365 days without booze... join me?
Discussion
425 days and checking in. The last couple of weeks have been impossibly difficult as my Mum has been confirmed as having CJD and only has a couple of months to live.
I was back in the UK a couple of weeks back and was struck by the ease at which booze is available and at hand. I couldn’t help thinking, how much harder it would have been trying to juggle drinking with trying to be with Mum or present for everything that’s going on.
There’s always, always an excuse to drink, I’m so glad I’m able to say no to myself. I cannot begin to imagine how hard this would be if I was dealing with it boozing.
If I can not drink on a normal day, let alone a bad one, trust me if you’re reading this and wondering if you can do it…
You can.
I was back in the UK a couple of weeks back and was struck by the ease at which booze is available and at hand. I couldn’t help thinking, how much harder it would have been trying to juggle drinking with trying to be with Mum or present for everything that’s going on.
There’s always, always an excuse to drink, I’m so glad I’m able to say no to myself. I cannot begin to imagine how hard this would be if I was dealing with it boozing.
If I can not drink on a normal day, let alone a bad one, trust me if you’re reading this and wondering if you can do it…
You can.
11 days. Longest in I don't know how long. On the back of a couple of stupid binges, the latter of which gave me a proper wake up call. I don't know how much but close to a bottle of gin a day for a week or so; the withdrawal was not much fun at all. Missus distinctly unimpressed, as you can imagine.
Took about a week to feel normal but I've been so much more productive, appetite is back to normal, exercise has been excellent, sleep is good and dare I say sex life has been great. This 'new' life has left me seriously asking WTAF I was playing at. Current plan is to do (at least) dry March then see how I feel about the odd glass of wine on a weekend - but I'm perfectly open to just parking it forever, I don't want to find myself undoing the good work I've done by staying off it. Went to the pub twice over the weekend; Saturday we went for a country drive and I had a coffee Sunday none of the 0% offerings appealed so had lime & soda which was nice and refreshing sitting in warm sunshine - no compulsion to have alcohol at all. It's early days so I'm perfectly aware there's likely to be some wobbles along the way, but I feel like I'm reprogramming myself and the longer I go without the less I fancy it.
Head still feels a bit foggy though - how long does that take to subside? From my readings here I know it could be summer before I'm feeling properly refreshed and getting the full benefit and that is highly motivating - I want that feeling! I know which feeling I prefer and given it takes days to shake off a hangover a few hours drinking isn't even close to being worth the trade off.
Took about a week to feel normal but I've been so much more productive, appetite is back to normal, exercise has been excellent, sleep is good and dare I say sex life has been great. This 'new' life has left me seriously asking WTAF I was playing at. Current plan is to do (at least) dry March then see how I feel about the odd glass of wine on a weekend - but I'm perfectly open to just parking it forever, I don't want to find myself undoing the good work I've done by staying off it. Went to the pub twice over the weekend; Saturday we went for a country drive and I had a coffee Sunday none of the 0% offerings appealed so had lime & soda which was nice and refreshing sitting in warm sunshine - no compulsion to have alcohol at all. It's early days so I'm perfectly aware there's likely to be some wobbles along the way, but I feel like I'm reprogramming myself and the longer I go without the less I fancy it.
Head still feels a bit foggy though - how long does that take to subside? From my readings here I know it could be summer before I'm feeling properly refreshed and getting the full benefit and that is highly motivating - I want that feeling! I know which feeling I prefer and given it takes days to shake off a hangover a few hours drinking isn't even close to being worth the trade off.
othername said:
Head still feels a bit foggy though - how long does that take to subside?
Depends on a lot of factors but given your described consumption, then a couple of weeks should see you feeling less tired in the mornings and more alert throughout the days. As I understand it, even moderate consumption is still evident within the system for 3-4 days.Give it another week or so and I am pretty sure you will begin to see a fairly significant difference.
Digga said:
othername said:
Head still feels a bit foggy though - how long does that take to subside?
Depends on a lot of factors but given your described consumption, then a couple of weeks should see you feeling less tired in the mornings and more alert throughout the days. As I understand it, even moderate consumption is still evident within the system for 3-4 days.Give it another week or so and I am pretty sure you will begin to see a fairly significant difference.
Once it does, you've broken the habit.
Knocking on 5 years for me, mostly social drinker who was finding even a small amount was calling the black dog. Not looked back. Sure, a couple of people are still dumbfounded that I can quit and not intend to go back, but interestingly, both these people have a definite drinking problem. The rest of my mates don't really give a monkeys and a few are cutting down anyway.
I stopped for a year about 18 years ago (had a very boozy London based job back then) and it was very different - no decent alcohol free and people thought I'd converted to Islam or had had some sort of breakdown. Nowadays, nobody really seems to bat an eyelid and the pub is full of decent AF beers.
Digga said:
Depends on a lot of factors but given your described consumption, then a couple of weeks should see you feeling less tired in the mornings and more alert throughout the days. As I understand it, even moderate consumption is still evident within the system for 3-4 days.
Give it another week or so and I am pretty sure you will begin to see a fairly significant difference.
Cheers; yeah I didn't expect to suddenly feel great after a week of abstinence especially after such stupid binges (2 lots of a week of gin & vodka within a week of each other). Feeling better today than yesterday, which was better than the day prior, etc... I can very well see myself getting to the end of the month and setting myself a new target, then another etc. One day at a time, right? Give it another week or so and I am pretty sure you will begin to see a fairly significant difference.
Castrol for a knave said:
even a small amount was calling the black dog.
