal?"
The statistician says, "With such a small sample size the answer is four give or take point three percent, but on 9 times out of 10 the answer will be four.”
Satisfied, the interviewer then calls in the accountant and at the end of the interview poses the same question, "What does two plus two equal?"
Very suddenly the accountant gets up, locks the door, closes the curtaina disconnects the phone, then approaches the interviewer and asks, "What do you want it to be?"
ExBoringVolvoDriver said:
One day Father Christmas, the Easter Bunny and an poor honest solicitor were sitting on a park bench when out of the sky fluttered down a load of £50 notes.
Who do you think picked them up?
Neither of them since they are figments of our imagination!
Apologies to any honest solicitors
Fixed... Who do you think picked them up?
Neither of them since they are figments of our imagination!
Apologies to any honest solicitors
littleredrooster said:
During an early morning security inspection at Aintree Racecourse this morning, a couple were caught 'in flagrante delecto' underneath Bechers Brook.
When they were carted off to the local nick, they asked for six other fences to be taken into consideration.
oh come on - I can only use it once a year...
A further once a year joke.When they were carted off to the local nick, they asked for six other fences to be taken into consideration.
oh come on - I can only use it once a year...
The Oxford and Cambridge boat race has been cancelled. Why? Water logged pitch.
Edited by Sixteen Stone on Sunday 12th April 15:34
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