This is a very good point and another reason the last binge (or rather, the aftermath) scared me into knowing this has to be it. I felt genuinely suicidal for a couple of days after, had planned what to do, my emotions were all over the place and I couldn't see an escape. Just more fuel for the 'WTF were you playing at' questions to myself.othername said:
Cheers; yeah I didn't expect to suddenly feel great after a week of abstinence especially after such stupid binges (2 lots of a week of gin & vodka within a week of each other). Feeling better today than yesterday, which was better than the day prior, etc... I can very well see myself getting to the end of the month and setting myself a new target, then another etc. One day at a time, right?
It may be worth swerving the pub for a while, at least until you have a more focused take on your situation.Temptation can be unhelpful early in the process.
Definitely swerve the pub in the early days, you can always pop in once you’re settled. Definitely one day at a time, there’s no other way to do it and a week/month/forever is hard for our brains to manage.
Good luck, I promise it does get better, there’s bumps on the way and days when you’ll question it, then it’s not until someone brings it up that to remember you don’t drink anymore. Not drinking is quite a cool thing these days, hang in there bud.
It definitely helps manage hard things when you're clear headed, way, way easier than hungover and hanxious.
Good luck, I promise it does get better, there’s bumps on the way and days when you’ll question it, then it’s not until someone brings it up that to remember you don’t drink anymore. Not drinking is quite a cool thing these days, hang in there bud.
It definitely helps manage hard things when you're clear headed, way, way easier than hungover and hanxious.
Edited by Boozy on Tuesday 25th March 14:28
3rd day of the hangover still feeling the hangziety, regret and physical pain.
It’s always been easy for me to gaslight myself into thinking alcohol isn’t an issue because I only binge drink every now and then at social events. Don’t drink otherwise. And I try to convince myself that I can control myself by only drinking beer/only drinking so much but in reality it never works out that way.
My issue is nearly all my social interactions with friends/work colleagues/dating have and do revolve around drink so it currently feels like it’s going to be a choice between continuing this trend or being more isolated.
Curious to know how others have dealt with this and whether they continued the same relationships being the only sober one, or if you had to find new relationships that made being tee total easier.
It’s always been easy for me to gaslight myself into thinking alcohol isn’t an issue because I only binge drink every now and then at social events. Don’t drink otherwise. And I try to convince myself that I can control myself by only drinking beer/only drinking so much but in reality it never works out that way.
My issue is nearly all my social interactions with friends/work colleagues/dating have and do revolve around drink so it currently feels like it’s going to be a choice between continuing this trend or being more isolated.
Curious to know how others have dealt with this and whether they continued the same relationships being the only sober one, or if you had to find new relationships that made being tee total easier.
I lost a lot of “friends” when I stopped but it turned out they were just drinking buddies. I did meet up with them a few times but without the bond of getting wrecked together we had nothing in common.
It is difficult at the beginning but once I realized it’s perfectly normal to drift apart it’s fine.
My real friends supported me but associates dropped me like a hot stone!
It is difficult at the beginning but once I realized it’s perfectly normal to drift apart it’s fine.
My real friends supported me but associates dropped me like a hot stone!
I’m on day 37, had my first real ‘test’ on Saturday by going round to our friends house. Lots of questions and a little bit of mickey taking but once that was done no one mentioned it again all evening. I sat drinking 3l of water and a couple of ginger beers, enjoyed the evening just as much without the beers watching the rugby.
The thought of having a drink turns my stomach at the thought, it’s odd how the switch has just flipped for me.
Have got a bit of anxiety feeling today which is slightly odd as I’ve only really experienced that post drinking.
The thought of having a drink turns my stomach at the thought, it’s odd how the switch has just flipped for me.
Have got a bit of anxiety feeling today which is slightly odd as I’ve only really experienced that post drinking.
Blib said:
othername said:
Cheers; yeah I didn't expect to suddenly feel great after a week of abstinence especially after such stupid binges (2 lots of a week of gin & vodka within a week of each other). Feeling better today than yesterday, which was better than the day prior, etc... I can very well see myself getting to the end of the month and setting myself a new target, then another etc. One day at a time, right?
It may be worth swerving the pub for a while, at least until you have a more focused take on your situation.Temptation can be unhelpful early in the process.
The bigger challenge is home as it's pretty much our routine to sit down Friday night and have a few glasses of wine (or G&T as was my tipple lately). My missus (being a Yorkshire lass) likes a drink and has a glass of wine most nights, good bit more on Friday. Last couple of Fridays I just didn't fancy any at all, although Saturday evening sitting in the sun (on our balcony having a smoke) there was undeniable temptation - I think as much as anything because it's been a habit being in that environment triggers the 'usual' receptors to expect some booze. I did some exercise half an hour later instead 
I read somewhere that habits can be formed/broken in as little as 3-4 weeks - perhaps that's where the idea of doing a dry month comes from, as it's long enough to break a habit and potentially effect long term changes in behaviour. Just over 2 weeks for me now and plan is still to see out dry March which conveniently ends on a Sunday so if I do drink more than likely it won't be till the following Friday. If I do. I don't know. I'll see how I feel then, I do know I don't want to undo any positivity I've gained from doing a dry month. I see this as just a first step to permanent behaviour change really - what that behaviour will be I'm not sure of yet, other than it definitely won't be descending into a stupid binge ever again.
Bilb is right, I can only talk to what I went through and was a pretty consistent drinker for years. It definitely took some retraining of the brain and learning what emotions were when I stopped drinking. Alcohol is exceptional at masking stuff short term and retraining your brain, to deal with things you previously drank away, takes time, practice and a lot of grace to yourself.
It's not an easy road, but it gets better - I can promise you all that much.
It's not an easy road, but it gets better - I can promise you all that much.
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